a journey

One of the biggest misconceptions about taking care of yourself is the systematic and erroneous association of self-care with extreme consumerism. This idea conveys the image of self-care as something reserved to those who can afford it. The truth is, and many already know this, there are countless ways to be good to yourself without spending more than necessary.

☐ Get enough sleep. A child would need 10 to 12 hours of sleep per night. The average is between 7 and 9 hours for an adult. I can never say it enough, but sleep is an important part of our lives. Value it highly. It's an elementary need: not getting enough sleep puts us at risk of developing numerous chronic diseases: such as high blood pressure, diabetes, heart failure, coronary heart disease and some types of cancer. You are also more likely to suffer a stroke.

☐ Turn the volume down. Since I'm riding the wave of how we 21st century people are neglecting our health, I also want to stress the importance of auditory health. If, like me, you love to spend hours with headphones on, consider turning down the volume. I know it's much more enjoyable to experience it fully, but having gone through the terrible experience of tinnitus, I bitterly regret it. There is a simple way to track your auditory health: please check your smartphone's headphone safety features.

☐ Don't neglect your medical appointments. I have always been very anxious about it. Not to the point of pulling my hair out, but I used to postpone my appointment so much that I sometimes forgot why I even wanted to go. There are countless of reasons why we may not like to go to the doctor, but the truth is that health issues simply cannot wait. It is equally important to go see your doctor even if you think you are in perfect condition.

☐ Be physically active. Always keep in mind that your body, like your mind, needs to be stimulated. Besides allowing you to manage your weight more effectively, sport improve your brain health, reduces health risks and strengthens both your muscles and your bones.

☐ Watch your language. It's more personal, but it introduces a sense of discipline into your mind. The turns of phrase, the informal language, the way we speak, the choice of words, the syntax… Speaking is the perfect expression of the mind. This does not mean abolishing the use of crude words, but rather regaining control, becoming master of your language again. Your words should never exceed your thoughts. In my opinion, a rich language reflects the attention the speaker pays to it. When was the last time you learned a new word?

☐ Clean your space. The cleanliness of your living space has a big impact on your productivity. A messy space can lead to a messy mind. Home is, for many of us, the place we feel most comfortable: keeping your living space clean and organized naturally improves the quality of your life, your sleep and your health. Clean regularly, let the sun shine in and air out daily.

☐ Avoid ads. Easier said than done. But try not to have your mind parasitized by the multitude of advertisements we are flooded with. I don't watch television. I do have access to a music platform so I don't have to deal with the constant stream of ads on YouTube.

☐ Go for a walk. Pretending to discover your city or town anew can do wonders for a mind in need of a little distraction. Check out some of the free events that may be happening near you. Visit a park you've never been to before.

☐ Give yourself a reason to wait. Try to establish a ritual of patience. In other words… You stop binge watching every new show you start and you take your time to appreciate it.

☐ Stimulate your mind. The internet has given us more ways than ever to keep our minds busy. For those who know me a little, I am a big fan of reading. And if physical books can indeed be expensive, you can find some really good ones for free in .pdf format. In fact, some kind souls have even gone so far as to share entire drives of them on Tumblr... Going further in my reflection, I think that the scourge of our century is the intellectual lethargy: everything is at our fingertips, why bother reading a whole book when I have access to a detailed summary of only a few pages? Beyond the spiritual enrichment, it is also a proof of patience to seize a book and give it three hours of your time. I sincerely believe that as human beings, we owe it to ourselves to keep our senses and our minds alert. Reading is a great way to exercise our brain as it helps stimulate our cognitive abilities. It allows us to develop our capacity for memorization, reflection, analysis and imagination. Try coloring for adults (yes, it's a thing: ■ ■). There are also many games for adults online with the aim of stimulating memory and improving concentration (■, ■.). Try solving online puzzles, fake criminal investigations, math problems? Learn how to code (with Codecademy for example, which offers many courses for free). Take language courses. Many general knowledge quizzes are also available to anyone who is interested (■) . The web is a real goldmine in terms of resources and many are available for free.

☐ Finally, this list would be meaningless without me asking you to learn to relax. Give yourself a day off if you need to. It is essential to take it easy, to get your nose out of your planning, to look up from your screen and breathe in some fresh air through the window. I advise all those who try to relax to start a digital detox: we must learn to relax independently, without a screen and regain control over the objects of our stimulation.

ʀᴇᴍɪɴᴅᴇʀ → It takes an average of 66 days to create or change a habit. Don’t give up now!

☐ Take off your shoes when you get home. According to several studies, the sole of a shoe can carry hundreds of thousands of bacteria. In a biblical passage, God is said to have spoken to Moses in these words: “Take off your sandals, for the place where you are standing is holy ground.” Isn't that what the safety and comfort of a home means to us? A sanctuary for the soul? Taking off one's shoes is just the smallest sign of reverence. For this very reason, I try to keep my environment as clean as possible.

☐ Fulfill your commitments. Study, finish your work or respond to the last emails of the day. I don't get changed until I'm done. This is an important part as it allows me to ease my mind about the duties I know I am handling. It's hard for me to relax knowing I have a something to do.

☐ Disconnect, break away from screens as early as possible. Try to get away from the constant attention and energy demanded by our electronic gadgets. Blue light causes your brain to believe that it's still daytime, resulting in a reduction of the production of melatonin. In other words, your brain starts working to keep you awake. For those of you who are curious, I don't watch television, as I don't have one.

☐ If possible, be physically active. Walk for 20 minutes, do some yoga, use the exercise bike or go to the gym. Remember that cleaning is a double-duty activity. It's a great way to get you to move. Try to establish a physical routine: depending on your needs, try to stick to a program of one, two, three… or six sessions a week. If you really don't have time, focus on walking to get to and/or come back from work.

☐ Wash yourself. Again, everyone has a different approach to it, depending on their resources and organization. Science recommends taking a shower in the evening, because during the day we accumulate many bacteria, viruses and parasites that affect the regeneration of our skin. During the night, our skin has plenty of time to regenerate. (It is important to remember that taking two showers a day is not recommended: first, because it destabilizes your skin, which has not fully regenerated, second, because it is aggressive for sensitive skins and third, because it is not very nice to Mother Nature.)

☐ Get comfortable. Except for events or evenings when I'm not home alone, I prepare my dinner and enjoy it in my sleepwear.

☐ Prepare a light dinner. Avoid all forms of stimulants such as caffeine, sugar, energy drinks. Try to have an early dinner. I know this is cultural (coming from a family where dinner is served around 8 or 9pm), but a light, early dinner will help you sleep better, have better digestion, boost your metabolism and reduce your blood pressure.

☐ I also use this time to enjoy the presence of my loved ones or to think about calling them, or sending them a message… because they represent a real emotional support for me. Studies have shown that spending time with friends and family contributes greatly to happiness. Among other things, it reduces anxiety, increases productivity and improves mental health.

☐ If you have time, take care of yourself. Follow your skincare routine, even if it's as simple as applying a moisturizer and using deodorant, as it is for me. Remember to brush your teeth. Use slippers at home. Slippers are great for protecting your feet from the cold and keeping your blood flow from slowing down.

☐ Like with my morning routine, I exercise my mind, my faith and/or my creativity for a few minutes. I think it is as important to lighten your mind as it is to exercise it. Here again, I pray for a few minutes. I also write a few notes about my day in my journal. I have developed a sort of obsession with diaries from past centuries and the desire to record intimate details of our lives… and it is true that I harbor the hope that someday I will look back at my writings, much later in life, and find a sort of comforting nostalgy in them. Reading is also one of my favorite hobby. I often fall asleep while reading.

☐ Plan the next day as best you can. I know that some people find it very helpful to prepare their lunch, outfit and/or bag for the next day. This is the time to do what feels right for you. As for me, I just set my alarm clock (If possible, get an alarm clock that is not your phone.)

☐ Determine a time to go to bed and stick to it. If it takes a while to fall asleep (this obviously does not apply to people with sleep disorders...), I invite you to hang out in bed with a book or some relaxing music. I guess I'm pretty harsh, because when this happens, I prefer to condemn myself to boredom, in the dark and in silence. I think it works for me.

ʀᴇᴍɪɴᴅᴇʀ → It takes an average of 66 days to create or change a habit. Don’t give up now!

☐ Wake up at a predetermined time. Set your alarm clock early if you're the type of person who might feel the need to linger in bed for a while before getting up. If possible, get an alarm clock that is not your phone.

☐ Open the curtains and, if possible, air the room for a while, without making the bed yet. According to a study published in 2006 in the journal Experimental and Applied Acarology, making your bed actually creates a comfortable refuge for mites. Researchers at Kingston University's Centre for Immunology in England concluded that putting back the sheets or comforter as soon as you wake up creates an ideal environment for mites to grow. Air the room for a while.

☐ Stay hydrated. Drink water.

☐ If possible, avoid screen time until the end of the list. My mornings allow me to escape social media, messages and demands from work, friends and family. It's a privileged moment in which I avoid any unnecessary anxiety or negative thoughts.

☐ Exercise your mind, your faith, your creativity for a few minutes. For some, it is a combination of meditation and affirmations. As for me, I pray for a moment or two. I also sometimes write a few lines in my journal, although I much prefer to reserve this moment for my evenings. This is the time to get inspired: listen to your favorite podcast, read a little. (Don't start reading new books until you've finished the current one, even if the book is pretty boring.)

☐ Prepare your bag for the day. This is the time to pack your lunch box, your notebooks, your computer for work and all the necessary chargers... I never do it the night before.

☐ Be physically active for at least 30 minutes. If possible, an hour or two. Run, go for a quick walk, stretch, do yoga, use the equipment in your apartment or go to the gym. 

☐ Wash yourself. Everyone has a different approach to it, depending on their resources and organization. Wash up or take a shower or a bath, brush your teeth and floss and if you have one, do your skin care routine.

☐ Get ready for the day. Get dressed and comb your hair even if you don't plan on going out for the day. As someone who has suffered from mental health issues that have kept me in bed for days, getting ready in the morning subconsciously pushes me to offer myself a picture of me ready to face the day. Often, it also encourages me to go out... 

☐ Have a cup of coffee, a cup of tea, a glass of warm water. Try to eat before ingesting any form of caffeine. If possible, eat a full breakfast or a fruit, but never go out on an empty stomach. Again, try to stay hydrated and drink water.

☐ Finish by making your bed. While the study referenced above does not advocate doing this, I find that the discipline and rigor involved in recreating a physically "neutral" environment allows my mind to unburden itself. For the sake of productivity, I suppose. For the same reasons, if possible, never leave your stuff lying around in your room (like letting it pile up on a chair or desk).

☐ Start your day, outside the walls of your precious home.