OUR LOVE STORY

     Ung magigising ka ng alanganing oras tapos ang una mong makikita ay ung mahal mo na natutulog sa tabi mo, haaay it was really one of the happiest moment we shared together. :) 

     May lagnat siya dahil ata sa pagMOA namin at paghiga dun sa bilog na damuhan, ung mahal ko sakitin talaga. It was Thursday when he started having high fever, te mamay keep on updating  me everytime chinicheck ung body temperature niya and I really got so worried that night that I even can't sleep, I know kasi how worried te Mamay is to constantly update me of his condition lalo na pag sinasabi ni te mamay na natatakot na siya kasi super taas ng lagnat niya. Dahil late ako nakauwi nun, I told te mamay na dalaw ako dun kinabukasan after office which I did. At ung mahal ko, ayaw ako pauwiin when I told him I'm going home, it's already late na din kasi but he insists na magstay na daw ako dun at para siyang batang naglalambing na ewan, gusto ko din naman magstay dun para mabantayan siya kaso nahihiya ako, then te mamay told me to spend the night there so ayun nagstay nga ako dun.

     Ung kahit di dirediretso ung tulog ko kasi binabantayan ko siya, ung kahit na kada gising ko ichcheck ko agad kung mainit pa din ba siya tapos aayusin ung towel sa ulo niya o pupunasan siya pag pinapawisan na tapos hahug ulit ako after, ang sarap lang sa feeling na naaalagaan ko siya ng ganun. Tapos may time naman na pagkagising ko and I'm about to get up, di ako makabangon kasi ung kamay niya nakayakap sa likod ko, (padapa kasi ako matulog haha!) Tapos nung umaga na, siya agad ung makikita mo pagbukas pa lang ng mata mo at sabay kayo babangon, priceless. :) 

     Parang kelan lang hindi ako makapaniwalang totoo na lahat nang nangyayari sten, tapos ngayon four months na tayo.  Time really runs so fast when you're having fun and thank you for the happiness from the littlest thing you do up to the surprises you've done, really appreciate everything. For our fourth month, sinurprise mo pa ako ng sundo sa office, kainis ka talaga e haha! Tapos bigla kang bababa ng MOA, ang cute lang nung humiga tayo sa bilog and you initiated taking pictures. ;)  I love everything when I'm with you, ung tipong kahit ordinary lang naman ung nangyari I still feel special just because we're together.  Thank you for making an effort to do little surprises for me, even if I always tell you I hate you for always catching me unprepared, those were really listed on top of the things you do that  I really love the most.   I may not be expressive about it but thank you for all the unexplained emotions you're bringing me. :)

Paano ko ba sisimulan 'to? I just wanna express my gratitude for all your efforts this day. :) Thank you for making me feel special kahit pa sabi mo sa facebook post mo you don't know how and you're not good at it but I'm telling you, you've done a good job. :) And now, I've been celebrating 5 birthdays with you since we became classmates-friends-MU-awkward stage-friends-bestfriends-couple. :) And it wouldn't be a surprise for you that I remember what happened in every year of it.

2011 - Remember when you waited for 12 o'clock of October 12 just to greet me happy birthday, kasi akala mo birthday ko na. (porke 12 favorite kong number e haha) Then the next day, final exam un, nagpunta ka sa school tapos sina DM at Je sabi may ipapakilala daw sila sken then behind them, I saw you walking toward me (slow mo yan haha) tapos nagsmile ka tapos sabi mo happy birthday tapos naglokohan na tayo. :D Tapos kinilig pa mga classmates natin tapos ung iba napatili haha! Un ung first usap natin personally after di tayo maging okay kasi brinoken mo ako :P

2012 - Eto ung kakauwi mo lang from Malaysia, October 17 ka dumating e at winindang mo ako nun. Ung kapatid mo kasi e, tamang ibalita pa sken na bumalik ka na, alam namang in a rel ako nun :D At dahil Friday ang birthday ko nito, Saturday ako nagcelebrate sa inyo together with your family. Un ung niloloko mo pa ako na di ko sinabi sayong may boyfriend ako. haha!

2013 - Tinupad mo ung promise mo sken na sasamahan mo akong magpunta sa Love Radio station to see Papa Jack. Thank you kasi di mo kinalimutan ung promise mo na un kahit February pa natin napag-usapan un at October ang birthday ko. Tapos niloloko pa tayo ni Papa Jack nun, bestfriends lang daw pero magkasama ng anong oras na ng gabi haha! Naligaw tayo nian tapos inabutan na tayo ng birthday ko sa daan tapos kanta lang tayo ng kanta ng happy birthday song. :D

2014 - salubong ng birthday with college friends, xiempre mawawala ka ba naman? haha! Tanda mo ung awkward moment nito? Ung magkasama tayong tatlo ng ex mo, kaya kita di kinakausap nun kasi nagulat ako. Magkasama pala kayo nun, bago di mo man lang sinabi, di tuloy ako nakapagprepare ng mafifeel ko tapos the moment we three met, hinablot mo ung phone ko tapos nagtype ka ng i love you. Muntanga ka nun at oo na aaminin ko nagselos ako nun ewan ba haha! Di naman tayo nun, bestfriend lang naman ako :D Eto din ung unang beses na niyakap mo ako, takenote sa harap ng mga kaibigan natin at kapatid ko. First hug ever haha, natigilan nga ako nung ginawa mo un e pero lam mo na kinilig ako deep inside kahit feeling ko nun that was an apologetic hug kasi may kasalanan ka nun sken, di lang talaga pwede magtampo much nun kasi bestfriend mo lang ako :P

    We started this month na di okay, we had the longest no-talk drama for three days to the point that I thought it's already the end of our relationship. Akala ko kasi kung ano ung nangyari sa mga past rel nia ganun din ung mangyayari smin but I'm wrong and I'm thankful na di umabot sa ganun. It was just comforting to hear the assurance from him. We had fights dahil sa mga pagtatampo ko, ewan ko ba bakit nia natitiis kaartehan ko haha. And also, this month din kami di nagkita ng two weeks which is the longest mula nung maging kami kaya ang ending inaaway ko siya kahit wala naman siyang ginagawang masama, all I know is I miss him to the point of irritating. Nakakainis pag namimiss mo ung tao pero bali-baliktad ung oras niyo, haha! Can't stand missing him.

    On our third month, you know what I did? Nagtampo ako haha! Coz he forgot what he told me last September 19, sabi nia pag wala daw siya pasok iddate nia ako but he never did. I admit, I was disappointed di dahil sa wala siyang ginawa nun pero dahil nakalimutan nia ung sinabi nia. I waited for him to remember it the whole day but I'm wrong and during our convo that night when he told me he missed me, I asked him why he didn't date me? I know upon hearing his voice when he realized that he failed to fulfill what he told me that he feels sorry and guilty for what happened. He got consumed of my coming birthday, super excited siya na halos araw-araw nia binibilang kung ilang araw nalang na nakalimutan niang may monthsary muna kami. :) Ewan ko, maliit na bagay lang naman talaga un but it really meant a lot, I always pay attention to what he says and I'm holding to it like a promise. Siguro naging big deal lang talaga kasi di kami nagkikita na lahat na ata ng pwede ko ikatampo kinatampo ko na. I've been really hard on him, buti nalang natitiis nia ugali ko pag nasasaltik ako.

I dunno how to start this one, ang alam ko lang naiinis ako. It’s disappointing I must say. Maybe it’s also because all my emotions got mixed up. Namimiss kita, sobra, pero naiiyak ako sa thought that I feel like fighting for your time para lang makasama ka. Nakakainis lang na parang kahit ung chance ayaw makisama, may pasurprise surprise ka pang nalalaman kasi, ikaw tuloy ung nasurprise. You know naman na unpredictable ung time ko sa office at alam mo din naman na nagbabaon ako ng lunch pero balak mo pa ako yayain. The worst is, wala akong alam sa mga nangyayari sayo, kelangan mo pang mawrongsend para lang malaman kong nasa byahe ka pala. Feeling ko di mo man lang ako inupdate like I don’t have to know your whereabouts as if I am not your girlfriend. Yan talaga ung nafifeel ko kanina e, ayoko pa naman kasi na nagugulat ako na may di ka sinasabi sken. :( But I understand why you didn’t tell me nung sinabi mong it was supposed to be a surprise but clearly your plan failed. That was really one sweet try, much appreciated. Naiinis lang talaga ako kasi sobrang gusto kita makasama pero wala talaga. Tapos kung kelan uwian na, I tried calling you for so many times pero di ka sumasagot. I was planning na ako nalang pupunta sa may Ayala kasi nga di ka naman daw umuwi. Buong akala ko pa naman umuwi ka, nakakahiya kina te mamay that I have to ask you from her kasi nga I didn’t hear anything from you mula nun. Muka akong tanga kasi, kala ko umuwi ka, tapos nung naconfirm ko nga na di ka umuwi, di ka naman sumasagot sa tawag. I thought you’re sleeping that’s why I stop calling you and just decided to go home. Ewan ko ba, parang ayaw makisama ng tadhana. Then kung kelan nasa byahe na ako saka ka tatawag, tapos hearing your voice that you sounded happy kahit na ganun nangyari, tapos maririnig ko lang sayo nagpunta kayo sa Glorietta then Shaw. That’s why I asked you bakit di ka man lang nagtext, if you have noticed it, coz I wanna know kung naalala mo man lang ba ako nung mga time na yun. Nakakainggit lang na sila kasama mo na di mo man lang ako naisip, when in fact we can spend time together. Parang last week, okay naman ung nangyari di ba? Bakit di mo nalang naisip na ganun nalang ulit. Alam mo ung feeling ko? I feel like you have not considered me kasi you’re having fun with your new friends, nakakainggit lang na kasama ka nila that time na pwede namang sana ako muna ung kasama mo. :(  I’m not asking so much of your time you know that, kahit nga 1 hour lang masaya na ako e pero di nangyari. Pinalampas ko na ung Sunday, pinalampas ko na din ung kahapon kahit alam ko naman na pwede tayo magkita nun, I was about to but I stopped myself kasi gusto ko naman ikaw makaisip nun. Nag-expect lang siguro ako na babawi ka kahapon kasi di ka nakapunta nung Sunday but I was wrong. Nakakalungkot lang kasi this day is the last day this week na pwede tayo magkasama, kasi nga ung sched natin baliktad at di tayo nagkita, meaning Sunday pa ulit kita makikita. 2 weeks? Nakakasaltik talaga ung ganito. I wasn’t sure kung ako lang ba nakakafeel na after what happened, after that 3 days na di tayo okay, we somehow need to make up for the lost time pero parang sayo di naman kailangan un. You’re saying you missed me but it doesn’t look like it was what you’re feeling, sorry. Kasi pag miss mo ung tao you make effort to see them, you make them feel missed and you’ll try to do everything para lang makasama siya. Pero bakit ganun? Pakiramdam ko ako lang ung nakakamiss. Hindi ko na alam, ano2 na nasasabi ko. I just missed you and I feel like we really have to talk personally. Di naman ako magkakaganito kung okay tayo the past few days e, pero kasi hindi :( Kelangan nating bumawi pero parang wala e. Nakakainis ung ganitong pakiramdam, I really wanna see you but it feels like everything isn’t fair this time. Alam mo ung alam ko namang may nagawa sana ako pero lagi nalang may contradiction, this sucks. Sorry for ranting, alam ko naman napapagod ka na dealing with me.Sobrang namimiss na kita, I missed the kind of you you were last week. I’m not liking what’s going on between us. 6 days of October na ganito, nakakaewan lang kasi. Pagaanin mo naman ung loob ko oh? Please.Napapagod na ako magemote kada gabi, napapagod na ako magisip. Nakakastress lang na ganito tayo ngayon. Gusto ko lang naman mafeel na kahit ganito ako, anjan ka pa din para intindihin ako. Pero parang napapagod ka na agad, sorry. I really can’t stand missing you this way.

      “I can’t promise not to make you mad. I can’t promise that I won’t hurt you. All I can promise is that I want you in my life, and I’ll do anything to keep you there.” - Chelsea M. Cameron, My Favorite Mistake

      Sabi nga ng quote: I WILL DO ANYTHING TO KEEP YOU, taga mo yan  sa puso ko! :D Happy 2nd month to us mahal! (lakas maka-pabebe nuh? :P)  10 months pa, anniversary na! haha. Di man tayo nagkasama sa first two monthsaries natin, that’s okay, magsswak din ung schedule natin. :) And it’s not the date that matters, really, okay na ako dun sa thought that you always look forward for our monthsary. Promise napapasmile mo ako dun, ang sweet lang to hear how excited you are, para kang bata kasi pag ganun. :) And now na may work ka na ulit, I know may mga adjustments pang mangyayari sa atin at sabi mo nga let go of my worries na maulit na naman ung nangyari dati kasi this time hinding-hindi mo na ako iiwan and I just want you to know that I’m holding on to your words. I trust you, sobra. Sobrang importante sken ng mga sinasabi mo, kaya thank you for always giving me assurance kapag napaparanoid ako at sana wag kang mapagod intindihin ako kahit tampuhin ako, makulit, moody.

      We’ve known each other for 5 years, have been bestfriends for 3 years and now we’re on our second month of being official, wee! :) We still have a lot of time to fill, di ko alam bakit di ko nafifeel ung sense of urgency, ung parang di ako nagmamadaling makita ung future natin kasi naniniwala akong tayo pa din ang magkasama sa dulo ng lahat ng ‘to. I don’t know if it’s too early to assume or I am being complacent with what we have right now but I do believe and I hope na sana tayo talaga. I know I’ve been telling you this repetitively but I really can’t imagine a future without you and to be honest I love it everytime I hear you say that it’s me you wanna spend your lifetime with. Kinikilig talaga ako, haha! Remember when we’re just bestfriends and you keep on telling me those things? And now that we crossed the bestfriend’s line, pwede ko na panghawakan ung mga sinabi mong un and even without telling you, alam mo naman di ba that I never invisioned myself with anyone else. Kahit nagkaboyfriend ako ng iba dati, hindi ko alam kung bakit but it’s still you, it has always been you. (Pasintabi kay ex haha!)                                          

      Thank you for finally taking the courage to stand for us, thank you for the happiness you’re bringing me (naiiyak tuloy ako kayness!)No matter how afraid I am at first, we both are, ‘coz we both know what’s at stake once we decided to take our frienship to a new level. I am more than thankful having you now not just my bestfriend but my boyfriend as well. I never really imagine na dadating ung time na ganito para sten, that’s why I get emotional everytime na napag-uusapan natin lahat ng nangyari before. Alam mo ung di ko alam kung anong ginawa kong mabuti para ibigay ka sken ni Papa God this time? After everything we’ve been through, eto tayo ngayon, mahal pa din kita at mahal mo na din ako, the feeling is just too overwhelming. Akala ko kasi dati magiging ninang nalang ako ng mga future babies mo e. :P At Alam ko din na uncomfortable ka kapag napag-uusapan natin ung dati, I just want you to know that I am not reminding you how much you had hurt me. I know, kahit di mo sinasabi, a part of you is guilty for hurting me before, but come to think of it, if it’s not because of what happened and what you did, I would never realize that time na mahal kita, na mahal na pala kita. Kasi nung nasaktan mo ako nun, dun ko nafeel na iba pala pag wala ka sa buhay ko. I let you occupy a big part of me kaya siguro ganun nalang ung emptiness when you left. Oo nasaktan ako nun, sobrang sakit talaga kasi nga gago ka nun :P But thank you for those pain kasi kung wala yun, I would never appreciate having the chance of being friends with you again. Sobra kitang mahal that I let you in my life again even if it means being just a friend, di ko alam kung bonus ba or torture kasi naging bestfriends pa tayo. For years, I got contented with it and I must admit it was harder loving you that way. It hurts to be the one listening to your love problems when deep inside I’m wishing it was me. It was hard answering those what ifs for myself, much harder to let go of those silent wishes and little hopes that we can still have the chance to try what must have been years before. Until I got tired of hoping and being left behind, alam mo naman na open tayo sa mga something na nagyari sten di ba? Remember when I told you earlier this year na wag mo na ulit gagawin ung ginawa mo kasi baka sa pangatlong pagkakataon na masaktan mo ako di ko na kayanin? Kinain ko un, kasi tignan mo naman tayo na ngayon. Third time, 3 times na akong nafafall sayo at twice nagmove on at sana tong time na na to, walang third moving on process. :P It was a heartbreak after heartbreak that pushed me to let go of all the little hopes I have for us, napagod akong pagdaanan ng paulit-ulit un, napagod akong marinig sayo na ayaw mo lang irisk ung friendship natin, feeling ko nun maybe I deserve someone at hindi na dapat ikaw un. That maybe our happy ending is us being bestfriends at kung kelan natanggap ko na sa sarili kong hanggang dun lang tayo saka naman bumaliktad ang mundo. Di ko alam kung pinagttripan ba talaga ako ng tadhana or eto ung sinasabi nilang in God’s perfect time, kasi kung kelan binitawan na kita saka mo naman ako hinawakan. And I hated you for making me realize that I never really moved on from that hope, kasi the moment na finally sinabi mong gusto mo ako more than your bestfriend, no matter how I try to deny it to myself, I know deep inside me that it was all I ever wanted to hear from you. (E bakit umiiyak ako while typing this, takte naooverwhelm na naman ako haha!) I tried to fight the urge to come back and surrender, gusto ko kasing mafeel mo kung ano ung pakiramdam na mahal ka pero bestfriend lang ung tingin sayo, but I can’t. Di ko kayang saktan ang sarili ko at lalong di kita kayang saktan. Papa God gave me this once in a lifetime chance and I am not that stupid to blew it away.For years of imagining kung dadating ba ung time na willing ka na to stand for me, na di mo na irereason out ung pagiging bestfriends natin, finally, it was June 23,2015 when you confess at ngayon ko lang aaminin ‘to, umiiyak ako habang kausap kita nun, mixed emotions maybe. Ang weird lang na antagal kong hinintay ung moment na un pero nung anjan na di ko na alam panu magrereact. And just so you know that it’s one of my favorite part of our story, it opened a new chapter for our now so-called LOVE STORY. :)

       Thank you for finally taking the chance and to tell you honestly, you are worth all the risk. Maybe everything that happened before was bound to happen for us to value what we have right now and for us to be willing to surpass the trials that may come along in our relationship. I guess it’s safe to say that in God’s perfect time, ibibigay niya sayo ung love story na di mo makakalimutan and I am a proud recipient of a blessing called you. :)