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[π€] 1/1 [please be aware this is all fiction! none of this is real and idols behavior is not accurately represented.]
song(s): applause - lady gaga | moments in love - charli xcx | paparazzi- lady gaga | old friend - mitski | mean girls - charli xcx | west coast - lana del rey | pink in the night - mitski
summary: getting on the survival show sixteen was really just a way to kickstart your acting career. who wouldβve guessed itβd take such a toll on you?
pairing: momo x actress!reader
tags: not that much angst, happy ending, barely frenemies traumabonded to situationship to kinda friends to lovers, reader is just a little unstable, there is a good amount of fluff though
wc: 9.3k
cw: dieting, mild sexual content, alcohol, cigarettes (smoking), mention of covid, making out (like 4 times)
ex: not beta read, timeline was as accurate as I could make it given the fact that for some reason no one knows where twice was at during november and october of 2017
a/n: is it me if the story doesnβt have either an ed/restriction reference or catholic elements.. I love charli xcxβs music. reader has a βdisgracedβ older sister
you were 17 years old when you were told you made it onto sixteen.
you were a JYP traineeβ not for an idol group, no, for acting. Yet, you were put into singing and dancing classes. It was a bit weird, but as long as you could perform, you didnβt mind.
you did pretty well, actually. You werenβt a top trainee by any meansβ this wasnβt your true passionβ but you were good. You enjoyed dancing, and were pretty talented with hiphop and other less restrictive styles.
your parents had forced you into ballroom, specifically waltzes, even more specifically the Viennese waltz, since you could remember. You were a prim and proper, well-mannered, upper class girl. Perfect for acting, perfect for the silver screen.
Your father was a business magnateβ specifically in transportation. He wasnβt like Samsung, no, but a manufacturer of luxury vehicles. He designed trains, bus systems, even planes, at timeβ he was a talented engineer, of course, but most of the work had now been relegated to employees. When you told him you wanted to be an actor, he didnβt really mind. Your mother didnβt look like she loved the idea, but itβd be good for the family image, so she conceded. After all, youβd succeed, right?
right?
What they didnβt tell you about being on a survival show is how it gets into your head.
you were competitive by nature, fueled by your parents constant reminders you needed to be the best. You were the daughter of a powerful and rich businessman, with his perfect trophy wifeβ their only daughter needed to be perfect, of course.
you played instrumentsβ violin, piano, fluteβ were in extracurricularsβ tennis, skiing, dance, language classesβ had an absolutely pristine record, and perfect grades. You were the poster child of perfection, a face fit for magazines and your family, the girl a mother would tell you to bring home.
But you know, it gets tiring to be so perfect. You hadnβt had any competitionβ until now, that is.
You had never felt more desperate to prove yourself than in that moment.
It was strange, reallyβ you didnβt want to be in an idol group. You had never even considered it. Your passion was acting, it always had been, and it always would be.
but you had never been bad at anything your whole life. Everything you had tried, you had mastered, a desperate fervor to know and prove yourself. But here you were, for once, not the best at somethingβ and it drove you absolutely crazy.
you needed to be the absolute best, the perfect candidateβ the prettiest, the best singer, the best personality, the best dancerβ
you couldnβt, though. and it killed you.
You met Momo when you were 15. It was 2013, some time in the winter, although you couldnβt quite remember. Some people said she looked like you, but you didnβt really see it.
She had been a trainee for longerβ since 2012β you had never really gotten the chance to talk to her, on account of the fact she didnβt speak Korean. Momo was Japanese, same as Sana. They were both close, obviously, and you had noticed they took Korean language classes with a tall Taiwanese girl you never bothered to learn the name of.
There were the trainees everyone knew would debutβ Nayeon, Jihyo, Jeongyeonβ and the trainees people didnβt really speak about.
You were somewhere in the middle. You had a lot of skills, both in instruments, languages, sports, and acting, but you werenβt a top trainee by any means. You stayed comfortably in the upper middle, a chance at debut but not too high, not too low to be kicked out, either.
You could dance well, of course, although you sometimes felt a burning pang of jealousy watching Momo dance. She was good at it, unreasonably so. It came so naturally to her. Like she didnβt even have to think about it.
and she was pretty, too. long black hair, black eyes you could drown in. You didnβt to stare too long. She was just.. noticeable. Itβs not like she ever noticed. When she was dancing, the only thing that mattered was her reflection in the practice room mirror. Her friend, Sana, would glance at you once or twice, whenever you stared.
She knew.
you never noticed.
Practicing for the competition was obviously stressful, but nothing you couldnβt handle. You were determined, strong, not weak. You learned English, Japanese, played the piano, violin, you had kind of forgotten the flute but you could, onceβ you had skied since you were four, played tennis at sixβ you didnβt know, yet, but you would graduate high-school as valedictorian, taking the maximum amount of APβs for the last four years.
Youβd practice till you got a move, perfectly. You were the first to enter the practice room and the last to leave.
you know, contrary to what youβd think, your fatherβs money isnβt what got you into JYP, or their idol program, or SIXTEENβ well, maybe it played a part into getting you into JYP, but the rest was all you. All your βfriendsβ, other kids you knew, same or richer than you, spent their time partying, shopping, crashing cars and drinking.
some, of course, worked like you. There were parents who didnβt care what their kids did, and parents who needed their children to be the paragons of perfection. Usually, the more high-class your parents were, the more in the public eye they were. Korean standards were strict, and if you didnβt mean it, youβd watch your family apologize for you on public television, renounce your name, and at times, wipe you from the will. Most kids got a pass, their parents pulled some strings, and they were free. But others? Well, the kids that were forced to work hard were usually the ones who had to pay a price.
you would not be disgraced like your sister. She lived in America, now, and you hadnβt contacted her in two years. Not like you missed her. Not like you counted.
βMomo, have you noticed that rich girl staring at you?β The dyed-brown haired girl questioned, twirling a pen in their shared dorm.
βWhat rich girl?β The long haired girl blinked, black hair dyed close to the same shade of her friend.
βThe one sitting across from us? The one that the instructor always says you kind of look like,β she reminded, unimpressed, gesturing at her subtly with the pen.
βWhy would she stare at me? Sheβs the daughter of some famous Korean businessman, weβre two random Japanese trainees,β Momo pointed out, causing Sana sigh and lean in a little closer.
βMomo, thatβs not what Iβm talking about! Even before she got moved to this dorm, sheβs always looking at you. Maybe sheβs jealous, you two are always getting compared to each other, after all, and I bet she feels threatened-β She rephrased, Momoβs eyes widening before she cut her off.
βSana! Quiet down! She could hear you!β
βSheβs Korean, Momo, sheβs not going to know Japanese, let alone a dialect,β she pointed out, crossing her arms, flicking Momo on the forehead with an amused smile. βYou know, Iβm starting to think that time you hit your head really did have an effect on y-!β
βActually, Iβm fluent in both Japanese and English,β a cold voice piped up. βI donβt speak the dialects, but theyβre understandable,β you added, shifting on the bunk-bed to rest on your hands, a carefully blank look on your face.
Sana turned to you in shock and embarrassment, and Momo pointed at her childishly, exclaiming, βI told you so!β
Sana and Momo had only been in Korea for about a year, at that point, and their Korean wasnβt exactly great.
βAh.. Iβm sorry..β Sana began, slowly, in Korean.
βI just told you, I speak Japanese. You donβt have to speak in Korean. Thatβs why they placed me here, though. To help you two with your Korean,β you informed, pronunciation sharp and undeniably the standard Tokyo-way of speaking.
βRight.. Iβm sorry for talking about you,β Sana began, again, feeling a little humiliated, which made her a bit annoyed. She wasnβt a gossip or anything, you just stared at Momo a lot. It was noticeable. You two were constantly being compared to each other for your similarities in looks, after all.
βItβs fine,β you dismissed, with a wave of your hand. βIβm sure it seems like I stare a lot, but itβs just because I like to analyze the competition, not because Iβm jealous of.. well, you two,β you voiced, regarding them both with an amused smile.
To be completely transparent, you were a little jealous of Momo. She was an absolutely amazing dancer. But of course, no one had to know that.
βYou know weβre going to be on a survival show, donβt you?β you asked, with a tilted head and pointed stare.
βWell, yeah, we know.. but why am I competition?β Momo blinked, pointing at herself.
You let out a sharp, pointed laugh, almost in disbelief.
βYouβre not a bad dancer, and donβt rank too low, either. Itβs a seven member group. Thereβs not a lot of room to be mediocre,β your words were calculated, given sharply, seriousness gracing your words.
Momo frowned, mood souring slightly at your clipped, dismissive tone. She didnβt notice, though, how serious you seemedβ how some cutthroat ideology laced your words.
Sana did, though. As much as Sana presented herself as an airhead, she was unbelievably smartβ especially with people. She knew intentions, how to talk to people, how to get what she wanted with words. You knew this, and recognized her for what she wasβ a clever, determined, but kind girl. Sheβd do what she needed to do to get what she wanted, of course, but sheβd try to help you along as far as she could. It wasnβt clear to you, yet, if sheβd give up her space to let someone else take it.
You werenβt sure youβd ever know.
βAnyway, I have some essays to finish. Iβll graduate this year,β you added, breaking the tension, laying on your bed and taking out your school laptop, beginning to write.
The two Japanese girls stared, dumbfounded, and quietly slinked out of the room after a few minutes. It was too awkward, and you seemed so unbothered, unflappable after that little displayβ some of the other trainees were intimidated by you, whispers of how you were only in this program to βchallengeβ yourself, or that it was sure youβd debut because of your father, or talents, or how you were the smartest traineeβ all rumors, all untrue. You were placed here for a reason unknown to you, and didnβt even rank particularly high at the moment. You were slowly climbing the ranks, though, and had sat comfortably in fifth place by the time SIXTEEN started.
Although, youβre sure all those people who whispered about you in the halls would be shocked to learn that youβd never end up debuting in the nationβs girl group. A successful actress, of course, but an idol? That wasnβt your fate to have.
Right at the end of June, falling into early April is when filming began.
Your life became practicing, training, working out, practicing, showcasing, and only barely sleeping.
You were still in a dorm with Sana and Momo, although a fourth girlβ Chaeyeonβ happened to be there as well.
She was the first to be eliminated, though, and it was just you three again.
Sana and Momo had gotten very close with another, younger Japanese trainee named Mina. Mina was very pretty, and had done ballet, and you could already just feel she would debut.
You liked Mina. She was probably who you were closest with. She grew up pretty well off, as well, and did ballet. You could relate to her, and she was the only one youβd keep in touch with after the show.
It was getting harder and harder to believe youβd debut.
Nayeon and Jeongyeon would definitely debutβ Mina would, too, along with probably Momo and Sana. Dahyun was really popular, as well as Tzuyu, and there were only seven spots. Jihyo was too good of a singer to be sure what the final lineup would be, and Chaeyoung would be a good rapperβ it was all so confusing. It made you all the more desperate to prove yourself wrong, though, because a part of you knew, deep down, you wouldnβt debut.
A week before the first day of filming, you had snuck out to the convenience store. It was dark, late at nightβ you had a craving. Your father smoked cigars, your mother drank vodka and whiskeyβ not mixed, of course.
you were just scraping 18, now, having graduated in February. You couldnβt legally have a drink, or even smoke till 19, but a part of you itched to try it, curious.
obviously, you werenβt going to risk ruining your image. You loitered around the store, scanning the aisles, but ultimately not buying anything, unable to find something worth possibly gaining weight for.
the managers had been particularly strict before the start of the show.
you went back to your dorm, still restless, and exhausted at the same time.
the life of a trainee was draining.
When SIXTEEN began, everything shifted.
You and Momo were still dorming together, but Sana was moved with Mina and there were a lot of other changes.
you were becoming antsy and restless. Watching people get eliminated was taking a toll on you. You ate less, slept less, practiced moreβ it was getting to you.
momo had begun eating less. a lot less. You couldnβt afford to be worried, you had to focus on yourself.
What no one would tell you about a survival show is that bonds are fickle. You wanted to care about other people, but once you had gotten a taste of the applause, the fans, all the love that came with being in the spotlightβ you got hooked.
you were popular among the fans, your skills werenβt bad, maybe you could really debut. It started worming itβs way into your head.
the hunger and exhaustion was making everyone a bit volatile, a bit too confrontationalβ you were guilty of it, too.
you refused to build any friendships, while you were there, but built a very strong rivalry with Momo.
Everything she did, you did, trying to do it better.
Youβd practice at the same time, next to each other, giving backhanded compliments on form and criticism to each otherβs footwork and lines
Youβd try your best to outdo each other, fueled by the constant comparison and the fact that you two were almost never on the same team together.
but when Momo was eliminated, you felt your heart drop.
you told yourself it was good, less competition that way. But a part of you felt.. empty.
you practiced, going through the motions, but it felt wrong. It was all robotic. There was no passion or emotion, and for that, you were eliminated the ninth episode, along with another girl.
from there, you threw yourself back into acting. You made your acting debut about a year later, months after Twice had debuted.
no one would ever know, though, that you had watched of the rest of the episodes, and congratulated Mina on her debut, telling her you were happy the three of them (Mina, Sana, Momo) would get to debut together. You debated on telling Momo yourself, maybe heading to the practice rooms to do so, out of begrudging respect and happiness, but you never did.
and so began the next nine years.
year 1; mid-May, 2016 | Korea
you had just exited the JYP building, into the cool night of the city after light rainfall. May wasnβt ever too hot, an easy 70 degrees out. It was a bit cold, but that was nothing. It was maybe thirty minutes to twelve, the city sparkling like the stars that were drowned out by smoke and light pollution.
You leaned on the building, debating on whether or not to go out to eat or just go straight home. You were pushed out of your thoughts when you heard the doors open and close, glancing at the person exiting the building.
Momo. Hirai Momo, with light caramel hair, now, looking tired, in some casual practice outfit thrown together hastily.
she still looked good.
her eyes were dark, glancing at some message on her phone. The bright white light illuminated her face, and you were about to quietly slink away when you both made eye contact.
βMomo,β you began, always eager to get the first word in, but not sure what to say.
She stared at you, obviously recognizing you. βY/n,β she greeted. βI heard youβve made your acting debut. Congratulations,β she offered, and the Korean off her tongue didnβt sound exactly right to you.
βThank you,β you murmured. βI saw that you debuted. The song was good. Congratulations,β was your reply, tone polite. Momo knew that you and Mina still spoke, even going out to eat together whenever you both had the time, which wasnβt often.
βThank you,β she replied back, and you hated how awkward everything felt.
βWell, Iβm gonna g-β
βDo you want to come with me to the convenience store?β Momo asked, suddenly, immediately backtracking when your words registered. βIf you have to go then go, donβt worry about it, nevermind,β
βIβll go,β you agreed, not entirely sure why you did. βI havenβt eaten yet, anyway,β
the two of your walked a bit far off, entering the convenience store with a little chime and feeling the need to make conversation.
βSo.. Momo, why are you practicing so late?β You asked, conversationally.
βWe have so many albums and songs lined up, for this year.. weβre working on one right now. Iβm sure Minaβs told you,β she murmured, voice low so as to not disturb anyone.
βSheβs mentioned that youβre all.. busy,β you agreed, and you noticed how she looked thinner, more tired, somehow older in the span of a year.
she was still beautiful, of course, but youβve been seeing beautiful people your whole life.
βIs it what you wanted?β You asked, forced lightness in your voice, though it mightβve come out more accusing than you wanted. It wasnβt her fault you got eliminated. Kind of.
She looked at you for a long time, fingers ghosting over some matcha candy you couldnβt name, parts of a life you probably wouldnβt ever see.
βI think it will be,β she replied, looking at the selection of green, instead of at you.
the night was warmer on the walk back to your dorm. A grassy, slightly bitter taste sat comfortably in your mouth.
youβd have to start drinking matcha, more.
year 2; early November, 2017 | Korea
Likey had just dropped, and signal had won Twice international success. They were pushing Japan, doing promotions there so constantly you had half a mind to just ask them why they wouldnβt move there, and a nomination to the Korean Popular Culture and Arts Awards.
you were there too, of course, for your roles in a myriad of dramas, at that point.
You had been the lead role in βStrong girl Bonsoonβ and βMy Ghostβ respectively.
You were young, yes, 19, almost 20, nowβ but you had achieved amazing successes, just like the girls you sat near, now.
there was a reason there were almost no pictures of twice at the awards, and you couldnβt find their speeches.
You won, not unsurprisingly, as did Twice, and sat through the performances. You spoke to Mina, easily, but she went to go talk to Jihyo about something, at one point, and you couldnβt really remember or careβ both you and Momo could drink now, and they were giving out free champagne.
as the performances closed, everyone had received their awardsβ you headed to the bathrooms. They were empty, and you stared at yourself in the mirror. Face flushed, hair and makeup still intact, though, black silk dress unmarred by any stains, something youβd bought just to prove to yourself you made it, had your own money now, didnβt need your parentsβ
the door opened, and Momo appeared inside. It took one glance and the sound of a lock clicking before her lips were on yours.
she tasted like good alcohol and something sweet, your hands in her perfectly styled hair. She pressed you against the wall, your pretty and pink lipstick mixing with her darker one, pulling apart after nearly a minute and a half, panting, your eyes dazed and dilated.
βyou have an apartment now, right?β she murmured, breathless.
you did have an apartment, bought the second you turned 19, trying to prove you didnβt need your parents, still. You had made it, for fucks sake.
βI do,β you answered, and you both managed to make it there without any cameras flashing.
your apartment was near the Han river, a testament to your success. It was small, one bedroom, with a large-enough kitchen and spacious living room, large windows that let the city lights in.
the apartment was bathed in a cool, blue glow, by both the night sky, and the building outside the window.
You and Momo had stumbled into the space, hurriedly locking the door without breaking the kiss, barely making it to the bedroom. The apartment had large, wide windows, taking up nearly the entire wall. There were curtains, of course, but they were a bit sheer, and white. The lights of the city illuminated the dark room, letting your fingers fumble with the zipper of Momoβs dress, getting it off.
Her hair was mussed, and you were sure yours was the same, but you didnβt care, right now.
Lipstick stains adorned her mouth, the two of you having created a muted, glossy color, that would later become a favorite, then something you hated, to something youβd think about, fondly.
She took off your dress, carefullyβ it was Dolce and Gabbanaβ although hers was much the same, in the sense that it mustβve been designer, as well, although you didnβt bother to check the tag.
Both articles of clothing ended up sprawled on the wooden floor, anyway, forgotten.
you kissed her desperately, the two of you thoroughly lost in each other.
your skin burned, her hands feeling too hot, your brain slowly melting away every other worry other than her.
to be honest, you were a little too drunk to remember everything that had happened.
you kind of wished you did.
Waking up the next day at four thirty in the morning was rough. Running on two and a half hours of sleep, you groaned when you heard Momoβs alarm go off.
she didnβt wake, though, you had turned it off fairly quickly, and the alcohol mixed with the sexβ the word left a bitter taste in your mouth, for some reasonβ had knocked her out cold.
you watched her, for a bit. Hirai Momo was beautiful, youβd always known that. You never really realized it till now, though. Soft, short brown hair, dyed, a peaceful expression, smooth skin bathed by cold light, in a mostly white space.
your apartment was sparsely decorated, feeling more like a museum than a home. You didnβt even call it home, just βthe houseβ or βthe apartmentβ. There wasnβt any life to it. It wasnβt a place to get attached to.
You contemplated waking her up. You didnβt really want to, but you knew you had to.
βMomo,β you murmured, placing a hand on her shoulder, shaking her. βMomo, you have to wake up,β
She groaned, turning, screwing her eyes shut. βNo.. Iβm tired,β was her muttered response, and you could barely even tell if she was speaking korean or japanese (it was japanese, she had only been in korea five years at that point. thatβs not enough time to completely switch languages).
βMomo, your alarm went off, you need to get up,β you urged, speaking in japanese in hopes itβd get through her head, better.
She let out a sound of protest, but opened her eyes, sitting up. βWhat time is it?β She muttered, running a hand through her hair. The both of you werenβt wearing clothes, obviously, but the sight of her was still a little much for so early in the morning.
βItβs fifteen minutes to five,β you informed.
βI have to be at Inkigayo at five thirty,β she exclaimed, eyes widening. βOh god,β she cursed, under her breath, distressed.
βLook, you can borrow some of my clothes. No oneβs gonna know itβs mine,β you muttered. βYou can keep it, so we never get caught for sharing clothes. Plus, the worst that could happen is we say you slept over because I invited you to go eat, or something.. it doesnβt matter, weβre two girls anyway,β you explained.
Momo stared at you, dumbfounded, still processing the words that came out of your mouth before agreeing. βOkay, yeah.. can I use your shower?β
βSure,β you shrugged, trying to be nonchalant when she was naked in your bed, and looked too fucking good for having just woken up. Fuck those instructors, you definitely did not look like Hirai Momo. You wished you did.
you handed her a simple pair of pink sweatpants and a dark red hoodie. They werenβt things you had actually worn, yet, just thought they were cute. Momo wasnβt too far from your height, anyway, so they fit fine.
She showered, changed, and it wasnβt that long of a drive to Inkigayo, and a taxi could probably get her there in fifteen minutes.
it was 5:15, now, and she was drying her hair on the balcony. You had also gifted her a pair of white sneakers, to complete the outfit. It fit their concept, anyway.
you were on the balcony, too, watching the sunrise with a Bohem Cigar Shake hanging out of your mouth, lit.
Momo didnβt smoke, you had learned when you offered her one. She didnβt like the smell.
truth be told, you werenβt the biggest fan, but these were sweet, they left an aftertaste in your mouth a lot of people hated, but you kinda liked it.
You put it out on an ashtray once you accidentally burnt your finger tip, sucking on the mark and snubbing the cigarette out with your other hand.
Momo gave you a slightly concerned look, but you assured her you were fine.
she left in your clothes (no one would ever know, just you and her members) into a taxi you paid for, to perform at a music show youβd watch.
you and momo met on and off for the rest of that year, between promotions and award shows and restaurants and going shopping with Mina and taking pictures together and her visiting you on setβ
the public called you great friends.
at least they didnβt see where her hands tended to rest.
year 3; mid-February, 2018 | Japan
you were 20, officially.
Twice had begun their Japanese tour, releasing Candy Pop a week into February.
the 14th was the Gaon chart music awards, which twice attended, of course.
you were still filming some dramas in Korea, but had managed to get time off to go to Japan. For no other reason than the fact Japan was beautiful in February, of course. Itβs not like you attended the Gaon chart music awards to see Momoβ no, Sunmi had released some good music, too, and of course you were friendly with all of twice.
the after parties for the awards were always fun.
βMomo, wait,β you murmured, breathily, pressed up against some wall in the buildings seemingly-millions of bathrooms.
βWhat?β she blinked, deep brown eyes blown wide, staring deep into your own.
βI didnβt.. itβs. I got you something,β you admitted, quietly. You handed her a small, dark red box, that you had kept in the small black bag you had taken.
you were wearing 2017 MiuMiu, a black minidress that your stylist had complemented with pearls and silver, tightening the waist and removing some of the collar. What was left was a striking black dress, soft fabric, and a lower neckline, paired with, of course, a vintage black MiuMiu leather handbag.
βOpen it,β you instructed, to which the other girl did, to reveal two Mikimoto pearl earrings, having 18kt gold yellow gold posts. You had found it at an auction, they werenβt relatively expensiveβ $500β and from ten years prior. You thought theyβd suit her, and so you bought it.
she just stared at you, a bit surprised, dumbfoundedβ
βWhyβd you get me this?β were the words that slipped out from her mouth. She had the same shade of lipstick on, this time liquid, and your lips were colored with a pink gloss, girlish.
βDonβt you know what day it is?β You laughed, amused, tilting your head. βItβs the fourteenth of February,β
βYou got me a gift for valentines?β She clarified, slowly, recoiling, a grimace slowly morphing onto her face.
you noticed, of course.
βNo,β you lied, easily. βFor the win,β
you both knew it wasnβt true, but allowed yourselves to indulge in the lie just a little more.
you two were just high off the high-life, making it big for the first times in your life.
momo left your hotel room before you saw her in the morning.
you knew there was no concert the fifteenth of February. momo was a horrible liar, but you knew, later, from photos, they were in an airport that day.
you never asked to where.
(It wasnβt a question, but she did send you a silver-chain necklace, a pearl-heart pendant, march 14th. you hadnβt taken it off)
year 4; early August, 2019 | Korea
you were nearly 21, now.
βMomo, who the fuck is Heechul?β you spat, looking at a news article. The girl, who now had black wavy hair, a little lower than her shoulder, was currently lounging in your bed. Promotions for Dance the Night Away had just started, and she looked better than ever.
Her eyes widened, and she sat up, looking hurt and a little panicked. You never spoke to her like this, not since Sixteen, and you both rarely spoke in Korean, anymore.
βWhat do you mean? Heβs just a friend-β
βDonβt lie to me,β you cut in, sharply. βYouβve been acting weird ever since I gave you those earrings, Momo. Why?β you demanded, the anger masking all the hurt you felt.
she was silent, for a bit, drawing into herself, looking to the side and holding her arms.
βWe canβt be anything more than this,β she murmured.
βWhat?β
βI have a career. I have a group, I canβt just.. leave it all,β
βWhat are you talking about?β You asked, a little high pitched.
βWe should stop. You.. you like me too much,β she decided. βItβs safer if Iβm.. you know, with a guy. It wonβt be favorable, but itβll get people off us both. People talk too much, nowadays,β she continued.
βI mean.. itβs just that.. you know, weβre both girls. Thatβll ruin both of our careers. And I like being an idol. I wonβt.. I wonβt just give it up,β
βMomo, are you serious?β You exclaimed, shocked. βYouβre refusing to see me, when weβve been pretending to be just friends for over three years now, and instead.. youβre gonna date some guy? Momo, that could ruin your career, too! No one knows about us, I havenβt told anyone! Why are you being so-β
βIt wonβt be as bad as if it were us two,β she reminded, pointedly and acidly. βNot all of us have a rich family to fall back on. I had to work to get here. I will not give it all up just because you want to.. to play around, and pretend weβre in love!β She cried, aggravated.
you stared in shock. You didnβt even know what to say, the whole reason you refused to use your parents was your desperation to be independent from them.
you knew what theyβd do to you if they found out what you were.
you didnβt want to have to rely on them, in case they ever found out.
you didnβt want to be like your sister.
βThatβs not fair, Momo. You donβt-β
βI do!β She shot back. βI do, this is fair! This is my life, this is my career, you donβt get to tell me what I should do! Just- god!β She shouted, throwing her hands in the air, collecting her things. She got dressed, fixed her hair quickly into a bun, and stormed out of your apartment.
βDonβt contact me again,β were her low, parting words.
year 5; early January, 2020 | Korea
you had just turned 21 a little bit ago.
the rest of 2019 had been absolute hell. you saw Momo everywhere you wentβ on advertisements, on tv, heard her on the radio.
and now, New Yearβs Day, it was confirmed that she was dating Heechul.
you were in your apartment, still mostly empty save for a few things you had bought for herβ like a tea kettle, an assortment of matcha flavored snacks, a second toothbrushβ
everything hurt.
you did the only thing you could think to do.
you called your sister.
it was eleven something in the morning in New York, sheβd have to pick up.
βHello? Y/n, why the hell are you calling m-β
she was cut off by the sound of a choked sob, more like a hacking, and a shaky inhale.
βI get it now,β were your broken, pained words. βI fucking get it now,β
βOh, y/n,β she murmured, quietly.
βIβm so sorry,β
10 years prior; late September, 2010 | Korea
βIβm gay. I have a girlfriend,β were the earth-shattering words your sister, freshly 18, had dropped on the shoulders of you and your parents in the middle of a family dinner.
βYouβre what?β Your mother asked, slowly, giving her time to play it off. She stood, steadfast.
βIβm gay. I have a girlfriend,β she repeated, clearly.
Your father and mother stared at her, for a long while. You didnβt really know what would happen, yetβ you had never heard your parents even mention their opinion on homosexuality, but thereβs no way theyβd care, right? It didnβt really matter-
βGet out,β were your fathers cold, flat words.
your sister nodded, once, clenching her jaw. She packed her things, appearing back downstairs within twenty minutes.
(she had already packed the day prior. She knew how this would go).
βWait, why does she have to leave? I donβt-β
βSheβs not your sister anymore,β your mother informed, curtly.
βSheβs not apart of this family anymore,β your dad restated.
βBut.. why?β You asked, barely 13.
βItβs unnatural, and bad for the family image. Itβs not good for us,β
you didnβt really think that was enough reason to kick a child out. But you couldnβt argue.
your sister left, that day, passing you her number secretly.
you didnβt have a bad relationship with your sister.
but for a few years, you refused to talk to her. You would not disgrace the family, you would not give up everythingβ
you just couldnβt understand why she give up a cushy life of luxury to go to school in New York, all for some girl.
βYouβll understand when your older,β sheβd tell you, quietly, over the phone, when you both still got the chance to talkβ before you had become paranoid of getting kicked out, like her.
βOne day, youβll meet someone youβll love. Youβll love them, to the point that nothing matters as long as youβre together,β
βI donβt think I will,β youβd reply, so sure. βThatβs stupid,β
βIt is, isnβt it?β Sheβd laugh.
βYouβll get it, though, one day,β
you had flown to America, right in the beginning of 2020.
you went to New York, to live with your sister for a bitβ you just needed to be around familyβ family that wasnβt your parents.
you got an offer to shoot a drama there, anyway.
you had no idea youβd end up stuck in america for nearly a year, due to Covid.
whatever, youβd think.
not like youβd have anyone to come back to in Korea.
In America, you were more free.
no one particularly cared what anyone was doingβ you couldnβt go out, and you were alone in the apartment you had rented.
your sister would come over with her girlfriendβ now, wife, because you could get married, hereβ sometimes, but not often.
you smoked camels, now, unfiltered, by the balcony, overlooking a city so much the same and too different.
you texted Mina, a lot. She kept you updated.
you both made a point not to talk about Momo.
the necklace Momo had gifted you was left in your jewelry box in korea.
the house was a perfect snapshot of your life, then, untouched by changes.
it was a picture frozen in time.
god, fuck this place.
year 6; late June, 2021 | Japan
you were 22, now, having made it back to Korea in late may after finishing your drama, finally getting everything together and back to your apartment in early June. Your return was publicized, there were a few people who still came to the airport even with all the restrictions, but you had made it back to your country.
it had really helped, to get it all out, put everything in perspective.
you still smoked camels, now you drank tequilaβ the remnants were mementos of a life most people wouldnβt see.
you flew to Japan, thoughβ you had the prospect of an ambassadorship, and they wanted you to fly over, for some reason.
you messaged Mina about itβ maybe you two could meet up, go eat. you hadnβt seen her in a while.
you spoke, gave her your hotel and room number, and you both agreed to see if you could schedule it.
the next day after you'd messaged her, there was a knock on your door.
you thought itβd be Mina.
Momo had shorter black hair now. It suited her.
Momo had hurt you.
you cried for at least three weeks. She seemed happy enough when you saw her through a screen. she was still with Heechul. She shouldnβt be here.
you opened the door.
momoβs eyes were watery, and she looked up at you, pleadingly.
βY/n,β she began, voice shaky.
βWhat do you want?β You snapped, even though you didnβt really mean to.
βWe broke up,β were her words. You stopped, for a second. You knew what this was. You were her rebound.
βI-β
βWhen I saw you came back, I couldnβt take it anymore. Iβm sorry. Iβm so sorry, y/n,β she murmured, crying now. βI didnβt want- I- I just.. I was so scared. But, I just- I canβt- itβs been too long. I canβt keep going without you, I need you, I..β
you pulled her inside, shutting the door, locking it, and pressing her against it. You hadnβt forgotten how her hair felt in your hands, soft and silky, how she always tasted a bit sweet.
people said she was a peach, but she didnβt exactly taste like it.
except for when she wore the peach lipgloss you got her, one time, as a joke.
she ran a hand through your hair, tugging on the strands, pulling you closer. god, she kind of reminded you of herself.
her tears made the kiss taste salty.
this time was different. it was not slow, it had no love in it. she had hurt you, she had left you, and now she was crawling back.
you left marks where no one but her would see. you ran your teeth over her pulse point, but never bit down.
your kisses were bruising and filled with anger and resentment.
this was a bad idea.
this was always going to be a bad idea.
it was only around 11 when you had both felt too tired, resigning yourself to sleep.
momo had hated sleeping alone, without you.
she pressed her face into your neck, eyes screwed shut. you felt a little bad, despite yourself. you had been a bit mean..
βMomo, go to sleep,β you spoke, softly, carding a hand through her short black hair.
βIβm sorry,β she whispered. βIβm sorry for leaving. please donβt-β
βItβs okay,β you interjected, because you really didnβt want to have to hear the rest of her words. βI donβt have a schedule tomorrow, anyway,β which was not true, you had to go discuss the drama you were shooting at one in the afternoon, but you werenβt telling her that.
they werenβt the exact words she wanted to hear, but they were as close as you could get, right now.
you ran a hand through her hair, as her arm stayed around your waist. she was clinging onto you, like youβd disappear.
you probably should, to get back at her, but you couldnβt bring yourself to quit.
momo was kind of like every bad habit you couldnβt quitβ smoking, drinkingβ they werenβt good for you, but they made you feel better.
she was addictive, like that.
but here, in your hotel room bed, kind of like last place you saw her, now the first time youβve seen her in almost a year and a halfβ
she kind of seemed like something you really couldnβt live without.
July 8th, 2021 | Japan
they had flown back to Korea the day prior. You were still in Japan, when you saw the article.
momo and heechul had finally announced their break up to the public.
good, you thought.
you had gone out to eat with Mina a week ago, you both talked about your livesβ work, vacations, how busy you both were. you asked about her members.
July 1st, 2021
βHow is everyone?β you asked, with a tilted head.
βEveryoneβs good, Iβm happy weβre back in Japan, I got to see my parents, so did Sana, so did..β
βyou can say her name, you know,β you muttered.
βListen, y/n, Iβve tried not to get involved, but this isnβt good for you two. After you left, Momo could barely sleep. She ate less, too, and she still had to go on dates with Heechul to make it look real. She didnβt even really want to date him, she was just-β
βI know, Mina. But- you know, itβs not up to me. Sheβs too scared to be with me. She doesnβt really love me,β you chuckled, though it was more bitter than amused.
βI think she does,β she replied. βI just donβt think sheβs realized it yet,β
year 7; late May, 2022 | Korea
βMomo!β you called, just a few months into being 23.
you had decided to pick up Momo from the airport.
now, fans would never know, but you just really wanted to see her.
she had been in the U.S. for months, now, touring, and you had missed her.
even with all your miscommunication you both still met up, sometimesβ you visited your sister as an excuse when they held their concert in New York City.
you did meet with Momo, after the show.
βHow was America?β You asked, in english, as she got into the car. She looked tired, her hair now ash-blue and a little longer.
βGood,β was her response, a tired smile under the mask.
she coughed, and you glanced at her, a bit worried.
βNayeon and Tzuyu are sick, too,β she mumbled. βCan you take me to the apartment?β
and so you did, the apartment she shared with Nayeon. You helped her with the luggage, and you tried to kiss her but she moved her faceβ she didnβt want you sick.
Nayeon, Momo, and Tzuyu all tested positive for Covid-19 the following day.
To no oneβs surprise, you tested positive for Covid as well, but with very mild symptoms that felt more like an annoying cold.
you obviously couldnβt go to any filmings or schedules, and Mina ended up positive tooβ
so you drove to Momoβs apartment with soup. Like a lovesick idiot.
Nayeon let you in, and you knew better than to not bring her some soup as well. You handed it to her, and went straight to Momoβs room.
she looked.. sick. coughing, exhausted, you were sure she was achey and had a headache.
her fever wasnβt too bad, on account of all the medication she was taking.
βMomo?β you called, running a hand through the girls hair. βI made you soup,β
she sat up, blearily, looking a little hazy.
βIβll get you sick,β she mumbled.
βIβm already sick, donβt worry,β you assured.
you fed her the soup, because you were that painfully whipped, talking quietly about what you had been doing since they went on tour.
you made her take some Tylenol, because her face felt hotter when you put the back of your hand to her forehead.
you got up to leave, but she grabbed your hand, tugging you back like a child.
βcan you stay?β she mumbled, looking at you pleadingly.
you would never say no, of course.
itβs not like you had something better to do.
for the rest of the time you were sick, you would visit Momo, watch dramas with her, sleep in her bed, next to herβ you both acted so much like a couple Nayeon pulled you aside after almost a week.
βY/n, I donβt know how long this thing with Momo has been going on, exactly, but it looks like you make her happy, so.. thank you. Itβs been a lot, lately, with touring and Heechul.. take care of her, okay?β
she walked off before you could explain that, no, you two werenβt dating, and you were scared that if you asked her to date you sheβd run away again.
you had to go shoot some drama, again, even if you really didnβt want to, after you tested negative.
you both got busy, after that. Especially youβ you had so many dramas to film.
February 8th, 2022
@OT9TRANS β¦ BUBBLE MESSAGE
ππ¬ 220208
MM: I have watched Call, watched Burning, watched Nothing Serious, and Money Heist. I have watched them allπ« β€οΈ
MM: i really like y/n l/n nim β‘ Sheβs my style π«£
year 8; early January, 2023 | Korea
it was your 24th birthday partyβ you had turned 24 in winter of last year, but this was the only day you could make it work, because Twice had another tour starting in February.
You invited them, all 9, to noraebangβ karaoke. obviously, some of your own friends came, too. You had made a lot of friends in the industry after so many years.
Momoβs hair was still black, grown out a bit more, but not as long.
you all sang and drankβ Nayeon, particularly, having a good time singing every Twice song she could.
you sat next to Momo, pleasantly tipsy, and everything felt warm.
it was a little crowded, but you had rented a bigger space than normal. It was dim, the only lights coming from the screen in front of you.
after a little bit, you slipped outside. The place you rented had a rooftop, and you planned to make full use of it.
The skyline had changed from 8 years prior. It used to have less buildings, smaller skyscrapersβ now it almost seemed as if the blue and red lights of the city were truly the stars in the sky.
You lit up a cigarette, this time, Cheyenne peach, and took a drag.
you heard a metal door open and shut.
Momo sat down next to you, and you offered her a drag.
she wrinkled her nose.
βThey smell, y/n, why do you still smoke them?β
βJust a bad habit, I guess,β you shrugged.
she plucked it out of your mouth, tossing it to the side.
βItβs bad for you,β she chided.
how ironic, for her to say that.
βThereβs a lot of things that are bad for me that I still do,β you replied, quietly.
she was silent, for a second.
she held your face, pulling you closer. She tasted like soju, which is to say smooth alcohol, of which youβve been drinking the whole night.
it was sweeter than usual, because you canβt stand bitter tastes, and you noticed Momo was wearing nearly the same shade of lipstick as six years ago
your hands held her waist, loosely, the both of you sitting back on your heels, only leaning forward for each other.
when Momo pulled away, you felt a little dazed.
βI donβt want to be bad for you,β she mumbled, and all these years had seemed so childishβ just two girls, trying to figure it out. You never wanted to hurt each other. It was just fear, and maybe a little shame, and so much love that it nearly drowned you.
βMomo,β you began, quietly. You knew that what you were going to tell her would force her away from you forever, but you didnβt care.
βI love you,β
the confession hung in the air, ringing through resounding silence. Seoul in January was cold, and your breaths could be seen in the air.
when Momo didnβt reply, you felt tears well in your eyes even if you knew this is how it would be.
βIβm sorry,β were your nexts words, and when you hiccuped, Momo finally broke out of her daze.
she screwed her eyes shut, snaking her hand to your nape, pulling you into her, kissing you desperately.
βno, donβt apologize,β she muttered, between gasps for air.
βI love you, y/n. I love you,β
it felt like the world stopped, in that second.
βIβm sorry for.. being scared, but Iβm not anymore. I love you,β she repeated, wiping the tears from your eyes, thumb caressing your face.
βReally?β you asked, hope and fear mixing into your words. This could just be some cruel joke, after all, it could-
βy/n,β she said, seriously. βI love you,β
you leaned in again, and it was softer, now, feeling a year roll down your cheek, not from sadness but from relief, and happiness.
βGod, Momo,β you choked out. βI love you so much,β
you both stayed like that, for a little under half an hour, telling each other all the things you wished you had so many years ago, making hopeful promises and swearing never to hurt each other again.
βHere,β Momo said, suddenly, producing another small box.
it was a beautiful silver chain bracelet, with a little pink gemstone in the center in the shape of a small star.
momo had the same bracelet on her wrist, though the gemstone was in your favorite color and the chain was in gold.
βHappy birthday, y/n,β she offered, putting the bracelet on your wrist.
you smiled, genuinely, eyes crinkling. You pressed a kiss to her cheek.
βItβs beautiful,β you admitted, softly, before a teasing smile worked its way onto your face.
βYouβre beautiful, too, so do you think you could be my gift, instead?β
that comment earned you a slap on the shoulder and a chiding βyahβ, but it gave you the view of Momoβs face flushing pink, and the sound of her infectious laugh.
βIf you ask nicely, Iβll consider it,β was her response, in the end.
you and Momo were definitely dating, now, and you leaned your head forward, resting your forehead on hers.
βHow do you say girlfriend in Japanese?β
Momoβs cheeks turned a little pink, again, and she was well aware you already knew, but she indulged you. It was your birthday, after all.
βζδΊΊβ she mumbled, but you knew well enough.
(lover)
a smile grew on your face.
βI know you already know Korean well enough, so you shouldnβt call anyone else μκΈ°μΌ but me, okay?β you informed, mostly joking.
βSure,β she agreed, smile blooming on her face at the thought of you calling her your girlfriend. βAnything you want,β
year 9; early April, 2024 | Korea
Momoβs black hair had stayed the same for almost two years or so.
it was still a bit short, but you didnβt really care.
you were 25, now, didnβt smoke anymore, having been dating Momo officially for nearly a year.
You two had actually gone on a dateβ you had been commenting on each otherβs Instagram jokingly for weeks now. Her fans had been convinced she would βnot pullβ with her.. strange choice emojis, but they didnβt know you had already fallen head over heels for the loser you were currently sat next to.
you went to go get something to eat, with her, and it was still a little cool in Seoul.
you took photos, togetherβ and posted themβ something you wouldβve been terrified to do a few years prior, fearing a dating scandal or something worseβ the destruction of your careers.
your worlds werenβt as scary, anymore. Twice had been around nearly 10 years, and you had been acting for the same amount of time. The public loved you, and though you didnβt feel like announcing your relationship status to the world, (you were both private, like that) it was nice to know that if anything were to come to light, you and Momo would be safe.
Korea had gotten a lot more accepting, over the years.
your parents were still the same, though they had become less strict about it. Your sister came home, sometimes, and your mother might actually love her girlish and kind wife more than her own daughter.
you made jokes about it, frequently.
your dad didnβt know about Momo, neither did your momβ your sister did, but after what happened to her, she wouldnβt force you to tell them. You didnβt think your parents would freak out, demand you to leave and disown youβ but you didnβt want to risk it.
on breaks, you and Momo would visit Japan, or any other city she wanted to go to.
if she had a fashion week schedule, well, youβd try to go! Especially as a fellow ambassador of MiuMiu. The public knew you both as close friends, so any antics were now ignored and written off as just friendship.
honestly, your house was better, now, because of her. The apartment was no longer something not lived in, out of a catalogβit was filled with little reminders of you two.
photos of each other, your achievements on a bookshelf, a tea kettle youβd thought Momo would like, her clothes sheβd leave there, plants you thought would make the place look better, little knickknacks from traveling, a second toothbrushβ
it felt like a home, full of little curios and plants, a reminder of the life you loved with Momo.
and now, as you sat next to her on the couch the two of you had bought together, under warm lighting and lights of the city outside the window, so much different than the one from the skyline eight years ago, completely different buildings but the same cool, multicolored glow, taking pictures for an Instagram post that others would call like it was, a βdateβ, but never know how real it really wasβ
you pressed a kiss to her cheek, smiling into it, as she took the photo.
she turned to you, an amused expression on her face, albeit a bit surprised, perfectly tinged the pink shade of the lipstick you used to wearβ
βWhat was that for? You know we canβt post that-β
βI love you,β you interrupted, with a stupid smile on your face.
βI love you too, silly, but we still canβt-β
you cut her off, again, pressing a kiss to her lips, discarding the phone, somewhere, smiling as you cupped her face in your hands.
those pictures, of you two kissing? They wouldnβt be posted.
the rest would, of course, a day lateβ you had gotten a bit sidetracked.
it didnβt matter, though.
you truly, irrevocably, loved Hirai Momo. She was beautiful, talented, funny, kindβ you could keep going, there were a million and one reasons to love her.
but for some reason, she loved you back.
A/N: hi guys!! I had been thinking about this plot line for actual weeks but I managed to finish this in 10 days.. crazy.. I only started actually working on it 3 days ago though LMFAO
so.. there was a lot of research put into this fic. I tried to make the timeline as close to the one in real life as possible, but obviously there will be some inconsistencies. y/n is momoβs fav actress if you could not tell.. I wonder why
i donβt exactly love how this fic came outβ I kind of lost the plot and repeated myself a lot. it actually came out completely different than how I originally imagined, which is why the song doesnβt exactly match? but I hope you enjoyed!
I will hopefully be posting more frequently.. I have a few things in mind, but my works take me a long time because I usually set them up, get the plot, then sit down and finish like 8k words in two or three days.
not beta read, Iβm tired, maybe tomorrow.
please feel free to send asks and reqs! I love talking to you all <33 id love to know what you think..
thank you for @cry4mina for the misamo pictures and for being delulu with me about misamo <3 MISAMOOO
when you said you wanted your college life to be eventful
you didn't expect the universe throwing you three girlfriends, each with their own side of how they got you locked with them
it starts during the first semester of your 3rd year, when you were in a small cafe, getting to a headstart in your pile of homework
it's perfect, a iced coffee by your side, three readings beside you, your laptop on the coffee table in front of you and phone silenced, muting whatever the onslaught of messages nayeon is sending that you can't even be bothered to check
you needed this, you couldn't handled anymore 'dubchaeng babysitting!' when the duo would just make your head hurt with the amount of crazy ideas they had. the change of pace for the day is much welcome, especially knowing that jeongyeon took over with the lure of seeing a band a cafe next university over
it's nice, you can feel like you are in control for even just for a bit
then the cafe's noise dies down when the door chimes
it's too silent
fuck.
you brace yourself at the trio, whoβs presence can make the entire student populous go on their knees. the mere whisper of their little group brings the entire college either trembling
misamo.
you can feel her gaze land on you, despite the only indication that it is one of them without looking is the whispers within the cafe. even the baristas know them
hirai momo. softball player, the star athlete that brings medals and more recognition to your university. average grades, stellar performance when she steps on the field and can land a nasty punch
with each step you hear her take, the more you have to remind yourself not to look. you can hear her giggles and the way your heartbeat is now in your ears
minatozaki sana. influencer and model, the unspoken leader of their group. through her bubbly and charming personality, she uses her wit to become the face of the university. part of the top 10% of the whole university, the inspiration to study hard and diligently
you feel a hand on your shoulder, the firm grasp rendering you unable to move, yet it's how you know who it is. she hums in delight at your sharp intake of breath, knowing that you don't need anything else to tell her apart
myoui mina. rising entrepreneur of 3 different business ventures, the deadliest one from the trio. always calculating, always 10 steps ahead of her peers and competitors. sweet, kind, and demur, she brings class to whatever she does
that includes sitting beside you, her bag gently landing on the table, your proximity leaves the others questioning your relationship, but all you know is that you must have done something at your shared class with her yesterday for her too approach you
"i hope you don't mind" she starts, eyes confident and you want to scream and cry because she's wearing a suit. typically worn when she's fresh from visiting one of her businesses. "i heard you were well versed in code"
"programming is my major yes" you keep your voice leveled, after all, being a woman in such a male dominated course has made you what your flock of admirers say, freezingly cold.
"i have a proposition for you" mina starts, keeping a dangerous game of who can keep the eye contact going "you help me with homeworks and projects while i give you money per assessment made"
while mina has a fair share of students that matched her energy, something in your gaze makes her crack a bit
"what makes you think i'll say yes?"
"you can't say no to me"
"yes i can. here watch i'll say it"
and mina can't deny it when she feels her heart start to race when you get closer to her. faces barely a few inches apart
"i don't do things for money. so no"
and you pull back, ready to put back to attention to your homework when mina speaks up
"every time you have to help me i'll pay you in food"
oh goodness free food
"ok i'm in" you hum, hands typing away on your laptop "we start in two days, send me an address and i'll met you there myoui. now shoo, i have to catch up to my work"
she stares at you with a blank gaze, but inside she's dumbfounded at your boldness
nevertheless, she stands up to leave you be, but before she's out of earshot, she says something you don't quite catch
"what?" you ask
"you should call me mina. myoui is too professional even for my taste dear"
three days later, it's momo who bugs you after your morning class
she slips up right beside you, the lack of dress code in the university gives momo a chance to wear a body hugging pink dress, something that makes everyone go crazy. what you don't like is how every guy is looking at her in ways you want to pluck their eyes out
filthy bastards don't deserve to gaze at her at all
"momo" your ears are red because everyone can clearly see you both in the halls, her arm around your waist as you slowly walk to the next building for your next class "what are you doing?"
"accompanying you to class" momo won't admit it, but ever since mina said you were, in her words, 'pretty and sufficient', she had to see you
"why?" you ask, glaring at every man who's looking at her too creepily, making them scurry away
"just because, plus our classrooms are right beside each other" she relaxes more with each less man in the hall, you notice it
"fine" you huff, and before she can even say anything else, you remove your jacket, giving it to her "wear this for today, i don't want any man to look at you. you're too gorgeous for them"
the rest of the walk is silent on the way to both of your classrooms. only thing you can hear is the squeak of every sneaker from each man running way and the whispers in between students
it's the most peaceful walk momo has had since becoming star athlete
so when you wave at her from the door before disappearing to go to the classroom beside her's, she feels like she can breath without panicking
she hates taking anything math related, but she might bare it more when she knows your beside her classroom
she's hooked
later that afternoon, while you lounge around the student council office sipping a red bull, someone barges in, scaring your team who's having a heated debate on who should the rest of the papers
"fucking jesus who the fuck-" ryujin is silenced from who she sees at the door
minatozaki sana, the ever persistent and one of the most notable member under the team of the president.
"someone sent you flowers?"
not a question you were expecting, even your team is gawking at her
dressed to perfection, you can't catch her in a regular outfit at any point, which is kind of ridiculous. sana doesn't care, always styled like she's going to a fashion week in europe. today she's wearing that white dress that she just wore in her feature in some magazine
what is it with the trio and wearing designer clothing every time they are at university grounds? specifically when they are within your eyesight
"pardon?" you know the amount of admires that still try despite cold rejection, even hailing from different courses. hell you think someone from the university over sent you chocolates once, you gave it to your team though
"did you accept some stupid boy's flowers?" sana repeats, anger in her eyes, an emotion she barely shows, and possessiveness in her body language, something you see glimpses of when someone gets close to mina and momo that she doesn't approve of
"minatozaki you know i don't do that" you say calmly, your team in awe at how you keep a calm attitude "if the suitor doesn't have the guts to face me, then they do not deserve my limited time"
"then you'll entertain if i do right?"
you can hear felix and lily choke over their pizza behind you
"you are not serious" you look at her like she's crazy (she loves being called that, you learn from mina later on)
she gets closer to you, faces barely an inch apart, any slip up from her leaning way to closer over your table and she can just kiss you
"try me, i'll see you at tomorrow's meeting miss vice-president"
when she leaves the office, it takes you and your team a total of 5 minutes to recover
"jesus what the fuck was that"
"ryujin shut up, go back to bickering with lia"
no one has ever said no to the trio
maybe a few people had
they're just not as pretty, charming and confident as you
maybe that's why mina keeps sitting beside you during your shared programming class even oustide 'tutor' hours, why momo's insistent at being beside you in between periods to carry your items on days your classes line up, and why sana shows up in every weekly meeting with an expensive gift or a trinket, challenging each suitor head on.
women like them are gonna be the death of you
"you have some crazy women that like you" jihyo jests beside you, giggling at how sana is glaring daggers at how close you both are. you both are now taking a break along with the rest of the internal team to finalize some papers
"yeah well" you don't like to admit it, but ever since their persistence to always either be near you, you have been starting to crack bit by bit "can't really escape them y'know"
"i think you would look cute with them" jihyo hums, swinging her pen between her fingers, making someone across the table keep her stare at the president "misamo and their girlfriend who sucks ass at karaoke"
"ok that was one time" you huff, jihyo's snickering makes sana look up from her phone, jaw tensing up at how close jihyo is "clearly i let you win because you liked it when tzuyu said she's treat you out if you win right?"
that shuts her up. the said tall woman is at the other side of the room, watching the president's face get red, wondering what you just said to make her like this
"get back to work" jihyo then shoos you away, your laughter making jihyo flip you off before returning to work for herself
before you cam even return to work, your eyes meet sana's, her expression unreadable. you wonder what she's thinking of
you look away, a light blush on your cheeks from her intense stare, busying yourself once more with the papers
to sana, witnessing your smile and laughter rewires her brain, heart pleading with her to speed up whatever this stage the three of them are in. each day that passes drives the three of them crazy
mina is messing up in her calculations, momo is missing her shots and sana is losing her composure on the daily
she needs you. they need you.
when sana heads home that night she keeps thinking about you. even when she lets her girlfriends debate what their late night dinner should be (mina wants tacos, momo is craving for some pasta). she blurts out in the middle of it
"do you think y/n would say yes if we offered her sushi as a late night dinner?"
the two stop at their bickering to look at sana, who's eyes are begging for the next move. she's getting itchy and desperate to make it
"satang" mina reaches out to her, letting sana wrap her arms around her waist as momo hugs them both "did something happen?"
"it's just" sana doesn't even try to hide it at this point, knowing that the three of them are nearing their breaking point "i saw her laugh today and it really made me think that 'i want to make her laugh with us' and i-i don't know but it has been driving me mad"
mina hums in understanding and momo speaks up, ready to take that push
"then let's go"
staying late even after meetings is normal for you to catch up with the papers, but for the past few days, you have been staying late in the office to busy your thoughts
mina hasn't been looking at you in the eye or been acknowledging you
momo hasn't been accompanying you to class
sana hasn't shown up to a single meeting this past two weeks
trying to silence your head, you decided to throw yourself into your extra curriculars every night. this night, you are working alone, the only sounds that you can hear are your aggressive typing on your poor keyboard, the music coming from your small speaker and the voices in your head making your heart ache
and now a knock and the door swinging open
"if you have any concerns please drop them by our social media accounts, email, or even the drop box by the-"
you stop your next words when you look up
mina.
you want to curse at the woman, for deliberately avoiding you. it was worse with her, because at least with the two you didn't have the urge to scream because they simply did not show up.
momo.
even clad in that handsome suit, she's still wearing that jacket you handed over to her. devastatingly handsome and gorgeous, you wonder why did she have to leave you wondering in the noisy university halls
sana.
meetings are still the same, but jihyo keeps on asking why your eyes have been straying, always going back to the door. waiting for that laugh to annoy you, waiting for a snarky remark to any stupid men flirting with you, waiting for anything from her
you really want to throw a chair at them for just showing up now and pissing you off
you don't though, because you missed them
each in their own suit, each with their own gift, each one with a nervous smile that no one will ever see, each one wearing their hearts up their sleeves, and each with the same question you didn't know you wanted to hear until now
"we like you. would you like to go out with us? dinner tomorrow night, our treat"
you can't say no
"you guys are horrible at courting. pick me up at 7"
bonus:
in every first date you've been on, you never come over to your dates home. that changes and ends with them
"hirai" you're trying to keep your breath stable as her hands are playing your hair. eyes hazy, but clearly on you, her self control out the door, just like yours
"myoui" she's behind you, her hands on your waist, murmuring what she's been thinking about for the past days. it's all you, and it makes you melt
"minatozaki" you let her kiss you, silencing your worries and doubts, silencing anything that makes you question them. the heart finally getting what it wants
Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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subby momo probably cums just from eating u out and gets pussy drunk
she def does :(( that reminds me of this fic!
rewarding her by letting her eat you out for hours, amused by the way she whines every time you tug her head away to check in on her.
"baby, aren't you tired yet?" you ask, breathless and exhausted from your latest orgasm. momo whines, trying to pull away from your grasp on her hair to attach her lips back to your clit. "no.. no.. one more, please?"
"sweetheart..." you sit up shakily, scratching her scalp lightly so she wouldn't whine about the lack of pussy in her mouth. she was so sweet-looking like this, doe eyes and pouty lips and flushed cheeks andβ
your foot feels something damp as you were adjusting the way you sat, curious, you looked down. "baby, did you cum?"
momo's cheeks flush as her gaze follows yours, the mess she made on the sheets being more obvious than yours. how could she not notice? she was too busy pleasing you to even realize she'd reached her peak. multiple times.
"ohβi'm sorry, i didn't mean to!" she immediately hides her face against your neck, wanting the earth to swallow her whole. "sweetieβ" you try to conceal your laughter as you rub her back gently, pulling her onto your lap. "βdon't be sorry. i think it's cute how needy you are. you know that."
momo nods, holding you tighter as she lets out a little whimper of acknowledgement.
"why don't you help me change our sheets so we can cuddle for the rest of the night, hm?"
edging her w a vibe for hours till her cock is constantly twitching :(
she hasn't been on her best behavior lately so you force her to sit still while you work, never letting the vibrator go any higher than the lowest setting. you can see her squirming out of the corner of your eye, whining and fussing because it's just not enough!
you can't even feel bad because you explicitly told her to sit still. so, you grab the remote and turn it all the way up. momo yelps, whiny moans and 'thank you's leaving her lips constantly.
"mmfβfuck! mommy, 'm gonnaβ"
the vibrator turns off completely. she blinks, looking down in confusion, then to you in desperation. "whaβ? why?"
"i told you to sit still, didn't i, puppy?"
she whimpers.
"sorry."
"you better be."
momo knew she would be stuck here for hours, orgasm after orgasm being ripped awayβshe starts crying. you'd have to take care of her and coddle her for the rest of the night, but it was worth it if it meant she'd finally learn her lesson.
GODDDDD i will literally kiss you anon.. shes so puppygirl coded it makes me INSANE!!
her grinding against your ass first thing in the morning bc she always has morning wood :( whimpering into your ear, crying from desperation until you wake up and take care of her.
she loves when you tie her up and use her for your own pleasure. on her knees, forced to eat you out for hours? to a chair, so you could ride her until she cries??? just the thought gets her all whiny and begging you to give her some attention</3
and its so good 'cause everyone always sees her as this big bad girl protecting you when you two go out. little do they know, just call her a good girl once and she's begging to let her breed u!
hi!! i had an idea to make something special for my 900 followers and this is my idea
basically, my requests are gonna stay open for one week! and you have time to send in as many requests as you want for a (like 1k word) fic. my requests for kinktober will be open till the 20th of september!
you can basically request smut scenarios you'd like to see!
rules!
member x member, member x reader or member x member x reader!
i problably wont write sub!twice (you can try to send a req but it wont be guaranteed that ill write it!)
give specific kinks with it
i write almost everything (softer kinks but also dark content like somno, cnc and more)
idk if im gonna take g!p member asks, so if you want you can send them in and if i decide on not writing g!p ill just make it a strap!
one example for a request:
"for kinktober i'd like momo with phone sex and degradation, praise and overstimulation"
Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
β Live Streamingβ Interactive Chatβ Private Showsβ HD Qualityβ Free Actions
Free to watch β’ No registration required β’ HD streaming
synopsis: one of your students has the most obvious crush on you, but you have the most obvious crush on his mother.
warnings: swearing? maybe idek AHAHA
w/c: 6.9k
a/n: kind of an homage to my fav person on this app @miinatozakiii βs first published work the kindergarten teacher sana πββοΈ happy late one year anniversary babe π₯°
ββΰ³β
βalright kids, don't forget i'm seeing most of your parents tonight so if you want to make a good impression, you better start doing your homework because i know most of you don't!"
there are collective groans across the classroom as they pack up their things and leave, thanking you as they head out the door to their next period.
you giggle, recalling the days you were a student in their position, you rarely did your math homework as well.
"ms. l/n?"
you look up from your desk with a smile.
"i- um- i just wanted to s-say- thank you for this lesson. i was really- um- struggling with derivatives when you introduced them last time but you made it really clear this class."
you beam, appreciating the feedback, "that's great to hear hideki! if you have any more trouble in the future please be sure to let me know, i'll be happy to set up bonus small group classes or even individual sessions if you guys need the help."
"t-thanks ms. l/n. that's really nice of you."
"it's my job hideki." you smile, "did you need any help with anything else?"
he shakes his head shyly, hand at the back of his neck, "that was all! thanks again miss!"
"no worries, i'll see you tonight?"
he agrees happily, darting out the door with his cheeks flushed.
it wasn't the first time a student had had a crush on you. it was normally harmless. some of them had tried to confess to you over the years, usually waiting until after they graduated because they thought itβd be okay if you no longer had a student-teacher relationship. some of them would confess while you were still their teacher regardless, those were a little tougher because you had to continue teaching them and watch them pout and lose motivation to do their schoolwork and act awkward around you, no longer wanting to participate in class or ask questions if they didnβt understand something. youβd try to let them down gently, and if you noticed they were struggling with coursework, youβd pull them aside or ask another one of the teachers to check in on them.
most of the time though, they were just simple little crushes that would pass with time or after they moved out of your class. you didn't entertain them but it was cute seeing your students in their awkward teen years discovering feelings for the first time.
you stretch, yawning, but yelp when someone's finger jabs into your exposed armpit.
there's a burst of laughter and you frown, staring at the intruder.
"really nayeon?"
the english teacher rolls her eyes with a cheeky grin, "saw hideki on the way out. did he give you that confession note?"
"what confession note?"
nayeon hops a little, a hand covering her mouth, "oh shit."
you narrow your eyes. "tell me."
she grins, not really apologetic for having accidentally spilt her studentβs secret, "saw him decorating a card and everything in english class today. his grammar was a little off so i just helped him correct it a little. oh ms. l/n. how i wish to be able to call you by your first name. how i wish to be able to hold you and-" she puts on an exaggerated romeo-like voice and pose, back of her hand coming up to her forehead.
you stand up, slapping her lightly with a blush, "why did you encourage him?!"
she shrugs with a laugh, "i'm an english teacher. gotta make sure the kids are using the language right even if it's for illicit love notes."
you huff, packing up your desk and getting ready to go to lunch, "can't he find a nice girl his age to be in love with? i'm sure he has so many options since he's the star player of the school basketball team and everything."
"something about you attracts the kiddies y/n."
you scrunch your nose, "ew. that sounds gross. i don't even like younger men."
"women?"
"no preference. just someone in the same life stage y'know?"
"wait should i be offended? how come no student has ever confessed to me? aren't english teachers supposed to be like a gay girl's awakening?"
you laugh, ignoring the woman's question, dragging her out of your classroom and to lunch together before you both have to attend to your kids again.
ββΰ³β
you enjoyed your job, but parent-teacher interviews were probably your least favourite part of it. if you wanted to deal with parents all day you'd have become a primary school teacher.
there were all kinds of them, some who didn't show up, some who didn't care, some who cared too much, some who were clueless, and some who thought they could do your job better than you.
you rub your temples, grateful for the little 5 minute break you're afforded in between quick 10 minute interviews that would normally go on for longer than that. you blink around the room, the other mathematics teachers gathered in the same classroom, nayeon was down the hall with the other english teachers. you were the youngest of them all, there was a pretty big shortage of secondary mathematics teachers across the country, so it meant maths teachers were putting off retirement for longer so they can continue to support kids, but it still left a lot of gaps that could be filled to give your students the best education they deserved.
you've dazed off enough that you barely register hideki almost bounding in, still in his basketball uniform from after-school practice.
he grins, sliding into the seat opposite yours, "hi ms. l/n!"
you return the smile, "hey hideki." even though you knew about his obvious crush on you, he was still one of your favourite students, maybe it was because he had the crush on you that he was more eager to follow instructions and to prove himself and ask questions whenever he was confused that made him one of the easiest to teach.
and then a woman in a sleek beige coat next to hideki catches your attention. your gaze flicks over to hers. and it can't seem to break away.
she's the most beautiful human being you've ever laid your eyes on. her hair is dyed an autumn brown, wavy locks tucked behind ears, expensive gold jewelry adorning her neck, ears, hands. her eyes match the colour of her hair, a deep fawn brown you could stare into for hours. she's got the most perfect nose you've ever seen, you almost itched to measure it, find the angle of it, the way it led to her pretty lips, full and parted, inviting, pulling you in. and then you realise they're curling up slightly, and you snap your eyes back up to hers to see a mirthful glint in them.
you cough, blushing brightly, "h-hello mrs. hayashi."
"just sana is fine. minatozaki sana. i never married hidekiβs father." her voice is silky smooth, there's a certain drawl to it too, it makes you want to listen to her voice on repeat, teasing out every inflection in tone.
you can feel your blush reaching the tips of your ears, "o-oh sorry! i didn't know i apologise!"
sana laughs, it's bright and airy, you don't think you've heard anything purer. "nothing to be sorry about. we broke up a long time ago. when hideki was still very young."
you nod, deciding you can't continue staring at her or you may just faint, so you look down at your files, shuffling them around with no purpose, just to give your hands something to do.
"so how's hideki doing in class?" you can hear the smirk in her voice, her attentive eyes watching as you fumble around.
"he's um- very good- he always makes sure to ask questions whenever he's stuck on anything, and he's probably one of my only students who keeps up with his homework."
"well that's good isn't it deki? what were you so nervous for?" sana teases her son as he blushes, mumbling something under his breath.
you speak up again, "nothing to be nervous about. hideki is one of my best students, he keeps up very well despite his extra curriculars."
sana snorts, "i wish we could say the same about his other subjects. it seems maths is the only thing he tries in."
"mom!"
"what? you heard what your english teacher said. you need to spend some more time editing your own work than you do shooting hoops."
you laugh, "i'm sure his english is alright. nayeon can be a pretty harsh teacher."
sana looks at you again with an eyebrow raised, you quickly look away. "just wait until you read some of his work ms. l/n. you'll be surprised."
hideki blushes again, deciding he won't be giving you that love confession note he has in his bag after all.
"is there anything else i can do for him then? any particular areas he may be struggling in or any recommendations of what we can implement at home to make sure his maths marks stay consistent?"
"homework really. maths is a very practical subject so the more practice he gets the better grasp he'll have. especially with strange or out-of-the-box questions exams may throw at him; it helps a lot if he's practiced with as many question varieties as possible, most people are going to get those 1 or 2 markers, but the bigger questions that really need you to apply the concepts you learn are where you'll start to see distinctions between the students that just study and the students that really have the aptitude and patience for mathematics."
"never was me." sana jokes.
you smile, still avoiding her gaze, your cheeks pink, "i'm sure you would have been a prize student ms. minatozaki."
"just sana." she has a teasing smile on her face.
"r-right. sana."
it's quiet for a few seconds, hideki looks between his mother and you, squinting a little in confusion.
sana coughs, beginning to stand and holding out a hand, "well it was nice meeting you ms. l/n. i can finally understand why hideki goes on and on about his gorgeous maths teacher."
"mom!"
you blush again, taking her hand, almost melting at how soft it felt against yours, forcing yourself to meet her eyes again to be polite. you have to bring your other hand to hold your wrist when you shake it, to support your jelly-like arm in her presence. "it was nice meeting you too sana."
she tightens her grip, smirking a little, "i hope this won't be the last i'll be seeing you. have a good night."
and with that she's off, hideki whining and complaining next to her about how she's embarassed him. it was a little funny considering their height difference, hideki was a basketball player so he had to be tall for his sport, and sana was just a few centimetres shorter than you, though her aura commanded attention, her posture was perfect, you're caught staring at the slight sway in her hips as she walks away, but you quickly reprimand yourself, blushing even brighter at having realised you were just checking out your student's parent.
god she had your mind a mess, and you had a feeling it wouldn't be the last time for this to happen.
ββΰ³β
you were so out of your comfort zone. you barely knew anything about basketball. but nayeon just had to drag you to be co-supervisors for your school's basketball team since you didnβt have the funds for a real P.E. teacher. even worse, the parent volunteer just happened to be minatozaki sana, the parent you hadnβt been able to stop thinking about since your first meeting with her weeks ago.
nayeon noticed your odd behaviour immediately of course. so being the annoyingly loveable best friend she was, she made herself scarce, herding the kids away with every opportunity and trying to get you and sana alone as much as possible.
thatβs how you were now stuck with the woman of your dreams, sharing a hotel room in the place you were staying for the duration of the games.
βare you sure you donβt want me to get another room? the individual room was originally supposed to be meant for you- i canβt believe nayeon let herself get sick and stole it from you.β
sana giggles, plopping down her weekend bag. βitβs alright ms. l/n. i donβt mind sharing rooms with a pretty woman like you.β
you blushed brightly. that was the other problem with sana. she was a flirt. every chance she got sheβd make some sort of teasing remark on the way here, or brush a little too close than what was acceptable for friends, and you were barely even friends.
βj-just y/n is fine. i feel weird if someone my age is calling me by my last name like that.β
βhow do you know iβm your age?β she smirks.
βo-oh! i just- i mean- i- iβm in my early 30s and you look quite young and but hideki is already 16 so i just assumed um-β
she laughs again, βthank you for the compliment. youβre right. i had hideki when i was 19. his dad promised to take care of him, provide for us, yβknowβ¦ all the works. he couldnβt take it and left not even a year into hidekiβs life. i ended up having to drop out of university and learn to balance work and a baby. my parents weren't any good either, said it was my fault for getting knocked up so early in my life and that i should've been prepared for the consequences."
you perch on the end of your bed, listening attentively while she unpacks her things, "i'm sorry you had to go through that."
she shrugs, "made me who i am today. and plus i have hideki now. and he'll always have me. what about you? any kids? partner?"
you blush as she turns back to you, copying your stance and sitting on her bed facing you. "no. iβve always been around kids so thereβs not exactly a ton of romantic prospects.β you joke.
sana laughs, βwhat about nayeon?β
you cringe immediately, βew gross no. weβre just friends. there arenβt that many young teachers that arenβt already married and who arenβt spread all over the country so nayeon and i easily clicked because weβre similar in age and single. not that itβs difficult to get along with the older teachers thereβs just some things that weβll be able to do that they might not necessarily want to anymoreβ¦ like drink or whatever.β
βare you looking for anyone then?β thereβs a smirk on sanaβs face that you know can only mean sheβs up to no good.
βu-um- well- i mean- uh- like if it comes it comes iβm not actively looking for it. iβm happy with the kids even if i die old and alone because thereβs always going to be more kids to teach so iβm never really going to be alone unless i quit or get fired.β
βi really admire teachers yβknow. you can take care of a classroom of kids and offer them knowledge when someone like my ex boyfriend couldnβt even handle one child.β
while you were talking, you didnβt even notice that sana had moved onto your bed, sitting next to you, shoulders touching, eyes peering into yours.
you chuckle awkwardly, βw-well iβm actually not that great with younger kids.β
sana frowns, βdonβt do that. bringing yourself down to defend a shitty man are both things i donβt want to hear. from what iβve seen, you love your job and you really care about your kids. you should be proud of that. teachers donβt get enough of the appreciation they should.β
βt-thank you sana.β
βof course.β
itβs quiet after that, and more than awkward. you have no idea where to look, suddenly conscious of her body pressed against yours, fiddling with your hands, feeling sweat build up.
sana just watches you with a glint in her eye, observing all of your actions.
she breaks the tension that seemingly came out of nowhere first, βhow do you feel about me?β
your eyes widen, not expecting such a straightforward question, βs-sorry?β
βyouβre nervous. do i make you nervous y/n?β
your blush was pretty much permanently fixed on your face now.
βu-um-β
βitβs okay if i do. i just hope it's for the right reasons." she pouts. it's criminal. "you'd tell me if there was something else right?"
"r-right! yes of course yes-"
"good. so you're nervous because you find me attractive?" her pout morphs into a smirk within nanoseconds.
"um- i-"
"you said you'd tell me if it was something else remember?" and then she's straight back into a pout. it was giving you whiplash, the change in expressions, dizzying you.
"um- i- yes- you are- yes you are very pretty and-"
"so you want to kiss me?"
"um-!"
sana finally lets you go, laughing brightly and moving away to give you some space before you burst or melted.
"just joking y/n. i'm sorry you're just too easy to tease and your reactions are adorable!"
you can breathe again, the oxygen finally reaching your brain now that sana wasn't so close to you, and your lips turn downward, imitating her pout from earlier, "sana!"
she continues laughing, going back to unpacking her things while you collect yourself and think just how you were going to survive the two days away sharing a room with the potential love of your life who also happened to be a massive tease.
ββΰ³β
thankfully, the rest of the night was pretty uneventful. you checked in on all the boys, made sure they had all had dinner and weren't planning anything irresponsible like a party behind your backs or anything. you also checked in on nayeon who in your professional opinion, looked absolutely fine, having ordered room service and was in one of the hotel robes with her feet kicked up enjoying a face mask and a bottle of wine all to herself.
sana also didn't try anything else when you retired to your own hotel room after doing the rounds on the boys' rooms again to make sure they were all in bed and getting the rest they needed before their game tomorrow. you're not sure if you were grateful or disappointed she didn't, but you quickly pushed her out of your mind, needing to rest as well before having to wake up early to take all the kids to the stadium.
you're knocking loudly on the last room you were meant to check on, annoyed the boys were taking so long, you were all meant to meet in the lobby 10 minutes ago for your bus to the stadium.
when you sigh, prepared to rap your knuckles against the door again, it falls away, revealing a distressed hideki and his roommate for the trip.
"ms. l/n! i'm so sorry we're late eric had some trouble um-" he looks behind him, "we're pretty much ready now! just got to grab some last minute stuff and-" he leaves the door open, continuing his ramble while you cross your arms, tapping your foot impatiently, watching the boys run around the room collecting last minute things and throwing them into gym bags.
by the time they're almost done, sana's snuck up behind you, peeking over your shoulder.
"deki! what are you doing? are you the one holding everyone up? what kind of example are you setting for your team if the team captain's late?"
you jump at her voice, not having noticed her standing right behind you. you turn, admiring her side profile, she's got her hair up today, but still looks as expensive as the first time you saw her.
hideki blushes at his mom yelling at him, picking up his pace a little and jabbing eric, telling him to hurry up.
sana notices you staring at her and turns with a smile, "hi y/n. missed you this morning."
you fluster immediately, snapping your eyes away, "u-um sorry! i uh- got up early and didn't want to wake you and decided to get breakfast early on my own before making sure all the kids were awake."
she pouts, "you should've woken me. we could've had breakfast together."
"s-sorry i'll remember for next time."
"next time? you planning on waking up next to me again y/n?"
you can hear the teasing tone in her voice without needing to look at her, "i meant tomorrow! tomorrow morning."
sana giggles next to your ear, relenting when hideki and eric finally finish up, slightly out of breath when they come up to you, hideki apologising to you profusely, almost bowing down in the hotel hallway while holding all his heavy gym bags before you stop him, embarrassed enough by his mother watching the interaction closely with a curious glint in her eyes.
by the time you get downstairs nayeon already has most of the kids on the bus, reprimanding the two late boys again before letting them go and telling them to get on the bus as well. she had claimed her sickness was miraculously cured overnight, and that all she needed was a good night's sleep in a hotel room by herself.
she had teased both you and sana, asking sana innocently if she'd want to change rooms again now that she wasn't sick, but sana had said it'd be too much work and she didn't mind sharing a room with you anyway. nayeon elbowed you making an exaggerated show of her eyebrows wriggling around when sana wasn't looking, winking and looking all too satisfied with herself. you ignored her, strutting ahead and onto the bus, crossing your arms and pouting.
sana comes up next, giggling at you and plopping down on the seat next to yours. thankfully, the bus ride to the stadium wouldn't take long this time, the ride here was almost 5 hours long, and sana had taken a liking to sleeping on your shoulder almost the entire way there. you were stiff and couldn't wait to fall into bed when nayeon pulled her sick move and ruined your plans of being able to relax, not possible in the presence of the other woman.
the kids are rowdy and energetic, hyping each other up on the bus. you have to tell them to quieten down a few times but you let them get away with most of what they do, smiling at the sight of them so eager for their game.
when you arrive, nayeon's the first to stand, using her loud voice and commanding attention, her voice that should've been at least a little hoarse from her apparent sickness yesterday.
"alright! remember you're representing your school district now! and you're sharing this space with other people so i don't want to hear you guys as loud as you were on this bus okay? i won't hesitate to bench anyone who fools around too much and that means you won't get to play and you'd have come all this way for nothing understand?"
nayeon really was strict as a teacher, but you knew she loved her job as much as you did.
the kids nod, determined to be good, adrenaline running from the excitement of almost getting to the court.
you step off the bus first, talking to the bus driver and letting them know when they can come back and pick you guys up to go back to the hotel. then the kids are hopping off the bus one by one, and you're making sure they don't run off or do anything stupid while waiting for everyone to assemble.
by the time the team is actually on the court and warming up, you're almost as excited as them, the atmosphere of the stadium hyping you up, sitting on the sidelines with towels and water bottles ready for their breaks. you had tried to study up a little on what exactly went on in basketball, the rules and the basics, the kids may not have a coach but you still wanted to be as supportive as you could even though your job only required you to supervise them safely between the venues and the hotel.
"have you come to a lot of these games?" you ask sana mindlessly, watching as the boys start doing practice shots and drills.
"yeah. i try to go to as many of deki's things as i can."
"that's very sweet. it's really good for the kids, when the parents show up to things they work hard for."
sana hums. "i try."
"he's lucky to have you."
"i think he may appreciate you a little more though." she teases, bumping shoulders with you.
you laugh, "he'll get over it. they all do."
"this has happened before?"
you shrug, "i swear i don't do anything out of the ordinary. maybe i'm just nicer than nayeon."
"so your type obviously isn't kids. what is it?" sana teases.
you blush, "i don't know. i don't really have one i think."
"oh come on. everyone says that. tell me the truth. i won't judge i promise."
you roll your eyes, smiling, "well... i think at this point in my life i just want someone who wants to settle down. i'm not that young anymore and i've already achieved what i wanted in my career so all i really want now is someone to share the rest of my life with."
"boring! c'mon gimme the juicy stuff. like personality, physical attributes." she pokes you with a grin on her face as well.
"fine fine. i guess when it comes to women i tend to like slightly older women, extroverted, good with kids obviously, i don't reaaaally care for all the physical stuff but probably someone around my height i guess."
"stand up for me."
you do as she asks, confused, then she stands up as well, stepping in almost eye-to-eye. you flush immediately. she brings her hand to measure the top of her head, knocking it against your forehead.
then she smirks, "so i'm pretty much your type then?"
you stutter, falling backwards and back into your seat, mumbling incoherently. sana giggles, sitting back down as well.
"if it's any consolation, my type in women tends to be slightly taller, good with kids, a little awkward, gets flustered easily, but loves her job."
you blink at her, still processing her words when the buzzer sounds signaling the start of the game.
sana winks, then turns her attention to the game, cheering on your school's team as they get in starting position. nayeon jogs over to join you both on the sideline bench, cheering as well. you put your muddled thoughts aside to focus on being there for the kids, but sana's confession? was it even a confession? never left the back of your mind.
ββΰ³β
your school won. the boys are ecstatic, clapping each other on the back, streamers are thrown, the crowd is wild, loving the game they witnessed.
eventually, the stadium clears out while the boys cooldown. the janitors come and kick everyone off the floor soon enough, the kids still whooping and parading around their championship trophy, taking pictures with smiles all around.
you smile fondly as well, watching them leave the stadium, so proud of themselves. but then there's a cough behind you, and you turn, surprised to see hideki still there, not leading his team off on their victory lap.
"you okay hideki?"
the boy blushes, rubbing the back of his neck shyly, still in his team uniform, sweat running down his body.
"i um- i was actually wondering if we could talk?"
you frown, immediately concerned, "yeah of course. what's up?"
his eyes flit around, making sure the stadium is pretty much empty except for the janitors cleaning up after the game. and then he looks back at you, you're struck then how much he looks like sana, he has her nose, her eyes, you never noticed before but after spending more time with sana, you can start to see parts of her in her son.
he clears his throat again, obviously nervous, wringing his hands out, "u-um- so i promised myself that if we won this game, i'd finally be truthful to both myself and you. so um- ms. l/n... i think i'm in love with you!" he bows deeply with his confession.
you stand there, slightly in shock despite knowing about his feelings for a long time now. and then you feel terrible, having to reject him on what was supposed to be one of the highlights of his high school experience.
you tap his shoulder lightly, non-verbally asking him to straighten up, he flinches at the touch, eyes fierce when they meet yours.
"hideki... i'm sorry. i don't feel the same way about you. you're my student, i care about all of you equally, but never as more than a student."
his face breaks your heart, you see sana in him, it's almost like you made sana cry.
"is it my age? what if i graduated? would you be interested in me after i graduated?" he's desperate, reaching for any possibility where you could return his feelings.
you shake your head, offering a gentle smile, "i'm sorry hideki. i know you'll find the right person for you one day though. that person just isn't going to be me."
his head droops down, hair coming to cover his eyes as he stares down at his shoes, trying to hide his tears. "i understand. thank you for taking the time to listen to me ms. l/n. i'll get out of your hair now." and then he's jogging off behind you towards the exit.
you sigh, turning around, surprised to see sana there, frowning when she sees hideki in tears approaching her.
she looks between him and you in confusion, but hideki reaches her first. she cups his face, asking him what happened, but he refuses to speak, and sana brings him down into her hugging him and patting his back.
she glances at you then, still frowning. your heart sinks, not sure what sorts of conclusions she could be drawing, but knowing right now, it looked like you had said or done something that made her son cry.
she leads him away, you ache to tell her what really happened, but you know you should keep your distance for the sake of your student right now, you just pray sana doesn't think of you any differently.
ββΰ³β
the rest of the day goes by in a blur. the boys go out for celebratory dinner. they notice their captain is a lot more down than usual, and they try cheering him up, playing games at dinner, laughing and teasing each other, but nothing seems to be working.
you couldn't help but feel a little guilty, and sana hadn't spoken to you since the game. you're not sure if it's on purpose or if she's just busy keeping the kids entertained and checking on hideki every once in a while, but not wanting to smother him with all his friends around. he doesn't seem to mind though, in fact he only responds to sana, even when his friends try and include him he stays quiet, picking at his food aimlessly.
when you get back to the hotel, you give a speech about how they shouldn't sleep too late even though you could understand their excitement still remaining from winning the championships, they still had to get up early tomorrow so you could take the bus back home. nayeon would normally give the speech since she was a little more threatening than you, but she was also currently wasted, having gone a little too hard on the celebrations with the boys. she was currently leaning on you, almost dozing off as you rattled off instructions and rules before sending them all off to their rooms.
sana's gone with them before you can speak to her, so you sigh, wrapping an arm around nayeon's waist and helping your friend back to her own room, setting her in bed and pulling the covers up, turning off the lights and leaving a cup of water next to her bedside for when she wakes up later.
you feel nervous going back to your own room, unsure of what sana thinks of you now.
you open the door, almost grateful to hear the shower on, indicating the other woman was cleaning herself up.
you anxiously start packing your things up, cleaning around the room a little and grabbing clothes for your shower.
the shower turns off and your heart rate increases tenfold. you still have some time before she comes out though, so you continue to busy yourself, cleaning anything and everything.
"y/n?"
you turn quickly at her voice, almost fainting at the sight of her wrapped only in a towel. you yelp, turning back around just as quickly, "s-sorry!"
sana giggles, padding up to her bed, "it's okay. i left my clothes out here."
you can hear the rustle of her towel being dropped and her starting to dress yourself. your face is burning up, trying desperately to clear your mind of thoughts of a very naked sana standing right behind you, probably watching you make a fool out of yourself.
"i'm dressed." she teases, plopping down onto her bed.
you turn with a sigh, but tense up when you realise her definition of dressed was a very thin camisole and shorts that really shouldn't be considered shorts.
sana smirks at your gaze, crossing her legs and watching the way your eyes follow the movement, drinking in the skin.
"so what happened with you and deki?"
your eyes snap back up to hers at the reminder, the guilt of it all coming back.
"i'm sorry- i didn't- i hope you know i didn't mean to-"
sana giggles, grabbing the towel to start drying her hair, "relax y/n. i figured as much. he wouldn't tell me what happened but i assume it had something to do with his feelings for you?"
you gulp, nodding, not trusting your voice.
"like you said at the game, he'll get over it."
"you're not mad at me?"
she frowns, "why would i be mad at you?"
"well i- i thought you were avoiding me at dinner and- i mean i did just reject your son-"
sana lets out a loud laugh, "i think i'd be more mad if you didn't reject him. and i wasn't avoiding you. were you looking for my attention y/n?" she teases, wringing out her hair.
"oh. i'm glad then. that you weren't avoiding me. i was worried." you mumble, ignoring her question, knowing she was just trying to get a reaction out of you.
she stands up, brushing her hair behind her shoulders, walking up to you slowly. "why were you worried?"
you focus on a spot on the hotel carpet, avoiding her gaze, "i didn't want you to think i was- i don't know- i just didn't want you to think of me differently i guess."
"why do you care what i think of you?"
you blush, "well- i mean- i- you're- you're a parent of my student."
sana hums, still moving closer at a painfully slow pace, "is that all i am to you?"
"uh- well- no... you're um- you're sana."
she giggles, now toe-to-toe with you. "i am."
you almost let out a gasp when her cool fingers touch your chin, tilting your head up slightly to look her in the eyes. her eyes search yours, then they move over your face, tracing your features. you lick your lips unconsciously, the tension between the two of you unable to be explained by a simple parent-teacher relationship, or even a friendship anymore.
"it's funny." her voice is lower now, spoken right onto your lips, there was no need for volume, you were only inches apart. "i almost wonder if my ex would've fallen for you too."
you're dizzy from being so close to her, mind playing catch up. "t-too?"
"yeah. hideki fell for you. i wonder if you could just have my whole family wrapped around your finger."
you gulp, not really following, just letting her do whatever she wanted to you.
she leans in even closer, eyes dropping to your lips.
"what about me?"
"w-what about you?"
"you rejected deki. how about me?"
you inhale shakily, "are you confessing?"
she smiles then, "was it not obvious?"
"no." you breathe out.
"why not?"
"you're too- you're unbelievable."
"what does that mean?"
"i literally can't believe you're real. that someone as perfect as you could exist."
sana giggles lowly at that, "there it is. do you know how long i've been waiting for you to just say how you feel about me?"
"w-what?"
"all that teasing, all the flirting, i paid nayeon to fake sick y'know?"
"you what?!"
she throws her head back, laughing fully now. your eyes follow the lines of her throat.
"deki talked about you all the time at home. i was curious to meet the maths teacher he was so obsessed with. and then i did. and you were just so adorable. i could tell you really loved what you were doing, and you really cared for all the kids. but i didn't want to ask you out in front of my son who has the biggest most obvious crush on you. so i resigned myself to thinking i probably wouldn't be able to see you again. and then you happened to be on this trip. so i tried everything i could to get closer to you, get to know you better, and you didn't disappoint. i can safely say i'm just as obsessed with you as hideki is, dare i say even more."
"y-you are?"
"mhm. and i knew you liked me too. you're almost as obvious as deki is." she giggles, "i was just waiting for you to do something about it. but you're too nice aren't you? didn't want anything that could be between us to affect your job and your relationship with the kids."
you hadn't even noticed sana had paid so much attention to you. she had picked you apart completely, you felt so exposed in front of her now, but it wasn't unwelcome, you were just embarrassed at the way you've acted around her, thinking how many times you've replied dumbly or said something stupid while she knew you had a crush on her. you cringe at the memories.
sana laughs again, poking at the scrunch in your nose, "so can you say it officially now?"
"say what?"
"don't play dumb with me. you know."
you whine, blushing still, but close your eyes, taking a breath again, "i like you sana. i think you're the most beautiful person i've ever seen and your personality and actions are just as consistent with your looks."
sana giggles again, and then all of a sudden, her lips are pressed against yours.
it's soft, sweet, she's curling a hand around your waist and the other around your neck. you weren't the greatest with words, that's why nayeon was the english teacher, but you try make up for it with your actions, pulling her into you deeper and wrapping your arms around her, smiling into the kiss.
sana returns the smile, reattaching your lips, kissing you easily, your lips slotting together with no rush, taking as much time as you wanted to explore each other.
that night, when you come out of your shower, you find sana curled up in your bed, patting the empty space next to her for you to squeeze into, making sure she had enough space so that she wouldn't fall off the edge. you find that she's a big cuddler, not that it should've surprised you, she was always a very physically affectionate person, and you were still getting used to being on the receiving end of all of it, but you adored it.
the next morning, you'll keep to your promise and wake sana up with a gentle kiss on her lips, brushing her hair out of her face and studying her sleeping features carefully, committing everything to memory, still in slight disbelief that such a woman felt the same way you did.
you talk over breakfast, finding yourself much more at ease now that you knew she knew how you felt about her. she still takes every opportunity to tease you though, loving the way you blushed and stuttered around her.
what's hard is deciding what to do after you get home. you still wanted to keep your distance from hideki so that he could get over you, and sana agreed, saying it would be best if the both of you kept your relationship a secret for now. she was almost excited, talking about how it would be exciting and fun to sneak around like kids again, having to hide your relationship.
she's right of course, but being with her specifically probably makes it ten times harder than it normally would. she'd come to your school with bunches of flowers and lunch, acting innocent and surprised when you have to hide her and find an empty classroom for you to spend the lunch date she springs on you. she'll never stop loving to tease you.
you finally tell hideki about 2 months into your relationship. he seems to take it okay, but when you're curled up in sana's bed later, she tells you he complained to her about how she 'stole his woman', and you both end up in a giggling fit, laughing at the turn of events. regardless, you're still grateful, grateful you were able to meet her, and somehow bewitch her into falling for you. you were the luckiest person alive, and only sana would disagree, saying that was only true for herself.
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