"I Wouldnât Be So Sure".
On Identity, Transformation, and Ascended Astarion
I was taking some screenshots and revisiting the ascension scene, along with Tav/Durgeâs transformation into a spawn, for this little reflection I wrote about the âdegrading lineâ (HERE), when I came across a dialogue option that immediately made me stop and think.
Astarion has just ascended, and heâs positively intoxicated by his newfound power.
When you speak to him after the ritual, one of Tav/Durgeâs dialogue options sheds light on what I think is the million-dollar questionâthe one almost everyone who has thought seriously about Ascended Astarion has probably asked themselves at least once.
Here are the screenshots straight from the game, along with the Vampire Ascendantâs response.
Iâve always maintained that Act 1 Astarion is not the same person as either Radiant Hopeful Astarion or the Vampire Ascendant.
Iâve always thought his transformation throughout the story could be exploredâand explainedâon multiple levels, as I also argued HERE and HERE: from a screenwriting perspective, a real-world perspective, a psychological standpoint, and through the lens of D&D lore. And I still believe that, by the way.
And yet, these lines, which I had completely forgotten about, seem to suggest something different. Almost⌠magical. At the very least, it suggests something far deeper than I had previously thought.
To be clear, Iâm merely exploring different possibilities here. I donât have a definitive answer, nor do I claim to. I underline that I still stand by what Iâve previously written on this subject.
Now, I personally think ambiguity is central to Ascended Astarionâs characterization, and this exchange is no exception. He never actually explains what he means, and perhaps heâs simply boasting. But his response seems to suggest that the transformation goes beyond merely gaining the powers and benefits granted by the pact with Mephistopheles.
And honestly, it makes me wonder just how profoundly the ritual may have altered him.
The most immediate level of interpretation is, of course, the physical one: the change in his body. Heâs talking about his blood, albeit with an air of mystery surrounding it. And we know for certain that some of those changes are already real. His senses have clearly been heightenedâthe Whispers of the Night are a perfect example. Not to mention that he has regained a heartbeat, a reflection, the ability to walk beneath the sun, and all the appetites of the living, as Raphael puts it.
But on another level, what makes his response significant is not so much what he says, but what he is responding to. Tav/Durge isnât really asking whether he is biologically different. The question goes far beyond that.
They already take the ritualâs obvious effects into account. By saying âjust stronger,â they acknowledge that Ascension has granted Astarion greater power. That part is already accepted. Itâs not what concerns them. On top of that, Raphael had already made it very clear what the ritual would grant Astarionâand what it demanded in return.
What they really mean is: âAre you still you?â Are you still the same person I fell in love with? Do you still think the same way? Do you still feel the same things? Are your values, your heart, your identity still your own? Or has this power changed not only what you are, but who you are? Itâs almost a plea for reassurance.
And Astarion doesnât provide that reassurance.
He says neither yes nor no. He shifts the conversation from identity to biology.
To me, that feels like a deliberate narrative choice, because the writers could easily have had him answer, âOf course Iâm still me.â Instead, they deliberately leave the question unresolved.
And that brings me back to the same kind of transformation undergone by whichever characterâKarlach or Tav/Durgeâchooses to become a Mind Flayer.
Not because Ascension and ceremorphosis are equivalent, but because they ultimately ask the same question: does identity survive transformation? Both invite the player to confront the same philosophical dilemma. And in both cases, the writers deliberately avoid offering a definitive answer, instead leaving us to wrestle with that ambiguity.
In any case, Iâll leave you with another screenshot in which, once again, Astarionâs dialogue doesnât quite reveal the full extent of what he means by "everything". Status? Power? Biology? Or perhaps something else entirely?
I genuinely donât know.
And I canât help but think the writers wanted it that way.
