interrobanged

It has come to my attention that some of you have never seen what I firmly believe to be the greatest music video of all time: Bonnie Tyler’s Total Eclipse of the Heart. It is the perfect marriage of a galactically bombastic power ballad and a writhing mass of 1980s video clichés, thrown into the path of a wind machine and blasted down a moodily lit corridor into the realm of legend.

In case you’re wondering what the heck they were thinking of when they made it, I remember Bonnie once explaining on TV that it’s about the dreams of a headmaster’s daughter, hence all the boys in (and out of) uniform. In retrospect, the whole shebang is quite fascinatingly female gaze-y, and I’m pretty sure it was a major formative influence on my pubescent imagination.

Have a sex drive

Support other people's right to have sex

Support other people's rights to talk about and/or depict sex and sexuality

Engage with art explicitly depicting and/or discussing sex and sexuality

Create art that explicitly depicts and/or discusses sex and sexuality

Beat someone to death with your bare hands in the dead of night

Grapple with what you've done as lights flash in the distance

Dig a shallow grave

As you lay the last shovel-full of dirt, catch the glint of metal in the corner of your eye

Rush toward the gun, eyes wild and shovel forgotten

Grapple less figuratively, fighting to get the upper hand, clawing with teeth and dirt-covered bloody nails

Kill a second person with your bare hands

So some fanartist drew a “sexy” (read: booby) version of a (cartoon) character who is traditionally very non-sexualised. Fans of the character got mad about it because it’s kind of groundbreaking how that character is written and portrayed and this art totally ignores the entire point of the character. They demanded the art be deleted. In response to that other people said, well what the fanartist did may be distateful but they have every right to draw what they’re into. The two sides fight for days and each starts a harassment campaign and even report their “opponents’” accounts.

So far so typical. But things eventually come to a head and they decide that this will be settled by votes - not through a poll. Through donations to a children’s education charity via each side’s portal. Whoever can get the highest amount of donation wins.