Somerset

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Eudial belongs to Sailor Moon . Artwork by Meredith McClaren

BUT ALSO!! Right now libraries are facing a problem with a new policy from  very large publisher called Macmillan that’s due to be enacted in November. 

As Jessamyn West explains in her article on CNN:

For the first two months after a Macmillan book is published, a library can only buy one copy, at a discount. After eight weeks, they can purchase “expiring” e-book copies which need to be re-purchased after two years or 52 lends. As publishers struggle with the continuing shake-up of their business models, and work to find practical approaches to managing digital content in a marketplace overwhelmingly dominated by Amazon, libraries are being portrayed as a problem, not a solution. Libraries agree there’s a problem – but we know it’s not us.

52 lends is nothing when it comes to popular books. In essence, this new policy would require libraries to re-purchase the same eBooks over and over just to continue to provide access to their readers. 

Libraries already have to go through a lot of hoops and extra expense to provide digital content, and this policy will just make it even harder, more time consuming, and more expensive, thus making it more difficult for libraries to provide eBooks at a time when demand for eBook access at libraries is growing exponentially. Both the ALA and the PLA have come out strongly against thus policy, and it sets a TERRIBLE precedence for other publishing houses and future policies. It’s a bad idea that’s expensive and ultimately punishes the people who need libraries the most.

But YOU can do something about it, right now! Help us tell Macmillan publishing that their new policy is terrible and will adversely affect the people who need digital library access the most! 

Check out the ALA’s action page for some great graphics and an auto-tweet form that will let you voice your displeasure to Macmillan directly. 

Or you can just copy and paste it into Twitter from here, and add the graphic too if you want: 

Limiting access to new titles for libraries means limiting access for readers who are most dependent on libraries. @MacmillanUSA’s new policy is unacceptable, John Sargent. Cancel the embargo. #eBooksForAll

—a woman from a telepathic race based on anglerfish shows up in the ER in a panic because her mate, who is tiny and permanently attached to her body, has stopped communicating through their telepathic link

—the air-breathing doctors have to take over the aquatic ward after a mysterious illness spreads through the water-breathing staff

—an ambulance brings in an unconscious alien from a species totally outside of medical literature, the staff scramble to save their life while flying blind

Doc Hive

Dr Doe and Caddie (who I imagine isnt a doctor but just hangs around and listens to metal in the morgue a lot)

Dr Fred, and Nessie

Dr Lagoon

when presented with a dude who looks somehow eerily identical to his adopted siblings while sharing none of the same genetic features, a dude whose adopted siblings are apparently all dating each other, a dude whose family never socializes with other students, is never seen around town, NEVER EATS, a dude whose entire family is super dedicated to attendance and punctuality but just straight up LEAVES TOWN on sunny days,

Bella thought “could he be….Spiderman?”

THAT SAID, yes, it’s totally ridiculous that Twilight takes place in high school. I think the concept itself would have been 100% more entertaining if Bella had been a a junior transfer student from a southwest community college to University of Washington in Seattle, commuting every day from Forks, where she finds out the weird dude from her college chem lab lives too (I’ve commuted 40+ minutes to school, it’s doable).

Not only is this more believable, but it would also be a lot more entertaining and potentially funny for Bella to just slowly realize she has at least one class a week with each of these weird-ass pale kids from her hometown.

Edward’s in chem with her. She accidentally sits down next to Rosalie in calc before she recognizes the resemblance. Emmet’s an overwhelmingly enthusiastic Fitness Management major who starts sitting next to her in Western Civ after he notices her talking to Edward. “Are you pre-med? You seem like you might be pre-med. My dad’s a doctor!”

Alice tries desperately to help her in a wheel-tossing class Bella had to take as an art elective after she put off choosing an art elective until it was the only one left. She asks herself daily why she didn’t take Art History. Jasper is there too. He doesn’t look like he’d be into pottery, but it seems like he’s into anything Alice is into (I still argue it’s literally impossible that he functions in public at all, but we’ll roll with it anyway).

Make Esme a professor at the school, too. Adorable. She’s that Mom Professor everyone loves and and respects (and also sort of fears). She always excuses absences as long as you send an email.

Instead of collecting graduation caps and gowns, they collect degrees.

Imagine Emmet bringing up the time he was almost a doctor, but having to actually be around the patients ended it. Carlisle says “I warned you the entire time you were in undergrad.”

After a few weeks of plot devices similar to the actual book (near-death parking lot experiences, etc.), Bella runs into Esme at the grocery store in Forks (I actually love that they buy groceries) and realizes my god, these people live here?

It would also make more sense that Bella were moving back in with her dad despite hating the Pacific Northwest so intensely. None of that sort of quirky “minor league baseball” stuff. She absolutely Would Not live in a dorm with some random roommate, so going to school where she could live with her dad was about all that made sense. The in-state tuition to a great university was just an added bonus.

It would also make the romance more enjoyable. NOW, a lot of people complain that a 100+ year old would have no reason to be interested in a high schooler in the original series, but I believe it’s very implied that all of the Vampires aren’t just physically frozen at their age, but they’re mentally and emotionally stuck forever as well.

Which is, you know, horrible. That’s why some of them are so damn angsty and emotionally volatile. That’s why Bella insists that Edward turn her sooner than later. Bruh, if you wait until she’s 25, she’s going to out-grow your maturity-level.

STILL, I think a romance between 21-23 year olds would have been better, by a little bit.

It would also make a lot more sense for them to be in college because of the way they function. They wouldn’t all be eating (or not eating) together in the only cafeteria as the entire student-body tried to pretend to not stare.

Less people would notice their eerie resemblance, their coordinated absences, and their overall weirdness, which would make more apparent Bella’s alleged super-strong powers of observation when she started putting things together.

Instead of there randomly being a sudden spike in criminals in that little town, Edward could dramatically rescue Bella’s naive ass from a party her human friends dragged her to.

Freddie imitates Life imitates Art

When you go to The Met (NYC) for the afternoon, open your backpack for security, notice that you still have your brother’s Christmas present with you, and realize that your afternoon is about to go from good to great!

I figured you’d all appreciate my fun.

BONUS:

Most of the medical research was done on white males and their response to medicine. This is why medical books should only serve as a framework but clinical expertise matters more.

Emerald is probably still hunting down Lars and the Off-Colors

Some closure on that whole Jasper and Lapis thing now that Lapis is a full time Crystal Gem and Jasper is back

Rescuing the Zoomans and reintegrating them back to Earth

The hundreds of actual Rose Quartz gems bubbled up on the Zoo are still there and could probably be set free now

We still don’t know what Rose/Pink was keeping in the chest in Lion’s mane

The fate of Blue Zircon, Lemon Jade, and the Topaz fusion were left up in the air

Homeworld is still facing a resource crisis and is literally split in half and hanging on by threads

And Lars is effectively immortal and he’ll totally outlive everyone