[Source / Make One]
An image of a pale-skinned hand holding a dark purple plum is centered against a pale blue background. Meme-formatted text reads “Parenting is so exhausting,” across the top and, “I don’t know how people with fewer than 3 co-parents manage it!,” across the bottom.
When people talk casually about polyamory, I always feel like this is a point that gets missed a lot. Everyone is worried about adult fulfillment in relationships that are built on trust, communication, and understanding.
But where is the discussion about family?
Like, everyone understands there’s a community element to poly, because we have to build a safe place to express our personal dynamic. That’s a great topic, but every community SURVIVES based on the next generation. We can’t just talk about individual relationships without discussing the village aspect of raising the offspring of those relationships.
I personally believe that one of the greatest boons of poly is that we can share the joy of parenthood beyond the forced dynastic model of post-agrarian America. Like, we live in this community and we have all these connections, this wonderful web of support, this should be a boon larger than individual fulfillment. Instead, we have an opportunity to bring together a loving atmosphere with many different walks-of-life and, more importantly, perspective to the act of raising children.
Parenthood is a heavy task, and no one would deny extra help along the way is always a bounty. Maybe it’s because we evolved to be a more communal species and it really is true that it takes a village to raise a child. Maybe we should have more of THESE kinds of talks than just about how we manage jealousy.
I think this speaks to a larger issue: how a community handles it’s less-abled members.  I think kids are kind of a special case for less-abled people.
