picket

ohhh yes. the vasio ask that drives me crazy and makes me start hurting myself and others (/REFERENCE). i've had this open rereading it for so long formulating my thoughts on it .. tl;dr youre soooo right.

YES i fucking love vasio survival aus specifically BECAUSE of how strenuous it is at the beginning. i can't see it going any other way, and that's even as someone who views vasya's motives as being a little more complex than just wanting ogata dead (and someone who views ogata as being interested in vasya, not to the extent of vasya's obsession with her, but still). not sure how everyone else does it but in my survival aus, ogata still goes through everything on the train, giant epiphany -> attempts to khs but doesn't hit her mark exactly. still falls off the train though so when vasya finds her she's got like a million broken bones and is bruised and bleeding all over and HONESTLY. she may be a prideful creature but in that moment of weakness, when she is so overcome with mental anguish and completely shattered, i think she begs vasya to kill her. and he doesn't because he's the sniper and he gets to choose when she dies SMHHHH!!!!!!!! and i think she really fucking hates him for that. i think, if nothing else, she hates him for keeping her alive.

w/ what you said about it feeling Wrong with them acting as traveling companions ... yes!! yes fucking absolutely. even if ogata has had her grand epiphany about not being a broken person, she definitely still has the habit of dehumanizing herself a la only thinking of herself in relation of her sniping skills/as a weapon ... and vasily hasn't even had any prompting to unpack that whatsoever so he might be even WORSE in that regard. so what happens when you put two PTSD-ridden, paranoid war vets who haven't learned how to live like Humans yet around the same campfire, or worse, riding on the same horse...? well. it's awful. they're both completely clueless and i think it's especially nervewracking for ogata because she deadass doesn't know what vasya Wants from her. she's been under the assumption he's out to kill her because of what she took from him, and now he's just (somewhat) chilling sharing scraps of food with her...? the FUCK? it freaks her out because she Needs to know what he wants because she Needs to play into that, to keep him captivated enough that he sticks around (and to subtly, desperately try to regain control of her situation). and i think with her mental stability at the very least significantly weakened she does have outbursts occasionally relating to this, and they definitely do fight (as well as they can, anyways).

GODDDDDDDDDD VASYA ACTUALLY HAVING AN INTROSPECTION MOMENT .... i love love love how you worded this so much, 10/10 no notes you're so fucking right. he definitely has a streak of justifying himself in doing these things - 'i was worried for her' 'i can't trust her on her own' , etc etc - and i think that'd make his realization hit even harder ... maybe he connects his own justifications to the kinds of justifications he has heard before, from other men he has disliked if not had to deal with their shit PERSONALLY ... i think it's really fucking interesting to explore the idea of vasya trying so hard to adopt a masculine role, to become the Protector and the Head of the House, that he uncritically picks up some of the less favorable traits of that time, too, and he has to grapple with that fact. he has to choose if he wants to be society's idea of a Good, Hard-Working Man or ogata's idea of a Good, Hard-Working Man ... and knowing how he is i think we all know which one he would choose. it'd be hard but it'd be a fascinating moment of growth for him i think.

Honestly, Vasya achieving such levels of introspection of his own behavior and their dynamic (+what is expected as ideals of Man and Woman) already makes him a top percentile among men. He is an artist; he is very skilled at picking up themes and patterns. Now that he has a shoulder injury and he'll NEVER get to shoot with the same precision and ease as before, at least not without extensive and painful physical therapy he doesn't really have access to living in that time period (and he'll get an identity crisis about it), he is going to lean into his CONCEPTUALIZATION skill.

I can only hope I can get back to writing someday, but them learning to coexist is something that intrigues me so much. When things somewhat settle between them, it must look so Odd from outside. What an strange couple! The way Ogata introduces Vasily during their travels varies greatly with her moods. Some options:

Neutral leaning on distant/annoyed: This is my traveling companion.

Neutral leaning on content: This is my hunting partner.

Saleswoman's pitch: This is Master Vasily Danilovich Pavlichenko, and I'm his representative.

Extremely playful, ragebait queen in a fondness spell: This is my deformed pet bear. Originally, I was going to sell it to a glue factory, but it amuses me. It paints, and shoots, and has been learning basic commands in Japanese. Despite my best efforts, though, it is yet to get a grip on how to wash itself like a person, but we'll get there eventually.

Being nonviolent is an important part of their character, and while it's interesting to ponder what could drive them to feel vindication or relief through violence, them doing so can't truly be construed as a positive development

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