Secret Machines

I just needed to let this out of me, at least on my blog instead of ranting it out on someone (you wouldnt even want that). 

I tried to hide everything, covered it all with laughter and smiles, but  still, every time I am left alone, I cant help it but think of those days when I thought taking all those risks would actually be worth it. Of all the persons I've met, you were the only who never seize to make me feel confused with everything until I give up and just let everything pass, act like nothing happened. Pretend that everything's okay with me. I admit it, I'm afraid to know the answers, it seems that it's okay with me to wonder until I get tired of it all...and then it came to me..I settled.

Risks, ups and downs, realizations, etc..

I dont know if regret is the right word but I hate how the risks taken were trashed away..