ｓｉｎｇ

blaine: Enchanting Delight™?

blaine: I have trouble believing you met /my/ mom. i'm not saying she's not a decent, kind, loving woman but that might be going a little far.

blaine: if you ever became my Big Daddy you'd never see me home for the holidays. or ever again.

blaine: how and when, exactly, did you meet/speak with my mother?

sebastian: are you doubting my authenticity, blaine anderson?

sebastian: i'll have you know that i just HAPPENED to stop by your place with a few bottles of wine to see if you would be interested in partaking.

sebastian: we didn't save any for you, but there is a very delicious croissant in the green bag on the counter

sebastian: you're welcome

sebastian: i took the liberty of telling your mother that you are a cold and callous man who despite my best efforts doesn't appear to want to "wife me" as all the kids say

sebastian: she said that she'd speak to you about it

initially all blaine did was huff and send sebastian an indignant look. ‘telling me you’ve been lying and then insulting me won’t exactly help your case, sebastian!’ soon the realization hit and he paused. there was a moment of hesitance before inching closer. ‘do you want me to dress up as nightbird? because i can right now -’

sebastian: you are the WORST sort of person!

sebastian: why didn't you ever tell me your mother was an Enchanting Delight™?

sebastian: honestly blaine if i wasn't so gay i'd marry her on the spot.

‘remember that time i decided to pack my bags and leave you because you can’t seem to understand that when i say never speak of this again, you never speak of it again?’

oooo look who showed up after an unplanned month-long hiatus with nothing but some mildly flat diet pepsi and leftover spicy tuna rolls! it’s fifi, bitches!!! anyway, we’ve got some super important announcements since i’m changing things up a bit on this blog. 

basically my muse for glee is shot. it’s been a wild five years but my heart belongs elsewhere and because of that this indie isn’t running as smoothly as my other ones. i can still get it up (so to speak), but i might be a bit more selective than i originally planned. it’s literally not you, it’s me. 

i’m going to be dropping threads other than a few - if your heart is super set on continuing then let me know and i’ll do what i can. otherwise i’ll be easing myself back in as things come to me. 

thanks so much for understanding, y’all!

PSA i hate @ofgleefuldisposition . that’s all.

if he wasn’t on the verge of a mental breakdown, he probably would have noticed that sebastian seemed unaffected by it all. that would have been the first sign to getting out of this with quinn only as collateral damage that would be forgotten by the next school year, and he’d have moved on to college and the life he wanted to make for himself would go as planned.

but all he could focus on was his hands, and then sebastian’s eyes. how could someone as pretty as sebastian ever do something with cruel intentions? they hadn’t known each other long, but he still couldn’t not believing that he was going to help him. sebastian’s mouth was moving, but it was almost muffled, taking a second for blaine to actually understand him. it wasn’t that sebastian could suddenly calm him down; he was still shaking and trying to remember how to breathe, but being told to focus had him at least aware enough to do what he was told. ‘a note? why would she…’ just as he went to ask what that meant, it dawned on him, and how could he argue? frame it as suicide or spend the rest of his life in jail, and blaine anderson wouldn’t last a day behind bars. a life without hair gel? disaster.

blaine forced the pen now in his hand to stop moving as he hovered over the paper. he needed steady hands, and after a few deep breaths, he started to write, keeping quinn’s voice in his head the best he could. blaine’s luck was that he, at least, paid attention when she rambled. he knew what was going on in her head, or not - for the most part, and suddenly he had a full page, signed with quinn’s name. his gaze slowly moved up to sebastian. ‘… now what?’

sebastian sighed in deep exasperation as he shook blaine just a tiny bit harder. ‘earth to blaine, darling. you just killed a girl. if you want to get out of this you need to find a story that people will like. change the narrative.’  he could practically see when the realization hit blaine. 

he read over blaine’s shoulder, lips pressed tightly together. blaine knew her best, didn’t he? it certainly seemed that way - or perhaps blaine was more of an artist than he anticipated. either way he was only about sixty percent sure that it’d work. a little risk was worth it. ohio could be so exciting.

‘good boy.’ sebastian patted blaine’s head, not even grimacing at the sticky residue it left on his palm.’now we’re going to leave and forget we were ever here. do you have a lot of black in your wadrobe? let’s go shopping. you can watch me change, killer.’

not even a dead body could keep sebastian from dwelling on blaine’s thunder thighs.

‘what’s wrong with hanging out with me in public?’ there was an almost pitiful look in his eyes, suddenly. ‘is it the hair? the chinos? the bowties? my need to please? the constant singing - okay, i suppose i get it.’ he huffed, crossing his arms over his chest. ‘i like hanging out with you! even if it’s mostly just you insulting me. do we ever do anything else? i can’t really remember.’

‘i think you just answered your own question.’ santana rolled her eyes - but she did manage to avoid placing a pillow over his big mouth, so it could be said that she had some sense of charity. ‘of course we do other things. you feed me, for one. and i protect you from the horrifying reality of being you in a small town. honestly, i think you should be thanking me on a daily basis.’

‘will it still count if it’s covered in salt and butter?’ that was the only thing blaine could think of to respond with at first, the pout that had been glued onto his lips for days remained as he rolled his head to actually look at him. ‘i’m talking to you. you’re not a puppet… at least - i don’t think so? i haven’t hit that low yet. and i wouldn’t put you in that outfit. i like you in blue.’ embarrassment and offense hit him all at once when his hair was mentioned. it was likely a mixture of the two, but he still couldn’t help but let out a huff. ‘natural grease helps it all stick down easier. don’t give me that look!’

‘BLAINE!’ the best friend gig sucked. blaine was going to die covered in his own filthy and malnourished and kurt was going to have to tell pam that her son died requesting extra butter for his deep fried vegetables. ‘i look beautiful in every color, but compliments wont get you anywhere until you at least brush your teeth.’ he crossed his arms across his chest as he stood over blaine. ‘i’m not looking at you in any way you don’t entirely deserve.’

‘so you’re some kind of performer then? If you’re looking to give impromptu, free concerts, i’d suggest standing in the courtyard. you’d get plenty of attention there and people would be able to hear you more. awesome. i have classes at 9:30, so if you held off till at least 9, that would be great. um, strange? define strange? strange like crazy or strange as in he’s doing random things he’d normally not do? if I’m the opposite of his type, what makes you think he and I would actually work? i don’t think that plan would go over very well, but um, is he a wine guy? and what kind?’

‘as delightful as free concerts sound, i have a very complicated history with them. maybe some other time. at least 9? strange like i suspect he is very lonely and very sad. he’s perfectly sane, never you mind that. his type appears to be small, emotional, and perhaps a bit... i don’t know how to phrase this. artistic? i figured if he found someone tall and strong and not competition... you see where i’m going with this. i’m sure anything you bring will be perfect.’ 

@ofgleefuldisposition where are u <3<3<3

if you asked blaine if he had tucked away in the comfort of his apartment building for twenty days straight, he would deny it to the ends of the earth. sam, however, would butt in to make sure you knew that he had been forced to get take out, and groceries, and clean, and it was the hardest twenty days of his life. blaine had to make sure it was safe. that, under no circumstances, he was not going to run into sebastian again.

new york was a big enough city. the chances of them actually being forced to speak again was slim to none. he’d find new restaurants to eat at, a new coffee shop - every location was brand new. he vaguely recognized how childish that might have been, but, well, no one would really know he was going out of his way.

he was merely passing by the park. it happened to be the route he took to his new favorite bakery - the cronuts even better than the last, surprisingly. he had his gaze on his phone, but the jingling of their dog collars was such a familiar sound, he couldn’t help but look up. or over and down, to see his two favorite dogs, and he was kneeling down before they even made it to him. blaine hadn’t thought about the lanky man that should be chasing after him. his thoughts were completely on them, cooing and praising as they licked his face and danced their paws across his thighs. he’d almost found himself in a whole new world. and then he heard it.

sebastian’s voice, and the grin almost slipped from his face. he kept his gaze on the dogs for a minute, letting out an awkward laugh in response. ‘no, its okay! i know well enough by now how to get a little dog drool and dirt off my pants.’ reluctantly, he lifted his gaze, the corner of his lips pulling up. ‘it’s… good to see you. did you get taller?’

at least the dogs are happy, sebastian thought sourly. he was honestly beginning to think he should just get some cats. at least then he wouldn’t be in this horrific situation. ‘i think it’s just because you’re on your knees,’ he said as he crouched down enough to leash both dogs. 

but he couldn’t quite find it in him to leave yet. all the books say it takes twenty-one days to develop a new habit. maybe that was why. ‘they really missed you, you know. eloise had to go on a new diet and i’m pretty sure she blames me for it.’ and it was so hard to deny them anything when sebastian himself had eaten a pint of ice cream every few days. 

‘are you here with someone?’

brittany turns on the webcam and leans back. ‘and this week on fondue for two we have a very special guest.’ lord tubbington walks into frame and britt sighs, knowing that editing out cat buttholes is going to eat at her free time tonight. ‘is it true that when you touch someone you also make them gay? i couldn’t get test subjects, but we can take it to the street.’

panic and bile rise in dave’s throat, but he keeps his face perfectly BLANK. ‘is this some kind of joke, fanc? cause i’m not laughing.’