https://href.li/?https://www.pixiv.net/stacc/menkichi

I'm going to make my response it's own post because I think the point is important

-

As someone who is autistic and has BPD and CPTSD and loads of trauma yes you sometimes need to change how you interact with others to keep people around

When I was 13 I hit the few friends I had when I was angry

I had to change that in order to keep those friendships

When I was in my early 20s if I was losing an disagreement with my husband I would threaten to kill myself. My husband told me it hurt him and was cruel and manipulative behaviour, because it was.

So I worked hard to change that to keep my relationship

It's easy to say "I shouldn't have to change for others" and that's true to an extent. You shouldn't change your interests or passions or dim your light. And you should have space to be imperfect and flawed and not have to pretend your ugly bits aren't real. But if something you are doing it causing other people harm you kinda need to change that.

That's called "living in a society"

People adapt to each other and make space for each other in their lives. You adapt to them and they adapt to you

You start being more diligent about throwing away the empty toilet roll because it really bothers them. They start warning you before they run the blender because you hate loud noises

I stopped threatening to kill myself because I was mad I was losing an argument and my husband stopped being so vocally judgemental amount media he personally dislikes

There is a certain type of person who heard the phrase "your emotions are valid" and took that to mean "my emotional reactions and my behaviour are always objectively correct because my emotions are valid and if you have an emotional response or react to what I'm doing negatively then you are wrong and you can't be hurt because my emotions are valid"

And that's a recipe for disaster

Your emotions are valid to feel. They are how you feel and there are reasons you feel the way you do

However, your reactions and behaviour are something you can learn to control and can be irrational

4/26/24 - Biden/Harris administration incorporates latest rule to the ACA that includes protections on the basis of sexual orientation and improves pre-existing protections for gender identity, mandating nondiscrimination in health care and insurance coverage for LGBTQ+ Americans.

4/19/24 - Biden/Harris administration finalized a Title IX rule that clarifies the scope of nondiscrimination protections on the basis of sexual orientation and gender identity throughout educational activities and programs.

1/9/24 - Biden/Harris administration reverses Trump/Pence era “License to Discriminate” rules.

6/8/23 - Biden personally announces a series of initiatives that include efforts to protect queer and trans foster youth, improve access to mental health services for LGBTQ+ youth and address the rise in hate-fueled violence.

4/26/23 - Biden/Harris administration files lawsuit against the state of Tennessee, challenging the constitutionality of recently enacted legislation banning age-appropriate, medically necessary gender-affirming care for transgender youth.

2/7/23 - Biden uses his SotU address to encouraged Congress to pass the Equality Act “to ensure LGBTQ Americans, especially transgender young people, can live with safety and dignity.”

12/13/22 - Biden signs the Respect for Marriage Act, one of the biggest legislative wins in the fight for LGBTQ+ equality in over a decade, guaranteeing federal rights, benefits and obligations of marriages in the federal code for same-sex couples. The legislation also repealed the Defense of Marriage Act and affirmed public acts, records and proceedings should be recognized by all states.

8/4/22 - Biden/Harris administration declares Monkeypox a public emergency and wields federal power to ensure equal access in the distribution of vaccines and treatment.

3/21/22 - Biden/Harris administration takes steps on Transgender Day of Visibility to protect trans Americans that includes issuing passports with an “X” gender marker, streamlining identity verification during the travel experience and providing resources to transgender kids and their families.

And that’s just the last two years, without including any educational or research work done towards new policies or educating Americans about LGBTQ identities and politics, like displaying parts of the AIDS quilt in the White House or regularly acknowledging Pride, days of visibility, or other issues within the community.

Or his lawyers arguing, while he was in office, that employers fully should be allowed to fire people for being gay.

I also don't think enough people remember various military leaders, and thus entire units, -literally ignoring orders- in order to protect trans service members.