𝐍 𝐞 𝐯 𝐚 𝐞 𝐡. ᢉ𐭩

Peculiar Signs

✧ a/n: these two are NEVER careful

✧ Contains: fluff, Jackson's mentioned (excluding j*e) sex mentioned, kissing, unexpected pregnancy

✧ wc: 2.5k // masterlist

Till this day you still couldn’t believe you and Michael have been dating for quite some time now. To the point where you occasionally stay in Hayvenhurst — now ever since Michael left for his thriller album tour, you were more than welcome to stay at his place.

The Jacksons pretty much treated you as one of their own, so they were more than welcome once you’ve decided to stay for a couple weeks while your boyfriend is gone. 

One morning you woke up in Michael’s bedroom, once the sun peaked from the curtains — hitting your eyes, you lay awake. You yawn, sitting up straight as you rubbed your eye. Still feeling a bit drowsy from your sleep, suddenly you felt your stomach turning.

You felt queasy, then suddenly you have the urge to run to the nearest bathroom and empty your stomach. Wiping your mouth confusingly, wondering what made you feel this way.

After a little thinking, you remembered just yesterday you and Rebbie had gone to a restaurant, one where you consumed new cuisine you haven’t tried before, you concluded that you could’ve been food poisoned. 

Later that morning, you had just gotten home from a morning walk. As you enter inside — La toya startled you, you quickly shut the door with a sigh of relief. “Hey, I'm heading out! Do you wanna come with me?” La Toya asked, “no thank you I’m fine” you rubbed the back of your neck. 

La Toya gave you a second look, one where your brows furrowed realizing she was really inspecting you “Is… there something in my face?” you asked half jokingly, “sorry it’s just — did you get back from the salon or something?” La Toya asked.

“Uhm… no, i just got home from a walk why —?” you wondered yourself, “this might sound random but you're glowing today” La Toya pointed out looking amazed. “Really…? You know I did start using this moisturiser I got from Marlon’s girlfriend, judging by your reaction it must've worked great” you speculated.

After taking a nice bath in the afternoon, you put on your casual clothes and head downstairs. You ran to the kitchen, finding Katherine and Dee Dee doing their cooking for tonight's dinner. “Need any extra help?” you asked enthusiastically “of course hon, why don’t you start cutting up these veggies” Katherine pointed to the cutting board. You nodded and started washing all the ingredients, and started cutting. 

A minute or two later, while you were focused on cutting, you couldn’t help but smell something odd. You thought it was nothing serious — but the scent started to grow, and it was starting to bother you severely. “Hey what’s that smell…?” You politely asked, “probably this chicken, smells good doesn't it” Dee Dee pointed proudly as she takes it out of the oven,

You started to cover your nose as the scent became stronger, “...n-no I don’t think that’s it…” you shook your head aggressively. The mysterious scent was too much for you to handle — you started feeling nauseous, you then instinctively rushed over to the bathroom, vomiting your guts out.

Katherine rushed to the opened bathroom door with worry “sweetie are you okay? What on earth happened” she asked, you cleared out your throat and looked over by your shoulder. “...forgive me Katherine but — I think there might be some expired ingredients or something… i’m not so sure, but I could tell by the smell of it…” you trailed off, vomiting once more. “Oh it must’ve been the fish — i knew i couldn’t trust the new store i’ve gone too” Katherine assumed as she walked out. 

It was strange you vomited more than once today, but your mind was completely fuzzy — you had no other thought than to assume this was not your day. “Is she alright?” Dee Dee asked, “she’s alright — the fish must’ve been spoiled, that's why the poor thing was feeling nauseous,” Katherine explained.

Dee Dee’s brows furrowed, confused on how that happened since she had been in the kitchen way longer than you have — yet she didn’t smell a thing. She stepped closer to the fish katherin was referring to, she took a quick sniff and after that, she was even more confused — she didn’t smell a thing.

That night the Jackson’s were all sitting in the dining room enjoying dinner. As they all talked, laughed and shared stories, you were sitting at the very edge. You toss and turn your meal with your fork, suddenly you don't feel like having an appetite. You didn’t realize from a short distance Dee Dee was carefully observing you playing with your food — looking disinterested. She chewed and chewed then suddenly, she thought of a possible conclusion.

After dinner, you sit on the living room couch reading some magazines alone while the rest of the family head to their rooms, you then spot Dee Dee approaching you “hey! Dinner was delicious, you did a great job with that chicken” you complimented her as she sat beside you on the couch.

“Was it? I saw you earlier, it looked like you barely ate anything” Dee Dee smiled. You immediately was caught off guard on how quickly she read you like a book “oh! W-well, i wasn’t that hungry actually, i might be missing Mikey a bit too much” you joked, Dee Dee laughed shortly “really? Huh — hey speaking Michael, this might be awfully personal but… when was the last time you two had sex?” she asked with such an unbothered tone.

If you were sipping on a glass of water you would’ve spat it out instantly “i-i’m sorry what?!” you reacted “i said i asked when was that last time–” “yeah i know what you said — you don’t have to repeat it, what’s this about?” you asked confusingly. “It’s just that earlier you threw up, and when Katherined explained it was because of some fish, so i — tried smelling it and it was normal” Dee Dee explained. 

You still sat there cluelessly “... okay? So what — it could’ve been anything else” you excused “yeah that or… you — could be pregnant” Dee Dee dropped the bomb. Your eyes widened and your jaw slightly opened — you were speechless, “right — that’s not possible, no. Me and Michael are always careful”  You argued “You still didn’t answer my question” Dee Dee smilingly declared.

“Last week, just before he was about to leave, see? You can’t get pregnant that fast” You answered, Dee Dee scoffs “alright then — explain why La Toya came up to me earlier talking about how you were glowing” she asked, “I told her I used some moisturiser” you protested. Dee Dee thinked for a moment, her eyes squinted looking directly at you, she trusted her gut and was not about to let go easily.

“What about two weeks ago? Did you and Michael have sex then?” she shot another question, you were in disbelief on how forwarded Dee Dee was being, but nevertheless you tried remembering that day and — yes, without a doubt you and Michael indeed made sweet love in fact more than once throughout the week. “...Okay so what? It was his last few weeks with me — it doesn't change anything, i take the pill seriously” You justified, Dee Dee couldn’t resist slipping out a laugh “honey, just a reminder the pills only work for past sex — not future, so unless you two have it under control in bed, you are most certainly, without a doubt — pregnant” Dee Dee proudly explains.

As Dee Dee continued to chuckle, you started to actually remember all the times you and Michael had sexual intercourse. You both had always tried to keep things intact, but you do have to admit two weeks ago, you were both a bit — out of control, you just couldn’t help yourselves, you knew he was about to be gone for quiet sometime, so you try to make every moment count right?

“Did you feel anything this morning?” Dee Dee asked, snapping you out of your mind. “...well, I… sort of — threw up” you answered with haste, Dee Dee raised her eyebrow with a smirk. “O-only because, the day before, me and Rebbie went out to eat, and i must’ve gotten food poisoning or something” You asserted.

“Or something” Dee Dee teased, you scoff “ It's not funny!”  you shot back like a kid, Dee Dee nearly choked out of laughter, “I’m sorry, but you know I'm only doing this ‘cause I love you. And all of your signs seemed familiar when Tito and I had kids” Dee Dee apologized “sorry for being pushy. One last thing — don’t forget to keep track of your period okay” Dee Dee said before standing up and walking out.

That last line made your heart sink to your stomach, as you saw Dee Dee out of your sight, you ran straight to Michael’s room. You grabbed the calendar on the bedside table, scanning the entire month — you were late. Rushing to the bathroom — you rummaged around through the shelf behind the mirror, finding the pregnancy test unwrapped. You immediately unwrap it without even considering throwing out the packaging. You sit down and do the usual procedure — waiting for the result for a minute or two. 

Positive. Your eyes widened as you clamped your mouth, seeing the tiny plus sign, you were pregnant. Taking a minute to fully process your thoughts, you sat there in the bathroom for the five minutes before walking back to Michael’s room — still having a disbelief expression.

You sat on his bed still not fully awake from the bomb that just dropped, still couldn’t believe it. You glance at the test again to see maybe there was a slight chance you were seeing things. But no, the plus was still there, you slammed your back to the mattress, covering your face — exhaling a long sigh.

Not knowing how to feel, you and Michael had always talked about having kids, and how you’ve always dreamed of becoming a parent, sure — but you both never agreed when. Speaking of Michael, how on earth are you gonna tell him? How will he react? And on his journey climbing to the peak of this career, you’re worried that this potential baby might have other plans.

A few days later, Michael returned home — finished with his tour. He couldn’t contain his excitement reuniting with you again, it had been too long since you’ve seen each other over the past week. He couldn’t wait to kiss you all over, and asked how your week without him has been.

Michael arrived at Hayvenhurst, quickly running out of his car. Once he went inside he was immediately greeted by the family, after he had been showered by hugs and kisses by his mother — Michael turned to you, kissing you long and deeply. “How was the tour?” you asked sincerely.

Hours passed, Michael had completely settled down. You both lay bare in bed, collecting your breaths after you made passionate love to each other. He really missed this.

“So what else happened on the tour?” you asked excitedly, Michael chuckled “enough about me, what about you baby? what did you while i was gone” Michael asked, you hummed finding an answer other then the obvious one.

“The usual…” you quietly answered, Michael laughed at your response. Your smile slowly started to drift hearing Michael laugh joyfully, you knew you can’t keep keeping him in the dark like this — it’s just wrong.

“Hey Mikey…” you sighed, “Yeah what is it?” Michael replied, still having a clueless smile on his face. “You know I love you very much right” you started off light, Michael’s brows furrowed, but he still had a grin on “…yeah of course” 

“And, I know that your career is the most important thing you’ve ever accomplished — and you have big plans for it right?” you asked again as you stood up from bed, grabbing your silk robe to cover yourself.

“… baby where are you going with this?” Michael asked, things started becoming more suspicious, he didn’t know what to prepare himself for. 

“While you were gone i… learned — something”  you walk towards the vanity, resting your hands on the table, Michael didn’t say anything, he just waited confusingly “…and — I didn't know how you’ll react… but — I’m not planning on hiding it from you either, just now that — whatever decision you’ll make for me i’ll do it and i’ll understand. Because I love you” you turned to him, your eyes were glassy.

Michael started to grow fear on what you were about to show him as you slowly opened the vanity drawer. You picked up the test, the plus sign still there — you walked towards Michael and gave it to him.

Michael’s eyes were still glued on to yours, eyes full of concern on what you were so afraid of. He took the test without even knowing what he just grabbed out of your hands since his eyes weren't focused on it. As he felt it in his hands he immediately looked.

His eyes grew wide seeing a positive sign on a pregnancy test. Michael looked back at you then back to the test again — he was utterly shocked. “Baby — I-is this… Is this for real” Michael reacted, stumbling his words, so many thoughts in his mind but his mouth couldn’t keep up.

You sat back down just next to his feet, you looked down, about to brace yourself on what Michael might have to say, whether he’ll be angry or devastated, or even just leave the room without saying a word. But as you glance back up to see his face, Michael pulls you in close for an unexpected kiss.

“Baby I can't believe it!” Michael burst out after he parted, you were shocked and confused by his reaction “y-your not angry..?” you questioned. “Why would I be angry? baby i’m about to be a father! I've never been happier” he answers thrillingly.

“but — what about your career—“ “baby will find a way, what’s more important is we’re gonna have a baby together!” Michael patiently explained. You laugh in disbelief, feeling glad by your boyfriend’s unexpected reaction “… you're really happy..?” you ask for confirmation.

“Of course… Why wouldn’t I be? …are you?” Michael asked sincerely, wanting to know how you felt. “…yes, yes Michael” you answered as small tears poured down to your cheek, feeling relieved. 

Michael gave you another kiss, wiping the tears off your face “how long are you…?” Michael asked his forehead pressing against yours  as his hand caressed your stomach “a few weeks… it’s gonna be a lot of work” you breathed out. “Can’t wait to do it together…” Michael smiled.

You couldn’t be more happier seeing Michael’s eyes sparkled with excitement for what the future holds. “… you know, we should celebrate — wouldn’t you agree?” Michael teased as his finger played around with your silk robe, tugging it off. You giggled at his action, giving him a peck on his lips “couldn’t agree more..!” you smiled cheerfully. 

Also people can’t use anon on here so they might not want to send in requests

ꔛ pairing — jermajesty 𝓍 ƒ!reader

೯ warning: talks about periods ofc, fluff and more fluff.

periods were never easy for you. every month, without fail, they arrived like an unwelcome storm that completely threw your body out of balance. by the third day you had usually surrendered to the pain entirely, curled up in a fetal position beneath a mountain of blankets with your heating pad clutched against your stomach. your eyebrows pinched together every time another cramp rolled through, and even shifting an inch on the couch felt like a full workout.

"maj..." you mumbled weakly from underneath the blanket, barely lifting your head. "can you please grab my heating pad? and... maybe those chocolate covered pretzels i like? actually, the gummy worms too. i deserve both."

from the kitchen, jermajesty laughed quietly to himself before answering, "already charging the heating pad, and i made a list before you even asked. i know, baby"

you could only let out a tired groan in response. "i'm gonna marry you twice." you held up two fingers, earning a laugh from him.

he smiled to himself as he slipped his shoes on.

you never really got used to how brutal your menstrual cycle could be. some months the cramps were so sharp they stole your breath before you could even react. other times it was the nausea that made every smell unbearable, or the low fever that left your skin feeling too hot and too cold all at once. your muscles ached, your head pounded, and the exhaustion settled so deeply into your bones that even reaching for your phone felt like too much effort. every month you convinced yourself maybe this one would be easier.

it never was.

still, somehow, jermajesty always managed to make it feel just a little less miserable.

he knew your cycle almost as well as you did. before you even noticed the familiar ache creeping into your lower stomach, he had already checked the tracking app the two of you shared. he'd quietly restock the medicine cabinet with your pain relievers, make sure your vitamins were sitting next to your water bottle after dinner, and stop by the grocery store for your favorite snacks without ever having to ask what you wanted.

"you're running low on the raspberry tea," he'd casually mention while putting groceries away.

you'd blink at him. "i didn't even know we were out."

"i did."

on the nights your iron dipped and you barely had enough energy to sit upright, he'd stand in the kitchen making you steak exactly how you liked it, insisting that eating something nutritious would help even if you weren't hungry. when the cramps became unbearable, he'd rub slow circles against your lower back while the heating pad rested across your stomach, never complaining about how long he'd been sitting there.

"does this help?" he'd ask softly, his thumb tracing comforting circles against your side.

"a little."

"then i'll stay until it helps more."

and he always did.

there were moments when you apologized for needing so much help, guilt creeping into your voice despite knowing he never made you feel like a burden.

"i'm sorry," you whispered one evening, eyes fixed on the blanket in your lap. "i feel like all i do is lay here and ask you for stuff."

jermajesty looked at you like the thought hadn't even crossed his mind. he brushed a strand of hair away from your face before gently cupping your cheek.

"you take care of me in a hundred different ways every day," he murmured. "this is just my turn. you never have to apologize for letting me love you."

it was impossible not to tear up a little after hearing that.

by the time your period had finally passed and ovulation rolled around, it felt like the clouds had lifted. the pain had faded, your energy had returned, and more than anything, you found yourself looking at your boyfriend with an overwhelming amount of gratitude. he never acted like taking care of you was a chore. he never sighed dramatically or complained about late night pharmacy runs or grocery store trips for your oddly specific cravings. he simply loved you through every uncomfortable moment.

so you decided it was your turn.

one lazy afternoon, while he was stretched across the couch scrolling through his phone, you quietly wandered over before climbing onto his lap. he looked up with a curious smile just as your arms wrapped around his neck.

"what's all this for?" he asked, instinctively resting his hands around your waist.

you answered by pressing a soft kiss against his forehead.

then another on his temple.

another against his cheek.

his nose.

his jaw.

every kiss made him grin wider until the familiar gap between his teeth appeared, the one you adored more than you'd probably ever admit.

"you're being suspiciously affectionate," he laughed, trying not to smile so hard. "what'd you do?"

you rolled your eyes playfully before threading your fingers through his curls, gently scratching his scalp the way you knew he loved. "nothing. i'm just appreciating my boyfriend."

he leaned back against the couch, practically melting beneath your touch.

"i don't think i thank you enough," you admitted quietly, your thumb brushing across his cheek. "you always know what i need before i even say it. every month you make something that hurts so much feel... easier. i know it probably doesn't seem like a big deal to you, but it is to me."

his smile softened instantly.

"it is a big deal," he replied. "because you're a big deal."

"you don't have to thank me for taking care of you."

"i know," you whispered, kissing him again anyway. "but i want to."

his arms tightened around your waist until you were tucked comfortably against his chest. he rested his forehead against yours, his curls brushing against your fingers as he smiled with that same warmth that always made your chest feel impossibly full.

"then i'll accept the kisses," he murmured. "but only if you promise you'll keep letting me take care of you."

you smiled back, unable to stop yourself from stealing another kiss. “deal.”

the apartment settled into a comfortable silence after that, filled only with quiet laughter, lazy kisses, and the simple comfort of being wrapped up in each other. moments like these reminded you that love wasn't always found in grand gestures. sometimes it was hidden inside heating pads warmed before you asked, grocery bags filled with your favorite snacks, vitamins left beside your dinner, and someone who chose, month after month, to make your hardest days a little softer simply because they loved you.

𝐃𝐎𝐍𝐓 𝐒𝐌𝐈𝐋𝐄

𝐏𝐀𝐈𝐑𝐈𝐍𝐆: 𝐉𝐞𝐫𝐦𝐚𝐣𝐞𝐬𝐭𝐲 𝐱 𝐟𝐞𝐦!𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐫

𝐒𝐮𝐦𝐦𝐚𝐫𝐲: thirty seven days after your breakup, jermajesty is already smiling beside someone new. as you both try to move forward, old memories, familiar faces, and unfinished feelings make one thing impossible to ignore, some people never really leave you, even after they're gone.

𝐖𝐜: 7,580

𝐖𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬: 𝐞𝐱𝐭𝐫𝐚 𝐥𝐨𝐧𝐠 𝐟𝐢𝐜, 𝐡𝐞𝐚𝐯𝐲 𝐚𝐧𝐠𝐬𝐭, 𝐞𝐱𝐞𝐬, 𝐛𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐤𝐮𝐩, 𝐜𝐫𝐲𝐢𝐧𝐠, 𝐛𝐢𝐭𝐭𝐰𝐞𝐬𝐰𝐞𝐞𝐭 𝐞𝐧𝐝𝐢𝐧𝐠

𝐚/𝐧: 𝐢𝐦 𝐬𝐨𝐫𝐫𝐲 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐡𝐨𝐰 𝐥𝐨𝐧𝐠 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐢 𝐡𝐨𝐧𝐞𝐬𝐭𝐥𝐲 𝐣𝐮𝐬𝐭 𝐤𝐞𝐩𝐭 𝐰𝐫𝐢𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡𝐨𝐮𝐭 𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐧 𝐜𝐡𝐞𝐜𝐤𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐰𝐜 😭

the first thing you noticed was that he stopped calling you “pretty.” not because he didn’t think you were. he still looked at you the same way whenever you walked into a room, his eyes lingering just a second longer than they should. he’d still absentmindedly fix the sleeve of your hoodie or brush lint off your shoulder before either of you realized what he was doing. it was everything else that changed.

the “good morning, pretty.” the random flowers he’d bring home after passing the little stand on the corner. the way he’d pull you into his lap while you cooked, despite you complaining that he was in the way.

those little things disappeared so slowly you didn’t notice until one day they were just… gone. you told yourself every relationship had phases. people got busy, life happened, love didn’t always look the same. that’s what you kept repeating to yourself as you stared at your reflection in the bathroom mirror, carefully smoothing your hair into a high bun before rubbing a little lip gloss across your lips. maybe tonight would feel normal again, maybe tonight he’d smile at you the way he used to.

you walked into the living room with cautious hope. jermajesty was sitting on the couch, elbows resting on his knees, his phone forgotten in his hands. the television played quietly in the background, but he wasn’t watching it. he looked tired, more than tired. like he’d been carrying something heavy for weeks. “you ready baby?” you asked softly. he looked up.

his eyes landed on you. for a split second… there it was. that look. the one that made you feel beautiful before you’d even gotten dressed. “yeah,” he answered. your smile faltered for half a heartbeat before you forced it back. “dinner reservation’s in twenty.” he nodded. “okay.”

the drive to the restaurant was almost unbearable. normally he’d have music blasting, one hand tapping the steering wheel while the other rested somewhere on your thigh, laughing at something completely random trying to get a smile on your face. tonight the radio stayed low. his hand never left the wheel. you watched the city lights blur past your window, your reflection staring back at you every few seconds. you wanted to ask him what was wrong. instead you asked, “how was work?” “busy.” “anything interesting happen?” “not really.” “oh.” silence settled between you again, you hated silence. especially this one. it felt like there were a thousand words trapped inside both of you, refusing to come out.

dinner should’ve been perfect. the restaurant overlooked the skyline, warm lights hanging above the outdoor patio while soft jazz floated through hidden speakers. it used to be your favorite place. the waiter complimented your emerald dress you wore, you thanked him with a smile. jermajesty looked up from the menu.

“you do look beautiful.” your heart squeezed. finally. “thank you.” for just a second, things felt normal. until they didn’t. the conversation never found its rhythm. every topic died after a sentence or two. you caught him staring out over the city more than once. he caught you staring at him. neither of you said anything.

later that night, you stood at the kitchen sink washing dishes while warm water ran over your hands. you heard the apartment door close. “you forgot your hoodie,” you called. no answer. you frowned. turning off the faucet, you dried your hands and walked into the living room. jermajesty hadn’t left. he was standing by the front door. still wearing his jacket. keys dangling from his fingers. he looked… terrified. your stomach dropped. “…maj?” he swallowed.

“can we talk?” four words. four painfully ordinary words. and somehow, they sounded like the end of the world. you tried to smile anyway. “you’re scaring me.”

he looked down at the hardwood floor. you’d never seen him avoid your eyes before. “i know.” the apartment suddenly felt too quiet, the refrigerator hummed.

cars passed outside. somewhere upstairs, a dog barked. everything in the world kept moving while yours stood perfectly still.

you stepped closer. “did something happen?” he closed his eyes for a second. then opened them. “i’ve been trying to figure out how to say this for weeks.” your chest tightened. weeks? while you were planning date nights. while you were sending him apartment listings with bigger kitchens. while you were secretly saving engagement rings on pinterest, pretending you weren’t. he’d already been deciding how to leave. “…say what?” his voice cracked. “i don’t think,” he stopped. tried again. “i don’t think we’re making each other happy anymore.” the sentence echoed through the apartment. you blinked once. twice. waiting for the punchline. waiting for him to laugh and tell you he was joking.

he didn’t. your lips parted. “what?” “we’ve been trying, baby.” baby. he hadn’t called you that in weeks. “don’t do that.” his eyebrows pulled together. “don’t call me ‘baby’ if you’re about to break my heart.” his face crumpled. you’d never seen jermajesty look so guilty. “i’m sorry.” “no.” your voice came out sharper than you intended. “no, explain it to me.” he rubbed both hands over his face. “every conversation turns into an argument.” “because we don’t communicate.” “i know.” “then fix it.” “i’ve tried.” “then try harder.” silence. your breathing became uneven. “is there somebody else?” his head snapped up immediately. “what? no.” “don’t lie to me.”

“i’m not.” “then why?” his eyes filled before yours did. “because i love you…” your heart broke at the word love” “and somehow we’re still hurting each other.” you stared at him. you wanted to disagree. to tell him he was wrong. that love was enough. that if two people loved each other, they could survive anything. but deep down, you knew exactly what he meant. the missed dinners. the little arguments that somehow lasted hours.

the nights spent sleeping inches apart without touching. you just never imagined those moments were adding up for him too. “so…” your voice barely existed anymore. “that’s it?” he couldn’t answer. because if he said yes, it would become real. you looked around the apartment. your apartment. the framed pictures from vacations. the blanket you both fought over every movie night. his shoes by the door. this place looked like a home. how could homes end in a single conversation?

he quietly walked toward the bedroom. when he came back, there was a duffel bag over his shoulder. your knees almost gave out. “you packed?” he nodded once. “when?” “a little at a time.” that hurt more than anything else. he hadn’t decided tonight. he’d been leaving you… piece by piece. you wanted to scream. you wanted to throw something. instead, you just stood there. watching the man you loved pick up his overnight bag like he wasn’t carrying your future inside it. he stopped in front of you. close enough that you could smell the cologne you’d bought him for his birthday. close enough that if either of you leaned forward an inch, you’d be in each other’s arms.

he reached toward your face. hesitated. then let his hand fall back to his side. “i really am sorry.” a tear slipped down your cheek. you didn’t wipe it away. “me too.” he nodded once. opened the front door. and walked out. the click of the lock was almost gentle. you stood there for what felt like hours, staring at the door, waiting for footsteps to come back down the hallway. waiting for another knock. waiting for him to realize he’d made a mistake. nothing came. the apartment was finally as quiet as it had felt for weeks.

except now, you were the only one left to hear it.

thirty seven days. that's how long it'd been since jermajesty walked out of the apartment. thirty seven days since you heard his laugh echo through the kitchen. thirty seven days since you woke up beside him. thirty seven days since you became someone who checked the other side of the bed before remembering there was no one there anymore. you'd stopped crying every day. that had to count for something. now it was every few days. progress. or whatever people called surviving.

"girl, if you don't answer this phone..." genevieve’s voice came through your voicemail for what had to be the fourth time that week. "i know you've been dodging everybody, but i'm not letting you disappear. i'm coming over tomorrow, and if you don't answer the door, i'm using the spare key." the message ended. you smiled despite yourself.

she had always been like a big sister to you. she'd checked on you almost every day since the breakup. so had jaafar. the apartment didn't look like yours anymore. or maybe.. it looked too much like both of yours. his favorite mug still sat in the cabinet. his hoodie was still draped over the back of the dining chair. you'd told yourself you were keeping it there until you figured out what to do with it. instead, you walked past it every morning. and every morning, your fingers brushed against the sleeve. just for a second.

just enough to pretend he was still here. "baby?" you froze. your own voice echoed back at you from the apartment walls. you'd done it again. sometimes, without thinking, you'd call out to him after getting home from work. the silence that answered every time never got easier. you let out a shaky laugh. "get your shit it together."

your saturday started like every other one. laundry, grocery shopping, cleaning, trying not to think too much. you tied your hair up, before grabbing your tote bag and heading to the grocery store. halfway through the cereal aisle... your hand automatically reached for cinnamon toast crunch. you frowned. jermajesty didn't even live here anymore. he wasn't coming over tomorrow morning asking why you bought "the healthy cereal."

he wasn't going to stand behind you in the kitchen stealing handfuls straight from the box while you complained. you slowly put it back on the shelf. kept walking. until you turned around. picked it back up. and placed it in your cart anyway. your eyes burned. "damn."

by the time you got home, your phone battery was hanging on by a thread. you dropped your grocery bags onto the counter before plugging your phone into the charger. the screen lit up, a flood of notifications appeared. mostly work. a few texts. none from your sister. and then, jaafar jackson tagged jermajesty in a post. your stomach dropped. you shouldn't. you knew you shouldn't. you'd promised yourself. you'd muted his account. deleted your shortcuts.

avoided searching his name. because healing meant not looking. right? your thumb hovered over the notification. just one look. that's all. one look couldn't hurt. you tapped it. it was a carousel of pictures. the first was jaafar, the second was a random sky picture, the third... your breath caught. jermajesty. he stood outside a restaurant you'd been begging him to try for months. his arm rested casually around a girl you'd never seen before. she was beautiful.rich brown skin. soft curls framing her face. she leaned into him naturally, like she'd done it a hundred times before. they both smiled at the camera. your chest tightened. swipe. another picture.

this time she was laughing. his head was turned toward her. looking at her. the smile on his face... you knew that smile. you'd spent years learning every version of it. the shy one. the sarcastic one. the teasing one. the one he only wore when he looked at someone he cared about. your thumb started shaking. swipe. the last picture. they weren't kissing. they weren't holding hands. but she was fixing the collar of his jacket. and he was looking down at her with that same soft expression he'd worn the first time he'd told you he loved you. your vision blurred. you quickly locked your phone. like closing the screen could erase what you'd just seen. it couldn't. because now it lived in your head.

you slid down the kitchen cabinets until you were sitting on the floor. the grocery bags sat forgotten on the counter. ice cream slowly melted, milk grew warm. you couldn't move.

your phone buzzed. once. twice. three times. you ignored it, then it buzzed again.

genevieve 🤍

hey, are you okay?

another message.

i know you probably saw the pictures.

another.

please don't be alone right now.

your lip trembled.

so... everybody knew. everybody had already seen them. you set your phone face down. pulled your knees to your chest. and cried harder than you had the night he left. because the breakup, that had been full of possibilities. maybe he'd call or maybe he'd change his mind. maybe six months from now, you'd find your way back to each other. but those pictures, those pictures felt final. for the first time in thirty seven days... it wasn't the breakup that hurt the most. it was realizing the world had kept spinning

and somehow, jermajesty had learned how to smile again. without you.

your apartment smelled like vanilla candles. genevieve always lit one whenever she came over. she claimed it made the place feel "less sad." you never told her the sadness wasn't in the apartment. it was in you. "and i'm just saying," she continued, carrying two mugs of hot chocolate into the living room, "if one more person on tiktok tells me to 'romanticize my life,' i'm deleting the app." you let out the smallest laugh. "see?" she pointed at you dramatically. "there she is." "don't get used to it." "too late." she handed you one of the mugs before plopping onto the couch beside you. for a while, neither of you said anything.

the television played quietly in the background. some random reality show neither of you were paying attention to. genevieve glanced over. "you haven't been sleeping." it wasn't a question. you looked down into your mug. "you can tell?" "i'm kidding." you rolled your eyes. "that wasn't funny." "a little." you shook your head, smiling despite yourself. the smile disappeared almost as quickly as it came. genevieve noticed. she always did, "you saw the pictures." your fingers tightened around the mug. "yeah." she sighed. "i figured."

another silence settled between you. different from the ones you'd shared with jermajesty. this one wasn't uncomfortable. it was just... heavy. "i almost called you," genevieve admitted quietly. "why didn't you?" "because i didn't know what to say." you nodded. "me neither." "can i ask you something?" you shrugged. "sure." "are you mad at us?" your eyebrows pulled together. "what?" "my family." she looked nervous now. "because... you haven't really come around since..." she couldn't finish the sentence. since the breakup. you reached over, resting your hand on hers. "gen."

she looked at you. "none of this is your fault." "i know.” "or your mom,"!she nodded. "or anybody else's." "i know." "i just..." you looked around the apartment before your eyes landed on the framed picture sitting on the bookshelf. it was from christmas. you and jermajesty stood in the middle, surrounded by his family. genevieve had insisted everyone wear matching pajamas. randy jr. had complained the entire night. jaafar had almost burned the cookies. alejandra cried because she said everyone looked beautiful.

you remembered laughing so hard your stomach hurt. back then... it never crossed your mind that one day you'd be looking at that picture like it belonged to somebody else. "it's hard," you whispered. genevieve followed your gaze. "you're family." the words came out so naturally. like there wasn't another option, "you've always been family."

your throat tightened. "was." she immediately shook her head. "are." you looked away before she could see your eyes fill with tears. that evening, after genevieve left, you found yourself standing in front of the hallway closet. there, tucked behind a stack of blankets... was a cardboard box. jermajesty's things. you'd packed them almost two weeks ago. his hoodie, a few books, his favorite controller. a watch he'd accidentally left in the bathroom. you crouched in front of the box, lifting the hoodie to your face. it barely smelled like him anymore. just laundry detergent. time had washed him away. you folded it carefully and placed it back inside. closed the lid. but you couldn't bring yourself to tape the box shut.

doing that... felt too permanent. your phone rang just after seven. alejandra. your stomach flipped. for a second, you considered letting it go to voicemail. instead, you answered. "hello?" "mi amor." her voice was as warm as ever. "hi." "how are you feeling?" you smiled sadly, "i've been better."

"genevieve told me she came to see you." "she did.” “good." there was a brief pause. then... "listen, sweetheart... i'm calling because your cousin's birthday dinner is next weekend." you blinked. "oh." "everyone's coming." you already knew what she was about to ask. "i know things have been... difficult." an understatement. "but i wanted you to hear this from me." your grip tightened on the phone. "you don't stop being family because a relationship ended." your eyes immediately filled. "alejandra..." "i mean that." her voice softened. "those doors have always been open for you, and they'll stay open for you." a tear slid down your cheek.

"thank you." "so..." she waited patiently. "will you come?" you closed your eyes. every instinct told you no it would hurt. it would be so awkward. what if he was there? what if he wasn't? somehow... both possibilities terrified you. "i don't know." "that's okay." alejandra didn't push. "think about it." you nodded even though she couldn't see you. "okay." after you hung up, you stared at the dark screen of your phone. your heart and your head were already arguing. don't go. it's too soon.

you'll only make things harder. but another voice whispered something quieter. what if you lose them too? because losing jermajesty had already shattered you. you weren't sure you could survive losing the family that had loved you like their own for years. you sat your phone on the coffee table and looked around the apartment. for the first time since the breakup... home didn't feel like the place you'd built with him. it felt like the place you'd been hiding from the rest of your life.

and maybe sooner or later, you were going to have to open the front door.

you changed your outfit three times. the black dress felt too formal. the jeans felt like you weren’t trying. the green sundress reminded you too much of the one jermajesty said made you look “like summertime.” that one was immediately thrown back into the closet. in the end, you settled on a simple chocolate brown maxi dress that hugged your figure just enough without feeling like you were trying to impress anybody. because you weren’t.

at least… that’s what you kept telling yourself. you stood in front of the mirror, adjusting the gold hoops in your ears before fluffing out the ends of your hair. “you got this,” you whispered. your reflection didn’t look convinced. the drive to alejandra’s house felt longer than usual. every red light gave you another opportunity to turn around. you almost did.

twice. instead, you pulled into the driveway you’d visited hundreds of times before. nothing had changed. for a second, it almost felt like you were coming home. you hated how comforting that feeling still was. before you could lose your nerve, the front door flew open. “she’s here!” genevieve practically ran down the porch steps before wrapping you in a hug so tight you laughed. “girl, let me breathe.”

“no.” she squeezed harder. “i missed you.” your smile softened. “i missed you too.” when she finally let go, she grabbed your hand and pulled you inside. “everybody’s been waiting.” the familiar scent of seasoned food and candles wrapped around you instantly. music played softly from the kitchen. laughter echoed through the house. for the first time in over a month, your heart didn’t feel quite as heavy. “look who decided to show up,” randy jr. called from the living room. you rolled your eyes. “missed me?” “a little.”

“a little?” “don’t push it.” you laughed. “a hater.” “a proud one.” jaafar stood from the couch and pulled you into a hug. “it’s good to see you.” “it’s good to see you too.” he held your shoulders for a second before looking you over. “you look good.” “thank you.” “you eating?” “trying.” he nodded. he understood what you weren’t saying. you appreciated that he didn’t ask any more questions.

“baby!”you turned just in time for alejandra to pull you into one of her signature hugs. the kind that made you feel like all the broken pieces of you could fit back together again. “look at you.” she cupped your face. “you’re beautiful.” you smiled through the lump in your throat. “thank you.” she kissed your forehead. “i’m so happy you came.” “me too.” and surprisingly, you meant it. the evening slipped by easier than you’d expected. you helped alejandra finish the macaroni. genevieve convinced you to help decorate the cake. randy jr. challenged you to a game you beat him at. twice. “you cheated.” “i literally didn’t.” “there’s no way i lost fair and square.” “maybe you’re just bad.” gasps filled the room. “she got jokes!” you laughed harder than you had in weeks. real laughter, for the first time since the breakup. you forgot to miss him.

until, the front door opened. you barely noticed at first. someone had just asked you if you wanted another slice of cake. voices drifted in from the foyer. male laughter, a familiar laughter. your body reacted before your mind did. your smile slowly faded. genevieve noticed. her eyes flickered toward the hallway. then back to you. something unreadable crossed her face. you frowned. before you could ask what was wrong, you heard his voice.

“my bad, traffic was crazy.” your heartbeat stopped. no. you weren’t ready. he stepped into the living room. jermajesty. he looked almost exactly the same. same chain resting against his chest. same curls tucked beneath a fitted cap. same cologne. even from across the room, you could swear you smelled it. his eyes found yours immediately. everything else disappeared.

the conversations, the music, the decorations. it was just the two of you. standing there. looking at each other for the first time in thirty eight days. his expression shifted, surprise. then something softer. something that looked dangerously close to regret. your lips parted, but no words came out. he looked like he wanted to say your name. instead,

someone gently touched his arm. your eyes dropped. she stepped into view. the girl from the pictures. except somehow, she was even prettier in person. her complexion glowed beneath the warm lights. a soft smile rested on her lips as she looked around the room, clearly a little nervous. she moved closer to jermajesty without thinking. like it was comfortable for her, like she belonged beside him. your chest caved in. you couldn’t breathe. he glanced at her. then back at you. the guilt on his face was almost unbearable. you realized something then. those pictures hadn’t lied. this wasn’t rumors. this wasn’t social media making something look bigger than it was. she was here.

in this house. meeting the people you’d spent years calling family. the room suddenly felt too small. too loud, too hot. you forced your feet to move before anyone could stop you. “excuse me.” your voice barely came out above a whisper. you weren’t sure who you were talking to. maybe everyone. maybe no one. you walked past them. close enough that his shoulder almost brushed yours. close enough to hear him inhale sharply. close enough that, for one impossible second, you wanted him to reach for your hand. he didn’t. that hurt even more. by the time the bathroom door clicked shut behind you, your hands were shaking so badly you could barely lock it.

you stared at yourself in the mirror. mascara untouched. lip gloss still perfect. from the outside… you looked perfectly fine, inside you felt like you were standing in the exact spot where your heart had broken thirty eight days ago. only this time… you had an audience.

the bathroom felt smaller with every shaky breath you took. you gripped the edge of the sink until your knuckles turned pale. "come on," you whispered to your reflection. "not here." your voice cracked anyway. you splashed cool water across your face, careful not to ruin your makeup. you refused to walk out looking like you'd been crying over a man who wasn't yours anymore. even if you had. there was a soft knock at the door. "baby?" alejandra. you quickly wiped beneath your eyes. "one second." you unlocked the door just enough to peek through. alejandra's face immediately softened. "oh, sweetheart..." you looked away. "i'm okay." she didn't believe you. neither of you did.

without a word, she wrapped her arms around you. you melted into the hug before you could stop yourself. "i didn't know," she whispered. your eyebrows pulled together. "what?" her voice was full of guilt. "i didn't know he was bringing someone." you closed your eyes. you believed her. if she'd known... she would've warned you. "it's okay." it wasn't. but you couldn't blame her. she sighed against your hair. "you don't have to stay." you thought about it. you could leave. get in your car, go home. curl up beneath the blanket that still smelled faintly like him. pretend tonight never happened. instead, you shook your head.

"it's her first time meeting everybody." alejandra looked confused. you swallowed the lump in your throat. "i don't want her first impression of this family to be me running out because i couldn't handle seeing them together." your words surprised even you. alejandra reached up and cupped your cheek. "you've always had such a beautiful heart." you gave her the saddest smile you'd ever worn. "i wish it hurt less." when you walked back into the dining room, the conversations slowed for just a moment.

not because anyone pitied you. because everyone was worried. you offered you a reassuring smile. it was convincing enough. people slowly returned to their conversations. you slid into an empty chair beside genevieve. across the table, jermajesty sat with her. her name, you'd learned only a few minutes ago, was naomi. she laughed quietly at something randy jr. said. "i promise i'm not usually this nervous." "that's a lie," genevieve teased from beside you. "he gets nervous introducing anybody to us." the table laughed. even you smiled. naomi covered her face. "please don't expose me.

jermajesty chuckled. "too late." your chest tightened. his laugh hadn't changed. it still sounded like home. dinner carried on. plates were passed around. stories were shared. jaafar somehow found a way to make everyone laugh until they nearly cried. from the outside... it looked like any other family dinner. but every now and then, you caught jermajesty looking at you. not long. for just a second. like he was checking to make sure you were still there.

every time your eyes met, he looked away first. "jer." naomi nudged him gently, "hmm?" "you okay?" he blinked. "yeah." "you've been quiet.” "just tired." she accepted the answer. you didn't. because you knew him. he rubbed the back of his neck whenever he lied. he'd done it three times since you'd sat back down.

later, while everyone helped clean up, you slipped outside onto the back patio. the summer air was warm against your skin. you welcomed it. anything to escape the weight inside the house. you leaned against the porch railing, looking out over the backyard. so many memories lived here. cookouts, birthday parties, water balloon fights. late night conversations that lasted until sunrise. you wondered if places remembered people. if the porch missed you the way you missed him. the sliding door opened behind you. you didn't turn around. you already knew. "can we talk?" his voice was quiet. like speaking too loudly might shatter whatever fragile peace still existed between you. you let out a small laugh.

"haven't we done enough of that?" he stopped a few feet away. giving you space. space you suddenly hated. “i'm sorry." you stared out at the yard. "for what?" "for tonight." "which part?" the question hung in the air. he didn't answer. because there were too many parts. you finally looked at him. he looked exhausted. there were dark circles beneath his eyes. his curls were messier than usual, like he'd run his hands through them all evening. for the first time, he didn't look like a man who had happily moved on. he looked like someone carrying the consequences of his own choices. "i didn't know my mom invited you." you nodded once.

"i figured." "if i had known—" "what?" your voice wasn't angry. just tired. "you wouldn't have brought her?" he opened his mouth. closed it. because he didn't know. and maybe that was answer enough. you looked down at your hands. "she's beautiful." he frowned. you continued before he could interrupt. "she seems sweet. "she is."

your heart cracked quietly. "that's good." another silence. this one stretched longer than either of you wanted. finally, he spoke. "how've you been?" you almost laughed. thirty eight days. one breakup. a hundred unanswered questions. and all he could ask was, how've you been? you looked him in the eyes. "honestly?" he nodded. "i've been learning how to stop reaching for you." his entire face fell. you kept going. "every morning." you smiled sadly. "it's harder than i thought it'd be." he looked away. you noticed his jaw tighten.

his eyes glistened beneath the porch light. for a second, he looked like he wanted to say something. something important. instead, the sliding door opened again. "there you are." naomi stepped onto the patio with an apologetic smile. "i've been looking everywhere." the moment disappeared. jermajesty cleared his throat,

"hey." she looked between the two of you, sensing she'd interrupted something she couldn't name. "alejandra wanted to know if you guys wanted dessert." you stepped back immediately. "you two should go." jermajesty didn't move. you forced a smile. "go." naomi reached for his hand without thinking. he let her. your eyes dropped to their intertwined fingers. just for a second. then you looked away. he noticed. of course he did. you could feel him noticing. but neither of you said anything. because there was nothing left to say. you watched them walk back toward the house together. right before he stepped inside, jermajesty glanced over his shoulder. you were still standing exactly where he'd left you. and for the first time since the breakup, he realized something that made his chest ache moving on hadn't erased you. it had only taught him how impossible you were to leave behind.

jermajesty had always hated silence. he used to fill it with music. bad jokes. random conversations that started with "you know what i was thinking?" now... he just drove. the radio stayed off. naomi at in the passenger seat, scrolling through playlists on her phone. "you've been quiet all night."

he glanced over. "sorry." "don't apologize." she smiled gently. "i was just making sure you weren't mad at me." his eyebrows pulled together. "why would i be mad at you?" she shrugged. "i don't know." he reached over and squeezed her hand "I'm not." and he meant it. none of this was naomi's fault. she hadn't stolen him. she hadn't broken anybody apart. she'd simply walked into his life when he was lonely enough to convince himself loneliness and healing were the same thing.

after dropping her off, he sat in his car for another twenty minutes. he couldn't make himself drive home. his phone buzzed. genevieve. he answered. "what?" "don't 'what' me." he sighed. "i'm tired." "so is she." his grip tightened around the steering wheel. "is she okay?" genevieve laughed once. not because anything was funny. because she couldn't believe he'd asked. "you don't get to ask me that." he closed his eyes. "i know."

"you watched her cry in our mother's bathroom tonight." every word landed like a punch. "i know." "you watched her smile through dinner so nobody would feel uncomfortable." "i know." "and you still asked me if she's okay." he didn't answer. because there wasn't one. genevieve's voice softened. "jer..." "yeah?" "are you?" his throat tightened. he looked through the windshield at nothing. "i don't know anymore." his apartment was cold. not because the air conditioning was too high. because no one lived there except him. he tossed his keys onto the counter before opening the refrigerator. orange juice, eggs, leftover takeout. he frowned. "damn." she would've gone grocery shopping by now. the thought came without permission. he shut the refrigerator a little harder than he meant to.

he tried making coffee the next morning. he reached into the cabinet. paused. there were two mugs. one black. one deep brown with tiny gold speckles. hers. she'd accidentally left it months ago. he'd washed it. put it away. never returned it. his hand hovered over it before pulling back. he grabbed the black mug instead. the coffee tasted wrong.

"bro." jaafar leaned against the gym wall, towel draped around his neck. "you've missed every shot for the last five minutes." jermajesty blinked. "my bad." "you wanna tell me what's going on?" "nothing." "liar." he bounced the basketball once before passing it over. jermajesty caught it automatically.

jaafar watched him carefully. "you still love her." the ball slipped through jermajesty's hands. it rolled across the court. he didn't chase it. "i never stopped." the words echoed louder than he expected. jaafar didn't look surprised. he just looked sad. "then why'd you leave?"jermajesty laughed bitterly. "because loving somebody isn't always enough." he rubbed both hands over his face.

"every conversation became an argument." "i know." "she deserved better than the version of me i kept becoming." "did leaving fix that?" he stared at the floor. "no." "then what did it fix?" nothing. it fixed nothing. he still looked for her in crowded rooms, still reached for his phone whenever something funny happened. still almost sent her videos before remembering. still expected to hear her singing while she cooked. still couldn't drive past the little diner where she'd stolen fries off his plate every friday night. he'd left. but somehow, she'd come with him.

that night, naomi invited him over for dinner. she greeted him with a hug and a kiss on the cheek. "i tried making your favorite pasta." his heart sank. it wasn't her fault. she couldn't have known, you had always made that recipe. he smiled anyway. "thank you."

they sat together. talked. laughed. she told him about work. he listened. he really did. then she asked a simple question. "do you want parmesan?" he almost answered without thinking. "only if you already put it on mine." silence. naomi frowned. "what?" his stomach dropped. that wasn't something he'd ever said to her. that was something he'd said to you. every single time you cooked. because you'd always forget to sprinkle cheese on his plate first. he set his fork down. "I'm sorry." she looked at him for a long time. too long. finally she whispered,

"you're still in love with her." it wasn't a question. he couldn't lie. not to her. not anymore. tears filled her eyes before his did. she nodded slowly. almost like she'd been preparing herself for the answer. "i kept wondering why it always felt like there was someone else sitting at this table." his heart shattered. because she deserved so much better than being compared to a memory.

"naomi..." she held up her hand. "don't." a tear slipped down her cheek. "you've been so kind to me.” another tear. "but i've been competing with someone who isn't even here." he covered his face. "I'm so sorry." she smiled through her tears. "i know." she reached across the table and squeezed his hand one last time. "i hope one day you find your way back to each other." he looked at her. for the first time in weeks... he realized what made him cry. it wasn't hope. it was knowing she'd said one day. and deep down,

he believed that day had already passed. some loves don't end because they disappear. they end because life keeps moving while two people stand still. and no matter how much they still loved each other... they had already become memories.

one year later.

people liked to say time healed everything. you’d learned that wasn’t true. time didn’t heal. it softened. the memories didn’t disappear. they just stopped knocking the air out of your lungs every time they showed up. instead of crying when you heard his favorite song… you smiled.

instead of avoiding the restaurant where you’d had your first date, you walked inside. ordered dessert. left a good tip. kept living. because eventually, you had to.

your apartment looked different now. warmer. plants sat on the windowsill. your walls held new pictures. new memories. new versions of yourself. you’d finally donated the hoodie. returned the box of his things months ago. you even bought a new coffee mug after accidentally reaching for his one too many times. life had moved. so had you. just, not in the way you’d imagined. “excuse me.” you looked up from the shelf of books. a familiar hand reached for the same novel you were holding. your heart stopped. slowly… your eyes traveled upward same curls. same warm brown eyes. same chain resting against his chest. older. little more tired around the eyes. but still, him. jermajesty froze. “hey.”

it had been a year, and somehow… he still said your name the same way. like it was something precious. “hey.” the word barely left your lips. for a second, neither of you moved. the bookstore buzzed quietly around you. pages turned. people talked. someone laughed near the front counter. the world kept going, just like it had the day you’d watched him walk out of your apartment. just like it had the day you’d watched him walk in holding someone else’s hand. and now… it kept going while the two of you stood face to face for the first time in almost a year.

“you look…” he smiled. “good.” you laughed quietly. “you too.” he rubbed the back of his neck. you almost smiled. some habits never changed. “how’ve you been?” this time, the question felt different. you thought about answering automatically. good. fine. can’t complain.

instead, you told the truth. “i’m happy.” his eyes softened. “that’s good.” “yeah.” you nodded. “it took a while.” “i know.” you believed him. because healing wasn’t something you could fake. and looking at him now, he looked like someone who had done the work. you wandered through the bookstore together. not because either of you planned to. because neither of you seemed ready to say goodbye. you talked about work. about genevieve. about jaafar finally learning how to cook without burning something. you laughed. real laughter. the kind that wasn’t weighed down by grief anymore. it almost felt, easy. almost. until he stopped walking.

“naomi and i broke up.” you looked at him. he wasn’t searching your face for a reaction. he was simply telling you the truth. “I’m sorry.” he nodded. “she deserved somebody who wasn’t trying to outrun his past.” you looked down. “she seemed like a really sweet girl.” “she is.” there wasn’t bitterness in his voice. only respect. “I hope she’s happy.” “I do too.”

you reached the front of the store. the afternoon sun spilled through the windows. your cars sat in opposite directions of the parking lot. funny. even now, life was asking you to choose separate paths. he looked at you. “can i tell you something?” you nodded. “I still think about you.” there it was. the sentence you’d imagined hearing a thousand different ways. a year ago… it would’ve been enough to send you running back into his arms. today, it simply made your eyes water. “I know.” he smiled sadly.

“how?” you looked out at the parking lot. “because i still think about you too.” silence settled between you.mnot uncomfortable, not painful, just honest. “i used to hope you’d think about me every time you held someone else.” you admitted it with a small laugh through your tears.

“I know.” “i wanted it to hurt.” “it did.” his voice cracked. “every day.” you finally looked at him. there was no pride in hearing those words. no satisfaction. only heartbreak. because if he had suffered, then neither of you had won. “I don’t want that anymore.” you whispered. “I don’t either.” another silence. gentler this time. “I don’t think we were a mistake.”

he said. your eyes filled again. “no.” you smiled. “i think we were just… early.” his lips trembled into the smallest smile. “maybe.” you stepped closer. without thinking, you wrapped your arms around him. he hugged you back immediately. the embrace felt familiar. safe. like coming home to a house that no longer belonged to you. when you pulled away, neither of you rushed to let go. “thank you.” he frowned.

“for what?” “for loving me the best way you knew how.” his eyes closed. “i’m sorry it wasn’t enough.” “It was.” you shook your head gently. “It just wasn’t enough forever.” he swallowed hard. “i’ll always be rooting for you.” you smiled. “i know.” he laughed softly. “how do you keep doing that?” “because i know you.” he looked at you for a long moment. then nodded once. “yeah.” you both glanced toward the parking lot. time to leave. this time, neither of you waited for the other to walk away first. you’d already learned how painful that was. “take care of yourself, jer.” “you too.” you turned. took a few steps. then stopped. not because you wanted to go back. because there was one last thing you needed him to know. without looking over your shoulder, you spoke.

“i hope she makes you smile one day.” he stood quietly behind you. then answered with a voice so soft the wind almost carried it away. “she already did.”

⊹₊⟡⋆ jerdada taking care of you while drunk

the music at the club had been too loud, the drinks had tasted too much like juice, and by midnight, your homegirls knew they’d lost you to the liquor. laughing and shaking their heads, they scrolled through your phone and called the one person they knew would show up without hesitation: jermajesty.

when he pulled up to the venue, he didn’t even look mad. he just took your purse, thanked your friends, and guided you carefully into the passenger seat, buckling you in while you mumbled some incoherent story about how much you loved him.

"i know, baby," he chuckled, his voice a low, soothing hum in the quiet of the car. "i love you too. let's get you home."

once you walked through the front door, your coordination completely gave out. you slumped against the hallway wall, giggling as you tried to unlace your heels. jermajesty just knelt down, gently pushing your hands away to do it for you.

"alright, angel," he teased softly, looking up at you with those warm eyes. "let’s get you washed up."

Jaafar. J

pairings: jaafar jackson x fem!reader

synopsis: when your boyfriend returns from his trip, you try to play the perfect girlfriend knowing the secrets you were hiding from him. you guys attended a gala celebrating a new foundation, when jaafar drags you in a locked dark room. to you, the real danger isn't getting caught with the secret you hold. it's realizing you’ve fallen completely in love with this man.

warnings: 18+, infidelity plot (both reader and jaafar are in relationships), rough wall sex, public sex, risk of getting caught, p n v, unprotected (wrap it up pls), creampie dom!jaafar, sub!reader, bruises, biting, marks on hip & neck, size difference, minimal after care, use of pet names (baby, princess, pretty), no use of y/n

wc: 4.4k

A/N: here’s a highly requested pt 2 of PHP🥰 this one is messyyyy! anyways i hope you guys enjoy this. comment ‘tags’ to be added to my taglist!

request are open!

tags: @mimionspot, @ghettofabu05, @lilitheebaddest

part 1: here!

Jaafar. J

pairings: Jaafar jackson x nepo!femreader

synopsis: growing up used to keeping up a flawless public image. but, behind closed doors, whenever opportunity arrives, you always find yourself under your coworker. when your boyfriend goes on a business trip, your affair with Jaafar reveals itself again.

warnings: 18+, infidelity plot (both reader and jaafar are in relationships), rough sex, fingering, oral (m & f), multiple orgasms, ball play (if u squint), p n v, mentions of squirting, unprotected (wrap it up pls), spanking, dom!jaafar, sub!reader, mentions of bruises/biting/marks, size difference, little after care (sorry🙁), heavy use of pet names (baby, love, good girl, princess, pretty), no use of y/n, freaky freak freaks

wc: 3.7k

A/N: I wrote this one immediately after the jermajesty fic, im just hungry asf😵‍💫

requests are open!

summary: i did a jaafar one so it’s only right i do one for jerdada

tags/warnings: all links from X so you need an account to view. also i’m based in the USA so some countries may be unable to view the links im so sorry for that! lately, these are p0rn videos so if that's not your thing, and/or you're a minor, please don't interact!

author's note: i long to have lazy sneaky sideways sex with jermagesty in the middle of night, it actually pains me to think about *lays down with back of hand on forhead like victorian princess*

taglist: @jermagestyswife, @myah4livz , @melaninjoys , @iith1um , @cinnamoncunt , @szalipcombo , @delictezz , @vict-oryy , @vxn-lakhiaa , @love4niy , @asiatarg , @daniiibananiii , @honeyatsu , @choc0ch1ps , @chloethefantastic , @theyluvkylaaa , @lov3lylxvender , @luvsbia , @swavydadon , @saintwrld (if you want to be added to the tag list leave a comment lm this post)

WARNING THIS FANFICTION INCLUDES THE FOLLOWING:

Unprotected sex, asfab reader, p!in!v, accidental/unplanned breeding, mating press, kissing, dirty talk, daddy kink, slight overstimulation, dumbification if you squint, implied squirting, and more. smut with absolutely zero plot.

Plus size friendly, no mentions of size/shape. Black women friendly, no mentions of hair type, color or head coverings/wraps mentioned. Fen pet names used, “good girl.” “my girl.” “pretty girl.” Etc. sorry for any mistakes, I wrote this while tipsy and ovulating after watching too many edits of the finest Jackson aka Jermajesty😝but, I hope you enjoy! Reblogs, likes and comments are always appreciated and constructive criticism is always welcomed. #kissamanwithagaptoday🩷

Jermajesty x Shy! reader

Summary: You and Jermajesty on a late night phone call.

The glow from your phone lit up your room in the dark. You'd been staring at the screen for almost twenty minutes, debating whether you should text him first. Before you could decide, your phone buzzed.

Jer❤️

A smile tugged at your lips, you answered. "Hey." "Hey mama. "His voice instantly made you relax. "Hi." "You been hiding from me all day, sweetheart?"

You rolled onto your side, pulling your blanket up to your chin. "I wasn't hiding." "Mm." The hum on the other end made your cheeks warm. "You usually send me at least three random texts." "Do I?" "You do."

"Maybe I was busy." "Busy for twelve hours?" You laughing quietly. "Okay, maybe not twelve." "That's what I thought." The line fell comfortable and quiet, Jermajesty spoke first. "How was your day baby?" You hesitated. "It was okay." "Just okay?" "Yeah."

"What happened?" "Nothing really." "I don't believe that." "Why?"

"Everybody says 'nothing' when there's actually something." You smiled into your pillow. "It really wasn't interesting." "Good, that means I get to hear about all the boring parts." You laughed. "Why would you want to hear boring parts?"

" They're yours, pretty girl." Your heart nearly stopped. Jermajesty continued casually, like he hadn't just completely flustered you. "Now start talking about your day" "Nothing happened." "You woke up, didn't you?"

"Obviously." "Great. Start there." You groaned. "You're serious?" "Very." A grin was obvious in his voice. "What time did you wake up?" "Around eight."

"See? We're already making progress." You shook your head. "You're ridiculous." "yet you're still talking." You smiled despite yourself. "Fine."

"That's my shy thing." Your face immediately heated up. "Anyway..."

"Anyway," he echoed. "I woke up around eight and almost missed my alarm." "Mm-hm." "Then I spent ten minutes looking for my charger."

"Yeah" "It was under my pillow." Jermajesty burst out laughing. "See? This is exactly why I asked." "That's not funny." "It's hilarious baby."

"I thought I lost it." "You lost it in your own bed." "Okay, moving on." His laughter softened. "Go ahead, angel." "Then I went to class." "How was that?" "Boring." "Tell me anyway." You smiled. "There was this guy who accidentally knocked over his water bottle." "Damn."

"It rolled all the way down the aisle." "No." "Yes." "That's rough." "Everybody stared at him." Jermajesty groaned sympathetically. "I'd never recover." You laughed. "Neither would I." "See? You keep saying your day wasn't interesting."

"It wasn't." "Baby, I've been listening to you talk about a runaway water bottle for two minutes." You laugh a little. "And?" "I loved every second of it."

The room felt very quiet, because of how sincere he sounded. "Really?" "Really." Your fingers tightened around the phone. "Why?" There was a pause, his voice softened. "I like hearing you talk mama." You swallowed.

"Even when it's dumb stuff?" "Especially when it's dumb stuff." You smiled. "You're weird." "Probably." "A little?" "Maybe a lot." You laughed again, the sound made him chuckle too. The conversation continued for another hour. Jermajesty listened to every single word like it was the most important story he'd ever heard.

By the end of the call, your eyes were growing heavy. "You getting sleepy?" he asked. "Yes." A comfortable silence settled between you.

"Thank u for listening jer" The response came immediately. "Always baby" Your chest warmed. "Even when I talk too much?" Jermajesty laughed softly.

"Sweetheart, getting you to talk that much was the highlight of my day." That made you smile all the way until you fell asleep.