no wander why

Hello, this tumblr was inactive for a long time. I wrote here my experiences as an exchange student in SKKU, then as a Korean language student in Sogang. I then made a new blog when I was on a working holiday visa. The latter didn’t work out well though..

I have vivid memories even though all of this happened 3 years ago. I still have a lot to share. Since the pandemic started there has been an affluence of youngins getting into Korean culture. l see these videos on social media about how Korea isn’t like a drama and I think they’re right, people need to face the reality. However, there is no need to scare people.

I am thiking of bringing back this blog to life and write.. EVERYTHING that happened to me in Korea: the good and the bad, and the lessons I’ve learned.

If you have any questions about life as a student or working-holidayer in Korea, you may directly send me an email here: [email protected]. I WILL REPORT SPAM/P0RN-RELATED MAILS, DON’T TRY ME.

I just found a job in a company but I can't wait to quit. I'm still looking for something else and have a possible job interview this week and sent another cv.

Yesterday was my first day. And boy was it boring. I just have to make phone calls. Without knowing the background of the people or their relationship with the company. Yet I have to create a good relationship without sounding like I'm just selling something. Wth. Create a relationship in few minutes? Wth.

The main reason why I want to quit is that I didn't think I'd just do phone calls. I thought it'd be more about negotiations, via emails too, documentation but nah. I've been telling how my first day went and my friends be like "lol gurl, you could have been a telemarketer, it's the same thing". I KNOW.

A company called me yesterday for a social network/marketing position and I have experience in that, and it's more fun than doing phone calls.

I mean, I'm thankful my boss and coworkers are still nice. I know I have to start somewhere, and it's not like I'm doing some hard work like cleaning in a hostel so I know, I really shouldn't complain. If you knew the boss' requests though... so contradicting. I did try to change my way and be more friendly while trying to talk business (during the interview he gave me that advice after making me do phone calls as a test) but he be giving me the same advice, again.

I know I'm a beginner but how do you want me to learn if you don't give me info beforehand? And when I try to get info on companies you say it's a waste of time because I need to do many calls? What do you want :(

Do you guys also have that feeling when you start school or work or when meeting people, that it's not going to turn out well?

I honestly think this is going to look good on my resume but not help me grow. The only experience I'll gain is in maintaining relations with customers through 5min calls. I want to put in practice what I've learned about creating contents and marketing.

i have mixed feelings.. can i allow myself to be happy in this state? but the more we walk towards that path, the more i feel like this is not what i wanted? 

the main issue is that, i do not know what i want.

I try to understand why I feel sad sometimes.

I can't understand.

I've thought over and over again.

And maybe it's because I'm scared.

But I also remember that some people sincerely care about me.

I also remember that I can't let myself drown in something unecessary.

Unfortunately, I don't think I'll be able to dance at the 졸업식 next week. I will also have to wake up earlier because I don't want to wait in line for the elevator just because some lazy asses can't take the stairs to go up 2 to 4 floors.

I now know who throws up once in a while. Unfortunately, it's a girl I hung out with once and she's really nice. I wonder if she has actual problems that she tries to fight by keeping herself busy with some alcohol while watching tv alone in her room.

There's another girl who moved in recently and whom I interacted with. One evening, I heard her talking to herself while going to the bathroom. I heard her sighing and peeing, so I guess she left the door of the toilets wide open while she was doing her business. She then went back to her room, letting out her gasses in the hallway.

Tonight, I heard a girl crying. I thought it was a drama, but when I finished showering I heard it again. It was a heavy cry, like someone who just learned some terrible news. Hopefully, it wasn't something like that.

This place is fun fun fun. Sarcasm.