michelle4show

Im a hypocrite.

I'm the girl who tells everyone they're beautiful,

Who gives a dollar to the homeless,

And a smile to everyone in my path,

I laugh the loudest in my group of friends,

"Its always fun with you",

"I love hanging out with you",

I'm a woman who regularly attends church,

I give the pastor the biggest smile,

As I finish my day of giving advice and warm hugs to those around me,

I'm alone again,

I sit down in the solitude of my home,

The buzzing starts again,

The ache in my heart,

As my eyes start burning,

Because everytime I'm alone,

I remember,

The things that haunt me,

The hatred I have for myself,

I'm no longer distracted,

So yes, I'm a hypocrite

Again it wraps around my neck,

And suffocates me,

"I'm so tired",

"I'm so scared",

I choke out to the empty walls,

I'm scared...of myself.

Because my image is a lie,

The life I live is a delusion,

And its breaking me.

I feel my soul dying within me.

Oh wow I wish,