Not Broken Yet...

Take it from me, big houses aren’t good– I can’t find my way round mine, still getting lost around every corner. Pretty sure they’re always looking for people round here, you got a job preference?

I grew up in a big house, but I prefer small spaces. My parents and sister on the other hand, don’t. Oh, nothing to crazy. usually something with music, I used to play in bars and small gigs back in college. But now I have a degree in musical education and have no clue what to do with it.

I’m sure everyone would like that, Princess. Oh and as for finding something to do around here. I wish you good luck. There’s nothing, really. So enjoy sitting at home with your WiFi.

Do you call every girl you meet ‘Princess’? And if you know so much about what little there is to do here, why don’t you tell me where the nearest liquor store is?

No, usually we got drunk, and compared bruises. Which sometimes left things to go a reeall different way. Sometimes. Usually I was the one to conk out first and pass out, beer in my hand. But partying with them was better than boys because they usually didn’t draw on you. Except one time I woke up to an arm full of temporary tattoos.  Uuuugh, I feel like if you have certain voices, you should work jobs like that.

Oh, c’mon. You’ve got to get your tolerance up. I don’t think I’ve blacked out in a year, let alone pass out. But one time, my sister came to visit us from New Hampshire, and we took her to a New York party. I think we used three sticks of eyeliner just to draw on her for a straight hour. I’m surprised she even talks to me, but she has yet to ask when the next party is. 

“Yes.. I love that..But what do you regard as shitty television? That’s the question.”

Oh, usually soap operas to anything on the Disney Channel nowadays. But, I think I have a box set of F.R.I.E.N.D.S episodes somewhere around here.

Ahah! I think that’s why a lot of us do it, y’know? Crazy after parties, that’s all I’m saying. Well, I try not to, but she had one of those voices that caused dogs to bark.

Well damn, do I know about crazy after parties. Back in the city, I had a ton of friends that were in bands, and sometimes I would go up there and show them up with my voice, which was hilarious. Afterwards was always the best part, but I actually wan’t there for the girls, to be completely honest. I also had a math professor who sounded like a cat when she spoke about trigonometric functions. I still don’t know if that was on purpose of she just spoke like that all the time. I dropped the class a week later. 

I’m…so sorry. Shit. Are you okay? No, of course you’re not okay what am I saying. Shit. I’m sorry.

What do you have to be sorry for? Everyone’s reaction has been close to yours. Well, not mine, obviously. She’s gone...okay, now I need a fucking drink. Pronto.

It’s a small suburban town, darling…the list of things to do is kind of the generic same old same old. Although if you want hipster stuff or edgy activities the city isn’t that far away.

Nah, I lived in the city all my twenty two year. I came out here to get the hell out of there. I heard there were a few bars around here though, which seems pretty promising. 

Since I was 19, so like 5 years I have. They’re fun but yes, a bit. Easier to watch than it is to play, I think. But it’s still one of my favorite things! The only time I ever knock anyone around. Aww, that’s cuuuteeee. Cutey kiiitttyyy. She had like.. Sargent.. Somethingsomethingsomething, I dunno. I tuned her out when she spoke a lot.

I would imagine, I wouldn’t want to get crushed between girls...oh wait, I kinda would, but not in that way. Oh, I’ve mastered the art of tuning people out, most of them aren’t worth my time. 

Wh-what?

Please don’t make me repeat that again...I’ve only said it five times and it fucking hurts.

Maybe! We’re both in Lanford so just holler! Or stop by Munchers, that’s where I work. Or the derby track in the city if it’s the weekend. Ooh! Me too! I like funny names too. I knew a girl who gave her cat several names. It worried me, but it was cute.

You derby? Holy shit, that I’ve gotta see. My girlfr-uh, someone I know wanted to take me to one of those. Aren’t they super brutal? Basker had a middle name at one point, and two last names. But my forgetful ass forgot what the middle name was, so now he’s just Basker McColley-Anderson.

Not even working? Well, look at that– You’ve taken my ‘newbie’ title away, welcome to town. Sure, I don’t mind. Got a little time before I have to get back to work. What part of town you moved to?

Nope, currently on the hunt for a job. My parents got a place for me in Westbrook, even though they wanted me to get a bigger house. I said no since it was just me, my liquor cabinet, and my cat. 

I’m constantly spitting out love. I give out compliments freely, gotta make everyone feel special. I was always like that. My mom would tug me away from strangers because I told women they had nice hair. I’m too nice, but some people are too sad and they just need that in their lives. My mom would have, but when we moved from Philly to LA she just shoved everything we wanted in a car and started anew. Maybe. I like Baskers better. Or Pants. So many people name their cats Socks and Mittens but Pants is so underrated.

Maybe I should hang out with people like you more often. But I did the same thing, I ran away from what was happening. It seems to be working so far. I feel like I could own animals and name them all after articles of clothing. Mittens, Pants, Boots, you name it. Animals with odd names make me happy.

Or a chainsaw. I told you, I’ve been staying with my cousin for a while. On and off. I go to the city, I stay there, then I come back. It’s a long story which yes, is best told over lots of alcohol.

Okay why are you talking in past tense. I’m totally getting we-broke-up vibes from you. You did, didn’t you? It’s okay, I make a good shoulder to cry on too. Among other things.

Whatever you say, blondie. 

Shit...I’ve only been here a day. If I wasn’t so emotionally unstable, I’d have to go with...

1. Ophelia

2. Phoebe

3. And what the hell, if I liked dudes, I’d say Jude.