❝ a hundred thrown-out speeches i almost said to you ❞
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@noorasredlip
❝ a hundred thrown-out speeches i almost said to you ❞
welcome to @ noorasredlip ' s blog <3
requests are currently open !!
about me ⭒ rules ⭒ masterlist
dividers by @uzmacchiato

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
Free to watch • No registration required • HD streaming
Dating Sam Winchester headcannons (x fem!reader)
You fucking die
no lube, no protection, all night, all day, from the kitchen floor to the toilet seat, from the dining table to the bedroom, from the bathroom sink to the shower, from the front porch to the balcony, vertically, horizontally.
just a little soldier boy drabble because i can't get that mf out of my head...
being with soldier boy would feel like standing too close to a live wire and convincing yourself the burn is worth it.
at first, he’d seem almost impossible to get close to. not because he’s cold exactly (soldier boy is rarely cold) but because everything about him is defensive. every joke has teeth in it. every flirtation feels half like a challenge. even when he’s interested in you, there’s this sense that he’s waiting for you to disappoint him somehow.
and the worst part is that he’d make you work for every soft thing.
not intentionally, maybe. it’s just the way he’s built. he comes from a world where tenderness was weakness and vulnerability got beaten out of men before they even knew what to call it. so instead of saying things plainly, he circles around them. he’ll tease you instead of complimenting you. he’ll sling an arm around your shoulders instead of admitting he missed you. he’ll call you dramatic while secretly memorizing every expression on your face.
but once he decides you’re his?
god.
it would settle into something heavy and consuming.
he’d always have a hand on you somehow. fingers hooked into your belt loops. a palm against your lower back. his hand wrapped around your throat just lightly enough to remind everyone else in the room where you belong. and he wouldn’t even realize how possessive he’s being half the time — it would feel natural to him, instinctive.
people would notice it too. the way his eyes track you constantly, even while he’s pretending not to pay attention. the way conversations die a little when someone gets too friendly with you. soldier boy wouldn’t need to make a scene to intimidate people; there’s something worse about how quiet he gets when he’s jealous.
you’d see it in his jaw first.
that tiny clench.
the silence.
the way he suddenly starts drinking slower, staring longer.
and afterward he’d pull you into his lap like he has something to prove, all rough hands and smug little comments muttered against your skin while his grip tightens just a little too much.
the strange thing, though, is that beneath all the ego and aggression, he’d love with an almost embarrassing intensity. soldier boy is the kind of man who acts like he doesn’t need anybody while structuring his entire emotional survival around one person.
you.
he’d never say it like that, obviously. he’d rather die.
but it would show in these fleeting, almost accidental moments. the way he automatically positions himself between you and danger. the way he remembers exactly how you take your coffee after hearing it once. the way he checks your injuries with this furious kind of concentration, like he’s angry the world dared touch you at all.
and late at night, when the bravado starts slipping, you’d catch glimpses of the man underneath everything else.
the exhausted version of him.
the version that lies awake staring at the ceiling while an old war movie plays silently in the background. the version that gets quieter after too much whiskey, voice rough and distant while he talks about his father or the military or payback in these fragmented little pieces, like he hates himself for saying any of it aloud.
that’s when he’d touch you most gently.
not during the day. not when people are watching.
only here, in the dark, when he thinks vulnerability can still be hidden under exhaustion.
and if you ever saw him completely undone — genuinely scared of losing you — it would be terrifying.
because soldier boy doesn’t know how to love normally. he loves like something starving. like someone who spent decades being worshipped but never truly known, and now that he finally has you, the thought of losing it makes him volatile.
not softer.
sharper.
more protective. more possessive. more desperate.
the kind of man who would scoff at romance, roll his eyes at sentimentality, then hold you so tightly in his sleep it’s like he’s afraid you’ll disappear before morning.

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amor da minha vida
Is this toxic and violent?
Yes
But am I turned on as fuck?
Hell yeah
I probably need therapy but oh fucking well. What to do
DYLAN OBSESSION STILL GROWING AGAIN
pov: you’re jensen ackles’ controversially young girlfriend pt.3
pairing: nepobaby!reader x jackles
yourusername 10 hr ago
sabrinacarpenter 9 hr ago
yourbestieuser 6 hr ago
erinelairmoriarty 2 hr ago
genpadalecki 45 min ago
jensenackles
Liked by yourusername, jaredpadalecki and more
jensenackles Happy Birthday, sweetheart. I love you, and I love everything that comes with it. ❤️
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yourusername i love you so much, handsome 🫶🏻
jensenackles Love you more, pretty girl.
jeffreydeanmorgan Happy birthday, @/yourusername!! Have a great one! xx
jaredpadalecki Happy birthday, @/yourusername 🎉🎉🥳
karenfukuhara Happy bday, @/yourusername! Come back to Toronto, you two! We miss you guys 🫶🏻
karlurban Happy birthday, boss lady! Xx
Comments on this post have been limited.
yourusername
Liked by genpadalecki, yourbestieuser, jensenackles and more
yourusername cake, drinks, friends, my hot boyfriend, and the whole universe singing happy birthday to me… what else could a girl possibly ask for? 🤍
viewcomments
yourbestieuser i’m obsessed with you omg
sabrinacarpenter happy bday you slut i love you 🫶🏻
genpadalecki Birthday girl looking hot as always! 😻😻
jensenackles Happy birthday, baby. I love you. ❤️
erinelairmoriarty sexy & funny & smart & stunning bday girl 🥳
jack_quaid Happy Birthday! Sending love ❤️
Comments on this post have been limited.
pov: you’re jensen ackles’ controversially young girlfriend pt.2 pairing: nepobaby!reader x jackles
author’s note: you guys LOOOOVED the first one and i LOOOOVE doing these so i might as well keep going… lmk what you think
yourusername 2h ago
yourusername
Liked by jensenackles, yourbestieuser and more
yourusername seashells, sand and sunburns ☀️🐚🌊
viewcomments
yourbestieuser how did u even convince that man to put literal sand on him smh
yourusername 🤫🤭 deansgirl666 sickening omg 💔
acklesleather ok but why is no one talking abt the fact that she's literally a child? way too young for him omg
flowersforyn bro shes lit in her 20's thats an adult
jensenackles I did warn you about that sunburn
yourusername ur no fun destielschild guys that's married couple bickering omg we lost him mooselovescrowley im devastated
ynupdates hair so pretty it makes me want to shave mine off 👊
sabrinacarpenter screaming rn
♥ by author
jensenackles
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jensenackles Aloha! 😎
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butchersblunt need him to breed me im not even kidding
acklesinleather girl
jeffreydeanmorgan Awsome pictures! Have an amazing time! Xx
♥ by author
yourusername 🫨
jensenackles 🫣
winchstrlvr He looks so good oh my God.
yourusername
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youreusername see you some other time, hawaii... aloha 🩵
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genpadalecki Summer looks so good on you!
♥ by author
lovelyyn to have or to be lol
fishfuckergate shes so gorgeous tf
winchstrlvr Stop posting him just to get attention!
flowersforyn leave her alone omg get a job
jensenackles Aloha indeed 😏
♥ by author
yourbestieuser sexy
♥ by author
jensenackles
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jensenackles Fun times in Hawaii!
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yourusername picture thief 😤
jensenackles You have the best ones, baby winchstrlvr Baby?!
jaredpadalecki Awesome clicks!
♥ by author
butchersblunt i need to sit on his face so bad omg </3
deangirl666 so sexy i feel like throwing up
mooselovescrowley she's getting that d everyday 💔
acklesinleather im so jealous
yourusername 37 min ago
i might come back here and post again… who knows….

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
Free to watch • No registration required • HD streaming
pov: you’re jensen ackles’ controversially young girlfriend pairing: nepobaby!reader x jackles
yourusername
Liked by sabrinacarpenter and others
yourusername pulling an all-nighter at the airport so here's what life's been like lately 🦢🫧🤍
view comments
girlblogger6969 who tf is that omg 💔
sabrinacarpenter 🤭
yourusername 😝
ynupdates we’re fed 🙌
deansgirl666 IS THAT MY MAN JENSEN ACKLES????
chevybaby OMG I THINK IT IS winchestermania how can you tell lol chevybaby girl it’s literally the back of his head how can u not tell winchestermania i’m employed lmao
nicolewallace pretty girl 🙂↕️
yourusername ilysm
lovelyyn she looks so good wtf 😭
erinelairmoriarty ur the cutest
yourusername love uuu
yourbestieuser you look so soft omg shame you’re a RAT
yourusername i’ll kill you with a gun yourbestieuser you can TRY
jensenackles
Liked by jaredpadalecki, karlurban and others
jensenackles Flight back home was canceled because of the weather and I lost my passport 😤
view comments
acklesfan67 see guys he’s in canada not in la and not with yn
destielschild the pic she posted could be old plus did you even read her caption?? winchstrlvr pls he’d never go for somebody like her ynsloverrrrr she's hot and young and rich and funny and better than your ratty ass destielschild you ended them omg
deansgirl666 honey come home the kids miss you
driverpicksackles put that finger in my ass OMG WHO SAID THAT
butchersblunt GIRL WTF mooselovescrowley WHY WOULD YOU COMMENT THAT OMG </3
jaredpadalecki Gen and I will reschedule the barbecue so you’ll be able to make it!
jensenackles Thank you buddy 🙌
yourusername
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yourusername oh canada oh canada or however the song goes
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jack_quaid Come back to Toronto we already miss you! ❤️
♥ by author
acklesinleather WHY is SHE on the set of the boys????
winchstrlvr I know right? SO ANNOYING fishfuckergate let the girl live omg why are you guys so miserable thedeepdidwhat GIRL WHAT IS THAT USERNAME OMG
lovelyyn pls let me be your bsf i'll behave
ynupdates OMG ARE YOU GONNA DO A CAMEO ON THE NEW SEASON OF THE BOYS????
ynsloverrrrr can you IMAGINE omg i would die it would be so good for her career... winchstrlvr What career? She probably just got her father on the phone and he got her the part...
erinelairmoriarty DELETE THAT OMG
yourusername never!
sabrinacarpenter the S stands for Sabrina btw 💋
yourbestieuser you wish yourusername girls don't fight i there's enough me for everyone sabrinacarpenter slutty
driverpicksackles imma throw up that's litteraly my man 💔
deansgirl666 im so jealous wtf
flowersforyn the song????? gurl do you mean THE NATIONAL ANTHEM??????? 😭😭😭😭😭
yourusername 15min ago
jensenackles
Liked by misha, yourusername, jeffreydeanmorgan and others
jensenackles l've been watching "The Tonight Show" since I was 10 yrs old. Thank you ﹫fallontonight for the gift of being a part of it. It felt like home. Catch us tonight. There were some moments. 😆
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feliciaday Omg cooooool
♥ by author
jeffreydeanmorgan Proud of you my boy!! Can't wait! Big love.
♥ by author
driverpicksackles he looks so good im going to bash my head against a wall until it explodes
deansgirl666 impregnate me
jensenwithagun please i need him so bad
jaredpadalecki So proud of you, brother!
♥ by author
lovelyyn him posting this literally 5 minutes after ﹫yourusername posted that story omg
yourusername 🙂↕️
♥ by author
ynsloverrrrr OMG OMG OMG ynupdates GIRL WHAT DOES THAT EVEN MEAN flowersforyn WTF acklesinleather i feel SICK right now casfellfirst IM GOINT TO THROW UP WHY WOULD SHE DO THAT
Me waiting on y'all to make them stranger things fics
── ❝ tied him down to my queen bed ❞
pairing! soldier boy x fem!reader
summary! you want to spice up things, so you tie up soldier boy. (Inspired by "Freak" by Doja Cat.)
contents! no plot just porn, established relationship, rough sex, power play, light bondage, kinda sub/dom!soldier boy, degradation, edging/denial, overstimulation, names (sweetheart, doll, brat & bitch), dirty talk, praise & degradation kink, teasing, oral/face sitting (f & m receiving), and probably more; very intense and filthy sexual content so mdni 𖤐 18+ !!
word count! 1.4k
Not sure if this is too far but maybe some dads best friend mixed in with close calls and very rough stuff if ya know what I mean 😏
Stained
Word Count: 7.4k
Warnings/Tags: rough sex, degrading name calling (slut), mentions of a facial, cheating (soz Lucille), alcohol consumption, hair pulling, semi-public sex
It happened again.
By now, Negan knows the routine. Argue. Say shit neither one of them can take back. Lucille kicks him out or else Negan reaches his limit and storms out. Make up later. It’s their pattern.
But tonight is different.
They were supposed to go to a friend’s house for dinner, which threw a wrench in their usual routine. A part of Negan still wanted to go. Sure, he dreaded the tension-filled conversation, Lucille throwing in her usual passive-aggressive digs, but there was a silver lining: he could vent afterward. He needed to. To someone who’d actually get it, without the sugar-coating.
Negan has been friends with your dad for years, long enough to know they could trade a few sharp words and move on without it turning into some dramatic scene. Sometimes, Negan could really use that kind of blunt, no-nonsense talk with another guy.
i got this rubberband on my wrist
and i snap it everytime that i think about your lips.
✩ pairing: ex situationship!dean winchester x reader
✩ cw: angst, mentions of past sexual relations, kinda self-harm but not really ig ? (rubberbanding), emotional damage, brief alcohol use, terrible communication, dean being scared of his feelings, underwhelming one bed trope bc i didn’t write too much of it, and there’s definitely more but i’m lazy…
✩ summary: a failed affair, a rubberband on your wrist, and dean in every memory. months of longing, tension, and regret, threatening to break.
or
encounters between you, dean, and that stupid rubberband.
✩ author's notes: ok so i know i know i have requests just piling up but this idea came to me when i was driving and listening to that song i just had to do it. but i am pushing through my WIPs ok i swear. as always, feedback is welcome and feel free to comment or reach out idk lol!
credits go to @winchestermysterymachine bc i binge read her stuff and tried doing something similar but w tate.
you feel it before you see him. the hairs on your arm lift on their own—an automatic reaction. your body knows. dean winchester fills the doorway like he owns the place.
the rubberband digs into your wrist, thin and biting, a sting you’ve convinced yourself is enough.
snap. sharp, quick, just enough to make your chest unclench for a second.
you stand at the counter in bobby’s kitchen, pretending to read the scrawled notes tacked to the fridge, the smell of coffee and old wood heavy in the air. it should feel like home. instead it tastes metallic, clinging to your teeth.
dean looks at you. you don’t look back. you can’t.
the snap echoes softly in the small room, but he hears it. he always does. his eyes follow the motion of your hand, the faint flicker of red on your skin. every sting is a tether, every pull a reminder that you’re still here, still present, still… him.
he remembers: the way you used to laugh into his shoulder, the warmth of your hands curled around his, the press of your mouth against his neck in the dark. he remembers how he made promises without words, then let them dissolve the second you asked for something real.
snap. he flinches like the pain belongs to him.
“you still doin’ that?” his voice is low, rough — not meant for anyone else.
you don’t answer. your eyes trace imaginary lines on the fridge.
sam flips pages in the living room, oblivious. bobby mutters about wards and hunts. here, in this cramped space, it’s just the band, the silence, and the weight of everything neither of you can say.
snap. you press your thumb to the mark, rubbing it absentmindedly. pretending it isn’t there. pretending he isn’t everywhere.
dean swallows hard, jaw tight. his chest burns with memory and regret. you’re trying to erase him, and he deserves it. but fuck if it doesn’t gut him anyway.
later, when you lie awake in the spare room bobby gave you, the rubberband digs into your wrist again.
snap. the sting pulls you under.
suddenly you’re not in bobby’s anymore. you’re back in that narrow motel hallway, years younger, heart hammering as dean’s hand presses you against peeling wallpaper. the scrape of stubble along your jaw. the burn of his mouth. desperate, raw, urgent.
you kissed him back like you were starving. maybe you were.
his jacket smelled of smoke; his hands were too big on your hips, holding you as if he could keep the world from stealing you away. you remember whiskey on his tongue, the sound he makes when you tug his hair. your knees buckled when he dragged his mouth lower, promising nothing with words but everything with touch.
and then the crash: the quiet, the way he looked at you like you were too much — like you’d asked for something he didn’t know how to give.
snap. you’re back in bobby’s spare room, chest heaving, wrist stinging. the band leaves a red line you rub with your thumb, pretending it isn’t there. pretending he isn’t everywhere.
dean had never stopped haunting you. every flinch, every bite of pain from the band, every memory he stirs folds together until, for a moment, the past is present.
snap. you press the band harder, letting it mark you in a way nothing else can anymore.
✧˖°
the forest is too quiet after the kill. your lungs burn, blood still warm under your nails, adrenaline drumming in every vein. your knife drips onto the leaves, the dark liquid sinking into the earth.
you drag the back of your hand across your forehead, smearing sweat and dirt. then—snap. sharp. quick. necessary.
dean sees it in the moonlight: the red line blooming across your skin. his stomach twists. he shouldn’t care. he shouldn’t. but he does. always.
because he knows what it means. you’re grounding yourself, keeping the world at bay, keeping him at bay. and maybe part of you isn’t even trying anymore. every pull, every mark on your skin screams at him louder than any monster ever could.
he wants to reach for you. wants to grab your wrist, replace the sting with his mouth, with his hands. wants to hold you, steady you, claim you. but he doesn’t. he can’t.
snap. your pulse triples. he’s closer now — heat brushing your shoulder, the smell of smoke and leather thick in the cold air. his knee almost touches yours when he shifts, and it’s agony and longing in equal measure.
“you okay?” he rasps, careful.
you nod, not looking at him. “i’m fine.” snap.
it doesn’t feel fine. not really.
dean remembers motel nights, heated sheets, your nails in his back, your body pressed to his. the warmth, the ache, the way he let it slip through his fingers — the promises he never made.
snap. your wrist throbs. the band glints in the flashlight beam, fleeting but sharp. dean’s jaw tightens. every sting feels like punishment for the past, for letting you go, for every silent night he didn’t fight hard enough.
and still he stays. watching. wanting. snap. because he knows one day the band will break. when it does, he’ll have nothing to blame but himself.
✧˖°
bars after hunts are supposed to be loud enough to drown everything: jukebox moaning something half-country, half-blues; pool balls cracking; laughter ricocheting. you perch at the edge of the bar, a half-finished beer in front of you, rubberband snug on your wrist.
snap.
you pretend it’s about the hunt, about exhaustion, not about him. not about dean, a few feet away, leather clinging to him, the smell of smoke and whiskey sharp in the air.
snap.
he notices. he always notices. the twitch of your wrist, the red line under the band. his stomach tightens. every cell in his body hums, remembering how your fingers used to curl into his jacket, how your nails dragged down his back when he pushed too deep, how you whispered his name like both a secret and a plea.
snap.
dean leans on the bar, thigh brushing yours by accident or design. he sets down drinks — yours included — and pauses a beat too long, fingers resting on the glass. waiting for something. waiting for permission you won’t give.
snap.
the jukebox slides to something low and mournful. sam steps outside to make a call. now it’s just you and dean, silence heavy like gunmetal.
“you’re gonna bruise yourself,” he murmurs, eyes on your wrist.
“better than the alternative,” you say, soft and sharp.
his jaw tightens. he looks away, knuckles white around the glass. you twist the band harder.
snap. snap.
each sting a memory. each memory a dagger. dean feels every one, wishing he could reach for you, wishing he’d fought harder before.
you leave before he can say anything else.
sam is still on the phone; the night air is crisp and cold, but you push past it, past the smell of fried food and smoke, past the weight of leather and memory clinging to him. the rubberband bites your wrist.
snap.
dean doesn’t move at first. he just sits, staring at the empty space where you were, the echo of your presence heavy in the bar. his whole body wants to chase you into the night, to say all the words he’s swallowed since motel hallways and bobby’s kitchen — since that second he let fear choke out the promise you asked for.
but he doesn’t. because he doesn’t know if he can keep you. and the cruel truth? he already lost you trying not to.
outside, you tug the band again, wrist stinging, chest hollow. the sting is fleeting, but it’s the only thing sharp enough to cut through the echo of his voice — the way he leaned close like he still had the right, the way your body still ached to close that inch of space.
snap. dean finally breathes out, head sinking into his hands. the bar’s noise crashes back around him.
because every snap feels like a goodbye he deserves. and all he can think, useless and late, is: i wasn’t ready. god, i wish i had been.
✧˖°
weeks later, bobby’s garage smells of oil and rust, heat pressing down through cracked windows. tools clatter while you sort through a dented toolbox, trying not to notice dean across the hood of the impala — every movement of his body a reminder of what’s still tethered between you.
your wrist twitches. snap.
dean’s eyes catch the flicker of red and his chest twists. he shouldn’t care. he shouldn’t. but he does.
he slides closer, voice dropping rough. “that thing’s gonna leave a bruise.”
you don’t look up, thumb flicking the band again. “at least this one will fade.”
the wrench slips from his hand, clattering against metal with a hollow clang. silence follows, thick and brutal.
you shove a screwdriver into his palm without meeting his eyes. the brush of your fingers is fleeting, accidental maybe, but it sparks down his arm like electricity. he wants to steady the band with his hands, to press his mouth to the mark and erase weeks of tension. but he doesn’t.
snap. the sound ricochets in the garage, sharper than metal on concrete.
dean remembers nights pressed to you in motel beds, nails in his back, lips dragging moans from him he’d never admit out loud. he remembers letting it slip through his fingers, letting fear and cowardice win.
snap. you rise to stand beside him, reaching for another tool, brushing against him again. heat coils low in his stomach. his jaw tightens. every snap, every touch, every remembered whisper of skin on skin leaves him raw.
snap. and still he doesn’t move. he just watches, heart pounding, waiting for the band to break — because when it does, it won’t be just rubber snapping. it’ll be him, letting everything come undone.
✧˖°
the motel is a joke: peeling wallpaper, carpet stiff with stains, buzzing neon bleeding through cracked blinds. and there’s only one bed.
you drop your bag by the door, fingers already tugging the rubberband. snap.
“place is a dump,” dean mutters, tossing his jacket on a chair.
you stretch the band between two fingers. “not the worst we’ve stayed in.” snap.
the space between you hums with memory. motel sheets, heated nights, lingering touches, whispered names. every ache presses between you, unbearable.
dean’s eyes flick to your wrist. “you’re still at that, huh?”
you don’t look. “keeps me grounded.” snap.
he huffs, sitting on the edge of the mattress with the kind of distance that isn’t distance at all. “or it keeps you stuck.”
you tilt your head, heat rising. “better than pretending none of it happened.” snap.
dean’s jaw works, voice lower, harder. “you think i could forget?”
you breathe a laugh that isn’t a laugh. “seems like you’re trying pretty damn hard.”
silence. only the lamp buzzing and the rasp of his fingers against denim. he looks at the thin line the band leaves on your skin, the space you’ve carved away.
“you’re gonna mark yourself up doing that,” he says softer now, but dangerous.
you stretch the band again, slow, deliberate. “yeah. guess i like reminders.” the snap cuts the room like a gunshot.
✧˖°
one night there was no band.
your wrist is bare. weeks of stings and snaps, marks and memory, gone. it should be nothing — just skin, just veins — but dean feels it like a punch to the chest.
“forgot something?” his voice is low, leaning against the dresser.
you glance up, tired. “no.”
one word. flat. final. no snap, no warning.
the silence that follows hums in the room like the air itself is holding its breath. dean swallows hard, beer bottle useless against the weight of quiet. the bed creaks when you sit. no barrier, no rhythm to keep him out. just your body, steady, and the taut space between you.
he realizes— you’ve stopped fighting.
the band was never just a tic. it was armor, a warning, a tether. every snap said: i’m still here. i still care. i still won’t let you in completely.
now it’s gone.
dean’s throat burns. he wants to ask why, to pull it from your wrist and replace the sting with his hands, his mouth. but he doesn’t. he only croaks, “don’t… don’t do that.”
you lift your head, confused. “do what?”
“give up.” the words tear from him, raw and too late.
you stare, silent, wide-eyed. for the first time in weeks there’s no sharp sting to break the moment. only the ache of everything you’ve both held back, humming between you like a live wire. waiting to explode.
the silence stretches. no band. no snap to fill the void. just you, him, and air that trembles like glass.
dean’s words — don’t give up — hang there, reckless.
you sit straighter, heart hammering. “you don’t get to say that.”
his head snaps up. “the hell i don’t.”
“you’re the one who walked away.” your voice cracks, fragile as glass. “you made your choice, dean. you don’t get to call it giving up just because i stopped waiting.”
he drags a hand over his mouth, paces two steps like he can outrun it, then spins back. “i didn’t walk away. i—” he stops, jaw locking. “i wasn’t ready.”
your laugh is low and bitter. “that’s the thing. you never are.”
dean’s shoulders drop, suddenly older, tired; like all the hunts and grief and bad choices have finally caught up. “you needed something i couldn't give. that doesn’t mean you didn’t matter.”
the ache in your chest is unbearable. “then why does it feel like i’m the only one bleeding from it?”
he steps closer before he stops himself. the bed creaks as he sits at the edge, leaving a gulf that feels both too small and impossible to cross.
“you think it didn’t wreck me too?” his voice is hoarse, words scraped out like they’ve been clawing at his ribs for months. “every night i close my eyes i see you—hear you—hell, sometimes i swear i smell you. but i knew if i gave you what you wanted, i’d break it. and i couldn’t stand the thought of breaking you.”
you stare, chest heaving, skin prickling with heat. for the first time there’s no snap to ground you. only the sound of breath and the way his eyes pin you, unflinching and burning. the wire between you has never been tighter.
the silence is unbearable. your chest rises and falls too fast, each breath raw. his confession hangs heavy and alive.
dean’s still at the edge of the bed, shoulders hunched like a man waiting for his sentence. his fingers drum his thigh, restless, betraying how close he is to unraveling.
you swallow hard, voice breaking. “you don’t get to say those things and just… stop there.”
his head jerks up, eyes burning. “then tell me what you want me to do.”
the challenge hangs, daring and desperate. maybe the final cruelty— you wanted him for so long, and now he’s giving you the opening too late.
your pulse drums. suddenly you don’t care.
you move first. your hand fists in his flannel, dragging him toward you. the contact sparks like a live wire; months of tension collapse inward. his mouth finds yours like it’s been starving — bruising, devouring.
the bed groans as he hauls you into his lap, hands gripping your hips like they belong there, like they never should’ve let go. you taste salt and whiskey, feel stubble scrape your skin.
it’s frantic, messy, too much and not enough. you gasp, nails digging into his shoulders; he groans like the sound could undo him.
when he drags his lips down your jaw, rough and hot, he murmurs against your skin, “god, i missed you.”
your breath shudders out, sharp and uneven. “then don’t you dare let me go again.”
and for once, there’s no rubberband to sting, no empty promise to hold you back — just the snap of everything breaking loose, all at once.
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pov: text messages with bf!dean winchester
content warning: suggestive content
author's note: i just LOVE text messages so much and the concept of bf!dean is just *insert cynthia erivo*. anywayssss, as always, feedback is very much welcome bc i looove to hear what ya'll have to say!!! i've been very busy lately w midterms but i'll survive and be back very soon. been working on some requests and some soldier boy stuff bc i miss my wife. hope you guys are doing fine... i love youuu
i am AWARE that i’ve been MIA and that i have requests and wips sitting on my drafts for a long time now… but i have this social media au thing i did for jensen a while ago that’s been just waiting for its right time to shine and maybe you guys would like it??? lmk PLEASE cause i’ve been dying to release it but im so scared no one cares lol