Every time I see that last pic, I have to note that the funniest line is the one immediately after the highlight
Xuebing Du
KIROKAZE
taylor price

Janaina Medeiros
Lint Roller? I Barely Know Her
wallacepolsom

祝日 / Permanent Vacation

blake kathryn

NASA

⁂

Kiana Khansmith

titsay
Jules of Nature
he wasn't even looking at me and he found me

★
cherry valley forever
"I'm Dorothy Gale from Kansas"
occasionally subtle

#extradirty
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@noeieon
Every time I see that last pic, I have to note that the funniest line is the one immediately after the highlight

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I do think it's kind of funny when plot summaries are like "character A encounters the last person they expected...their ex." Idk about you guys I'd be less surprised if my new coworker/roommate/random dance partner was my ex than I would if it was, like, Megawati Sukarnoputri the first woman president of Indonesia.
Any of my exes could plausibly attend the same conference as me. But I'd be really surprised to encounter former US Secretary of State Condoleezza Rice
Which of these would surprise you more to find on the doorstep?
Your ex
Megawati Sukarnoputri, the first woman president of Indonesia
This poll is ambiguous if you (a) Don't have an ex or (b) Are Egyptian diplomat Hassan Gamal Ahmad Hassan, whose marriage to Megawati Sukarnoputri was anulled in 1972.
being as i am an idiot, and having been one my whole life, i just wanna say that i find it very easy to do nothing, and go nowhere. i eat chocolate late at night in the dark. i stand in the garden also. and i’m often waiting for something to happen. and i’m stupid.
Soldier, Poet, King
They’re on their way to Jade’s house btw.
i'm really glad 6 isnt afraid of 7 anymore and you could all stand to be more supportive of their relationship

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age regressing by 5 minutes so i can remember what i was just asked to do
writing hockey rpf but the romance plot slowly gets dropped as it becomes clear the entire thing is just an excuse to write fanfiction about my team making it past round one of the Stanley Cup playoffs
I play rhythm games on mute whilst listening to a completely different song
you need to see a doctor
*puts my hand on your shoulder* Don’t worry, I have your back. We’re gonna turn this crisis into a crwaswas

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Going outside with wet hair from showering is humiliating because everyone sees you and thinks stuff like "eww gross here comes the wet girl". But going outside with wet hair when it's raining? Unambiguous boon because now everyone is thinking stuff like "wow, she's so topical" and "her hair is a scathing critique of the times we live in"
feeling like I am perhaps downwind from an argument my brother in law is having with his fiancée about wedding planning
told him I made fun of him on tumblr but the notes are overwhelmingly in favor of snarf's
[new to sadism] I'm gonna hurt the blood out of you
[new to masochism] no 😦
[new to voyeurism] erm guys what's going on?
my nothing
funniest shit is going down on discord rn
we recently made a discord server for people who do drama at my school and a cis guy irl has randomly decided to one-sided beef with me. so i'm having a conversation when he rolls up & randomly pings me saying he wants more pronouns than me. and i'm like Well. This isn't hurting anyone. Maybe he'll do some introspection
so he tells me in addition to he/him, he'd also like they/them, it/its, and the "other" role. since i don't have they/them, he would therefore have more pronouns than me. so i congratulate him, but then i point out what that "other" means.
i have an en.pronouns linked on my discord with my neopronouns written down. i show him this. i explain what neopronouns are.
he then proceeds to copy&paste a list of 40 sets of neopronouns. just to "have more than me". at no point did i care about this hallucinated conflict so i tell him he wins
update: he's asking me to give him an "alpha/alphaed" pronoun set rn. i've told him that he needs to give me the full 5-word conjugated set before i do. this is the ultimate test for a 14 year old boy
this is what he came up with

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knowing how it tends to go with male authors and their wives it was probably marge who wrote the odyssey
"unbecoming" is such a great word. bro that shit was so rude you no longer Are