Sorry for not posting for like half a year, I've been losing motivation a lot more easily. America is in a really bad spot and I'm getting more stares as I walk the streets, I'm black and have been living in America as a teenage girl for 2 years now, and this is the worst it has gotten. I'm not sure if I'm safe outside anymore, and it doesn't seem that I'm safe on the internet either.
In the meantime, I hope my writing has improved :D
Ex hugs can affect new ones
Disclaimer, Y/N's gender can be changed to your liking, if your a boy then Y/N is a boy, no matter what!!
TW, IMPLIED PAST ABUSIVE RELATIONSHIP
You felt the familiar sensation of rubber coiling around your waist, and let out a long tired sigh.
You were too exhausted for the simple act of bracing for impact, too busy counting all of the times this has happened for the past week.
He was doing this…thing all the time now, clinging on to you like you were food.
This has been happening ever since you confessed to him.
You love him but no one can handle 24 hours of Luffy for a whole week straight!
You'd never complain, though.
Sometimes the cuddles can be fun and enjoyable, other times you want nothing more than to throw him off deck.
You've been tolerating this pretty well, given how annoying this must look. You're actually more occupied with trying to guess what he's trying to accomplish by doing this. One thing you know about captain is that he never does anything that doesn't have a set goal.
You never got around to asking him, it feels like you'd lose if you did.
Lose what? You don't know either.
You lay in bed tonight trying to find out what he's trying to do, night times being a small mercy when Nami doesn't allow him to step even a foot into the room, when you had the brilliant idea to ask your dearest Navigator.
Your relationship with your captain wasn't exactly a secret, as if Luffy could even keep one, so you and Nami and sometimes Robin would ask you about what being in a relationship was like. You were too shameful to ask any of them about this problem beforehand because of how it makes you look like you don't even know your own boyfriend.
But now your sleep deprived brain is apparently incapable of feeling any sort of embarrassment, so you throw your shame out the window and give the only other person in the room (Nami) the most apologetic smile you could muster up when you see her putting away the book she was reading for sleep.
“So… Relationships, huh?” You can visibly see the sweat gather on Nami's brow, her body now facing yours.
“Are you trying to mock me.”
“No- uh.. Can I ask you a really super duper important question th-”
“If it's about Luffy, then I'm no help, you'd probably get better answers asking Ussop.”
“And risk him telling Luffy? No way!”
Nami let's out a deep, over exaggerated groan that kinda sounds like a distorted “FIIIIINE” while throwing her head back.
Wow, dramatic much?
You explain the situation, which she's been seeing physical proof of this past week, while watching her face for any signs of judgement.
“So what you just told me.. Is that Luffy wants more attention than necessary”
“Mhm!”
“And he needs it so much, that the second you gave him permission, he latches on to you for almost the whole day,”
“Yup!”
“And I also need to bring up the fact that I had to threaten him multiple times to get out of my room to not sleep on your bed, because all he has is a hammock for one person...”
“Your gettin it!”
“And you don't know why.”
You slightly bow your head at that one.
Nami looks at you with a blank face, before it screws up into confusion and disdain. “Is the stupidity transferable through a kiss or something?”
Even though the message wasn't nice, you still furiously blushed, “We.. Never kissed before..”
She face palmed so hard you flinched.
༶•┈┈⛧┈♛
The next lovely morning, you made your decision while sitting on your bed, an hour after you usually got up.
You would talk to him, it's unavoidable anyway.
Your stomach clenched at the thought of a bad ending to this. You always tell yourself that you've healed, but this type of jaw clenching fear still encapsulates you anytime you bring up something that could be taken as complaining, even if it isn't.
Relationships are all about this communication thing, right?
Besides, this is Luffy we are talking about.
Luffy isn't them. And they will never be Luffy.
So you took a deep breath and stood up.
♛┈⛧┈┈•༶
.
You're both in the lookout, after asking him to go somewhere private together he very happily complied.
Your twirling your thumbs together as you explain it to him, as if being caught in a lie.
You look at the floor in shame, some instinctive fear hugging your insides making them feel all mushy.
So you hug yourself, uncaring of how it might look.
This is pathetic, why are you complaining about something as simple as this? Luffy must be judging you so hard, probably ecstatic at the excuse to be mad at you.
Before you can shake off those dark thoughts that make you feel sick to your stomach, you can hear Luffy saying something.
To make things worse, your dumb brain decided to tune him out.
Looking back up at him with tired eyes, you asked in a small voice to repeat what he just said.
“I said that you looked sad allll the time!”
“Sad..?”
“Yeah! Makino always told me that when your sad, all you need is a hug to cheer you up! Hugs cheered me up all the time when someone did them.”
“Huh”
You smiled at him, and let your hands fall to your side.
Even though the panic curling around your heart will most definitely come back with a vengeance, you're glad that this was all it was.
Still, you must look like an idiot, sweating over something so simple.
“I wanna hug you right now, can I?”
You laughed a little at his way of asking, unsure if the hug was for him or you.
Wordlessly, you opened your arms to let him coil around you.
But unlike that familiar sensation of rubber, all you feel are two normal sized arms around your waist.
Reciprocating the hug feels like breathing, relief flooding your veins at the realization that nothing bad has happened. He wasn't mad.
You let out a shaky breath and realize you've been holding it longer than you thought.
Distantly, you think you can hear a mumbled apology.
⋆ ˚｡⋆୨୧˚ ˚୨୧⋆｡˚ ⋆
