Ari ❀ she/her ❀ 19

When you join Neytiri, you feel nervous. And it’s not because of her anymore, but because Neteyam promised to join you too, and you’re scared you might run into him any minute now. But as you walk with her to your marui to retrieve your weapons, and head into the trees, there is no sign of Neteyam. 

“This is my ikran,” Neytiri pats the greenish-yellow creature on its head with a smile.

The sound the ikran makes terrifies you, but she only laughs at your reaction. You've heard stories about the forest clans riding ikrans, but you've never seen one up close, let alone flown on one. You also knew of the special bond that exists between the forest Na’vi and their ikrans; they could only choose one for the rest of their lives, and in return, the ikran had to choose and remain loyal to them. This bond was unbreakable, for life.

“You will fly with me,” Neytiri explains, as she checks the armor on her companion. You watch her attentively. “We will hunt later, so you can try shooting in the air.”

You nod your head, taking a step closer. The ikran lets out another sound but Neytiri quickly calms it down, encouraging you to keep closing the distance. A few moments of patience pay off when the ikran lets you pat its head. Overwhelmed, you let out a breathy laugh.

“Now, let’s go,” Neytiri jumps on the back of the ikran, helping you up.

“Is Neteyam going to join us?”

“He is with his father,” Neytiri says, as she pushes the straps of the armor into your hands, “Grab on these. Neteyam will come if they finish early.”

You take a deep breath, as you feel the ikran jerk under you. A big wave of air hits you in the face, as you grab harder onto the handles not to fall. When you gaze down at the view below, you feel your heart race. You never even dreamt of flying but this seems like something you were waiting for your whole life. 

As you fly higher and higher, you notice how confident Neytiri is in her movements. She controls the ikran with ease, guiding it smoothly around curves of the cliffs, between trees and small nooks. You grip the armor of the ikran tightly, fear and adrenaline rushing through your blood.

Neytiri takes a dip, and as you feel exhilarated by the sensation of the wind running through your hair, you let out a laugh. She looks back at you with a toothy grin.

“Tie your feet,” she shouts, slowing down the ikran.

You obey, tying the straps around your feet to the armor.

“Done,” you shout back.

Neytiri makes a slow turn. She circles around a small lake, hidden between the green of the island. Just above the water, you can see a small flock of tetrapterons, graciously soaring.

“Take out your arrow and bow,” Neytiri orders, “We will take them by surprise. Some birds will fly away but some will fly right at us. That is your best chance.” 

“I’m ready,” you reply with a newly gained confidence.

You ready your bow, adjusting in your seat, and praying to Eywa that you won’t fall off. As Neytiri’s ikran circles closer, you feel alert at the sheer number of them. Neytiri navigates the ikran around the flock, and immediately, loud screeches strike your ears, as the birds disperse. 

Focused, you take one look to find your prey. You take an aim, and feel a rush of adrenaline, as you release the arrow and watch it hit its target. You shriek in excitement, marking your victory.

“Well done!”

“This is great!” you shout, raising your hands over your head, and feeling the wind.

After some more flying, you get to see Neytiri in action. She’s graceful and fast, her arrows shooting through the target every single time perfectly, while she’s still flying her ikran. You hunt for a bit more, diving to collect your prey before returning back. You jump off to the ground, adrenaline rushing through your veins, as you watch Neytiri feed the ikran with one of the birds you caught.

“Oh, that was incredible!” you grin ear to ear, earning a smile from Neytiri.

“You are a skilled hunter, Y/N,” she compliments you,  “And you have never flown before.”

“I can’t even imagine how exciting it is when you have a connection with the ikran,” you come closer, petting the creature that has already grown used to you.

“It is. It’s a connection for life,” Neytiri confirms, “You feel everything they feel. The freedom, the wind.”

You watch her with admiration, recalling the way she hunts. You don’t think you have ever even come close to being as graceful as she is. Not even in the water.

The two of you sit on the grass, the ikran stretching not too far away from you, closing its eyes. Neytiri lets you catch your breath before giving you the task of removing the arrows from the birds you caught.

“You turned down Neteyam last night,” she suddenly says, and you feel your heart picking up on a faster rhythm, “Did he do something stupid?”

“Not at all,” you shake your head, avoiding her eyes.

“Then why? Have you chosen somebody else?” while her voice remains soft, you feel pressured.

“That is not the reason,” you sigh, “I… I like Neteyam. I think he is kind.”

“And you?” she nudges you with a small smile.

“And I am not worth him,” you shrug your shoulders, hoping that your answer would satisfy her.

“Nonsense,” Neytiri shakes her head, “Tell me the truth.”

You fall silent, biting down on your lip. You didn’t even have the guts to explain it properly to Neteyam, let alone to his mother. Hell, you didn’t know what to say to yourself. She doesn’t know that the thoughts of Neteyam have been driving you crazy. You feel guilty and frustrated because you can’t go back home but you also feel like you don’t deserve to live a new happy life here. You won’t be able to make him happy. 

“Y/N,” Neytiri says, putting her hand on your shoulder, “Whatever is holding you back can be fought. The Great Mother guided you through the water, she helped you survive for a reason. Nothing should stop you now.”

“I don’t want to hurt him,” you whisper, “Now is not the time.”

“I used to think that when I met Jake. But it’s never going to be the right time.”

You look back at her, searching for more answers. You recall the stories Neteyam told you about his parents the night you spent together. When you first heard them, you thought they were brave to choose each other. Maybe even a little selfish.

“Mom,” your ears perk up at Neteyam’s shout, as he jumps off his ikran.

Neytiri waves her son over, and as Neteyam walks up to you, you notice blood on his forehead.

“Y/N,” he greets you with a forced smile. You awkwardly greet him back.

“What happened to you?” Neytiri stands up to examine his forehead, then circles him, looking at his back, and arms.

You jump to your feet too, following her expressions, in case she finds something.

“I’m alright, you should see dad,” Neteyam chuckles, then winces, as Neytiri slaps his arm.

“What did you two do? I told you not to be careless!” she gets angry. 

“Nothing,” Neteyam pulls away, “We were flying around the cliffs of another island but there was a thick fog. Dad couldn’t see anything, so he hit a cliff. I was just behind him…I didn’t hit anything but when he fell, he took me down with him.”

“Stupid!” she scolds him, “Where is he?”

“At Tsahik’s,” Neteyam winces again, shaking off his arm. He must have hurt it, you think.

“Come,” Neytiri orders.

︵‿︵‿︵‿︵

Jake looks exhausted and in pain, his forehead creased with a frown. Neytiri sits next to him, peppering him with questions while Ronal tends to his wounds. You and Neteyam sit back, the awkward silence between you palpable. He avoids your gaze, and you can’t really blame him for that.

“No, that wasn’t fog," Jake’s voice catches your attention.

"What then, Ma'Jake?" Neytiri leans forward, her expression curious. 

"It was smoke," Jake replies, his breath ragged. "I could smell it. And it was too thick. I couldn't see a thing."

You cover your mouth in shock, as a realization hits you. If the smoke was caused by the sky people, it means the trouble is closer. Ronal throws a quick glance at Neteyam, before shoving one of the balms she just used into your hands. When you look at her, confused, she points to Neteyam’s forehead, covered in blood.

You curse Tsireya for abandoning you to assist Tsahik. She never leaves her mother alone, she is the tsakarem! You know that it was exactly her intention to leave you with Neteyam.

“No need, I can do it myself,” Neteyam raises his palms to stop you, but Ronal only tsks at him.

He can’t even see his wounds, let alone treat them, you think. With your breath shaky, you walk to Neteyam, taking in the damages on his arms and forehead. You hope that by the time you get to it, Ronal will take over, so you don’t have to stare at his face. Neteyam looks at you from underneath his lashes.

“Sorry, I wasn’t there today,” he mumbles, “I know I promised but…”

“You don’t have to apologize,” you say quietly, “It was fun.”

“I told you,” Neteyam gives you a small smile.

Knowing him, he can’t stay mad at you forever. He knows it’s wrong to be petty. Still, it hurts. 

You gently shove him to turn around to examine the multiple cuts on his back. He’s not bleeding but they look nasty. You take a breath before applying some of the balm onto his wounds, and you see his muscles clench.

“Shit,” you hear Neteyam wince.

You remember the same balm used on you when you first arrived, and the burning pain that followed. Hesitantly, you lean closer to blow cold air on his wounds. Neteyam's back muscles slowly relax under the feeling. It is not enough to stop the pain, but it's still a small relief. You blow a few more times before the burning dies down.

“Turn around,” you order quietly, and he complies.

You feel blood rushing to your cheeks, as you take one of his arms, to tend to the wounds you saw earlier. Neteyam watches you carefully, wincing as you start applying the balm. Instinctively, he tries to jerk his arm away but you hold him in place.

“Mawey,” you whisper. He clenches his jaw but stops moving.

After you finish applying the balm to his other arm, you realize that the adults have slipped away. You heard Ronal being rushed to treat an injured Na’vi, but not Neytiri and Jake leaving.

“Almost done. Now, the nasty one,” you breathe out, pointing to Neteyam’s forehead. 

He closes his eyes, preparing for the pain, but instead of the balm, you take a damp cloth to his forehead. He flinches in surprise underneath the soft touch and opens his eyes.

“It’s a big cut,” you explain, “I need to clean it first.”

“Y/N,” Neteyam’s voice is low, “About last night.”

You gulp down, nervously, not meeting his eyes, instead focusing all of your concentration on cleaning his wound. But he’s so close, you can feel his breath on your skin.

“You didn’t have to explain anything to me. I-I,” he takes a shaky breath, "A mature Na'vi must face rejection because you can't force your heart to feel something it doesn't. And if you don't feel the same for me as I do for you, then I must accept that without question."

He is too noble for his own good, you think. You stop, and lower your hand to look at his face. 

“Neteyam, you got it wrong,” you let out a deep sigh, “I didn’t reject you because I don’t have feelings for you. I turned you down because I’m scared that it could ruin us and jeopardize you as the future of your family.”

Neteyam frowns, trying to process your words. This whole time he had been so certain that you simply didn't reciprocate his feelings, that he had almost grown used to that idea.

“Why are you scared?” Neteyam takes your hand in his, giving it a reassuring squeeze, “You know I will do whatever it takes to protect you.”

“‘Teyam,” you whisper, too overwhelmed to meet his gaze.

He releases your hand and cups your cheek tenderly, bringing your foreheads together. Though you're standing, towering slightly over him, it doesn't distract from the moment.

“Please, just for a moment, let me be honest with you,” Neteyam says, nuzzling your face, “Will you?”

“I will,” you agree. All he has to do is ask, you’ll always agree.

“I see you, Y/N,” Neteyam whispers.

You feel your breath catch in your throat. You knew he was going to say it but it still felt unexpected. Neteyam's fingers caress your cheeks with love, waiting for your response. With anything. As long as he gets a response. You lean in and touch his lips with yours, and both your hearts start racing.

There is a small pause before Neteyam kisses you back softly and slowly.  You close your eyes and give in to him, as he pulls you closer and closer, until there's no more space left between you.

Overwhelmed, you eventually pull away, catching your breath. A toothy grin appears on Neteyam's face, making your heart ache with love. You wish you could always make him smile like this.

“Now is not the time, Neteyam,” you try to discipline him but instead his smile grows even bigger. Is he mocking you? 

Your cheeks flush with heat as you try to calm down your racing heart, but Neteyam only seems to find your reaction funny. He reaches his arm to touch yours.

“I feel the happiest,” he says.

“It’s not the time,” you repeat again, trying to sound stern this time, “You’re bleeding again.”

You notice red running from his wound, and sigh, as you take the cloth, and start cleaning it. Neteyam follows your movement with a smile resting on his lips but he lets you work.

You can’t really believe that you kissed Neteyam. You tried resisting before getting sucked into the fantasy of being his, but the thoughts of returning home continue to nag at you. 

He doesn’t know that it’s been days since you thought about it. Going home. The nightmare you had about your sister has left you feeling like Eywa was trying to send you a message. So you desperately wanted to check for yourself. What if she’s been alive this whole time waiting for you to come home? What if she’s with Eywa now, and you've neglected to send your prayers, instead living a new life? Just the thought of it makes you feel sick. You know that you can't wait any longer.

Neteyam lets out a soft gasp, bringing you back to reality. You blow on the balm you've just applied to his forehead to ease his pain.

“Thank you,” he places his palm on your waist. 

“You’re welcome.”

“Now nothing will hold me back from being yours,” he says, taking your hand and placing it over his heart.

“Neteyam -”

“I know, I know,” he interrupts you, “You think this is not the right time, but what matters to me is that you reciprocated.”

“Of course I did,” you decide to tease him, switching the topic, “I couldn’t break your heart, when you had blood all over you.”

“Is that so?” he quirks his eyebrow, eyes twinkling,“If I had known that it takes me getting hurt to be treated so nicely, I would have got hurt a long time ago.”

“That’s not funny,” you slap his chest, earning him a laugh.

For a second, you’re reminded of the plan you had. You hang your head low before speaking.

“I can’t promise you anything right now, ‘Teyam. Not until I am sure.”

“Sure about what?” he looks at you confused.

“There’s just something that...I need to be certain of before I give in to this,” you say, gesturing between you. You feel terrible for getting his hopes high. Why did you have to kiss him?

“I’ll wait,” he says. You look up at him in surprise, “However long it takes.” 

You had everything planned out. It was so simple before he had to come in and mess up your head. You would sneak away in the dark, hoping to get to the Eastern shore by the morning. With a healthy young ilu, the journey would take less time now, and you were confident that your instincts would lead you by the same route you took when you escaped before. You had to see your home.

Neteyam is a distraction. He would come in, trying to save you, hold you back. He will fight you, and push your buttons, telling you that it is a bad idea. Make it harder for you to leave.

︵‿︵‿︵‿︵

The following week seems to drag on even slower than before, with no news of new attacks. While it seemed like something good, in reality, you were scared that the sky demons were planning a bigger strike. Lo’ak has a theory that they were tracking you down with their fancy weapons, instead of wasting resources on other villages. Neteyam discredits his brother to make the rest of you feel better, but, judging by his eyes, you think he believes it too.

During these days, it’s hard for you to keep your distance with Neteyam, especially when you’re  not alone. Despite his promise to wait for you, there is this new spark in him that makes him act carelessly. He can’t hide it around the others, staring at you and touching you at every opportunity he gets. Overwhelmed, in return, you overcompensate by ignoring him. You can’t let anyone find out. Because once it’s out in the open, you’ll feel pressured to become mates. And you were not ready.

︵‿︵‿︵‿︵

“What the hell, Neteyam? I almost had it!” you shout at him in anger.

“It was going to swim away if I hadn’t shot,” he responds with a self-assured tone, like he is talking to a child.

It was early in the morning, when you decided to head out for some hunting near the caves at the back of the island. And just as you were about to feel the sweet satisfaction of catching a srakat that you’ve been preying on, an arrow whizzed past you and struck the fish.

Neteyam found your expression amusing, not knowing the effort and patience you had put into finding those damned srakat caves, nor did he understand how much it annoyed you when someone interrupted your hunt.

“You should have minded your own business!” you hiss at him.

Neteyam rubs his eyes, and you can’t believe his audacity. He ruined your hunt and now he’s the one rubbing his eyes like he’s about to get a headache?

“Did I ask you to help me?” you ask him, feeling your blood boil.

“Oh forgive me, Neteyam, my savior,” you mock him, “What was it you called yourself? The mighty warrior? Well, can a mighty warrior return to being his mighty self and leave the real hunters to actually hunt?”

“When it comes to swimming, I get it!” he throws his hands in the air, exasperated “I always listen to you because you grew up in the water. I know you know better, so I listen to you -”

“Exactly!” you interrupt him, feeling a surge of irritation.

“Let me finish,” Neteyam rolls his eyes. “But when it comes to hunting, why can’t you trust someone who has been holding a bow and arrow in his hands before he started walking?”

“Do you think you’re the only one that hunts?” you ask him, confused. “Catch up, forest boy. We know how to use bows and arrows, but spears are easier when hunting down bigger prey. Especially srakat.”

“A good hunter works with precision and a small window of time, your method was doomed from the beginning,” he argues.

“It’s not about precision, it’s about patience and force! You can’t possibly shoot a srakat from a distance. If it spots you, you’re never going to see it again. You were just lucky that we were so close to it, otherwise your arrow wouldn’t even poke its armor.”

“Yet, who’s the one holding the trophy?” he raises his eyebrow at you, expectantly. 

“Now you’re just pissing me off on purpose,” you hiss at him.

His ears flutter in response. Neteyam attempts to cover them with his hands but it is too late. Is this what you think it is? Did seeing you this angry suddenly bring him pleasure?

“You, skxawng. Are you seriously this excited seeing me angry?” you can’t believe him.

“No,” he denies, “On the contrary, I’m frustrated with your stupidity!”

“You’re the stupid one!” you poke his chest with your finger.

It takes you by surprise when he wraps his fingers around your wrist. You’re standing too close to each other, your breaths catching. Neither of you looks away, trying to read each other's thoughts.  It's been a while since he's been this close to you since your kiss in the marui, and you’re suddenly reminded why. Your gaze falls to his lips, sending him a sign. Neteyam kisses you, and this time you can’t pull yourself away.

Your bodies embrace, holding each other tight, and as you kiss, it feels like the two of you are fighting over who gets to taste more. You pull him closer by the nape of his neck, and a soft moan escapes his lips. He kneels, and you follow suit, the kiss unbroken. 

Kissing him is overwhelming, greedy. You sit on him, wrapping your legs around his waist. Neteyam places your hand on his chest, and you can feel his heart beating rapidly. He reaches for your queue, and you don't resist.

“Y/N,” he gasps, pulling back, “Stop.”

“What is it?” you ask offended.

“Eywa,” he says. You notice he's holding your queue between his fingers. He lets it slip away.

“She hasn’t blessed us,” you voice his concern out loud, “Not as mates anyway.”

“What do you mean?” Neteyam’s ears perk up in surprise, “Did she give you a sign about me?”

“Kind of.”

“Tell me,” he is eager, it amuses you.

“No, I think it might go to your head,” you tease him, with a playful smile.

“Y/N,” his voice is so serious, you crack.

“Alright,” you roll your eyes, letting your fingers wander over his broad shoulders, “The other day, when we were at the Spirit Tree, and it was windy, a seed floated around me, and then around you.”

“Why didn’t you tell me?” Neteyam looks at you offended. You find it amusing.

“Because you were really getting on my nerves back then,” you admit, “And honestly, you’re still kind of annoying me now.”

“I’m the annoying one?” Neteyam’s face lightens up with a sleazy smile.

Before you know it, he pins you to the ground, hanging above you. He seems to like this position a little too much. His fingers tickle your stomach and neck, forcing giggles and squeals from you, as you try to escape. 

“Neteyam, stop!” 

“Say you’re sorry!” he demands, pausing for a moment to give you a chance to save yourself.

"I'm not going to lie," you reply, your voice catching in your throat as he continues to tickle you, "FIne! I'm sorry! I give up!"

“Sorry for what?”

“Not telling you sooner!”

“And who am I?” he quirks his eyebrow.

“Neteyam,” you whimper, but he shakes his head, “‘Teyam!”

“Hm,” he pretends to think about it, “Not bad but you have to try harder if you want to get out of here still alive.”

You feel out of breath, smiling like a fool. You know exactly what he wants to hear.

“The mighty warrior,” you let out. His face immediately lightens up.

“Smart girl,” Neteyam leans in, nuzzling his forehead against yours.

“You called me stupid two seconds ago,” you huff but he shuts you up with a gentle kiss.

Words can’t describe how giddy you feel. It's unbelievable. You’re kissing him Neteyam. Just a few weeks ago, you despised him with every fiber of your being. Your grandmother used to say that hate is a form of love, and you're starting to believe that now. Because at this moment, it feels like there's no one in the world except him. With his lips on yours, and his hand gently cupping your cheek while you play with his braids, you feel all the negative thoughts being pushed out of your mind.

“Oh, sweet Eywa,” you pull away from him, suddenly realizing.

“What?”

“Is that why you’re annoying me? Because I was ignoring you,” you accuse him.

“What, no way,” he denies, yet it’s so easy to spot his lies.

“You’re lying, you skxawng!” you wrap your arms around his neck, “Look at that sleazy grin on your face. And your ears! They were fluttering when I was yelling at you!”

Neteyam cracks under your gaze, and starts laughing. You take a second to admire this sound. It’s so genuine, so warm. Oh Eywa, you wish to hear that laughter every day. You gaze into his golden eyes with so much love, you feel like your heart is going to burst.

“What are you thinking about?” Neteyam asks softly, noticing how quiet you got. 

“I see you, Neteyam.”

︵‿︵‿︵‿︵

Like on the schedule, the storm doesn’t take long to arrive. Tears blur your vision as you witness a Tulkun floating on the surface with its eyes closed. There are blurs of bright orange at her sides that confirm she’s been killed by the sky demons. Devastation fills the air, with Ronal trying to revive her soul sister, praying to Eywa. But everyone knows it's too late. When she finally gives up, a painful shriek breaks the silence. You sob quietly, as you feel Neteyam’s hands wrap around you in comfort. You can’t imagine what it feels like to lose a soul sister.

When Tonowari calls for a meeting, there is a mixture of anger and sorrow in the air. The Metkayina hunters wear their armors, holding weapons in their hands, ready to fight. Tonowari orders everyone to prepare to avenge the death of Tulkun. 

Jake jumps into the circle, pleading with him to stop. He thinks that it is a trap set by the sky demons to lure them out, that they’re planning something worse. When the others try to silence his father, Neteyam intervenes, asking them to listen. His desperation weighs heavy on your heart. Jake raises a piece of metal retrieved from the Tulkun's side, causing everyone to fall silent.

“You tell the Tulkun, if they are hit by one of these, they are marked for death,” he says.

Tonowari seems to listen. He orders the clan to pass the message to their soul-brothers and soul-sisters, and tell them to leave before it’s too late.

︵‿︵‿︵‿︵

“I’m sorry, ‘Teyam, but you gotta move out of the way,” you sigh, tired of arguing with him.

“I’m not letting you go there, it is too dangerous,” his accent becomes more evident with the anger building up inside, “Let’s wait. I will talk to dad, we will think of something safer.”

“I don’t need you to talk to your dad!” you grow frustrated with him, “I don’t need you involving anybody else. I have thought about this. I know what to do.”

“It’s risky, Y/N, you know it is.”

“I do. But they’ve sent us a clear sign,” you point at the water, reminding him of the dead Tulkun, “They know exactly where to shoot now. Exactly where to hurt. And I can’t keep going on like this… I need to know what happened before I lose my sanity, sitting here and waiting for death,” you’re so tired, you’re ready to break down right here. Just to feel him wrap his arms around you and comfort you.

“Y/N,” Neteyam’s gaze softens at the tremble in your voice, “I can’t lose you.”

“This is why I didn’t want you to -” you stop yourself before you say something hurtful. It’s really not his fault that you gave in to this fantasy of being his, “Please. Move.”

It’s only a second of hesitation on his side but it’s just enough to give you an opening. You charge past him into the water, your ilu already waiting. The cool water rushes over you, as you swim ahead, determined to get as far from him as you can. You hear his voice call out to you.

“I’m not letting you go there alone!”

The death of Tulkun has only added to your fears of the sky demons targeting the Metkayina. Your nightmares have become more frequent. It’s the same one, every night,  and you just can't wait anymore for another sign from Eywa. You need to figure out for yourself what happened to your home, and to your sister.

When Neteyam caught you sneaking at night, it wasn’t hard to guess that you were trying to leave the perimeters of the village. Of course, he is worried about your safety. You'll be alone in the open water, with the sky demons lurking nearby, looking for their next prey. What if they spot you before you can hide? What if they catch you? He’s not going to lose you right after he spilled his heart out to you. It’s not fair.

It’s still dark out, as you swim ahead, following your instincts. You can sense that Neteyam is close behind but you don’t acknowledge him. You're determined to see this through.

︵‿︵‿︵‿︵

As the sun rises, you and Neteyam arrive at the village. You can feel your heart sink at the sight of what remains of it. It’s hardly recognizable: everything you knew and loved has disappeared into smoldering ruins.

You unlink from your ilu, taking a few steps further. Even the sand underneath your feet seems to be dark gray from the fire. Your eyes roam over the burnt structures of the old maruis and the pieces of clothes and weapons scattered on the ground, showing how little regard the sky demons had for your Na'vi.

You feel the weight of guilt and anger welling up inside and crushing down on you, as you continue walking. You stop when you step closer to the remains of a marui where your sister and her mate used to stay. It was easy to tell apart from the others: as the leaders of the clan, they used to have a big home. You were always jealous of all the space they had, which from the very beginning was destined for the children they were going to have. Streams of tears rush down your face, and you can’t help the sobs threatening to close up your throat. 

Neteyam, who was right behind you all this time, gently rests his hand on your shoulder. You turn around, desperately burying your face in his chest. He holds you tightly, with his hands on your back, running them up and down in a comforting motion. He feels his own heart breaking at the sound of your crying.

It takes you a long time before you can pull away from his arms, ready to face the reality again. Neteyam asks if you want to go back but you can only shake your head. Not until you know the fate of the Tree of Souls. It was the sacred place where your clan used to go to pray, hidden away in an underwater cave, on the far edge of the island. The Tree was still small, still growing, but it was the only source of light in the darkness. You pray that its secrecy has kept it safe from destruction. 

You pull Neteyam by the hand, leading him towards the cave. The once bright and lively colors of the plants now seem dull. As you dive in, a faint light catches your eyes. The Tree of Souls. Quickly, you swim to it, desperate to feel its warmth and connection to Eywa. But the light the Tree radiates is too weak, barely breaking the darkness around it. You cover your mouth with your hands, in shock. Behind you, Neteyam squeezes your shoulder, as you bring out your queue to the Tree, ready to cling to it. You close your eyes, focusing on your bond, and ask the Great Mother for guidance.

︵‿︵‿︵‿︵

When your eyes flutter open, you find yourself back on the familiar beach. Your village looks just as it did in the past, with all of the maruis standing in place, untouched.

“Y/N?” you hear your sister’s voice, as she appears in front of you with a warm smile. This can’t be real. 

You shake your head in denial, as tears fill up your eyes. With the signs you received from Eywa, deep down you had hoped that she wouldn’t be here. That somehow she had survived and just ran away to live somewhere else. That she hadn’t died for you.

But there she was. Gracing you with the warmest smile and wrapping you in the tightest hug. Wearing the headpiece that you helped her decorate, when she was first pronounced the Tsahik of Ta'unui. It was the happiest day.

“Why are you crying?” she asks, pulling away to look at you.

“I missed you,” you sniff.

“I missed you too,” she cups your face lovingly.

Although your nightmare threatens to repeat itself, you allow her to guide you towards the water without objection. It’s crystal clear and the sky is cloudless. You’re not scared that she may let go of your hand anymore. Together you swim, holding hands, and admiring the depths of the sea. As you both dive deeper, you come across a cluster of yellow plants that glow, breathing in and out.

“I want to lay here someday,” she gestures, and the realization hits you. This is how the water takes, claims the dead.

Heavy-hearted, you get back to the beach with her, stretching out on the sand. You wish you could stay with her. Just the two of you. 

“Are you happy?” she asks you, “It seems like you’re letting the bad thoughts consume you.”

“You know me too well, sister,” you smile, “I don’t know how to start again after losing everything.”

“You just have to accept that you can never bring the past back,” she responds thoughtfully, “What scares you?”

“I’ve met someone… And I’m scared to promise myself to him. I don’t think I can make him happy.”

“Well, why?” she urges you to open up. You can only shake your head, feeling the weight of guilt crushing you. “Is he kind?” she prompts.

“He is, he has the kindest heart.”

“Is he patient?”

“Too much for his own good,” you chuckle.

“Does he love you?”

“He does,” you wince. 

“I don’t see what scares you, Y/N,” she smiles proudly, “You deserve happiness. Leave the past behind you.”

“But what about you?” you frown, feeling like she is slipping away from you.

“I will be the happiest when you are too, tsmuke.”

︵‿︵‿︵‿︵

When you swim back up, you spot Neteyam sitting on the flat rocks, inside the cave. You catch his attention right away.

“Are you alright?” he leans in, helping you out of the water, “You were in there for a long time.”

“I am… the nightmare was a sign from Eywa,” you breathe out, taking a seat by him, “I think there was a burial ceremony the night when I first saw it. The Ta'unui who lived gave their final prayers to the fallen before leaving here.”

“Is she with Eywa now?” he asks carefully, and you nod, “I’m so sorry, Y/N.”

“It’s alright,” you sigh with a small smile, “I’m just happy I saw her.”

Neteyam embraces you tightly. You’re not sure if it’s meant to comfort you or himself but you’re pleased, feeling him so close to you. You tug at his queue lightly, signaling him to pull away.

“What is it?” he asks.

“I want to ask Eywa for a blessing,” you smile at him, nuzzling his face, “I want to be promised to you forever.”

︵‿︵‿︵‿︵

As you make your way back home, you and Neteyam exchange giddy laughs, when he occasionally circles around your ilu, playfully teasing you. This newfound feeling of Neteyam being yours makes you overwhelmed with your love for him. Though you both agreed to wait, you were blessed by the Great Mother and that was all that mattered.

Suddenly, Neteyam stops and puts his fingers to his ear, listening in. Annoyance flickers across his face before he touches his necklace.

“Get away from there, as fast as you can Lo’ak,” he growls, “We’ll be there soon. I don’t care, tell father right now.”

You watch with concern, as Neteyam takes off at lightning speed. You barely manage to keep up with him, urging your ilu to swim faster. 

“It’s Lo’ak,” Neteyam shouts, unwilling to slow down, “He went to warn Payakan about the Tulkun’s death, but Payakan has been marked.”

“Is he okay?” you ask worried.

“He’s trying to get it out. But the skxwang brought everyone with him. Kiri, Tsireya, Ao’nung, and even Tuk followed them,” Neteyam shakes his head in frustration.

You swim faster and faster, when finally, you can spot Payakan, with the silhouettes of your friends, standing on its back. Neteyam takes off and helps them right away but you fall back, when another movement catches your eyes. A large ship is approaching and quickly coming into view.

“”Teyam,” you shout, swimming to them, “They’re here!”

Everyone's heads turn in the direction you point. As the ship gets closer, it seems to grow in size, and your voice catches in your throat. Neteyam quickly takes charge, rushing everyone back to their ilus.

“We’re swimming back now, sir,” he presses on his necklace, “Roger that.”

“Is that your dad? What is he saying?” you ask him.

“They’re getting ready to attack. But we have to leave now.”

︵‿︵‿︵‿︵

“Y/N, help!” you hear Lo’ak’s voice, as you catch a sight of him on the ilu, with Neteyam laid over his knees. 

It seems like just a moment ago, you were helping free Tuk and Tsireya, urging them to retreat to the shore with you, as the Metkayina battled the sky demons. Despite your pleas, Lo'ak picked up a weapon and charged into the explosions. Neteyam shook his head before picking up a weapon himself.

“Neteyam, please,” you pulled him by his hand, “Don’t go there.”

“Don’t worry, just get Tuk to safety,” Neteyam squeezed your hand in his, “I’ll be right behind you, you won’t even notice.”

“But Neteyam -” he shutted you with a kiss, before pulling away with a smile.

“Go, now,” he rushed at you, disappearing into the battle.

You shouldn’t have let him go. Panic and fear overwhelm you, as you try to help Lo’ak and his human friend get Neteyam to the land. Your heart drops when you see red running out of his chest.

"Y/N, he’s been shot!” Lo'ak's voice breaks through your thoughts.

Immediately, you kneel down, Tsireya joining you to examine him. Neteyam barely keeps his eyes open, as you take in a deep wound on his chest, blood gushing out of it. You can’t see the bullet.

“‘Teyam! You’re fine,” you touch his face.

“What do we do?” Lo’ak asks panicked.

“I’m going to get my mom,” Tsireya stands up but Lo’ak pulls her back by her hand.

“Ronal is out there fighting.”

“You’re the tsakarem, you must help him,” you almost hiss at Tsireya. 

Neteyam lets out a weak cough, clearly hurting. You press your fingers onto his wound, trying to apply more pressure. You can feel the warmth of the blood seeping through your fingers, and press down harder, almost trying to force it back. You can’t lose him now. Not right after you found him.

“Hey, hey, stay with me,” you beg him, tears filling up your eyes, “Tsireya, help me.”

Tsireya complies right away, helping you apply pressure down on Neteyam’s chest.

“Go to Tsahik’s room and find the blue balm she keeps by the wall. And bring back as many bandages as you can,” she tells Lo’ak, then turns to you with a whisper, “I don’t want to scare Tuk, but we must get the bullet out.” 

You take a quick look at Tuk, wrapped up in her own arms, crying. You have forgotten she was here with you, watching her big brother suffer in pain. Your heart aches for her. 

“Ma‘Teyam, are you with me?” 

“Y/N,” Neteyam breathes out, a weak smile on his face. His hand cups your cheek, and you immediately cover his with yours, smearing the blood all over you, “I want to go home.”

“You’re not going anywhere without me anymore, you hear that?” you force yourself to smile through your tears.

From the corner of your eye, you notice Lo’ak and his friend returning back, and Tsireya rushes to him to take the supplies. They flee, as she takes a seat by you again, then brings out her knife. She starts speaking to you, as if she wants you to do something but you can’t really hear her. And your mind takes you to a bad place. 

︵‿︵‿︵‿︵

“Y/N,” Tsireya’s voice sounds far away, “I need you to help”

Everything unraveling around you seems to pass in a blur. One moment, you see little Tuk by Neteyam’s unconscious body, with her small hands pressing over his chest. Your eyes take in a knife, covered in blood, with its sharp tip poking through the blood with quick careful motions. Then, Tsireya throws the knife away, as her fingers dig into the wound. Your eyes widen as she pulls out a bullet, covered in thick blood.

“I got it, Y/N,” Tsireya’s voice snaps you back into reality, “But I think he’s doing worse.” 

You only nod and lean in to check Neteyam's breathing, but there's no sign of life. Frantically, you search for his pulse, but again, nothing. When you press your ear to his chest, straining to hear any sound, your heart races. It's like searching for a glimmer of light in the dark depths of the ocean, but at last, you hear the faintest heartbeat.

This weak, fragile beat is all that matters to you. Like a drug, it floods your veins with a surge of adrenaline, tuning out every bad thought and emotion. You quickly spring into action, now overtaking Tuk’s responsibility, as you tear a piece of your cloth to start cleaning his wound. 

“Y/N, his lungs are giving out,” Tsireya voices her concern, as she thoroughly applies a thick scoop of the blue balm to the wound. “If he doesn’t start breathing on his own soon, this is pointless.”

“I know… I know what to do,” you mumble, thinking back on the chest compressions Neteyam performed on Kiri when she was struggling to breathe, “But we need to wrap this very tightly.”

Doubts flood your mind as you begin the compressions, questioning whether you are counting correctly or making the injury worse. Tsireya checks his pulse but shakes her head every time, and you feel a sense of disappointment overwhelming you. You refuse to give up. He just needs a push.

“Neteyam!” you shout, pressing on his chest in an already familiar rhythm, “Don’t leave me!”

Tears stream down your face as you press your mouth to his, willing him to take in more air. Suddenly, you feel a slight movement underneath you, and when you pull away, Neteyam coughs weakly and takes a small breath through his mouth. 

As you notice his chest slowly rising and falling, you let out a cry of happiness, thanking the Great Mother for helping you. You repeat your prayers over and over again, as if in a trance, while holding his hand. Eventually the chaos around you dies down, and everything turns dark.

︵‿︵‿︵‿︵

It takes you a few seconds to adjust your eyes to the bright light. As memories of the previous night appear to you, you jolt up looking for Neteyam, and realize that you had fallen asleep by his side.  

His eyes are closed, face peaceful, bandage tightly wrapping his chest. Your heart picks up a beat, as you carefully lean in to check his breathing. When you feel a weak breeze on your skin, you pull away with relief. Your eyes roam around the big marui, finding the rest of his family scattered around, asleep. Even Tsireya’s here, her head resting on Lo’ak’s shoulder. When your gaze meets Neytiri's, you notice the dark circles under her eyes indicating sleeplessness or tears, or both.

Quietly, she walks over to you and kneels down beside her son, cradling his cheek lovingly. You see her eyes glisten, as she then leans in to wrap you in her motherly embrace. A small sob escapes your lips, feeling consumed by her warmth.

“Shh, my child,” she whispers, gently wiping away your tears, “Neteyam is strong. Eywa has heard you.”

Your heart fills with gratitude for her words. Despite seeing her son like this, she finds enough strength for the both of you. Together you stay by Neteyam’s side, watching his chest rise and fall with each weak breath.

Eventually, the rest of the family wakes up, one by one checking on Neteyam. 

“He will be awake soon,” Ronal confirms her prior reading, earning a grateful look from Jake.

You catch a proud smile settle on her face, as she watches Tsireya carefully switching the old bandages, consumed in her work. You feel infinitely thankful to have Tsireya by your side.

︵‿︵‿︵‿︵

The dynamics between the Sully family changed overnight. You notice how Jake and Neytiri suddenly seem even warmer, holding each other and their kids lovingly, afraid to lose them. Despite guilt eating away at Lo’ak, he feels accepted once embraced by his father. Kiri and Neytiri seem to understand each other without exchanging a word. While you find Tuk clinging herself to you and Tsireya, her newfound admiration for you evident in the way she sought your attention. 

When Neytiri and Jake send the kids off to eat and bring something for them too, you protest to stay at the marui with them. The thought of leaving Neteyam’s side even for a moment makes you shudder.

Instead, as advised by Ronal, you start praying to Eywa again. 

“Y/N, Eywa has heard you already,” Jake says, putting his hand on your shoulder in comfort, “Take a break, kid.”

“But what if she hasn’t? Ronal said he would be awake soon but he isn’t waking up,” your voice is desperate, “I am scared.”

“This is his battle to fight,” Neytiri adds, her voice low, “He is the first son of Toruk Makto, born to lead clans, to protect. Neteyam was destined to be strong, you have to trust him.”

“He’ll be alright,” Jake pats your back, offering comfort. 

You nod, quietly agreeing. There really wasn’t a reason for you to behave like this, with his parents in the room. And they are right. Neteyam always does his best, you just have to be patient. 

“Were you with Neteyam yesterday?” Neytiri suddenly asks, curiously observing your face.

“What?” you’re caught off guard. Is she implying the morning of?

“Yesterday, Neteyam disappeared. And when Lo’ak was with Payakan, he told us that you and Neteyam were coming from the East,” she slowly elaborates, as she pieces the bits together. 

“Why were you coming from the East?” Jakes fixes his eyes on you, waiting for an explanation.

You avoid looking at any of them, hesitant to respond. You knew for sure that if Neteyam hadn't been lying with a wound in his chest right now, Jake would be already scolding him for venturing outside the village perimeters at night. You swallow the lump in your throat, feeling pressured to tell them. Yikes.

“We went back to my village,” you blurt out, “I didn’t want anyone to know where I was going, but Neteyam caught me sneaking out. He couldn’t convince me to stay, so he just came with me to make sure I was safe.”

The two of them listen to you quietly but you can already see disappointment covering Jake’s face. Neytiri’s expression is unreadable, and you wonder if they’re angry at you for putting their son in danger.

“Look, I know it was risky and stupid but I had to see what remained of my home,” your voice breaks, as you continue to justify yourself, “And the two of us were very cautious. Seriously, we were completely fine -”

“It’s alright, kid,” Jake interrupts you, his gaze softening, “Did you find what you were looking for?”

You nod affirmatively, noticing a small spreading across Neytiri's face. She regards you with approval, as if what you told them has impressed her. It's the same look she gave you when you went hunting together.

“You’re not going to get mad at Neteyam, right?” you ask Jake, knowing how upset Neteyam gets when scolded by his father.

“I couldn’t think of anyone braver and kinder than Neteyam to go with you,” Jake smiles, and you feel relieved. 

“Something is different about you. Your spirit,” Neytiri points out.

“I got the answers to my questions from the Great Mother. I feel content,” you nod your head, confirming her words. She hums.

“Y/N, we are very grateful to both you and Tsireya,” Jake’s thanks you sincerely, “You saved my son.”

“Really, like I said, it was mostly her -” you try to oppose but another voice interrupts you.

“Your voice was the thing that kept me alive, Y/N,” it’s so low and husky, weak. Neteyam.

Your heart skips a beat when your eyes catch his golden ones, looking back at you with the already familiar, already addictive warmth. All three of you are suddenly overwhelmed with joy, as you lean in and begin to examine him, holding his face, his hands, his thighs, whatever you can get your hands on.

“You’re awake,” you let out, already feeling tears dwelling in your eyes.

Neytiri beams at her son, squeezing his hand in hers, as if his life depends on it. You give some  space for Jake to sit closer to Neteyam. 

“I am feeling better, don’t worry about me,” Neteyam forces a smile to calm their unsettling reactions.

“Thank you, Great Mother,” Neytiri says, looking up, and you can hear Jake repeating after her quietly.

Neteyam catches your eye, his own crinkling in the corners. But there’s something playful about his expression, like he’s trying to hold back a laugh.

“You scared the hell out of me, Neteyam,” you nag him, and earn back a weak chuckle.

Your blood boils at how angry you suddenly feel. Angry at how careless he was. At how he didn’t listen to you, didn’t trust your instincts. At how now he’s treating his poor parents’ reactions as something funny.

“You think it’s funny?”

“It’s not funny, I’m sorry,” Neteyam shakes his head, as he reaches his hand to you, offering peace, “Mother, father, forgive me please.”

“Glad to see you, son,” Jake pats his head, approvingly.

You can’t remain angry, as you look at his hand outstretched, waiting for yours. Slowly, you move close to him, giving him your hand. He squeezes it with a soft smile. You can’t help but smile back.

“Neteyam!” Tuk’s excited shriek interrupts you, as she runs up to her brother, almost falling onto him.

You laugh at her reaction, as Neteyam struggles to hug her back, and her hands almost choke him around the neck. Lo’ak and Kiri step into the room next, their eyes widening when they see their older brother. Deciding to give them a moment, you step out of the marui with a relieved smile. 

When you take a seat by the wall, you feel somebody sit down next to you. You don’t have to check to know that it’s Jake. 

“You know, I owe you for the rest of my life for saving Neteyam,” he pauses, then tries to joke, “How many of mine have you saved already? Two?”

“Exactly, two,” giddy, you play along by holding up two fingers, “Came really close to three with Lo’ak a few times but then Neteyam took over.”

“Wow. Either you’re really great, or my children just desperately want to give me a heart attack.”

“You should be happy that I hang around them so often,” you earn a throaty laugh from Jake, before his expression turns serious again. 

“But really, Y/N…”

“I know, you don’t have to,” you interrupt him, “I care for your family too. Even if it sounds strange, given my past opinions.”

“Past?” Jake quirks his eyebrow at you, “That trip to your village really turned things around for you, huh?”

“It did,” you nod.

“And I’m guessing that he finally confessed to you?” he catches you off guard with his question.

“Neteyam told you?” you ask. Jake hums, “What did you think?”

“Does it matter?” 

“It does to me.”

“Well,” Jake looks into the distance, “I thought it would be great if you returned his feelings.”

“But why? I wasn’t exactly nice to you,” you’re really confused.  

“You were okay,” he smirks, finding your reaction amusing, “And kind of made a great point about me.”

“I don’t get it,” you chuckle in disbelief, “So you think I was right to put the blame on you?”

“I do,” he nods his head, “You were just the first one to say it to my face. Even I couldn't do that.”

“But I was wrong,” you shake your head, hoping that he’s only teasing you. Nothing about his expressions hints at that, “You know that the demons would invade our islands sooner or later, right? I heard about what happened with Vitraya Ramunong.”

“Yet, I was the one to lure them here,” he adds.

“I don’t understand. You were protecting your family.”

“I know. But it’s not over.”

You pause, confused, examining his face. Jake looks almost defeated, like he has accepted it, and has been living with it for a long time. You feel your stomach turn, as you recognize the nagging feeling of guilt. Feeling of being at fault. Like you didn’t deserve this life, while others suffered for you. 

“You think they will come back for you?” you ask quietly, dreading his answer. 

“I know they will,” he meets your eyes, his eyebrows tied inwards, “But I won’t let them hurt anybody else again.”

“What are you going to do?”

Jake doesn’t answer, instead staring off into the distance, deep in his thoughts. You think you know the answer already, everything alludes to your first conversation with him. But you don’t want to say it. Don’t really want to think about it either. 

“Y/N, can you come in?” Neytiri interrupts your moment, as she leans against the entrance, “Neteyam wants to see you.” 

“Sure,” you stand up. You exchange a knowing look with Jake, and try to push the bad thoughts away before walking in. 

As Neytiri rushes her children out of the marui to give you some space, you catch a hushed exchange between Lo’ak and Kiri.

“You’re delusional, Lo’ak.”

“They came for us together, you idiot.”

Neteyam lies in a sit-up position, his back leaning against the wall. He smiles, as you sit next to him, his hand immediately taking yours.

“Missed me?” you tease him. Neteyam rolls his eyes before his lips stretch into a smile.

“Of course I did.”

He pulls you gently towards him, bringing his other hand to your face. You stop breathing in anticipation for his lips to touch yours. Instead, he nuzzles your cheek with his nose. 

“What if your family sees?” you whisper, closing your eyes.

“Let them.” 

You pull away to read his face. He looks tired but his eyes are brighter than ever. A playful smile sneaks onto his face, before he speaks.

“They must know by now anyway. Tuk likes to blabber.”

“Oh, right,” you recall the kiss he gave you on the ship. Both Tsireya and Tuk saw you. 

You lean in again, cupping his cheek. Your thumb slowly traces the dark blue stripe on his cheekbone, disappearing into his braids. Neteyam closes his eyes under your touch, and it makes your heart flutter. You kiss him softly, gently. Afraid that if you press your lips against his any harder, he will break into pieces. It doesn’t take long for him to reciprocate, his arms sneaking around your waist and pulling you closer. 

Smitten by the taste of his lips, you feel the urge to hold him. You rest your palms on his chest, feeling the bandage touch your skin, and before you can’t register, you involuntarily press against him. Neteyam moans into your lips with a mix of pain and pleasure. Immediately, you pull away, examining the damage. He looks fine.

“I’m sorry,” you breathe out.

“It’s alright, come here,” he opens his arm, encouraging you to sit by his side.

Carefully you nuzzle against his side, his arm draping over your shoulder. The tiredness from your sleepless night and the lack of food, makes you a little dizzy, and as you close your eyes, you eventually doze off. 

︵‿︵‿︵‿︵

You shift slightly in your position, hearing hushed whispers next to you. You recognize Jake and Neteyam but it takes you some time to start making out their words. You don’t open your eyes, pretending to be asleep.

“Lo’ak said we won?”

“Yeah, kind of,” Jake’s voice is hesitant.

“So, that man is dead?”

“He is.”

There is a small pause before Jake speaks.

“I’m very proud of you, son.”

“Thank you, dad,” Neteyam’s tone is shy.

“And I think you chose very well,” you can’t see it but you can feel Jake’s eyes pointing at you. Neteyam shakes slightly underneath you, letting out a low chuckle.

“I know, Eywa blessed us.”

“Eywa?” Jake asks, “Oh, that’s good. That’s good.”

Another pause.

“Son, I knew that I would have to talk to you about this one day, yet I am caught off guard,” Jake admits, a hint of fear evident in his voice. You wonder where he's taking this. Maybe you should pretend to wake up to give them privacy?

“Why?”

“Well…” Jake breathes out loudly, “You know that even after getting Eywa’s blessing, you two can still take your time. I mean, there are other things you can do to… give each other pleasure.”

“Dad, please don’t -” you can feel the blood rushing to Neteyam’s face in embarrassment. You hold yourself back from cringing.

“I’m just saying. You don’t have to feel pressured to mate right away. Having kids this young can be too much,” Jake lowers his voice, “I want you to know about the -”

“I know, I know, dad, please stop explaining,” Neteyam pleads, as you silently pray for this conversation to end. 

“Are you sure?”

“Yes, the guys talk. Like a lot,” Neteyam’s tone turns even more embarrassed, as he admits.

“Alright then,” you hear Jake stand up, “I guess this went better than I imagined.”

“You mean it was supposed to be worse?” Neteyam mumbles underneath his breath. You try your best to force down the giggle forming in your chest.

︵‿︵‿︵‿︵

As you look down on the water, soaring high in the sky, you feel heavy-hearted. You hold tighter to Neteyam, looking around at the rest of the Sully’s, each on their ikrans, maintaining similar speed. Your eyes intuitively search for Lo’ak, feeling the most saddened for him to part ways with Tsireya and his soul-brother, Payakan. Even if temporarily.

“Don’t worry, Lo’ak, we will be back until they even get to miss you,” Jake raises his voice for him to hear. Lo’ak doesn’t react.

“Come on, brother, you know she’ll wait for you,” Kiri adds, her voice filled with empathy. 

Sully's human friend, Spider, is seated behind Kiri, his small hands tight around her middle. You haven’t particularly taken a liking to him but Neteyam says he is a good friend. Besides, he will play a big role in Jake’s plan.

It wasn’t hard to guess what the plan exactly was. From the second you had your conversation with Jake, you knew that whatever he had been planning in the past few months was now a definite decision in his head. Unlike the rest of his family, you were prepared for the day when  he announced that he and his family were leaving the Metkayina clan for the time being. And if the possibility presents, and the Sully’s can return safely, without endangering the clan, then Jake hopes to be welcomed back and stay permanently. Kindly, Tonowari agreed, wishing Eywa to accompany the Great Toruk Makto in his pursuit.

There wasn’t much arguing from his family, when they first found out. Of course, they were upset to leave yet another home behind, but they trusted this to be the best solution. Even Lo’ak, who was the most heartbroken by this, eventually gave up on protesting. Wherever the family goes, he has to follow.

Their human friend had a tracker in his mask. And knowing that he now joined the Sully’s, Jake guessed that it wouldn’t be long until he gets attacked again. So his plan was to make a demonstrative exit, flying away from the water, over the uninhabited, wild jungles of Pandora, until somewhere along the way, he would remove and drop the tracker. You would continue your journey, until completely hidden from the sky people, and live for a little while by yourselves. No communications with the human-friends from the labs. No interactions with other clans. Just the family. And, if everything goes according to plan, Jake hopes to return back to Metkayina, where his children felt accepted. 

“Just think about it, brother. By the time we return, you will be a man. Even the Olo'eyktan will see you in a different light,” Neteyam turns his face to Lo’ak, “You will make no effort to make Tsireya choose you again.”

Despite the words of encouragement, you feel the heaviness hanging over Lo’ak. It must be hard to be patient, leaving behind not only a soul brother you found but also a girl you love.

Despite the words of encouragement, the heaviness of the moment is palpable. You can feel the sadness emanating from everyone, as they all look back on the water, flying on the backs of your ikrans.

Seated behind Neteyam, you hold onto his middle tighter, reminding yourself of how lucky you were to be taken with him. You nuzzle your face into his back, seeking comfort. Neteyam stretches his arm, patting you on the thigh. 

"I see you," he says, loud enough for only you to hear. A rush of warmth spreads through your body, knowing that he truly does see you.

︵‿︵‿︵‿︵

part 1

wow, can’t believe this is it. also, can’t comprehend how other writers do this, it was a journey… i hope you enjoyed reading this, and please don’t forget to reblog and leave some comments <3

︵‿︵‿︵‿︵

Water whipped around your ankles as you ran after him. Taking Neteyam’s hand in yours, you spun him around and tugged on his arm repeatedly.

“Do we have to tell them? Why can’t they…Just figure it out on their own?.” You felt like child now, complaining over something so simple, but that’s how being with Neteyam made you feel; all fuzzy and floaty on the inside. Things were simple and easy when you were with him.

He finally stopped waking and took his arm out of your hand, replacing it with his hand.

“I understand if you are nervous, they can be,” he paused as if to take a moment to find the words. “intimidating when they want to be.” It came out as a laugh.

You snorted, “Your mother in particular.”

“She loves you!”

“She likes me as your friend, she might not as a mate!”

Neteyam sighed and pulled you closer; he could tell this was really bothering you.

“It’s not like there has been some, huge, drastic change. We’re still us, just…A more together version of us.”

A reluctant smile bloomed on your lips. “You sound stupid.”

“Ah.” You giggled as he pushed you away in mock offence.

“I take back what I said, you should be terrified.”

“Neteyam!”

-

Eclipse had come and the Sully family were gathered in their Marui, happily feasting on their dinner.

All that could be heard was the crackling of the fire and chewing of food, until Lo’ak took it upon himself to break that silence.

“So, big bro, what happened with yn today?”

Suddenly, all eyes were on the eldest Sully. A small smirk jumped onto Kiri’s lips and she quickly went to cover it with her hand and Tuk looked genuinely worried for your health. Lo’ak had a shit eating grin on his face; he knew what he was doing.

Neteyam gulped, disguising it was swallowing a mouthful of his dinner. “What do you mean?”

“Well, I saw you two getting awfully close in the water today.” Neytiri looked as if she had finally checked into the conversation, putting down her meal and looking to her sons.

“I just thought maybe, she might have been hurt?”

Like a hunter watches their prey, his family set their gaze on him, silently hungering for more information.

In an effort to appear cool headed, Neteyam shrugged. “She was fine, not hurt.” He looke duo to his brother and shot him a look, “Why do you ask?”

“Oh no, just curious.” It looked like Lo’ak would leave it now and Neteyam internally sighed in relief.

“How is yn, Neteyam? Haven’t seen her in a while.” Jake asked. Oh well, the questioning wasn’t over.

-

“I think they are onto us.”

You let those words sit in the air they were spoken into.

Neteyam’s arm tightened around you and you turned more into his chest. The pool of water around you wrinkled gently with your movements.

The two of you had stashed yourselves away in a lone terrace, not unlike the ones that bordered the lagoon outside the village, but this one was a secret place for you both. Where you could be with each other without worrying about prying eyes or annoying brothers.

Finally, you answered him, “What makes you say that?”

Neteyam sat up more, causing you to be partially shoved off of him.

“Lo’ak started asking me these annoying questions while we were eating dinner last night!” He looked like he was a getting really upset; brows furrowed, arms waving wildly, voice raising.

You frowned and caught one of his flailing hands. “What kind of questions?”

“Just stupid ones! Like, why we are spending so much time together and why we were getting so close to each other yesterday in the wate-”

“Be calm, Neteyam. Slow down.” You brought his hand to your chest. “Breath, deep breaths.”

Neteyam stopped his ranting and sighed out a long breath. As best as he could, he copied your breathing.

“Now, explain to me why this bothers you so much?”

He is still for a moment, looking a little embarrassed. “He’s putting his nose where it doesn’t belong, it is just not his business.”

You snort at that, “Are we not about to announce our relationship to your family? Honestly, it’s not a surprise that one of them found out before.”

Neteyam sighed again. He turned to face you and gently took your face into his hands, looking between your eyes.

“I want it to be on our terms, not because of Lo’ak’s prying.”

“I understand that,” you hummed. Your hand covered one of Neteyam’s on your face and you leaned into it. “Sounds like we need to act on our plans a little faster.”

A kiss was planted on your forehead and you smiled giddily.

“I don’t want to push you, I know you are a bit nervous.” He mumbled into your hairline.

Your free hand found his face and brought him back to where you could look him in the eyes. Your thumb glided back and forth along his cheekbone and his eyes drifted closed.

“I’m a big girl, I can handle it.”

-

It really felt like you could not handle it.

The sun was high in the sky, beating down onto your skin. On a day like this, you would usually be bobbing up and down in the waves, happily soaking up the rays, but on this occasion all it was doing to you was elevating your already rapidly growing panic.

You and Neteyam sat on the woven walkways not to far from his marui. Today was the day where you would finally announce your relationship to his family. A monumental occasion really; the eldest son of Toruk Makto and former leader of the Omatikaya, had found himself a partner, a mate, that he wanted to spend the rest of his life with.

You had met the Sully family many times before, you regularly spent time with Lo’ak and Kiri, even spending time with little Tuk. But now, you were seeing them on such different circumstances, they might as well have been strangers.

“What’s the worst that could happen?” Neteyam had offered, an effort to quell your growing nerves, unfortunately this just spurred into motion all the thoughts of things that could happen; ranging from awkward silences to Jake and Neytiri chasing you out of their marui for trying to take their firstborn away from them. Extremely unlikely and just downright stupid, but you were just grasping at straws for anything that could go wrong.

“Why can’t- why can’t you just tell them while I am far, far away?” Neteyam laughed heartily at that but you were deadly serious.

“Oh yes, I can see it now,” Neteyam gasped between giggles, “hey mom, hey dad, you know yn? yeah I want her to be my mate. Where is she? Anywhere you aren’t.” His laughed picked up at his own joke and you groaned, hitting his chest with your balled fist.

“I love your family, Neteyam. I really, really want this to go well!”

“And it will! We’ve had this same conversation over and over, i don’t know how else I can reassure you.” He reached his arm around your waist and dragged you closer to him. “Would you like me to tell you in english? I know a little.”

Neteyam said something you didn’t understand. The language sounded so silly you couldn’t help but cover your mouth to hide your giggles.

“Should we get going? They should all be home now.”

“Yeah, let’s go.”

-

“Neteya- oh, and yn?” Jake paused. “How are you, yn?”

The Sully clan, excluding Neteyam, were all seated around the cooking fire inside the marui. Neteyam and Neytiri parked up close to each other: Jake prepping fish for cooking and Neytiri wrapped then placed it above the fire in front of them.

Kiri and Tuk sat next to their mother. The older girl attempted to teach the youngest how to repair a torn Ilu saddle.

Lo’ak lay next to his father, apparently completely uninterested in whatever was happening around him, until the two of you entered together, after which he sat up looking infinitely intrigued.

Tucking your arms behind your back, you squeezed your hands together and mustered up a smile.

“I am well, thank you for asking.”

Jake continued to de-bone the creature he was holding before speaking to you again, “To what do we owe this pleasure?”

You glanced to Neteyam, the nervousness you had buried starting to resurface again. He took a deep breath and reached behind you, taking your hand tightly in his.

Neytiri, who hadn’t looked entirely phased by your presence, suddenly perked up. Her eyes fell onto your intertwined fingers and then back to your face. It felt as if your heart was beating a mile a minute.

“Actually, sir, there’s…something I want to tell you.” Neteyam’s voice had an uncharacteristic nervousness to it and you could feel the smallest shake in the hand that held yours.

The whole family froze, each with sightly different looks on their faces. Lo’ak looked like he was on the verge of hysterical laughter, Kiri had her own little smile while Tuk was ready to hang off of your every word.

“What is it, Neteyam?” Neytiri asked. She stood and Jake followed suit.

The grip on your hand tightened before Neteyam spoke, “Yn and I, we wish to be mated before Eywa.”

As soon as the words left his mouth, the family before you reacted. Lo’ak, who had been munching on his dinner, suddenly started to choke and thumped his fist against his chest in attempts to dislodge the obstruction.

Tuk and Kiri had the same reaction, shouting “What?!” at the same time. Tuk visibly more excited about the news, while Kiri looked like this was the stupidest thing she had ever heard.

“My son, you are not yet a man.” Neytiri urged, slowly pacing towards her eldest.

“I have passed two of the three rites of passage of our clan! And now that we live amongst the reef people, I can complete the three by passing one of theirs!” The two of you had anticipated these concerns and had done your research on the matter. Since the Sully’s no longer lived among their own, the three tasks Neteyam had to complete to be welcomed into the Omaticaya as a man were no longer possible. It seemed only fitting that he finish of these tasks by overcoming the Metkayina’s last rite of passage that their men had to accomplish.

“Mating with someone is a serious thing, son.” Jake was now face to face with Neteyam. He had a stony look on his face. “I know you’re friends with yn, evidently a bit more than that, but this will be the person you spend the rest of your life with.”

Coming up beside her son, Neytiri put a hand on his shoulder. “Your father is right, Neteyam. These decisions cannot be rushed.”

By Eywa, you wished the ground would just swallow you whole.

Neteyam noticed your embarrassment and doubled down. “I know that, we know that! We have been talking about this for a long time and we’ve thought of everything.”

His father narrowed his eyes, he still didn’t look convinced, so you decided oh well, you already ready feel like you were in over your head, what’s a little more?

“If I may,” All eyes turned to you, “your son is the most caring, most passionate, and most mature man I have ever had the pleasure of knowing. He is infinitely understanding and loves with all he has. I cannot speak on his behalf, but I trust in the decision I have made to have Neteyam as my mate.”

Silence filled the space, broken up by the soft sound of crashing waves and the chittering of stray Ilu.

Neytiri spoke first.

“This truly what you want, my son?” The mother laced her hands with the sons free one.

“More than anything I have ever wanted in my entire life.”

A look was shared between Jake and Neytiri and their children stared on.

“Neteyam,” Jake sighed, “I give you my blessing to pursue your remaining rites of passage by the Metkayina.” His hand reached up and latched onto the back of Neteyam’s head, bringing it closer to his own.

“My son, I see you.”

Your partner’s lip quivers and his brows told upward, it is clear he is using everything in him not to cry.

“And you, yn.” Jake turned to you, bringing his hand up to his brow and then back down again. “I see you.”

You repeated his gesture and sniffed, emotions running very high. “I see you, Toruk Makto.”

Jake smiled. “No need for the formalities, not now that we’re family.”

The rest of that night was filled with light and laughter. With songs and delicious food. You couldn’t think of a better way to be welcomed into this beautiful family.

Your heart had never felt so full.