fuck it

“Just because I left doesn’t mean that you aren’t worth something,” it wasn’t really an answer to the question. Dylan wasn’t a liar in terms of how she saw things or felt them. She hadn’t left for any specific reason, sometimes she just felt like her time was up and had to find somewhere new to be. “You are worth something. You are beautiful and interesting and so fucking hot, Nev. That’s why I want to get a drink with you. We’re both here and I just feel like we should make the most of it.” Dylan was selfish in that way, she would think she was being kind when she was actually making things worse.

She hesitated although not because she had nothing to say. Dylan could make something out of nothing, talk for hours if invited to do so. “Right, so you’re super pissed with me,” she ran her tongue over her bottom lip as she stood there. She probably should have felt ashamed of herself or at least regretful but in all honesty, she’d do it all again. As if she was thinking about something deep to say, the cogs in her brain working, she took a long pause and let out a small sigh. “Just wondering, you know, for science,” she paused, “Is this whole mad thing going to last til like the end of the day or the week or be more like a life long grudge thing? Just so I know when we can get a drink.”

She didn’t take it personally. It was hard for her to take anything personally because she always had invisible walls up, even when she was open, she was shut down. “You didn’t have to worry about me. See, I’m fine,” she breezed as if it would suddenly change the direction of the conversation. She didn’t apologise, it was one of her fatal flaws along with stubbornness. “Come on, it’s been fucking forever. You can’t still be upset with me. We should go out, get a drink, laugh about the old times.”

Nevaeh looked at the other and nodded her head. “I heard that a little bit of drama went down. I think the blonde chick and one of the birthday boys had a little bit of drama with one another earlier,” the dark-haired girl began. “I think his cake got ruined and then he was sick on her? I didn’t get the full details. I was here and still missed out on all the fucking fun,” she scoffed.

She looked at Nevaeh and ignored the stuttering. Dylan wasn’t cold hearted but she often found herself lacking in the empathy department. She left people suddenly and without reason, the dark pit in her unquenchable it seemed. “Going to school, what are you doing here?” she asks with a tinge of entertainment presuming she knew the answer was the same. “Are you going to stand there or give me a nice to see you hug, Nev?” It was as if nothing had even happened for her.

After her morning run, a series of events that she repeated each day to get her prepared for whatever came next, it seemed inevitable she’d bump into one of her classmates. Running up the stairs to the floor they were staying on, she tugged her headphones off. The person in front of her familiar although it takes her a few seconds to allow her brain to catch up with what was going on. No awkwardness or remorse on her end, “Oh, Nev,” her gaze trailed, “Looking good. Long time no see.”

if there’s one thing auggie was it was confident. so he winked in her direction about to respond when she spoke again. “ well now i think you’re just trying to hurt my feelings. ” he pouted playfully. arms crossing as he shot her a look. “ what are you into her or something ? or are you always this complimentary ? ” 

Nevaeh liked the idea of celebrating valentine’s day with friends and other students but thought the rules were whack. Some people who did like each other a lot couldn’t even go together because of the whole one person, one date rule. “ I didn’t do anything for it, i’m not seeing anyone, or don’t have the hots for anyone right now,” Nevaeh answered the blonde as a small laugh escaped through her parted lips. “Why did you? Did anyone get you something nice?”

Nevaeh hadn’t bothered with the mandatory kiss. She wasn’t interested in kissing any of the guys being celebrated, and wasn’t going to kiss another guy for the sake of it. The only time she had kissed a guy was during New Years Eve and that was only because it was a dare.  “Maybe not, but I was too nervous to ask anyone,” she confessed. “I’m confident, but not enough to have my ego knocked down,”.

nevaeh smiled at manon, knowing it had been a while since the two of them last spoke to one another. “ it’s been okay, yeah ... i love music and drinking , the whole bring a date thing , or kiss one of them people being celebrated was a little uncomfortable , but thankfully i haven’t had to do either at the moment , so that’s always a positive,” she chuckled. “ what flavour is it ? i don’t think i have , i’ve been boring and on lemonade so far..”

“I only flirt with the hot girls, ” nevaeh answered as a smirk spread across her lips. nevaeh didn’t flirt with every girl she came into contact with , and only flirted with some of the girls if she knew the other weren’t going to get upset with her about it. nevaeh continued to dance to the music raising her eyebrows suggestively. “ don’t tease me Lu , we’re sharing a room remember,” she teased back, continuing to move in time to the music. “ don’t make me become a simp for you or whatever,”.

“ i was hoping they were cool with it , I think everyone seems to occupied to actually care, ” she giggled. Nevaeh liked listening to music and having a dance so this event was totally up her alley, besides the bringing a date part. She was a little shy sometimes, afraid of rejection.  “ i don’t know , a lot of the girls are seeing someone and i don’t want to assume they’d go with me,” she shrugged. “i’d want to be confident someone would say yes because they like me , and not out of pity,”.

“I mean I can’t change some traits about me ,” she answers the dark-haired femme back, lips curling into a small smirk as the words escaped her mouth. Nevaeh liked the idea of turning up with someone, but dating wasn’t something she was looking for. She simply liked the idea of being close enough to someone to ask them to go with her. “What wouldn’t you look good in? I seem you suiting a range of colours,” Nev answered, feeling the other take her hand. Nevaeh pulled the two of them towards where the dance floor was and giggled. “I wouldn’t beg for no-one,” she confirmed, smirk spreading across her lips. “Not my style at all.”

“ i hear rumours about everyone one all the time, sometimes they are true, and sometimes they are far off, ” she chuckled. she went a little shy as the blonde asked who she had turned up with . “ no-one , ” she answered. “ i was too shy to ask any of the girls, and wasn’t interesting in any of the guys, ”. Nevaeh would have came with Lawson if Beau hadn’t go there first. He was her best friend. “ I haven’t been thrown out so far, so far i’m doing so good,”.

“ that’s good , i’m glad things have been to crazy for you, ” she chuckled. Nevaeh didn’t really talk shit about people who she didn’t know , she had simply heard rumours about the whole ordeal that went down between the texts shared between the two of them. “ i’ve been good,” she answered back, smiling at the femme opposite her. “ been travelling around london , it’s nice being in a country where I don’t have to learn the language,” she giggled.

Nevaeh didn’t know what was wrong with her one minute she was having a good time and listening to the music, and the next minute she was watching all these couples and friends hang out and felt a little lonely. It wasn’t as if Nevaeh didn’t have friends at interchange, but she felt like a little bit of an outsider. Her eyes welled up as she got a little emotional about it all, before quickly rubbing her eyes as she saw someone approaching. “Enjoying your night so far?” She asked, trying to make casual conversation with someone so she wasn’t sitting alone all night.

Nevaeh walked over towards Bluebell was beverage’s in her hand. “Hey! ,” she called out to the femme near her. “Do you fancy another drink? I got given two and I’m a lightweight, so it might be easier for me to pass one on,” she giggled. The brunette sipped on the red wine that she had been given and held out the other. “I promise I haven’t spiked it or anything,”.