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𝖙𝖍𝖊 𝖋𝖆𝖉𝖊 𝖜𝖆𝖘 𝖎𝖓𝖙𝖔𝖑𝖊𝖗𝖆𝖓𝖙 𝖔𝖋 deceit. souls and spirits were stripped clean. emmrich needn't help to parse illario's mien. and when did this happen, they thought, when did we become this? illario misunderstood. he called to them. he called, and emmrich came without hesitation. i crossed the dreaming sea to find you.

"... you have that effect," emmrich's smile was a tender thing, "i trust you not to hold it against me?"

illario would do just so unburdened of shame. they would feign scandal for the private delight of watching him up the ante. scripts were read, directions were committed to heart. front of house, curtain call—encore, encore! their ritual was an unexpected comfort.

Yet in Emmrich’s voice he could only find what he had always found there, willing but unassuming, the patience of a hand stretched out to a wild thing, unwilling to grab or take what was not offered. More than that, there was a selflessness to them that seemed irrational, one that he had always imagined to be a lie, but had accomplished as a liar as he was, he could not find it. 

His hand brushed again up the length of Emmrich’s neck, his expression more thoughtful than smoldering. Tracing over the simple golden hoop in his ear, rubbing it softly between thumb and index, caught curiously by its bent shape. His chin tilted up then, meeting Emmrich’s eye, the practiced seduction back in his eyes, yet his touch remained gentle.

Indie. Semi selective. Medium/high activity. Cyberpunk 2077 OC RP blog multi-para, multi-ship, multi-verse! Crossover and multimuse friendly! Familiarity with Cyberpunk not required.

When I think of you My head splits in two I think I love him more than you I reach out so hard but what can I do? I think I love him more than you

feel free to change pronouns / wording

Yo we need to go to Copenhagen and fuck that place up

What time are you home tonight, should I save 'Bachelorette'?

I'm a hard worker. I'm a nice guy. I've got a great vibe.

Just shut the fuck up, narc

Look I don't deal deal like that. Like, I distribute just little bits here and there when I'm holding, you know.

I should call the police on you.

No. We're done. We're done with this bullshit, okay?

You're such a soft, shitty bitch.

Will you fight with me tomorrow?

You wanna be a baby for another minute or are you tryin' to party?

You guys were at a bar at 6:45 in the morning?

Bro, I'm not homeless.

Okay, good. So you're a psychopath. Cool.

You good? You okay?

Feels weird out there.

You see who shot up my window?

Man, don't call the cops.

Should we... call the cops?

Keep not processing trauma, ___. Just keep working like nothing ever happened.

Is there a name for that thing where you're afraid of something good happening 'cause you think something bad's gonna happen?

I just want things to be on solid ground. I want things to feel consistent.

I guess all the time I feel like I'm kind of trapped because I can't describe how I'm feeling.

Yo, can you shut the FUCK up for a second?

Okay, you need to go home and cool off.

I don't need this right now. I cannot fucking emphasize how much I don't need this shit right now.

Quit? And where are you gonna go, ___? Where you gonna go?

Hey, do I wanna know what happened out there?

What's your angle? Level with me.

You don't have to curse at me like a maniac.

It's your bullshit that fucked us today, not mine.

You don't need to be screaming and shit, that's not you.

There's something broken in you. You're being mean, and it's ugly.

Why are you being such a bitch right now?

Are you gonna fucking stab me?

We are not good.

What the fuck are you talking about? What's going on?

I quit. That's what's going on.

This isn't on me. Good luck.

No letter. No goodbye. Nothing.

I didn't have a lot of friends growing up.

The more people I cut out, the quieter my life got.

What happens if you get stabbed in the asshole? You can't sew an asshole.

I feel kind of bad because I haven't really, like, asked you how you're doing with everything.

I could do a regime change if I really felt like it.

I had a chef that would only let me zest. I worked at the place for, like, eight months and all I did was zest.

Wow. This is really, really good.

You're not as annoying as usual.

We didn't really eat out growing up. So when we did it felt special, even if it wasn't.

I should have fucking handcuffed that motherfucker to the desk.

You knew he was using?

I should have done more.

What happens if he doesn't wake up?

You got lucky. You'll get charged with aggravated assault.

You're welcome, dickhead.

Where'd you get the money for bail?

You're all I got.

What the fuck is this?

A souvenir for your troubles.

Of course I feel sad. But I don't talk about it, I keep it inside. It helps me kill people.

Seriously, though, if you ever try that shit again I'll fuck your ass up.

My behavior was not okay.

Oh, shut up you old bitch.

You got stabbed and just walked it off, that's pretty tough.

dialogue prompts from nevada: a novel by imogen binnie.

there's kind of an art to faking it.

it just sucks having to educate people.

it's not glamorous or mysterious. it's boring.

maybe i need to leave.

you're not even making a face.

mopey old lonely me.

you're so weird.

i know you, but it still freaks me out, the way you deal with things.

it would be nice if i felt like you cared at all.

who doesn't feel weird?

i'm vegan-ish.

i always sympathize with the monsters.

i think i just don't get sex.

come smoke a cigarette with me?

when i'm comfortable, i get quiet.

i felt liberated, for a second.

do you want to get a beer?

do other people feel like this all the time?

who can remember exact quotes?

straight men are so, so weird.

what would courtney love do here?

i can't think of anything to do with my hands.

are you even here now?

there's a lot going on in my head. i can't process all this at once.

i'm sorry i lied, but i really don't know what to do.

is this salvageable, do you think?

i think i'm only happy when i'm alone.

it's so easy just to check out and leave your body.

i'm living something that isn't even a life.

this is way too meta.

i don't want to be drunk, but i do want to be drinking.

you look as terrified as i feel.

i don't like to be far from home.

i talk too much, right?

you are not the only one with problems.

it's pretty much you and me against the entire world.

don't be responsible instead of being yourself.

i spend a lot of time reading instead of working.

forgive me for saying so, but you're beautiful.

i'm too old for emotional catharsis.

you don't work here anymore.

sometimes your internal monologue surprises you.

you lose perspective when you disappear into a relationship.

i swear to god, your life is going to get so much better than you can imagine right now.

how do i know you're not a cop?

i'd rather fight than seethe forever.

you look like you're either a rockstar or a murderer.

sorry. i guess i haven't really talked to anybody in a while.

there is no center at the center of things.

this coffee is depressing.

i wish i'd had someone to talk to at your age.

i don't remember much, but i must have checked out of my life.

it's really hard to just up and end a behavior pattern.

once you're straight edge, you might as well go vegan.

i'm a fucking idiot. that's who i am.

i've been the weird kid my whole life.

what happens if you sprinkle heroin on a bowl of weed?

i want you to tell me who you are. your turn.

do you want some downers, instead?

i haven't smoked since before breakfast.

i don't really understand what you just said.

i'd better be sober for this.

you're good at being a stoner, let's be real. maybe the best.

stop feeling responsible for everybody all the time.

❝  don’t be ridiculous,  there’s enough room on this bed for both of us. ❞ 

❝  please stay.  i don’t think i can be alone tonight.  ❞

❝  i’m staying,  okay?  you don’t have to be alone tonight. ❞

❝  you shouldn’t be alone right now.  i’ll take the couch,  it’ll be fine.  ❞

❝  will you sleep with me?  i know how that sounds i just mean—  i feel safe when you’re there.  ❞

❝  i’ll be here the whole night okay?  nothing will get to you while i’m here.  ❞

❝  wait— have you been here all night?  ❞

❝  i thought you went home after i went to bed.  you didn’t have to do that— you could’ve at least joined me in bed that couch is shit for sleeping on.  ❞

❝  can i stay with you tonight?  i don’t wanna go home yet.  ❞

❝  it’s late,  you might as well just stay here.  ❞

❝  can you just…stay here?  and hold me.  ❞

❝  i know this might sound weird but,  do you wanna stay over?  i guess ‘sleepover’ sounds kind of childish but.  i think it’d be nice.  ❞

❝  i’m not expecting anything,  i just,  thought it’d be nice to keep you company tonight. ❞

❝  i don’t have nightmares when you’re there.  ❞

❝  i get you’re doing the whole protective thing— and i appreciate it.  i do,  but there’s no reason for you to stay awake all night.  might as well come to bed.  ❞

❝  thank you for staying.  it just gets so lonely at night sometimes.  ❞

❝  i don’t want you to be alone tonight and honestly,  i don’t really wanna be alone either.  ❞

❝  do you wanna stay with me tonight?  ❞

❝  stay,  please.  ❞

❝  i’ll stay.  ❞

❝  i’m staying.  ❞

❝  i’m staying.  end of discussion.  you gotta learn to let people take care of you.  ❞

❝  i’m not ready to say goodbye yet.  ❞

❝  i don’t wanna have to say goodnight.  ❞

❝  honestly i can’t sleep,  so if you wanna stay up with me?  ❞

❝  i don’t sleep a lot either these days.  we can be insomniacs together.  ❞

❝  well,  i can think of some ways to wear you out.  ❞

❝  if you can’t sleep,  there are other things we could do.  ❞

❝  i’d rather fuck than stare at the ceiling counting sheep to be honest.  ❞

❝  it doesn’t have to mean anything,  i just don’t wanna feel lonely tonight.  and i want to feel good for once.  ❞

❝  please don’t go—  i need.  i need someone—  i need you.  ❞

❝  the night doesn’t have to end here,  you know.  ❞

❝  i like it when you’re here.  so stay.  please?  ❞

❝  you’re just as lonely as i am.  might as well be lonely together.  ❞

❝  you can stay but i’m not letting you sleep on that couch.  ❞

❝  chivalry is overrated,  get in my bed.  ❞

❝  you’re clearly exhausted.  you can go in the morning.  ❞

❝  you don’t have to pretend to be fine,  if you need me to stay i will.  ❞

❝  when i said i wanted everyone to leave me alone i didn’t mean you.  i can’t handle everyone else right now but you…you’re different.  ❞

❝  you need someone right now.  and i’m the one that’s here.  let me be what you need.  ❞

SCENARIOS

[ GUARDED ]  sender insists on staying the night to keep watch over receiver who has been in some kind of danger. 

[ GUARDING ]  receiver insists on staying the night to keep watch over sender who has been in some kind of danger. 

[ UNEXPECTED ]  one muse stays the night to keep an eye on the other after something traumatic and they end up having comfort sex.

[ CONSOLE ]  sender asks receiver to stay the night because they don’t want to be alone and they end up cuddling.  

[ CONSOLED ]  receiver asks sender to stay the night because they don’t want to be alone and they end up cuddling. 

[ ACCIDENT ]  sender winds up staying at receiver’s house all night because receiver fell asleep against them/in their lap and they didn’t have the heart to wake them. 

[ UNPLANNED ]  receiver winds up staying at sender’s house all night because sender fell asleep against them/in their lap and they didn’t have the heart to wake them. 

[ STAY ]  sender is carrying receiver to bed because they fell asleep somewhere else but when they start to walk away,  receiver grabs their hand so sender joins them in bed. 

[ STAYING ]  receiver is carrying sender to bed because they fell asleep somewhere else but when they start to walk away,  sender grabs their hand so receiver joins them in bed. 

[ APPROACHED ]  sender is staying with receiver for safety and asks if they can sleep in their bed with them. 

[ APPROACH ]  receiver is staying with sender for safety and asks if they can sleep in their bed with them. 

[ SHARE ]  sender is unexpectedly staying with receiver overnight,  receiver insisted sender sleep on the bed while they take the floor but sender winds up insisting they join them in bed. 

[ SHARED ]  receiver is unexpectedly staying with sender overnight,  sender insisted receiver sleep on the bed while they take the floor but receiver winds up insisting they join them in bed. 

[ FOUND ]  sender is staying with receiver who had them take the bed while receiver takes the couch.  in the middle of the night,  sender goes out to join receiver on the couch because they don’t want to sleep alone. 

[ FIND ]  receiver is staying with sender who had them take the bed while sender takes the couch.  in the middle of the night,  receiver goes out to join sender on the couch because they don’t want to sleep alone. 

[ DISCOVERED ]  receiver wakes up in the morning to find sender asleep on their couch because sender was watching over them. 

[ HAVEN ]  receiver wakes up in the morning to find sender asleep on their couch because sender felt safer with them. 

[ WEARY ]  sender cries themselves to sleep in receiver’s arms. 

[ TIRED ]  receiver cries themselves to sleep in sender’s arms. 

[ PROPOSITION ]  one or both muse(s) are having trouble sleeping so they have sex to pass the time. 

[ PURPOSE ]  one muse can’t sleep so the other initiates sex to wear them out. 

[ TRAPPED ]  one muse ends up staying the night with the other due to a storm. 

𝓪𝓵𝓼𝓸, 𝓸𝓾𝓻 𝓵𝓪𝓭𝔂 𝓼𝓪𝓲𝓭 𝓽𝓸 𝓾𝓼, "𝓽𝓱𝓸𝓼𝓮 𝔀𝓱𝓸 𝓫𝓻𝓲𝓷𝓰 𝓱𝓪𝓻𝓶 𝔀𝓲𝓽𝓱𝓸𝓾𝓽 𝓹𝓻𝓸𝓿𝓸𝓬𝓪𝓽𝓲𝓸𝓷 𝓽𝓸 𝓽𝓱𝓮 𝓵𝓮𝓪𝓼𝓽 𝓸𝓯 𝓱𝓲𝓼 𝓬𝓱𝓲𝓵𝓭𝓻𝓮𝓷 𝓪𝓻𝓮 𝓱𝓪𝓽𝓮𝓭 𝓪𝓷𝓭 𝓪𝓬𝓬𝓾𝓻𝓼𝓮𝓭 𝓫𝔂 𝓽𝓱𝓮 𝓶𝓪𝓴𝓮𝓻." 𝓪𝓷𝓭 𝓼𝓸 𝓲𝓽 𝓲𝓼 𝓶𝓪𝓭𝓮 𝓬𝓵𝓮𝓪𝓻 𝓽𝓸 𝓶𝓮, 𝓪𝓼 𝓲𝓽 𝓼𝓱𝓸𝓾𝓵𝓭 𝓫𝓮 𝓽𝓸 𝓾𝓼 𝓪𝓵𝓵: 𝓽𝓱𝓪𝓽 𝓶𝓪𝓰𝓲𝓬 𝔀𝓱𝓲𝓬𝓱 𝓯𝓾𝓮𝓵𝓼 𝓲𝓽𝓼𝓮𝓵𝓯 𝓫𝔂 𝓱𝓪𝓻𝓶𝓲𝓷𝓰 𝓸𝓽𝓱𝓮𝓻𝓼, 𝓫𝔂 𝓽𝓱𝓮 𝓵𝓮𝓽𝓽𝓲𝓷𝓰 𝓸𝓯 𝓫𝓵𝓸𝓸𝓭, 𝓲𝓼 𝓱𝓪𝓽𝓮𝓭 𝓫𝔂 𝓽𝓱𝓮 𝓶𝓪𝓴𝓮𝓻.

— from the sermons of justinia i

the chant perpetuated precious little apart from needless fear. semantics vilified magic, for steel, fist, and mortal machination could inflict equal harm upon another. magecraft necessitated the precise understanding spirits required to safely thrive. levering himself up and off the ground, emmrich made quiet note of their malignant audience. illario didn't strike him as andrastian of any denomination. the blood scenting the fade was unsanctified. how troublesome.

his dear crow possessed the introspection of a paperweight at the best of times.

"i've been called worse," mused emmrich, relaxing a trifle under illario's touch, "with the tragic exception of dwarves, everyone enters the fade by way of slumber. some people possess an inherent ability to enter it consciously. watchers utilise the practice of lucid dreaming and lyrium."

lyrium wasn't long for the order, not if they had a say. the thought was dismissed with haste, lest the fade supped from it. godkings and titans were non of illario's concern. emmrich exerted a modicum of arcane command to reset the stage. somewhere far from antiva ought do.

the world plunged unto darkness.

In Antiva, there were particular motifs in plays to inform the audience’s expectations. A crow often marked a tragedy looming over the heroes. Murder, death, an inescapable kind of fate. There, in the fade, it felt as if that ominous presence had been removed, the inevitability of a predicted end transmuted into unknown possibility.

As he watched the pale glow of the chambers around him, Illario’s mind felt clearer. He was for the most part ignorant of magic, the fade. Zara had shown him plenty through his reckless ‘education’ of blood magic, but much had been left out and even more he strived to repress from his mind. Even the mere thought of her name seemed to dim the lights around him. 

His hand stayed on Emmrich coat, gripping it as if he feared to be washed away if he were to let go. Still he found his old smile, sharp as ever, and just as transparent of a mask when it came to the professor. 

But she didn't want to be pissed off at Sami.

The couch groaned as she dropped down onto it, the springs protesting the careless abuse. Back bent like a bow she raped her arms once more on her knees, chewing at her lower lip as she stared down at her boots.

"Fuck." Easier to swear than to breathe at this point.

With a huff not unlike a petulant child, as quickly as she leaned forward she now melted back against the couch and let her arms cross once more.

"... You're serious?" She couldn't look at him even as she asked it. she just wished she didn't sound so small. "Like, serious-serious?"

It wasn't like death was anything new. She'd been a ghost her whole life, had tasted blood before she could drink, and every chapter was bookmarked with loss. But the idea of losing Sami?

It was a self terminating thought, something she couldn't actually finish processing.

The organic part of Sami’s cheek against her was soft, always too warm, even if the chrome dug at her. Less soft than he was before, reinforced. Just as small though, both of them. The years hadn’t made them any wiser, it was all just— accumulated damage. It never made them any stronger, they just found a way to survive it. Good or bad. More bad than good, truth be told.

“Dead serious,” he inhaled. Piper smelled like her bar, sweat, alcohol, cigarette smoke hanging in the air and caught on her hair. It still was oddly comforting, like they had just stepped out one of those gigs in some dive bar, passing out on someone’s couch, content. Happy even. 

He could say that about that time. Not always, but he had been happy, for a time it felt like it was all anyone needed. Not even fame or a record, just that small instant, the rush of playing, passing out on a drowsy, sweaty pile after screaming at each other for hours about how thrilling it had been, brainstorming new ideas, how to improve things. It was a romanticized version of course, even then there had been plenty of darkness. Fights with Gus, him playing skeezed out of his mind, Sami’s own struggles with it. But there were bright moments, he could at least claim those, when the time finally came. At least he’d have that.

By the window, Johnny nodded, silent and translucent as a ghost. Thinking of his own memories Sami had been partial witness to, the warm spaces between the petty fights. Kicking it backstage with Kerry, having a smoke and jamming with Denny or Nancy. Shit, even that asshole Henry had his bright moments back in the day.

he is not nearly as charming as he thinks he is. the faux swagger and non-chalance has never worked on her - more often than not irritating her beyond measure. she stands pressed against her desk, metal edge pressing uncomfortably against the small of her back and watches with eyebrows raised and arms crossed against her chest. the only reason she hasn’t ejected him from her space is because he is known now, familiar enough with her things that she’ll allow him to mess with it. 

she heaves a sigh as the panel is flicked open, resigning herself to the fact that she will have to correct whatever he breaks inside. “i have never said that.” she jumps to sit on the edge of the desk now, feet swinging and kicking once at the boot that is hanging off her arm rest. “ignorance is only bliss to those stupid enough not to know better.” she knows she’s being grumpy, but sami knocked on her door so late that it is now almost morning and she needs her rest. scrubbing her hands against her face, she does a double take at the mention of reptilians. gazing at him with a look of both confusion and exasperation. “you can’t just breeze past that, you know.” 

“Hey, stupid bliss sounds great, you got no idea. Man, most times I know more shit than I want to know,” he says it offhand, still in his joking voice, attention back to tinkering with the chair, but there’s a weight to those words. Many weights perhaps. He tried so hard all his life to make himself some brainless violent dog, he’s not meant to be involved with half of the things he knows.

Sami. He flinches slightly, it’s not strange for her to call him by his real name but it always has a pull. They feel like different people, Sami and V. The second for starters doesn’t have a past, just current bullshit, it’s easier that way.