police to meet you

“Ah yes, gotta keep the dutiful wife busy in front of the stove slaving away.” Amelia gave a chuckle immediately excusing herself to pick through the cabinet. I tall glass of fine for her and maybe a not as tall glass for Nell. “I picked up a few pilot lights while I was out so maybe you could put in a repair request.” Or, more than likely, Paul would try and fix it himself with flip of the coin success. 

She fishes out the bottle and fills a cup three-quarters full and another a quarter full. “Nell, you need a drink to relax. Plus you can’t make your guest drink alone, yeah?”

Nell had tried putting in repair requests before. For the stove, multiple times, the lights in Lena’s room that seem to have a mind of their own, this and that over the years that it had taken Paul too long to get around to. Every time someone had shown up to help, Paul had grilled her on why she didn’t trust him to do it himself. Nell eventually gave up. Now it’s up to him when things get fixed.

“Alright.” She steps in and sets the tray on the table before sitting in one of the kitchen chairs. It was the standard kitchen that had been there for the last two hundred years. A little scuffed on the edges of the stove but maintenance kept everything running standard. “So, what’s on the menu of Chez le Nell tonight?” No Mirelurk cakes or Radroach roast and Amelia would be happy. 

The last of the rads were still leaving her body after a solid week of two hundred year macaroni and mutant dog meat, Amelia was happy to smell a home cooked meal prepared by a lovely brunette. “Any wine on the menu tonight?”

They don’t get a ton of luxuries in the vault (whatever the scavengers return gets assessed and divided between the overseer and the inhabitants in a way the overseer sees fit) but they get given enough for a little variety in meals.

The vault suits were weird not quite catsuits. Being out in a wasteland was gritty but at least Amelia could wear something comfortable. It’d be a few weeks until she could get out again and Amelia was already looking forward to it. But Amelia supposed she could stand a few nights in if it meant she could spend some time with some of her favorite dwellers. “Evening,” Amelia says once Nell answered the door. “I brought some sweet rolls for dessert.” And with the baby left with a sitter Amelia had time to have a fun evening.

According to the textbooks she’d studied as a child, blue used to be the colour of the sky, of the seas and rivers. It’s the colour Nell and her fellow vault dwellers are forced to wear, day in and day out. It’s the colour of everything that surrounds her; it’s the colour of control. She knows this, and yet she, along with the majority of her friends, submit to it. It’s how they survive. 

She leaves the pot on the stove when she hears the door, greeting her guest with a smile. Amelia wears the same thing as everyone else but somehow it takes Nell a minute to find her tongue, taken aback by the sight before her.

Amelia makes blue look good.

“I don’t get why it takes so long either.” Another flick of the wrist. “I’m either pregnant or I’m not what is there to think about.” Not feeling particularly lucky today either “And I swear the waiting time is just to make me mad.” She uncrosses her legs and crosses them the other direction. Fidgeting, another shake to the tester.

Finally, she just moves her hand to pass it to Nell. “You take it, I hate always seeing it first.”

    “You sure?” she asks, taking it from her anyway. She clearly is - wouldn’t have offered it otherwise. A smile, and she leans in to press another kiss to Amelia’s shoulder.

Sitting back, her eyes fall to the plastic stick in her hand - nothing yet - and then back to her wife. “Hey, you know, however this turns out, we’re still going for ice cream.” It’s become a tradition, really; take the test, be disappointed in the results of said test, go get ice cream. It had been a cheer-up thing to start with, and now it’s just routine.

The timer starts to beep and it’s as if they haven’t done this a thousand times before. Nell’s heart jumps up to her throat, and she offers a small smile to her wife before looking down at the test resting in her lap.

It takes her a moment, a blink, and a second-look before the words fall from her mouth.

@nellchatterly gets a starter!

Lucius never gets to babysit. For good reason. Nell doesn’t trust him. For good reason. Unfortunately, Amelia does trust him and, somehow, Lucius got strapped with the three little gingers for a couple hours while Nell and Amelia went out. No one died. It’s a resounding success. When he hands one of the tiny little girls off to Mama’s arms, he says, “For the record she’s trying to say duck…we went to the duck pond, not the…y’know…anyway, it ain’t my fault she’s got a lisp.”

Wide eyed and lips pursed, staring Lucius dead in the eye with little Lilah on her hip, Nell’s putting her entire being into fighting back laughter. There’s still a smile on her lips, one she’s also duelling, attempting to keep on the smaller side, but she’s not doing very well.

“I don’t remember.” She set a timer, somewhere. It was only supposed to take two minutes but it never felt like two minutes. The first few times flew past, Amelia had expected too much. Now every second crawled under her skin and made her hair stand to attention. 

Perched on the edge of the bathtub Amelia gives the test a shake every few seconds as if it’s an old polaroid. “Maybe it’s broken.” They have a stack under the sink. They use at least three a month. One to see, two to be sure, and three to be extra, extra sure. “I hate this brand anyway.”

Nell leans over and presses her lips to her wife’s shoulder, leaving her face pressed against it for a little afterward, killing a few more seconds. She sits back up, and takes Amelia’s free hand in her own, giving it a squeeze as she looks toward her with an understanding smile.

Nell had come from a big, extended, family, and had known since she was a kid herself that that was something she never wanted to lose. The lights of the generations above her would slowly dwindle, until she and her siblings, cousins, were the brightest. The ones capable of giving their light to generations below them, but those generations had to spark first.

They'd gotten slightly further than failure some nine months ago, and, after having said goodbye to a son they’d never met, five months ago, resumed their attempts. The results, however, were to no avail. But still they try.

They’ve been told to perhaps seek other ways of extending their family, but this is something Amelia wants and, while Nell’s confidence in it has lessened, she stand by her. Or, sits in actuality, as the clock ticks, each sound a second closer to knowing.

The timer runs out and Lucius slams a hand on the table. “It’s hairspray!” he barks. “Hairspray! Woman–hair–spray. It doesn’t get easier than that!”

To be fair, Lucius’s scribbles aren’t much to work off of. He holds his pencil in a claw and has drawn a bunch of curlicues above a stick woman’s head. As though that was supposed to mean much. Pictionary was a good idea, in concept, and Amelia had all good intentions of a fun game night, but putting Lucius and Nell on the same team was probably not the smartest move, especially when the two get far too competitive to their own good.

Nell takes the gun. And that’s all Lucius needs right now. He doesn’t need her faith in humanity restored. He doesn’t need her to smile. He just needs her to move her feet, raise a gun, and shoot. It’s the end of the world. They’re all allowed to be miserable. The only dead weight is someone who lets their misery swallow them whole. 

Hell, even Junior collects firewood.

“As I’m sure you’ve noticed by now, we’re running thin on rations.” Thin is the nice way to put it. They ran out a couple days ago. Old-school Lucius divvied up what little they had left between the women and young Junior. It’s do or die time. Before their brains get too hazy.

“There’s a supermarket that hasn’t been picked clean yet about twenty miles out. Only problem is, the reason no one’s picked it clean ‘s because it’s swarming with walkers.” To the point: “I need back up and, from what I remember, you’re a pretty damn good shot.”

Supermarkets don’t exactly hold the best of memories for Nell, and she flinches a little at the thought. Lucius is all she has left, and as capable as he is, he’d described the run himself as a suicide mission. Losing him too might be outside the parameters of coping for her. If you could call what she’s currently doing coping.

But she’s hungry. Everyone’s hungry. And someone’s got to go. So why not her? If they make it back with supplies, everyone’s happy, if they don’t and she finds herself being torn to shreds, at least she’ll have nothing to worry about anymore. She’ll get what she’d wanted those couple of weeks back; an escape.

“’Cause Amelia’d never gonna forgive me when we find her.” He crouches down in front of the grief-spent woman and extends a gun her way. Because why not give someone in mourning a loaded weapon? “Get up. You’ll like this,” he said. “Practically a suicide mission. Right up your alley.”

Nell stares at him for a moment, eyes on his, allowing her earlier outburst to settle. She’s angry, struggling to find a reason not to be, or a reason to carry on. She never thought she’d say it, but Lucius is honestly the closest thing to a reason she has. He’s determined. It’s that determination that gives her the little kick she needs to keep her act together.

She shrugs, reaches out, grabs the gun.

1. Do they prefer to wear headphones or earbuds when listening to music?

2. What do they do when they're feeling tired and need to stay awake?

3. Do they usually eat mild, medium, or spicy salsa?

4. Pizza, McDonalds, or Chinese take-out?

5. How do they react to finding out someone has a crush on them?

6. How do they feel about unrequited love?

7. How would they fare in a zombie apocalypse?

8. Gold, silver, or copper jewelry?

9. How much ice do they put in their drinks?

10. Do they use Instagram, Facebook, or Tumblr? If so, how much/often?

11. What's their desktop background?

12. How are they at taking care of plants?

13. Did they have any phases? (e.g. emo, punk, scene...)

14. How did they do academically in high school?

15. Are they the big spoon or the little spoon?

16. How do they like their eggs?

17. How do they like their toast?

18. Queso or guacamole?

19. What are they like as a neighbor?

20. How do they behave when confronted with deadlines?

21. What's the weirdest thing you're likely to find in their room?

22. What fictional character do they relate to the most?

23. Do they like raisins in their pastries? If no, will it stop them from eating it?

24. When forced to do a group project with other people, what role do they usually play?

25. Does your muse listen to vinyl records? Do they use iTunes? Do they legally or illegally download music?

26. How would your muse do at taking care of a goldfish?

27. Is your muse a dreamer or a realist?

28. Android, iPhone, or other?

29. What's their Subway order?

30. Trendsetter, trend follower, or trend ignorer?

31. What about themselves do they usually not tell people? What are they embarrassed of?

32. What's their ideal vacation?

33. White, red, or rose wine?

34. Are they outdoorsy? Do they enjoy hiking, camping, etc.?

35. What's their Starbucks order?

36. What colors make up most of their wardrobe?

37. Do they believe in any conspiracy theories? Fear a zombie apocalypse/AI overtake? How do they think the world will end?

38. Do they play video games? If so, which ones?

39. What would you see if you looked through their trashcan?

40. What kind of videos do they get recommended on YouTube?

41. Are they an exhibitionist? Do they ever change in front of windows? Have sex when they know people can see/hear?

42. How do they feel about astrology?

43. Why do people usually call them on the telephone? To complain? To ask for advice? To ask them to do something for them?

44. Have they ever had any pregnancy scares?

45. Lord of the Rings or Harry Potter?

46. Do they meme? Enjoy memes? Create memes? Find them horribly annoying? How about shitposts?

47. How do they go about asking someone out or confessing their feelings about someone to them?

48. When do they usually go to bed?

49. In the "sleep vs. grades vs. social life, pick two" situation, which two do they pick?

By a cruel twist of fate, Nell is, undeniably, perfect for Amelia. It obvious to anyone–even to Lucius–that she cares about the other woman. He realizes it now, suddenly. Strange, really, since he’d assumed Amelia was some kind of fetish for Nell, something pretty to play around with. That was, after all, the way all the men that came before had treated Amelia–and Lucius had seen her through some not-so-pretty relationships. If you could call them that. Flashes in the pan, two people using each other to get what they wanted and then going their separate ways.

Nell…her heart bleeds for Amelia. It’s occurs to Lucius that she’s saying all the things he would’ve loved to hear someone say, long ago, before Amelia was ever married. That maybe, in another life, he might’ve given the girls his blessing.

But it’s a moot point. Because Amelia is married. You can’t fix one sin with another sin, and that’s all Lucius sees. Maybe, once upon a time, Nell could have helped Amelia. But now, it’s beyond that. Now, all she’s doing is dragging Amelia further down this toxic rabbit hole.

“It doesn’t matter, alright? None of it matters. ‘Cause it ain’t your business. You ain’t part of this family, you’re just an interloper.” Ten letter word. That’s a big deal for Lucius. His rage is losing some of its steam. He isn’t shouting at her anymore, it’s just numb, bitter reality. “If y’really care about her, don’t make her bear the weight a’ being an unfaithful wife. You should leave before Marcus gets back.”

Lucius is right; Nell isn’t a part of their family, never claimed to be, never considered herself as much. She considers herself a friend. Maybe she goes above and beyond what any normal friend would do for Amelia, maybe that has something to do with the fact that, over the past few months, Nell’s spent a lot of her time falling in love with the woman, but in the long-run, she still expects nothing. As long as Amelia’s happy and safe, with or without her, so is she.

Of course, it’d be nicer for Amelia to be happy and safe with her, Nell won’t deny that. But she’d known from the first moment she’d felt a flutter in her stomach that she was wading in deep water. A wrong step and she’s drowning, dragging Amelia down with her.

    “You know, I ain’t known the guy long, but I knew from the second I met your brother that somethin’ weren’t right. I don’t know how you’ve sat there for God knows how many years watchin’ this happen-- lettin’ it. Maybe I ain’t a part of your family, but maybe it’s family that’s supposed to do what I’m doin’. Lookin’ out for her.” She pauses, continuing to look him directly in the eye, as she had been while speaking. “I’ll go. But if you think I trust you enough after everythin’ I know you’ve ignored to just remove myself from her life like I know you want me to do, you got another thing comin’.”