personal diary

Yes ma'am!

Body goals

Body goals

this mentality

Yup...

Real

So I've been doing fairly good with eating less but this week really kick starts even less good...I had a bagel this morning but that's all I wanna eat...I also had a hot chocolate (w water instead of milk) and ik it comes out to a total of 130 cal...so that's about it for today. Obviously just water for the rest of the day and if I get hungry or need energy I have bought myself some ensures...so I'll have one later on if need. I will also workout today...so I should be able to burn off the hot Chocolate and bagel later today..😃

I literally feel so depressed...I feel like I wanna cry but also feel nothing. I'm getting irritated easily rn and...i just wanna sleep all the time. I just hate my skin and the way I look. I just hate myself so much and wish I could love myself but I can't and I find it so hard to believe I will ever be able to...but rn is the hardest...I just wish I was skinny..

Need a body like this...

Def needed this video

I need to change...im over feeling and being ugly. Truly. I feel like it has ruined me for so long. I have been ugly and fat ever since I can remember...at least to me I feel like I have. Sometimes I look back at pictures and think maybe I didn't look that bad but it doesn't matter because that time was wasted with me feeling insecure. I actually do want to look pretty but it won't help if I don't feel confident in the moment. I am now 20...going to be 21 in april...I can't believe I have wasted so much of my life not being determined to changing the way I look buy by the end of the year...maybe sooner, I plan on looking completely different. I need to shock everyone, including myself. I will go hard and extreme bc I have wasted to much time. So it starts today...