natasha ivy

Left: Egon Schiele - Two Girls Embracing (Friends), 1915 

Cloud 9.. And 10

I dreamt of an old flame. He’s a good friend I’ve made overseas whom at one point in our travels, overpowered with wonder, entertained ourselves with each other. It was a dream of dreaming, we would meet in each others’ unconscious minds as we slept each night to catch up and be intimate. I’d walk to the edge of my “cloud” and he to his; we’d meet right where they intermingled. There was a boulder taking up most of the space in between each cloud but was connected magnetically to his. In between my cloud and this large rock was a stream with other smaller rocks. In order for me to get onto the rock where we’d meet I’d have to cross over the stream, hop on logs, and over forest creatures. At the beginning of our cosmic unconscious courtship it was difficult for me to get there; I’d slip on mossy rocks and fall into the stream before reaching our common place. In one instance at the end of the dream after several meet-ups, he looked at me as I arrived to the boulder and complimented me on how gracefully I did so. He mentioned how clumsy I was at first and how beautifully and effortlessly I could now balance over the rocks and skate through the mossy ground beneath me. This new routine and constant action becoming habitual and easier with repetition. Through several of these trips I had finally mastered the way and learned the land to get to him.

Sitting here trying to decode. Why was the boulder on his cloud? Why was I the one having to make physical effort and defeat challenge for us to meet? Why a body of water and other natural elements being those challenges? Why that particular person if I have no emotional attachment to them?