over 30 black enby queer. here to have too many feelings about the Gay Pirate Show (and lately, the Gay Slavic Knight Game). she/her, if you insist on perceiving me. same name on AO3. fundraiser asks from strangers get you blocked.
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Part 4: Continuing to Channel my Disappointment in TVL by recommending queer & poc horror (and other genre fiction). Today's pick is Cherie Dimaline.
Cherie is a MĂŠtis Nation writer, who writes folklore horror, dystopian fiction, fantasy, young adult books, and more. Werewolf preachers, feminist witches, colonizing bone harvesters, queer ghost romance, queer secret gardens, I never know what I'm going to get with her or what to expect other than that the story is absolutely going to be filled with political metaphors, which is my shit. She explains in this short interview the importance of stories and how it is a way for her family and people to "carry home" despite being removed from their own land repeatedly. It's a repeated theme in her work.
Read:
The Marrow Thieves: A Young Adult, dystopian novel that's short but impactful. The book is about a future where white folks are incapable of dreaming so they round up indigenous folks and harvest their marrow in order to dream again. It's an apt metaphor and it is HEAVY. Fortunately, the novel does not spend any real time inside of the facilities/metaphor for reservation schools. It instead focuses on a group of survivors on the run to avoid or escape these places. It's not a cynical read but there are sacrifices and you will lose characters you love. CW info near the end of the post.
If you'd like to learn more about reservation schools, I highly recommend Connie Walker's podcast "Stolen: Surviving St. Michael's" which follows her investigation into her father's residential school abuser (who her former police officer father beat nearly to death when he pulled the priest over). She won a Pulitzer for it for good reason. She speaks to a lot of her family who really contend with repressed memories and how the residential school system enacted cycles of abuse that they are trying to break. It's heartbreaking but very much worth it and yes, she talks to the priest who likely abused her father.
Also, also, I recommend the tv show Reservation Dogs' Deer Lady episode in season 3. You could watch it as a stand alone, but obviously you'd get more out of it with the whole show. It is an creative, terrifying, and devastating depiction of what it likely felt like for children in reservation schools, who were stripped of their language and culture. No actual scenes of CSA but heavily hinted at. There is a somewhat satisfying ending but it's a bit hollow like most revenge typically is. It's a beautiful episode that kept me up all night crying and angry.
Empire of Wild: If you like a little folk horror, this one's for you. It's a story about the Rougaroux myth and follows a MĂŠtis woman, Joan, searching for her husband, Victor, who disappears after they have a fight. Two years later, She tracks him down with the help of her 12 year old nephew named Zeus. They discover Victor is preaching for white evangelical christians in order to convert people in their community. In this book, the myth of the Rougaroux centers on a werewolf like creature who trolls around indigenous communities to prey on and change boys and men who disrespect their women, land or communities. I won't spoil the direction it's going in but know that it is eerie, political, and even a little horny.
VenCo: Do you like witches? Of course, you like witches. What are you? A Puritan? Lucky St. James, orphan of a "badass MĂŠtis good-times girl" and her grandmother Stella, are about to be evicted. Lucky is summoned via magic spoon to be one of seven witches in the Venco coven. Lucky and her grandmother are sent on a U.S. road trip to find the 7th witch before the witch hunter, Jay Christos, finds her first. It has horror, fantasy, magical realism, comedy, everything.
To Read: Haven't read these yet but they're on the list:
Funeral Songs for Dying Girls: YA. A teen girl hangs out in the cemetery her mother is buried in a lot, so much so that rumors start to spread that its haunted. Con artist ghost tour shenanigans ensue in order to save her father's crematorium business and continue to live near her mother's grave. She meets a real ghost. Friendship and queer love ensue. Haven't read it yet so I can't tell you more than what goodreads told me but it's definitely on the list.
Hunting by Stars: Sequel to The Marrow Thieves. I don't even want to give away the basic summary online as it would spoil aspects of the first book for you.
Into the Bright Open: YA book described as a queer YA reimagining of "The Secret Garden." Color me intrigued.
Some Notes:
If you want to see the other recs, just click the "lottafeelingsinhere recs" tag. Also, if you'd like to make other rec suggestions, please do!
Rather than try to remember every single CW warning I can think of for books I may have read years ago, I recommend checking out: https://triggerwarningdatabase.com/ Most of the books I recommend are the type of books that take real world political horrors and turn them into metaphorical monsters. So they're all pretty upsetting.
I know I said I'd stop clogging up the iwtv/tvl tags with this so I'm sticking to the tvl critical one bc I know ppl in that tag enjoy being literate. If you're tired of seeing this pop up in the tag tho, block "lottafeelingsinhere recs" or block me entirely :)
When 1780 babies in Cuba die due to the measurably heightened effects of the blockade on the medical system, you must understand this as the United States murdering 1780 Cuban babies. Despite having one of the world's most advanced medical systems, and the highest doctors per capita compared to any other country (over 2.5x that of the United States) 10s of 1000s of people are unable to access medical treatment in Cuba because of the strangulation of the Cuban healthcare system. The defense of Cuba is a litmus test for socialists, you must condemn Imperialism, not the revolution, the blockade is an act of genocide
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The "character" of Jitka of Kunstadt is a microcosm of how people approach female characters in media, female characters in fandom, and by extension, women in real life.
This "character" does not appear at any point in the KCD canon. She does not have a game model. She has no lines of dialogue. All we know about her comes from 1) a summary and a stylized illustration in the codex and 2) various opinions from male characters. She is a non-entity. In the Silmarillion fandom, we call this type of character a "textual ghost."
And yet, because of her relevance and proximity to the male leads, she is an elephant in the room who must be addressed by serious fan creators. How you choose to portray her becomes your whole CV re: shipping, misogyny, the role of women in your story, and the role of women in your life. The fandom will read this CV and draw any conclusions they like from it. No matter how you choose to handle Jitka, she will be held up against the (nonexistent) "real" Jitka as determined by the headcanons of whoever is reading your interpretation.
What this means is that no matter how you handle Jitka, there is already someone who has chosen to believe that your interpretation is cheap, shallow, and misogynistic, simply because it is different from their idea of who Jitka of Kunstadt is supposed to be.
If she's cold and spiteful, she should have been warm and supportive. If she's warm and supportive, she should have been cold and spiteful.
If she's horny, she should have been chaste. If she's chaste, she should have been horny.
If she's a lesbian, she should have been straight. If she's straight, she should have been a lesbian.
If she's assertive and confident, she should have been shy and passive. If she's shy and passive, she should have been assertive and confident.
And so on and so forth.
An additional layer of interpretation comes from the fact that most fanfiction writers are female, and to some extent, the way we write Jitka is an answer to the question of "what would I want in this situation," coupled with the ever-present awareness of the "evil fujoshi sidelining women so the boys can kiss" stereotype. What may start as an honest attempt to give this fictional woman a happy life may be interpreted as "turning every female third wheel into a supportive hag wingman." But, if you write Jitka as an adversary and break up her marriage with Hans (again, in an attempt to release them from a life they didn't choose and might not want), then you're "demonizing and villainizing women who get in the way of your ship." There's no version of Jitka who will ever be acceptable to every reader, and no version of how you handle her relationship to Hansry will ever be "unproblematic."
"Jitka of Kunstadt" is an OC. She's a suggestion of a character. She's an invitation to self-insert. She's an invitation to rewrite, remix, and reinterpret. I reiterate: she does not appear in canon and has no lines of dialogue. She only exists to the extent that fan creators call her into existence.
There is no "correct" Jitka of Kunstadt. Instead, the way you write her will always be held up against an ever-shifting and paradoxical ideal as determined by the fandom at large. She will never, ever be "good enough."
Sometimes I wish we would start calling out the performative radicalism on this site for the poser bullshit it is. "Remember, it's always morally correct to kill a cop!" "Don't forget to firebomb your local government office!" "Wow, it sure would be a shame if these instructions on how to make a molotov cocktail got spread around!"
Okay. But you're not killing cops or firebombing government offices. You are posting on a dying microblogging website to a carefully-curated echo chamber that has radicalized itself into thinking that taking the absolute most extreme position on any subject is praxis but that anyone discussing the most practical way to effect actual change is your sworn enemy. You do not have the street cred OR the activist cred to be talking about killing cops, babe.
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Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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Our Flag Means Death has some wonderful transitions but I was thinking today about the moment the show really hit me personally. I had really enjoyed the first few episodes, but in Discomfort In a Married State we see Stede trying but failing to fit in at home with his family, clearly unhappy. Trapped on a path he hates.  Dreaming of a life on the ocean but being told ânoâ.
In a flashback we see him standing at the mirror, taking off his nightgown and looking at himself as if asking âwho am I?â. There's a candle behind him, it's light mostly hidden, like the real Stede is in his old life.
We then see him in his hallway, bag and coat in his arms, lit by that bright candle standing proudly in the foreground. Â Light. Â Clarity. Stede openly starting that journey to discover who he is.
Then, as he turns full circle, we see him on the Revenge in the early morning as dawn breaks. A new day, a new life. Â
Itâs a wonderful transition and this is where the show really knocked me for six.  Stede was so brave in that moment, leaving everything he knew for a life he has dreamed of yet really knew nothing about. But he was strong enough to take that risk and it is why I will always love Stede Bonnet with my whole heart.  That moment changed me.  All of us are travelling through our lives as best we can. We have responsibilities, obligations, and we can let ourselves be overwhelmed by them â forget even who we were before those responsibilities took over. Stedeâs bravery encouraged my own.  In seeking out a new life, a new community and friendship, Stede Bonnet encouraged me to do the same.  I returned to an old community and in this show I also found a new one, with new friends. Itâs no exaggeration to say that this show made my life so much richer and I will be forever grateful.
I said this post was about transition, and thatâs exactly what it is. A transition from one life to another, accompanied by wonderful cinematography and set dressing. Â Itâs glorious and it's inspiring. Thank you so much Stede Bonnet and the 'behind the scenes' crew.
