Fight me

With their arm around Ri Ahn, they smirked. Not only because he kept calling them cute with a little playful banter over blushing but because of his next statement too. “It takes more than eye rolls and a few words to get rid of me. I can reciprocate.” It would have sucked if you truly left. That meant a lot to Jordan. That Ri Ahn wanted them around, even before now. “Babe, huh?” Jordan smiled, moving some of Ri Ahn’s hair away from his eyes before leaning in to kiss him. “You’re welcome. And for the record, I don’t plan on going anywhere. So… please don’t ever think that. That I’d disappear and just ghost you or something. And no more mornings like this one. If I have to leave and don’t want to wake you, I’ll leave a note. Communication.” That was the least they could do, to make sure Ri Ahn never thought Jordan abandoned him. Plus, leaving notes was kind of cute. “I know, I know,” Jordan chuckled, “Little Red Riding Hood was one of them, yeah. Ivy’s helped me before. She’s probably the closest thing I’ve ever had to a sister. And Danny, my roommate. He’s the other one.” They propped themselves up on their elbow. “I’ll always be soft and sappy, don’t worry. I just wish I was a little tougher.” Because they didn’t think that would be such a horrible thing. Maybe they wouldn’t be such a pushover then. “Talking about a shower while in bed makes your imagination go wild? Hm?” Jordan sat up with a smirk, only trying to tease him before forcing themselves to get up. They gathered any wrappers and empty coffee cups, tossing them away in the kitchen. “If you leave it up to me, I’m just gonna wanna stay in bed,” Jordan warned, heading for the bathroom to shower. 

“Let’s be honest, you don’t even have to do anything. You just turn me into a blushing fool.” A blushing, happy fool. Hopefully that wouldn’t change anytime soon. Part of Jordan still felt like maybe this wouldn’t last, dwelling on the negative. But if they didn’t try, they wouldn’t know. And they wouldn’t be where they were now. That was the positive. They couldn’t avoid relationships forever, and this definitely felt like a step in the right direction for once. 

“But I knew you weren’t serious. I think?” If Ri Ahn had been serious about not wanting Jordan around, they believed he would have tried harder. Or been more blunt. “You’re already the exception to a lot of things. And you should thank me for being stubborn. If I would have listened to you and left you alone, we probably still wouldn’t even know each other’s names.” Jordan shifted slightly, nestling back against Ri Ahn and making sure they were both comfortable before settling. “I know at least two cops that you could trust. Detectives. They’re good people. It’s sad that they’re not all like that. They should be,” they mumbled their words, knowing what Ri Ahn meant by not trusting them. “I won’t, I won’t. We can rub off on each other. I’ll give you some sappy, you give me some tough. It’ll all balance out.” They felt like they were talking nonsense at this point. As if they were drunk off of Ri Ahn, resting against him, their heart full and content. “We should probably shower. And start the day. But… bed. And you,” Jordan muttered. The only thing they would have to do today was make sure to feed Luna once they went home in case Danny didn’t. Otherwise, they were on board with taking a lazy day. 

“If that’s the case, then you should only blame yourself, I don’t do anything, I’m the innocent one here, but I suffer the consequences of your blushing, it’s so fucking cute” And part of Ri Ahn hated it because it only took a look to their face to melt, while the other part absolutely loved it because he fucking melted for Jordan and it was such a foreign feeling that he was enjoying so damn much. He never imagined someone would make him feel this way, so he was pretty excited that it was Jordan the one who caused all this mess inside his body.

“Hate to break it to you, but anything work related is definitely not happening today.” Jordan was glad they were on the same page there because they were far too comfortable where they were. And after last night, the both of them having a lazy day seemed just right. “We’re really not. And stop making me blush!” They laughed, playfully smacking at Ri Ahn’s shoulder and hiding there. “Lucky you. It doesn’t make anything else less true, though. You, smiling and laughing? Heart instantly melted.” Jordan pulled away from him enough to meet his eyes with a smile. 

“I knew it. You know, you trying to push me away probably only made me try harder. You’re lucky I didn’t give up. We wouldn’t be here right now otherwise. Two stubborn assholes, cuddled up in your bed.” They already said it but if Ri Ahn wasn’t injured from fighting then, Jordan probably wouldn’t have been so adamant either. But still. “Police uniforms creep you out? Like, bad memories?” On the bright side, Ivy and Danny didn’t wear uniforms, so that was something they didn’t have to worry about. Being in the physical position Jordan was in, they felt like they should progress more. More than kissing. But they reminded themselves that it wasn’t necessary. Jordan slowly pulled away from the kissing and returned to Ri Ahn’s side, arm around his middle as they nuzzled against him, resting their eyes. “I’m so glad everything worked out.”

“I’m devastated” He replied, giving them a small smile because honestly, why would they even move when this was so comfortable and they were having such a great time just lying next to each other. “Stop blushing! I’m not doing anything!” And he could swear he was not laughing and not smiling but he wasn’t sure because Jordan kept making him do things he wasn’t used to doing, and smiling was definitely among those. So maybe they were right, maybe he was smiling and laughing much more now.

“Do all of…? No, it’s fine! I just figured it’s something we could both look up and try to figure out together. Not necessarily today, but yeah.” Because it was easier when there was help, right? And surely if they put both of their brains together, they could figure something out when it came to technology and art. “It’s still yours. And it’s all yours to do whatever you want with it. But it is nice to share because then, people can see all of your beautiful, hard work. Then they can tell you how much they love it. And that’s a great feeling.” Art wasn’t meant to be hidden, no. Jordan didn’t want Ri Ahn to ever feel like he had to do anything either, though. “No… are you trying to make me blush? Stopppp…” Jordan bit their lip to try and stop themselves from smiling before they ended up burrowing against Ri Ahn to hide, unsure how to handle compliments. “That’s you. You just described yourself.” Jordan picked their head up, covering their face with their hand and poking Ri Ahn’s nose.

Jordan slowly nodded. Ri Ahn didn’t have anything against people, he just liked to be alone. No. He was just used to being alone. But he was okay with people. That was good to know. “Except me when I wouldn’t leave you alone, right?” Jordan tried to tease, poking at his side. They knew they probably annoyed the hell out of Ri Ahn when they first met because they wouldn’t ever leave him be. At his question, Jordan’s immediate response was to try and make another joke but they held back. Because you know what? Ri Ahn was right. Jordan didn’t really have anything to lose in trying. “I’m gonna lose my cute scrubs and trade them in for a uniform.” It was still on the joking side of things, but on a positive note. A step up. And uniforms were kinda hot. Jordan smiled when he called them his weak spot, letting their hands run over his chest. “I think I can still let you win from time to time. I’m generous like that.” They leaned down, kissing Ri Ahn again and gently biting his lip.

“Oh alright, because honestly, I don’t really feel like working at all today” It was way too nice to wake up with Jordan, even when technically they had been gone when he woke up, laying like this and just talking and fooling around was too nice to change it for work related stuff. “Shit, we really need to stop with the complimenting each other thing, I don’t think either of us is good at taking compliments” He remarked because it seemed like they were both not used to have those words directed at them. “I told you you look fucking cute when you blush, fucking adorable” He remarked again because watching them blush and hiding their face from him was absolutely adorable. “I don’t blush” So yeah, he was totally describing Jordan.

“But that’s okay. I mean, you’re talking to someone who got excited over emojis, so…” Jordan chuckled. With the update Apple just had, and like the child they were, the first thing Jordan did was text Joon the ear emoji with a hearing aid. It was cool to see the inclusiveness. “Maybe courage isn’t the right word. It isn’t easy, though. Being that personal with strangers. Sharing your work.” It didn’t seem easy to them, anyway. Mostly because they’d be too critical of themselves but they didn’t want to say that and make Ri Ahn paranoid either. Luna doesn’t count. That made them laugh. “Literally anything. Definitely nature. Have you seen the trees lately? All the leaves changing colors? That’s probably like, the prettiest palette. I don’t even know if I’m using that word right. But it’s pretty.” Then they’d have to deal with snow before too long, which was also pretty but a pain in the ass. 

“I know, I know. I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to make any sort of implication.” Ri Ahn was grumpy when they first met but that was it, and Jordan knew that. “Noooo, I’m not…” Jordan was going to argue that they weren’t lazy. Because they weren’t. But maybe they were this time because it felt pointless to argue, joking or not, so they just shook their head. “I’m just a bit wary of the unknown. I’ll look into it.” It was possible Jordan was a master at changing topics, whether they fully realized it or not. Straddling Ri Ahn, they smiled, fingers raking through their hair. “Are you trying to tell me I found a weak spot? A soft spot?” Jordan found his hands, lacing their fingers together and giving them a squeeze. It felt odd, this closeness. Odd but… amazing? “That seems like it could be dangerous. But maybe that’s good to know. For winning arguments.” Fingers still laced together, Jordan leaned down to find Ri Ahn’s lips.

“Doesn’t mean I want you to do all those things for me, though” Because he didn’t want them to feel responsible now for his incoming and his art work, if Ri Ahn ws going to do this, he didn’t want for Jordan to feel like they had to do anything, they already had already lots of things on their plate to add worries about what Ri Ahn was doing with his life. “Yeah, maybe I just need to let it go and stop thinking of it as mine, you know, after all, art is supposed to be shared” What was the point of painting so much if he didn’t show it to anyone? “Have you seen yourself when the sun hits your face? Or when you smile how adorable your entire face looks? When you blush it’s fucking cute too” Shit, Ri Ahn was being sappy again, but it was what they caused on him and he couldn’t help it.

A smile instantly took to Jordan’s lips as Ri Ahn seemed to join them, getting comfortable and nuzzling against them. They put an arm around him in return and let their fingers gently brush over him. “I’m sure that’s something a simple internet search could help us figure out. If there’s a certain website you could use or something.” The thought of Ri Ahn even having his own space to have his art was amazing, whether it was digital or if his work was on display in an art show. “I know that takes a lot of courage. To put yourself out there like that. Your artwork.” Jordan playfully poked Ri Ahn’s nose. And again, they knew they should have taken his words as a compliment. Part of them did. But they still couldn’t help shaking their head. “There are better things that you could paint, though. But… thank you.”

Jordan buried their face in their hands with a laugh. “That’s not what I meant, I swear! You are perfectly capable of befriending people.” They smiled, nodding. “I don’t have any desire to go through your phone. You, on the other hand…” Letting one hand slip under Ri Ahn’s shirt, they let it rest on his chest, giving a small pat as they leaned into a kiss. Jordan let it progress a little before ultimately giving Ri Ahn’s lip a small bite, pulling away. Damn… This really felt surreal. Taking a deep breath, they nodded again. “I don’t really know what I want. I mean, I feel like I could do more than what I’m doing now, you know? But I shouldn’t complain because the pay is decent and I couldn’t ask for better hours.” If they went through with it, it’d be a whole new surrounding and twelve hour days and they would lose their weekends, but the pay would still be decent. And they could potentially help people. Jordan rubbed their eyes before maneuvering some more, finding themselves straddling Ri Ahn’s hips again with a smirk. “What about going to the aquarium? For a date. It’s definitely a lot more chill than hiking.”

“Technology is not really my thing” He felt like one of those grandparents that had to keep asking their grandchildren for help to get everything done, simply because he never really got access to anything like that while growing up. His phone was probably the most modern thing he owned and it wasn’t even that new. “I don’t think of it as courage? But yeah, I mean, it is sharing something personal with strangers, it’s weird” Because his art was personal, not commercial, and maybe that’s why it had taken him so long to even attempt to show his art somewhere. “Better than you? Name me one, and Luna doesn’t count” He told them because honestly, he couldn’t think of anything more beautiful than them.

“Uh huh, sure.” Now they’d definitely have to make sure they broke out their leather jacket and boots, if only just to tease Ri Ahn. It just hadn’t been cold enough during the day to wear it yet. “Of course he’s genuinely interested. I’m sure it’ll go well. If it doesn’t, we can always brainstorm another way to get your artwork out there.” Jordan rubbed Ri Ahn’s arm with a smile. “Really? In that case, I am super honored. And I’m glad I had you sign it because it just makes it that much more official. An official Nam original. I think that has a pretty nice ring to it.”

“Hella cute. But don’t worry. You are secret safe with me.” Jordan grinned. “There you go. Next time you hang out with him, you should bring it up. Never hurts to start planning ahead. And if it’s something that interests him, that just makes it an even better topic for conversation.” They bit their lip to try and stop themselves from laughing. Duh, of course they took a look. “Yeah, but in my defense, who wouldn’t? It’s a little distracting.” Snooping, though? Jordan immediately shook their head. They’d been on the other end of that and even if there wasn’t anything to hide, it was nice to have privacy. “You’re right here. I don’t need to look for pictures when I have the real deal.” They leaned over and kissed Ri Ahn on the cheek before pulling away with a smile and maneuvering around to lay down, burrowing a bit under the blanket again. “Well… once they have enough training, they work with paramedics. Like, first responders when there’s an emergency call. Keep people in a stable condition until they reach the hospital for treatment.”

Following Jordan’s movements and getting under the blankets, Ri Ahn simply wrapped an arm around Jordan, pulling them closer and burying his nose against their neck. They could do this now, right? Because they were dating and closeness was a new thing they could try. As usual, he would always wait for Jordan to be comfortable with anything they did, but this seemed innocent and comfortable enough to try it out. “Maybe I can sell them online, I’m not really good with computers so I wouldn’t really know how to even do that” He was getting more and more confident that his art could actually turn into a way of living, so trying wouldn’t hurt him. “I’ll paint you one day but that’s a painting I’ll never sell” Because if he ever get them in a canvas, then he would definitely want to keep that to himself.

Jordan laughed at Ri Ahn’s reaction. “That was my way of trying to fit in and look cool. It didn’t work too well, obviously. Is that your subtle way of saying you have a thing for the whole bad boy look?” Back on the topic of fights though, Jordan knew they needed to just drop it. Stop bringing it up all together. It wasn’t something they would ever feel… positive about. But they didn’t want to make Ri Ahn feel like he had to choose. They just wanted to make sure he knew they cared, that they would always be concerned, but they would also stay by his side and help. That was what they agreed to and they were sticking to it. So, Jordan slowly nodded with a smile. “Just try to keep it that way. Dragan Gallery? That sounds nice. If they have any taste, it’ll definitely work out. I have your painting of Luna proudly on display at my place. So, I reserve the right to be the first gallery to show off this amazing artist.” Jordan nudged him with a giggle.

That was one way to put it. At least Ri Ahn was straightforward. “Okay, just making sure.” Still leaning against his shoulder, Jordan patted his leg before leaving their hand to rest there, smiling when they heard his little “shut up” remark. “It’s cute. You’re cute. Oh? Mr. Bad Boy used to have a motorcycle? Seems like a pretty good way to bond. Any involvement of alcohol helps too.” Drinking was the easiest way to make friends, at least in Jordan’s experience. Help loosen everyone up. “Ha, bad shape. I’ve seen a picture of you shirtless. You are far from being in bad shape.” Maybe that was a detail they could have left out but oh well. They’d be seeing each other shirtless sooner or later. “That day when you handed me your phone to look at your paintings. Just to clarify. I wasn’t snooping or anything.” Jordan picked their head back up and raked their fingers through their hair, finishing off their coffee. They gathered any mess and wrappers and got up to toss them in the garbage before returning to Ri Ahn’s side with a smile. “You know… I was thinking about maybe trying to become an EMT. I haven’t looked into it too much, but what I did find so far was that it doesn’t require a degree? Just training. And… the knowledge could definitely come in handy.” Jordan playfully poked at Ri Ahn’s side.

“Fuck fitting in” People shouldn’t try to fit in with others, but he could understand why a teen would try that and why it would be important while growing up. “Maybe, I won’t admit nor deny anything” Because he might have a thing for the bad boy look. He wasn’t one to get his hopes up s o the gallery thing was an option, yeah, and he would give it a try, but he wasn’t going to put all his cards there. If it worked, then great, but if it didn’t, well, it wouldn’t be the first time that his paintings would be rejected by people. He would still paint though, that wasn’t in question, but it would be nice to have people interested in what he did. “Yeah, the guy seemed genuinely interested so we’ll see how that goes, but yeah, your place is the first one to show a Nam original” He smiled back at them, kind of proud by their words, Jordan seemed to really like that and somehow that made him feel even more happy.

“The element of surprise.” Jordan propped a finger on their chin all innocently before cracking a smile. It would be perfect if they actually did have a tougher side to them because no one would expect it, including Ri Ahn by the sounds of it. “More like muscle shirts and snapbacks. So, maybe it wasn’t a tough look and more of a douchebag look?” Jordan flexed an arm, chuckling. “I have a leather jacket though, I just haven’t worn it lately.” And they had the earrings. To be honest, they didn’t really have a set style because it tended to be all over the place. “The only positive to fighting is if anyone tries to mess with you, you can handle it. The money isn’t worth it. Not when there aren’t any guidelines and someone could jump you. Anything could happen.” Jordan knew Ri Ahn was trying to keep it light but that was their concern. That anything could happen, out of Ri Ahn’s control. He could be seriously injured. Or worse. And then what? Money couldn’t fix that.

“Are you okay with not being alone, though? Being around other people? It doesn’t make you uncomfortable, right? Like… even I have moments where I just need to get away and recharge after a while.” Jordan just wanted to make sure they never got Ri Ahn stuck in a social situation if he didn’t want to be around others. “You are being nice. A total softie.” They poked his arm a couple times, smiling. “Jamie and Joon. And I hiiighly doubt he’s a dick if he’s roommates with Joon. How’d you end up meeting?” Since Ri Ahn couldn’t really see them, Jordan rested their eyes when they felt his arm around him, comfortably resting against his shoulder with a faint smile. They could probably easily fall asleep now that their mind wasn’t racing so much with the events of last night, sitting up or not. “It’s not that bad. And the view is always nice, if you know the right places. We can work up to something like that and start simple first.”

He had to admit that Jordan did have the elemento of surprise on their side, always surprising him with their words and actions. “Totally douchebag, what the fuck, those are pictures I don’t want to see” Because tough and biker? Hot as well, douchebag? Not too much. “You should wear it” He replied, immediately changing his mind “Or maybe not, be soft on me” He was already weak for them he wasn’t sure he was ready for that look.  “Nothing has happened though” Maybe this was a topic they would never agree on because it was the only way Ri Ahn knew how to survive.  “But I’ll paint more, there’s this gallery, Dragan Gallery? I somehow met the owner and he said he’d like to see some of my work so who knows, it might work out” But he needed the money to buy more supplies so until then, he would keep fighting.

“I can have a tough image. I just don’t have anything else to back it up except a whole lot of bullshit.” It just made them laugh because they couldn’t picture Ri Ahn being bubbly, and the thought of them trading places was entertaining. “Young adolescent me tried that whole tough look. I should show you pictures. It’s almost embarrassing to look back on now. I was still in the closet and going by my legal name.” Jordan retaliated so fast, poking at Ri Ahn’s arm. “No! Fighting is not good, nor will it ever be. It just so happens that the outcome helped us meet.” They knew he was joking, so they were smiling as they poked at his arm. 

“Pfft. Wiser. Whatever.” Jordan playfully rolled their eyes. “I’m surprised it doesn’t bother you. Since you like to be alone. Or do you like being around others?” They might have gotten that wrong. Maybe Ri Ahn only chose to be alone because it was easier, not because it was what he wanted. “If you say any other nice things about me today, my heart might explode, okay? Spare my heart. I need it.” Jordan leaned against his shoulder, picking at their sandwich and eating small bites that they tore off. “I have a few friends that are dating. You met two of them so far… Ouchhh, did you just throw your friend under the bus?” They smiled, glancing to him and taking a drink of their coffee before leaning back against his shoulder. Did they mention they were clingy? “Single dates could be anything. The classic dinner and a movie. Picnics. Hikes. Picnic hikes.” Jordan giggled. “I don’t know. We can do whatever. But I’ll plan one for us. It’ll be fun.”

“I can’t imagine you tough, you’re too soft” Or maybe they were soft to him, he had never seen them being tough to anyone else so he was open to be surprised if the opportunity came. “Wait, you were going for the tough look? Like, leather jacket, earrings and such? Because I’d definitely like to see those pictures” Ri Ahn had piercings himself and he thought they added to his look, but he honestly didn’t do the whole bad boy look on purpose, he just liked wearing black and riding his friend’s motorcycle whenever he could. “You got to admit there’s a positive side of fighting, there’s also good money that comes from it and it allows me to paint. How else could I use Luna as my muse if it weren’t for fighting?” He asked them, knowing he had a good point there.

“The worst teacher ever,” Jordan chuckled. “You’re not bad at all. I think once you’re around someone enough, you just tend to pick up on each others habits and stuff, you know? We wouldn’t have been hanging out in the first place if there wasn’t some sort of compatibility.” Well… they wouldn’t have been hanging out if Jordan didn’t cross paths with him and constantly bug him, asking him how he was and bringing him back to their place to try and help with the injuries he had at the time. But still. They wouldn’t have continued to see each other unless they wanted to, right? “I don’t think you’ve ever complained? But if you think about it, your fighting is what kinda brought us together.”

Jordan started to shake their head but they ended up laughing. “The kids these days! How dare they. You make it sound like we’re old. I’m only twenty-five.” Which felt old if they compared themselves to someone their age that actually had their shit together. But hey, Jordan wasn’t swimming in college debt, so that was a bonus on their end. “It’s not a lot of pressure, I was just kidding. I just didn’t know if you had any expectations. I can be clingy. Like… just wanting to come over and use you as a pillow, clingy. Talk about our days. Or we wouldn’t even have to say a word.” Jordan carefully balanced their coffee against them to unwrap the sandwich, keeping any mess contained on the wrapper as they tore a bite off. You’re just you, I like you. That meant a lot to Jordan. Because for once, they never tried really hard to get his attention or try to act like someone they weren’t, trying to fit some sort of more desirable image. “That’s probably the nicest thing anyone has ever said to me.” They smiled. “Thank you. I like you for you too. And maybe in time, we could even go on double dates. But single dates first.”

“Does it mean I’m going to get all bubbly? Because I have a tough image to keep, you’re going to ruin my reputation” He didn’t care about what others thought of him so it wasn’t an important deal, and it wasn’t like he would act like he did with Jordan around other people anyways, but it was fun to tease them and point out how bubbly they were, he actually really liked that about them.  “Ha! You should be grateful then, argument it’s over, fighting is good” He was joking, he would try to take it more easy and heck, maybe this would even be a bigger motivation to do well in fights but also with his art. He could dedicate more time to his paintings if that kept Jordan from worrying all day about him. 

“Hey, who are you calling sappy, punk? You probably got it from me instead of learning how to flirt.” Jordan chuckled. Or maybe those two kind of went hand in hand. Because you can’t really be sappy without knowing how to flirt a little. Jordan knew they were a sucker for affection but it really did make them smile and cling more when Ri Ahn put his hand on their head, or put his arms around them, literally anything that meant keeping each other physically close. “Yeah, boyfriend. And that’s why I appreciate you that much more. Because you were patient with me. You’re still patient with me.” Jordan smiled. They could have easily jumped into things with Ri Ahn. But it turns out waiting made it better. It helped Jordan realize that Ri Ahn really liked being around them because he could be, not because he had to be. Or because there was something to be gained. He liked them for them. “Guess you’ll just have to get used to me caring and worrying about you now, trying to keep you out of any trouble.” 

Maybe Jordan had some sort of mood swings, going from self doubt to this sort of cheerful version of themselves. Or maybe it was normal? Ri Ahn had made them feel better in the moment and it was hard not to smile, to be happy in his presence. There was something about the way he was so blunt about being good at sex that made Jordan smile more. “That’s good to know.” They liked to think they were pretty good too, having been with numerous people over the years, including being paid by one. But there was nothing there except a physical one night stand with those people. So, Jordan could relate in that aspect, perhaps. They wanted to find someone, to move on and get attached to someone else, but they never could. Until now. “And I’m the first? I don’t know, seems like a lot of pressure.” They sort of gave his shoulder a little headbutt. “How does it feel? Being around someone.”

“Then you must be a terrible teacher, although I did get you to date me so I guess I’m not too bad?” He was supposed to learn from them but he wasn’t sure if he had actually learned something or not, like, had he done something on purpose? Or was it just the way Jordan made them act? It came naturally but maybe there were things he had started to pick on.  “It’s not like I’m in a rush, so patience doesn’t seem like a big deal” because he was fine with how things were going between them so there was no need to push into anything. “Im getting used to it, haven’t complained lately, have I?” Also granted, he hadn’t fought lately so there was no need for Jordan to take care of him.

“Stoppp,” Jordan whined. “You’re giving me, like… heart palpitations with all this cute. I can’t take it.” They dramatically clutched at their chest before burying their face into his shoulder, laughing. This wasn’t a side of Ri Ahn they expected to see. But having it? Their heart really did feel full. “But after last night? I shouldn’t have. I’m not really the type to leave without saying anything, anyway. And I don’t want my boyfriend to ever think he’s being abandoned. Because I’m not going anywhere.” Jordan went right back into hiding against Ri Ahn’s shoulder, hiding their smile. “What did I do to deserve you? Where have you been all of my life? Huh?” They picked their head up with a grin. The cute that he wanted to wake up to. What in the actual fuck, right?

“Okay, here…” Jordan turned around and compared the coffees briefly, trying to figure out which one they drank from less, and passed it off to Ri Ahn. “I trusted myself to make it this far while balancing everything. I don’t trust myself any further. Now, shoooo!” They chuckled, giving his ass a little playful smack to send him back to bed. Once they grabbed the bag with the breakfast sandwiches and the other coffee, they did their best to get settled beside him without spilling any coffee, trying to pull the blanket up a bit in the process. “You’ve never really done this before?” Jordan took a sip of their coffee, getting the sandwiches out and passing one to him. “Like, been in a relationship before?”

“Heart palpitations? Oh for fuck’s sake, sappiness is contagious” Ri Ahn chuckled because one second he thought he was being the most cheesy of all but then Jordan came and said those things that made him feel all warm and shit. But it was cute how they hid against his shoulder, his hand immediately going to their head, keeping him close. “Shit, boyfriend” He repeated their words, since it was kind of amusing to him to be called like that. “I was kind of waiting for you to decide if you wanted more though, remember? Like, I fucking behaved around you, although that was the past weeks, all of your life? Probably getting in troubles with no one to worry about me” He smirked because even when he didn’t like that he was starting to get used to them worrying about him.

He had a point, and Jordan knew it. Things weren’t always going to be perfect. They would both have their off days and they were bound to disagree on things later on. That was just human nature. So, Jordan nodded. Truly listened and stopped overthinking, taking Ri Ahn’s words for exactly what they were. And they smiled. Knowing that Ri Ahn didn’t have a good upbringing, Jordan felt like he needed someone better than them. Someone that didn’t question everything, and thus make him question everything in return. Because that was the last thing they wanted, was for Ri Ahn to think Jordan saw him in any kind of negative way when it really only boiled down to Jordan’s own insecurities and nothing more.

“All of those weeks ago when we met, I never would have thought this is where we would be. Being suckers for each other. And all this sappiness.” Jordan tried to tease by rolling their eyes but they were smiling the entire time, their heart pretty much melted by his words. “I’m sorry for leaving without saying anything. I didn’t think about how that would look from your perspective. I just wanted to try and do something cute for you to wake up to.” They reached up and swept some of Ri Ahn’s hair with a finger. “Joke’s on me because I came back to something even cuter. You and your bedhead.” Jordan leaned in to kiss him, then hovered to kiss him again with a smirk. “I’ll be selfish with the kisses, if that’s okay. And no more surprise absences. I promise.” Taking his hands, Jordan let them sway between them. “I’m all yours for the day. Breakfast in bed?”

“You ruined me and turned me into a fucking sappy mess” He complained yet it was obvious in his tone that he wasn’t being serious, he was just teasing because he actually felt very happy and content, despite knowing he was acting like he had never imagined he would. Because Ri Ahn was tough, cold, a loner, yet here he was, freaking out because Jordan might dump him, wanting to be around them all the time, just wanting them close and doing whatever he could to make them smile. God he was a sappy mess indeed, a cheesy fucker like the ones he used to make fun of before meeting Jordan.

Jordan hummed against him, resting their eyes. They had to be selfish for a moment because they appreciated the warmth, but they’d also forgotten how much they already missed Ri Ahn’s embrace. Like they were the perfect fit for each other and he knew the right amount of pressure to put into the hug. “I should have… but breakfast…” Jordan mumbled before finally peeling themselves away from him to talk. What were they thinking? Well, now they were thinking that it wasn’t worth bringing any of it up. But Ri Ahn wasn’t holding anything back, so it was only fair to be honest in return. “I feel safe with you.” Considering when they were at the place where his fights took place, Jordan felt terrified until Ri Ahn was right beside them, holding their hand. And when Eric pulled them off to the side, all Jordan could do was search the crowd for Ri Ahn. Didn’t that say something? 

“I just… I’m worried this is too good to be true. That if I don’t end up hurt, you will. Or vice versa. I don’t know.” Jordan slowly took their arms back, pulling at the hoodie’s sleeves. “I want you to be happy. I know this is just getting started, but I’m afraid you’ll… I don’t know, that you’ll get bored.” They really hated that their ex warped so much of their thoughts, and that it was still taking a toll on Jordan years later. It was hard not to second guess things. Overthink things. Then on top of that, they were genuinely concerned for Ri Ahn’s well-being. “I don’t feel like I’m enough. And I’m not just saying that to say it. I mean… I really want you to be happy. Truly happy. And I don’t know if I’m it, but I wanna be. I wanna be selfish. I want you.” Which was ridiculous to say, wasn’t it? Because technically, they had already agreed they were together. “You make me happy. Just the way you are.”

Being physical with someone else didn’t come easily to Ri Ahn, but as he wrapped his arms around them he realized that caressing their head and just keeping them close, was the most natural action to make. It was a good feeling, to know they felt safe with him, but did they feel safe from him? It wasn’t the same and Ri Ahn wasn’t sure if he should insist further in the subject. After all, he didn’t want to scare them but he also didn’t want to keep anything from them, just how he expected for them not to keep anything from him.