In human form, a deity of creation, transformation, and chaos, alongside other things like liminality and the wild. Through art and writing, I communicate my nature and creation. Here on tumblr is where I sometimes scream into the void about anything and everything from random thoughts to the plights of the world. I may also promote my creation on occasion.
I am also a therian and fictionkin. See the list in my carrd for an extensive summary of what I am. All alterhumans/nonhumans and fictionkin are accepted on my blog, just don't bring syscourse here. I don't have very specific DNI but I block at my own discretion.
My tags
mzoyagon.tumblr.com/tagged/mzoyart - My art tag.
mzoyagon.tumblr.com/tagged/mzoyaverse - My AU tag.
mzoyagon.tumblr.com/tagged/mzoey%20the%20conspiracy%20theorist - My theory tag.
mzoyagon.tumblr.com/tagged/mzoyagon's%20dragon%20hoard - I'm a dragon. This is my hoard.
https://mzoyagon.tumblr.com/tagged/uzoey - I kiss Uzi Doorman from Murder Drones.
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I'm happy to be a wolf that can use technology, I'm really grateful for it actually.
Bit of a long ramble below cut, it's mainly positive :)
If you don't know, I have moderate-severe dissociative amnesia. As of right now, my day to day memory is extremely poor, I forget things typically within 1-3 hours of them happening or at it's worse, I have complete blackouts that last for 5-7 hours up to the entire day.
Being able to record, photograph and write my life has helped me explore so much more comfortably because I'm actually able to SEE what I was doing and feeling. I may forget the memory but having media of the past helps me restore keyparts of the memory or to observe my feelings at least.
Yesterday I went outside in gear and just played around and even had a few mini shifts. I don't fully remember it now but before playing, I did set up my phone to record and I'm so glad I did. I could see myself being hesitant to crouch, then scared to place my paws on the grass and dirt but eventually doing it. Seeing myself walk on it slowly and getting used to the bumpy terrain and how hard it was. Then in later clips, I saw myself enjoying the wind and falling leaves and even almost chasing after them. I don't remember what I felt but being able to see it at least makes me feel happy.
I have a deep worry that me recording, photographing or writing every little experience of my life comes off as disingenuous because of how others treat those who post "their entire life" online. And I do not blame them as some people are very disingenuous when doing so. But being able to record my alterhuman experiences specifically helped me release some of that fear. I was able to catch a glimpse of me being myself without care and I value that so much. What I value even more, is potentially helping someone, anyone, else feel less alone in their experiences.
A part of the reason why I don't use labels is because I often can't remember what I feel like most days or can't remember instances that would help me decide if the label would fit me. I really feel like if things keep looking up here, I can maybe choose a more concrete label for myself within this community.
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i understand (on paper) why companies are anti-piracy but its funny when random individuals are also strongly anti-piracy. like how does it negatively affect your life if someone you know downloads a cracked torrent of sims 4. you dont work for EA. EA isnt gonna pay you for this. you lose nothing. its fine. chill out.
something I really enjoy is that I've now seen like 4 or 5 variations of roughly this same video, all slightly different in their angles and timing while obviously being the exact same bunny and room, implying that this is a consistent and frequent behavior for this bunny instead of just a funny thing it did once that got caught on camera. I wish I could have as much raw unfiltered enthusiasm for anything as this little rabbit has for its dinnertime
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there’s a notion I’ve seen people spread that I don’t like when it comes to deltarune human designs ( I don’t think it’s wrong to see the monsters as white bc I sure do for a few of them ). but when people hc characters as black ( say specifically Noelle + berdly ) people jump to “oh! Well Noelle can’t be black, she’s a corny preppy rich girl!” “Berdly can’t be black, he’s and annoying nerd.” What makes you think black people cant act like this 😭
Do you think being rich and living in the suburbs + being nerdy and corny is white exclusive traits 😭 do you think being silly or geeky or dainty and soft are traits black people cant have 😭 like it really shows that people think of certain personalities as “white default” and if a black person acts that way its unrealistic . I think you need to unpack what you think a black person should behave like for you to think this way 😭😭😭😭
if you could go back in time to when you first took on this project and give yourself advice, what would it be? :)
Hmm. "Pace yourself" is one of them. This is actually hard work lmao, I never anticipated this page getting as big as it did. Sometimes I feel really bad about not writing lessons or answering asks as fast as I did when I started but tbh... I have a life, this takes up a lot of it, and I balance a lot on here as it is, so.
I'd tell myself that I'd end up making friends and community who cared, so it'll be okay. As hard as it can be that there are people who will be cruel, callous, or purposely hate filled, there are also gonna be a lot of people that you'll meet that will appreciate what you do, some that will become your peers. And it's not like I didn't think that, but seeing people whose blogs I admired and wanted to be around, who actually fuck with me now is pretty nice, actually!
Hm... I'd tell myself that "you aren't all you have to give". I still tell myself that, it's something I've had to work on my whole life, fr. That I still have value even if I had nothing to offer, that I don't owe anyone labor in exchange for being treated like I belong. That people should try as hard for me as I am demanded to try for them. Part of that is the Strong Black Woman Experience though, I got it from my childhood and it's been a work in progress. Knowing these things objectively, and then actually applying them is hard!
I don't know if I'd have anything else. Tbh, most of what I know now, I knew back then. Like dealing with racism, while I've dealt with it far more often and had to grow a little harder to it, resilience was already a requirement so 🤷🏾♀️ thanks for asking!
Oh! I meant to add this part yesterday, but in addition: everything you say will become a "you love pancakes? So you must hate waffles" situation. It is going to annoy you deeply but it's the internet. It doesn't matter if you said what you said, if you didn't address every single potential of human thought into one reply (if you just say what you're thinking as an individual thought, or you only answer what you're being asked and that's all) people will presume bad or ignorant intent.
Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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now that the Trans Infighting has reached a point where its not only transandrophobia, exorsexism, and intersexism being levied constantly in the name of "fighting transmisogyny," but also actual constant fucking TRANSMISOGYNY being levied in the name of "FIGHTING TRANSMISOGYNY," can we all take a moment to say "oh my god june I'm so sorry you were right this is just alt right fucks perpetrating infighting and using it as an excuse to hurt trans people online"
