c'est la vie

it all started with closed eyes and a feeling in my gut telling me  i need to keep them shut the whole time because they opened even for a second and i saw your lips they’d suck me in like black holes when they bend light and it was then i realized you were not my world you were my universe

sometimes when i look up i see stars that cut through the sky and fade quickly into nothingness and i pray that you aren’t as fleeting because when we’re lying in roads i get the same feeling that gravity will just turn off and i’ll fall endlessly  into something much larger than i am and i wonder if that’s what it feels like to die and if i’ll ever understand god in my lifespan because i want to see god i want to know what god feels like