My Words

She had encountered her friend a few minutes ago: he was taking out the trash, she saw it. And she did the same right after. Now, she stood before his body, which was torn in half on the ground, surrounded with blood. As her face grew paler at the scene, she reached for her communicator.

“Titans, Cafeteria, now.” Her voice cracked at the next sentence, already running. “Cyborg is dead.”

“What?!” Beast Boy’s shock echoed through the device.

In a matter of minutes, the titans gathered around a table in the cafeteria of their spaceship. And checking the vital signs, they noticed that Cyborg was not the only one.

Starfire was dead too.

“That can’t be.” Robin said. “Where was Cy?! Did you see anyone else?” He asked Raven.

“Admin. And no, I didn’t see anyone.”

Raven heard a female voice. “Convenient. Maybe she killed him? Impostors can self report.”

Terra.

She turned her head towards her, anger rising. “What are you talking about, I had just fixed the lights, I did not-”

“Kidding!” Terra said, defending herself. “We just gotta suspect everyone. But seriously now, I think Rae is innocent. I saw her take the trash away.”

Raven was ready to burst but then stopped mid-way to process what she had just heard. Still, a glare stayed on her eyes. “Oh. Thank you? I guess.” Then, she remembered. “But it’s Ra-ven. Two syllables, please.”

“Right! Sorry.” The blonde one said, smiling shyly. “Let’s keep going then, for now.”

Robin nodded. “Yeah. We need to get this ship running. Let’s keep the rhythm and maybe we can make it. Titans, go!”

As soon as the meeting was over, Raven went out of the room and looked at her list of tasks. The next one was at the reactor, on the other side of the ship. Carefully, she made her way there.

But one thing stuck in her mind: Terra had defended her. And she had mixed feelings about it, for sure; but for now, Terra seemed fine. Had to give the girl the benefit of the doubt, after all.

As she went through the hallway, her vision interrupted her thoughts as it peaked someone at the Medical Bay: Beast Boy. He was doing his body scan. Innocent. Good.

The girl finally arrived at the reactor and, at the same time, a sigh went out of her lungs as soon as she noticed she had to do the memory panel. That usually took a long time to finish and she only hoped that no one would call an emergency meeting while she was on it. Or, even, find a dead body. That thing was surprisingly stressful.

It seemed simple: top-right, mid-right. Top-right, mid-right, center. While she was at the forth step of her task, she saw a yellow form joining her. Adrenaline. Instinct made her step away from the panel and go outside the reactor; and, as soon as she did, she noticed Terra stayed there for a while, facing the wall. Raven could just leave her there. But she had to watch this. She had to check if she could complete a task.

Connect. The damn. Wires.

And then, something went noticed by her eyes, above her head:

The task completion bar moved.

Could she trust this? It could be anyone else completing something around the ship. Before she could think any longer, Terra ran from the reactor, bumped into Raven and went towards the hallway that led to the Med Bay.

Maybe she was wrong about Terra. Maybe she was, indeed, innocent. Still, she had her suspicion.

Raven entered the reactor once more. Finishing turning it on, she left and went to the cafeteria, only to find Terra close to a wall and Beast Boy standing still, next to the emergency button. Maybe he had the same idea and wanted to see if their friend could complete a task, she figured. Looking at her list again, the girl noticed there was a missing one, at Navigation room. The task bar was close to a full green. If she completed this, they’d win, probably.

Unfortunately, the impostor seemed to read her thoughts; since, before she could reach the doors to go out of the Cafeteria, a loud emergency alarm was heard. Reactor meltdown. Without a second thought, she ran, anxiety louder than the alarm itself.

Raven arrived at the reactor, followed by Beast Boy. After a few seconds, Terra arrived with them. But while the issue was being fixed, one thing crossed her mind: where was Robin? Now that she thought about it, she hadn’t seen him for quite a while now. Was he the impostor? Or worse:

Was he dead?

The next sequence of events happened too fast. The three of them left the reactor. Raven wanted to call an emergency meeting to check on Robin. The Cafeteria was close. Before she could cross the doors, they closed, leaving the trio tapped. She managed to get a glimpse of a single blow coming from behind, followed by a disgusting noise. That noise was her, being torn in two. Terra had just killed her.

And everything went black.

-

“Duude!” Beast Boy exclaimed, taking his earphones out. “I can’t believe it was you! Great Job!”

Every one around the table put their phones down, while Terra smiled at everyone and began to describe her take on the last few moments, laughing.

“I’m glad you liked it. Man, that was close! I was in kill cooldown after killing Robin and I knew you guys were going for the emergency button.”

“Friend Terra, that was very clever! Shame that you killed me so soon, but I quite enjoyed being a ghostly game figure. I could go from one end to the other without being bothered with barriers.”

“You got a point, Star.” Cyborg said, laughing as well. “But being dead sucks, man. Not being able to fix sabotages really stressed me out. You guys are slow, you almost lost at the first reactor one! I’s dead but screaming inside ‘Man, just fix the damn thing!’”

Everyone laughed and kept talking about different moments. They seemed to have found the game quite fun. Except for Raven, who stayed serious in her chair, processing what had just happened. She should’ve sensed Terra was lying. But all she managed to capture from everyone was that usual mixture of feelings they went through everytime they played a game.

She then noticed, in fact, that Terra did not lie. They had only one meeting and she only said that Raven herself was innocent. Which was true.

But mostly: why was she so emotionally invested in this?

As expected, her lack of reaction did not go unnoticed. Beast Boy caught her in the corner of his eye, since they were side by side and, instead of speaking out loud, he leaned in and whispered.

“Rae?”

That made her jump. “What?”

“You ok? You’re quiet. And sorta pale.”

Raven glanced at him. “And? I’m always quiet and pale.”

“I know, but this time you look worried.”

In fact, she was. The context of the game and the choice of who was the first impostor brought her a weird feeling. She was suspicious of Terra in real life already. Trusting her for a second there, only to be betrayed and murdered, made her feel like it was some kind of a cruel foreshadowing.

“Friend Raven, are you alright?” Star asked, without the same discretion as Garfield.

That made Terra’s eyes rest on her. The girl wore a rather innocent smile. “What did you think, Raven? That game rocks.” A pause. “Right?”

“Indeed.” She replied in monotone. “It must’ve been fun joining a crew just to betray and kill everyone.” A pause. And a small smile; irony painted all over it. “Right? Great job, by the way.”

Terra’s stomach twisted. And Raven felt that coming from her, perfectly.

“Girl, chill.” Terra answered, trying to keep the smile on and, this time, laughing a bit. “It was just a game. Now who’s up for a second round?”

The team agreed. Raven didn’t say anything. Unlocking his phone, Beast Boy leaned in once more, speaking quietly.

“She’s right. You know it’s just a game. Don’t you?”

Raven did the same as him and joined the virtual game room.

“Sure.” She said, glaring at Terra.

Just a game.

.......................................................

The four titans stared at Raven, stunned. Everyone except for Best Boy, who was smiling like he knew some big secret.

"Oh, I know exactly what's going on here..." He moved his index finger up and down, pointing it at her. "I told you I wanted you to forget and you're pretending you really forgot to teach me a lesson." He started to clap in a slow rhythm. "Well played, Rae, well played. But you're not gonna fool this guy."

Raven glared at him, but at the same time, there was doubt in her eyes. "What are you talking about? I really have no idea-"

"Don't try to trick me." He said, angrier this time. "I don't need you to teach me anything, I've already told you, I'm sorry."

Raven stared at him, without a word.

"Still, I do not understand..." Starfire held her hands on her chest, worried. "Friend Raven, what is the last thing you remember?"

"I... Was at the temple with Azarath's monks. We were meditating and... I ended up here. I thought it was a part of the exercise..."

The Azarath's monks were the ones who actually raised Raven. It was there where she learned how to meditate and control her powers, as well as fighting against her demoniac father's influence, Trigon.

"Oh man..." Cyborg slapped his own forehead, while he read Raven's brain waves, on his machine screen.

"Cyborg...?" Robin raised an eyebrow; and his friend shook his head.

"Man, man, no... Raven's brain waves usually are complex, because of all her training and life experience. But now, they're way too simple."

"Wait... How much time did she lose?"

The half-robot sighed. "More than 10 years..."

"WHAT?!" They shouted at the same time. Beast Boy erased the smile of his face and actually began to get worried as well. If what Cyborg said was true, they had a big trouble in front of them.

"This can't be right..." The green boy covered his face with his hands. "Duude, this can't be right..."

"Is it serious?"

Hearing those words, they looked at their owner, who was still sitting on the bed. "I mean... Did I really forget you? What am I? Who are you?"

Beast Boy was looking at her, thinking about how bad that actually was; but as soon as he came back to his senses, he noticed his friends looking at him, crossing their arms, like he needed to do something. Robin looked at Raven and then at him, quickly.

He started to rub the back of his neck and look at the opposite direction; but Starfire kicked his butt and he was forced to took a step towards Raven.

He looked back at them. Someone had to tell Raven what she lost. And seeing he was the chosen one to do the job, since he had said those things against her earlier, he sighed and put a hand on her shoulder.

"Listen, uh... I'm just gonna explain your... Life, ok? Heck, ok... You're a teen titan, part of our team of... Heroes. We protect the city against really bad villains and... Let's say Not-So-Bad ones. We met a few years ago." He gestured to Cyborg. "This is Cyborg, but I call him Cyb. He suffered an accident and had his lost body parts replaced by robotic ones. He's fun and was the one who came up with our whole cool tech stuff." At this point, Cyborg smiled from ear to ear and gave a thumb up. "This is Starfire. She is the alien that brought us together. She's kind, but can really kick a butt when needed." Starfire closed her eyes and smiled, waving at her. "This head hog here is Robin. He's like our leader; and he's a great one. We can always count on him. All I know is that he lived with that guy, Batman, for a while and learned how to fight."

Robin's eyes formed a thin line as he lowered his head and did the quote marks with his fingers. "'That guy, Batman' actually raised me."

"Dude, you never talk about yourself, that's not my fault." He interrupted Robin. "AND I'm Beast Boy. When I was a kid, I got sick, and my parents, who were scientists, came up with a injection to cure me. But that changed my DNA in a really weird way and now I can turn into any animal species on earth.

"Well... And you... You can do those cool stuff with force fields and meditation. But mostly, you're our friend." He smiled, sadly. "And you mean a lot to us."

She stared at him. Then, after a while, she raised an eyebrow. "You're not like... My boyfriend, right?"

"What?!" He waved his hands in front of her in denial. "No, no, I'm not..." Suddenly, he stopped and realized something. "Waait... What's that supposed to mean?!"

"I guess it's time to show Raven the house huh?" Cyborg interrupted them, putting both hands on Raven's shoulders. "Can you walk?"

She nodded silently and stood up, with Cyborg's help. Then, he guided her, slowly, to the exit door and down the hallways.

.....................................................

Starfire took the villain to the police and flew as fast as she could to see how Raven was. As soon as she got to the T tower, she went to the medical wing; where her friend was being helped. All she hoped was that everything would turn out to be fine.

"Starfire..." Robin said when she arrived, with sad eyes. Cyborg was typing and cursing at his machine, while Beast Boy sat down on a chair, away from the bed where Raven lay unconscious.

The girl walked in. She was hoping to find her friend floating, healing herself; but instead she found Raven actually lying on the bed, not moving; and felt a weigh inside her chest when she paid attention to each one of her friends' faces.

She managed to speak. "Friends... What is wrong? Why is she so...?"

"The voltage was too high." Cyborg's voice echoed shakily. "She... She's..."

"In a coma." Robin finished, angry.

Starfire felt shock running inside her. She walked towards her friend and sat on a chair close to her bed. It was when she decided to hold Raven's hand and rub her thumb against it that she broke down.

"It's not forever, Star." Cyborg tried to comfort her, although he was really sad too. "She will certainly wake up within a few days."

Robin put his hand on her shoulder; and she immediately stood up to hug him.

"She will be fine." He said. "You know Raven. She's tough."

"Yeah..." Beast Boy said quietly, catching the others' attention. He had been sitting on that chair, looking at a wall since they got there. And he was still looking at it.

"BB, c'mon..."

"C'mon, what?!" He answered his half-robot friend, standing up and looking at his friends. "We had a fight! If something worse happens to her, if we never get the chance to see the Raven we know again, I'll never be able to apologize! I... I'll never..."

"What happened happened, Beast Boy." Robin said. "There's nothing to do about it. It was a fight, okay. But if you keep going back and blaming yourself, you won't be able to think about what's yet to come."

Cyborg's lips curved down. "Wow, man, I never knew you could be so profound... You know. For someone in pantyhose..."

Starfire giggled, while Robin glared at his friend.

"Going back to the real important stuff." He said, finally. "What I'm saying is true, you must- oh, Star, please stop laughing, I'm trying to make a point here."

"But, Robin... It wasn't me."

The four of them froze where they were; and turned around to where their unconscious friend was. Instead of finding her lying down, they saw what made their jaws drop: Raven was sitting upright, watching the whole scene. And actually laughing at it.

When she saw the confused faces staring back at her, she stopped laughing.

"What's wrong?"

"RAVEN!" They shouted and ran to hug her, all at once.

"Wait, what are you doing?! Get off me!"

Beast Boy shook his head, hugging her trunk. "Never! I'm sorry Rae, I'm really really really sorry!"

"For what? Now would you- just- GET OFF!"

The titans heard what she said and let go of the hug right away. There was a sudden movement of the ground they stood, which was covered with black energy.

"Friend Raven, please, calm down. Your strong emotions are taking control of your powers."

Their teammate narrowed her eyes, and her voice turned into her usual monotone. "What do you mean...?"

Beast Boy cleared his throat. "Look, Rae, I know you're mad at me, but I'm really sorry! There's no need-"

"Sorry for what?"

"Well... For being rude."

She looked confused. "When? I... I don't even..."

"Dude, look, I'm already apologizing, isn't that enough? C'mon, do-"

"Beast Boy..." Robin interrupted him.

"Don't you know how h-"

"Beast Boy!"

"What?!"

That was when he actually looked at Raven's face, who was clearly confused about that whole situation. Did they do something wrong? Of course, she wasn't too into hugs and this kind of thing, but the way she responded to that was odd. They waited a while, exchanging looks, until she broke the silence.