The story behind the mask

Missing you is the worst, because not only do I lose my light in the dark but also my best friend. It’s scary how much I’ve started to care for you. Sometimes I wish that you didn’t affect me so much, but then I remember that if you didn’t I probably wouldn’t be here right now. I miss all your friendly “I love you”’s and the hugs we rarely give one another. I miss hearing your voice. I miss your constant presence. I just miss you so much and I wish you we’re here

me right now

you do not get to sweep me off under your rug kept in the dark  stowed away with all your dust when you have had your fill -  when you have sucked me swollen - your name written in purple bruises from my neck to my chest, unapologetic you do not get to tell me i had this coming, you do not get to be angry i got hurt and had this coming,  i wanted, i waned, i warned:  i am guilty of feeling  BUT YOU KISSED ME FIRST (do you even remember the first time your lips crept in the dark to mine? that night i felt the loveliest) i was not the first but you were warned and yet you tell me i had this coming NO, YOU DO NOT GET TO SWEEP ME OFF UNDER YOUR RUG NOT WHEN I WAS THE ONE WHO GOT HURT THE MOST  YOU DO NOT GET TO TELL ME I KNEW I SHOULD HAVE KNOWN YOU DO NOT GET TO STOP ME FROM WRITING YOU EVERY CRUELTY EVERY ACHE IN THIS POEM (as you unclasped the hook and let me sit in between your thighs - one hand tracing the curve of my waist - the other dancing up and down my spine you said: you are the loveliest tonight) i did not think it was only for the night

I did not leave, you just did not notice me. But how could you ever notice me if you’re always looking at someone else?