You can always send me messages, I'm open for a chat about our boys <3 :)
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Stranger Things

#extradirty

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Misplaced Lens Cap

Origami Around
Xuebing Du
wallacepolsom
Sade Olutola

Andulka


shark vs the universe
he wasn't even looking at me and he found me
PUT YOUR BEARD IN MY MOUTH

izzy's playlists!
h

JVL
occasionally subtle
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@myhusbandscoffee
You can always send me messages, I'm open for a chat about our boys <3 :)

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David did not tell Yuna what he saw at the cottage. But, he did come home visibly upset so he had to tell her something.
"Is Shane okay?" Was Yuna's first question.
"Yes," David was quick to reassure her. "He's fine. He's great."
"David," Yuna said worriedly, hand on his bicep. "Is Shane okay?"
"He really is. I promise, sweetheart. I would tell you if he wasn't," David promised her because he would. "But I - he was - he's probably going to be headed over here soon."
"Why?" Yuna started to get more worried, despite her husband's reassurances. "David, what happened? Did you two fight?"
David did interrupt his silent retreat but Yuna couldn't imagine Shane getting into a fight with his father over that.
"No," David caught her eyes. "Do you trust me?"
"Of course."
"Then please don't ask. I saw something I shouldn't have and I - I want it to be Shane's choice if he tells us. I promise you he's safe. We didn't fight. He's - he might be upset with me, but he's okay."
Yuna searched his face for another moment before she slowly nodded.
She had an idea of what David might have seen.
She had considered that Shane's 'silent retreat' might not be the complete truth. She also recognized how upset her husband was at unintentionally learning something about their boy that he wasn't ready to share.
"Okay," Yuna pulled him in for a hug. "I'll make some tea."
"I feel so horrible."
"Shane loves you, he'll understand," Yuna said.
"I hope so," David pulled back. "I can make the tea. Shane will probably want some if he comes over."
He used to make Shane hot chocolate after nightmares, or doctor visits, or difficult practices. When he was a teenager, he started asking for tea instead.
Yuna, sensing David needed something to do, said, "use the new one my aunt sent us. It takes a little longer but I think Shane will like it."
~*~*~
"So, what did you see," Yuna asked her husband as they watched their son and his boyfriend, Ilya Rozanov, drive away.
"I wondered how long it would take for you to ask," David smiled.
"Hush you," Yuna glared. "Like you wouldn't be curious. Unless, god, did you walk in on-"
"No," David stopped her. "They were just walking up from the dock. I would have left but when I noticed it was Rozanov - or Ilya, I mean - I was just frozen there."
"Then how did you know they were, you know, together?"
"Well they kissed on the porch," David winced. "And Ilya..."
"Ilya what?"
"He, uh, had his hand on Shane's…bottom."
Yuna and David stared at each other for a few seconds before Yuna couldn't take it anymore, smile spreading across her face and burst out laughing, hand gripping her husband’s shirt to hold herself up.
"I'm sorry, I'm sorry," Yuna laughed out.
"Yuna!" David admonished but he was laughing too. He reached out to steady her. "It's not funny!"
"When you put it that - that way!" Yuna tried to gather herself. "Ilya Rozanov. Ilya Rozanov. I can't believe it."
"He's a sweet kid," David was still smiling, thinking about Ilya standing awkwardly by his son, happily eating pasta, saying he'd leave the team that drafted him for their Shane.
Yuna softened. "He really is. He looks so much younger in person."
"Well," David wrapped an arm around her waist. "I think he might be ours now."
stop asking me about having kids, i’ve already had to gentle parent all of my ex boyfriends into coming out
Shane with a lily tattoo on his heart!!!!!! He's been driving me insane!!!!
Also think about Ilya holding Shane's tit lily

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Ilya with his loon tattoo to go with my Shane with his lily!!!!
threads users confirm Hudson Williams is indeed cooking when it comes to his fighting technique (x)
#subtle 👀
triptych of pain
ilya as yuna’s assistant: ficlet !
that discovers she has a beautiful son and is like😍😍
—
The move from Boston to Ottawa had been almost as stressful as his first immigration process. It was less urgent and emotionally-driven, just a need to get away from the same life, everyday.
Two months before Ilya’s move, he started selling small things that he didn’t plan on bringing with him for extra cash when he eventually no longer had a job. He applied and applied to just about any position that guaranteed a livable income—preferably above forty-grand year.
Ilya, with the help of Svetlana, found a one-bedroom, one bathroom apartment with in-unit laundry that’s in a safe neighbourhood. The reviews from past tenants are mostly positive, save for the few complaints of minor problems. He doesn’t have much room to be picky.
The first month went by quickly with no replies on his applications. Panic settles in soon after that. How can he move countries without a solid plan? He’s already been approved for a work visa in Canada, can he just cancel that? But he’s already told his manager here in Boston that he is for sure leaving…
For a week, he doesn’t settle. Ilya checks his inbox religiously on every break, between meals, after he showers, whenever he can.
Just over two weeks before his one-way ticket to Ottawa, an email from Hollander Enterprises lights up Ilya’s phone screen.
Mr. Rozanov,
After receiving your resume and letter, CEO Yuna Hollander would like to take a step forward with the hiring process.
Hollander Enterprises understands that you are not currently living and working in Canada. Mrs. Hollander is willing to conduct an over-the-phone interview to see if you’re the right fit for this position.
Please email her temporary assistant to confirm a date and time for the interview to take place.
…
Ilya could hardly believe his luck. The application had been a last-ditch effort when he realized that none of the other jobs that he went out of his way to look for were interested. Being a personal assistant surely is not the job he’d hoped for, but money is money.
A day later, Ilya is nervously pacing his bare living room. The couches and TV had been sold, leaving him with carpeted emptiness to fill.
He awaits for the clock to hit three in the afternoon. Then, Yuna would be free from her busy schedule for twenty minutes, and thankfully not a lunch break.
His phone buzzes urgently in his hand at three on the dot. Ilya swallows roughly, pressing the green accept button with a shaky thumb.
“Hello?” he utters, squeezing his eyes shut and cursing his accent.
“This is Ilya Rozanov?” a male voice asks robotically.
Of course Yuna Hollander herself wouldn’t be the one to call him. “Yes. Um— This is him.”
“Perfect. I’ll transfer you to Mrs. Hollander now, you’ll be on hold for a moment.”
“Alri—” Ilya doesn’t finish his reply before irritating music plays quietly from his phone. He sighs and leans against his kitchen counter.
The line clicks. “Hello, this is Yuna Hollander. And you are Ilya Rozanov?”
Ilya straightens up so fast that his knees ache. “Hi! Yes, yes this is Ilya.” He clenches his jaw and knocks his head back on a cabinet. Stupid, she already knows who you are.
Mrs. Hollander chuckles. “I’m sorry that we don’t have as much time as I’d have liked—my schedule has been so hectic lately!”
“Oh, that is completely fine—”
“So, I’ll keep the questions simple and not as loaded as I usually prepare.”
The interview is normal after that. Not nearly as formal as Ilya had anticipated it being. He discovers that Yuna Hollander herself is an immigrant that struggles in her day-to-day despite being a powerful woman. He finds this out, of course, after apologizing profusely for not understanding every single word that left her mouth, or not being able to answer each question as eloquently as he could in Russian.
He confesses that they were the only company to reach out to him with a promising offer. She tells him that they try to look for people that are in need of a place to start as well as qualified.
Twenty-two minutes fly by. Mrs. Hollander wraps up the call after that. “It was lovely speaking with you, Ilya. I’m positive that you’ll succeed through the pool of applicants and be hired. The process for this position goes quickly, though, so another email should be sent out within the next two days.”
“Thank you for the opportunity, Mrs. Hollander.”
She laughs. “You’re very welcome, Ilya! Have a nice day.”
“You as well.”
Fast forward four weeks, and Ilya is slowly but surely furnishing his new apartment in Ottawa. He’s already went in for an in-person meeting with Mrs. Hollander and set a start date for his second week in the new city.
Transferring banks and getting his account balance converted into Canadian had been a nightmare that he hadn’t even thought about dealing with, but it’s all well and handled now.
His neighbours are nice and respectful. They honour the designated quiet hours and keep the building clean. Ilya smokes out on his balcony and away from the residents that live on either side of him when they’re taking advantage of their space.
The dress code as CEO Yuna Hollander’s personal assistant is formal. Although she had informed Ilya that slacks and a button-down will do for everyday wear, occasionally a tie if an event requires one.
His first day consists of a tour of the facility and a rundown from Mrs. Hollander’s temporary assistant, Jessica, of what his responsibilities will look like.
In short, he handles the CEO’s schedule, calls, organizing meetings, seeing clients before her, and the occasional off-site errand if she’s too busy to run it herself. His day, nine times out of ten, is eight hours sat at a desk just outside of Mrs. Hollander’s office, with paid overtime that he sees a lot.
After a month, Ilya grows comfortable in his new job, actually enjoys himself here, in Ottawa.
On days where, for someone who owns and runs a company, it’s slow, Ilya prefers to sit on the couch in Yuna’s (she insisted that Ilya calls her that) office and work from his laptop. The door is kept open so he’s able to hear the phone and see if anyone approaches his desk.
Yuna Hollander is a wonderful person to talk to. She’s passionate of her work, the charity that H.E. is associated with, doesn’t judge when Ilya struggles with his English, instead helps him find the words, and speaks of her husband and son as they’re her pride and joy.
It’s refreshing to see someone in such high power who cares.
One day, as Ilya is packing up to go home for the night, his phone vibrates in his pocket with a call. He pauses his task and fishes it out of his pocket.
It’s Yuna. Ilya’s eyebrows pinch together. She never calls my personal phone unless it’s urgent.
“Yuna? What is wrong?”
“Ilya! Sorry that I called your phone and not your desk, I wasn’t sure if you’d gone home already,” she says apologetically.
“I was just about to leave in the next ten minutes. What do you need me to do?” He wracks his brain for anything that he could’ve missed but he comes up with nothing.
“I’m caught up in a meeting in Montreal and I’ll be needing to stay overnight—” Yuna starts.
Ilya sits down in his chair and goes to turn his monitor back on. “You need me to book for one night at your usual hotel?”
“Oh, no, Ilya I can do that myself don’t worry!” She laughs. “No, I forgot my laptop in my office this morning before I left. I don’t want it sitting there overnight, so I’ll need you to bring it to my house for me, if that’s not an issue?”
A beat passes and Ilya blinks slowly. “To your home?”
“Yes. I’ve already called my son and he’ll be home to take it from you at the door.”
He’s been here for all of five months now and has managed to save up enough money for a decent car that doesn’t quit on him every other week. He’s been here for five months, and this is the first time Yuna has asked him to go to her house. It feels too close to mixing her work life and home life.
Ilya bites his lip. “Okay. I can do that.”
“Thank you so much, Ilya! I’ll text you my address and you can head over there as soon as possible, if you don’t mind. And don’t worry about gas; send me a receipt and I’ll reimburse you.”
Ilya truly has the nicest boss ever.
Fifty minutes later and it’s nearing seven at night. The sun is still high in the sky and beaming down on Ilya’s work clothes almost brutally.
He sits in his car, Yuna’s laptop safely in its bag on the passenger seat. His boss’s house is not the gated mansion or skyscraper penthouse that he’d imagined. It’s a little ways out of the city, only ten minutes after the limits.
The place is still gigantic and essentially a house-version of Yuna’s office. The ruggedness of natural elements paired with modern windows and angles, surrounded by trees and nature makes Ilya feel at ease and not out of place.
He sighs, grabs the laptop bag, and exits his car. Between closing the door behind him and reaching the top of the steps to the front door, Ilya had started sweating. He hastily rolls his sleeves up while simultaneously trying to knock on the door.
A few seconds pass with no answer. Ilya goes to knock again when the door opens, revealing Yuna’s son.
Now, she does have a picture of him on her desk, which Ilya is now realizing is not at all recent. He had been expecting a boy in elementary school, absolutely not someone his own age. Not the man that is staring at him expectantly with a stunning smile. Not the athletic shirt that’s straining around his biceps and tight at his chest. What the fuck?
“Hi! You’re my mom’s assistant, right?” Yuna will be hearing some choice words from Ilya, when he figures out how to disguise them.
Ilya nods. “Da. Ilya.” His eyes trace the way the man’s hair falls over his forehead, trying to be subtle as his gaze goes down—fuck are those freckles?
The man’s happiness is somehow radiant and Ilya feels his own cheeks lifting into a grin. He stretches his hand out for Ilya to shake.
“I’m Shane. Mom always tells us about how much she likes having you around,” Shane says and lets go of his hand. Ilya feels prideful that he’s helpful to this beautiful man’s mother. “Says that you make her days way easier.”
“Ah. It’s what I was hired to do, so I hope so,” Ilya says bashfully, a tone that he will revisit later.
Shane leans against the doorframe and crosses his arms distractedly. God, Ilya wants to take a bite of them. “You know, Dad and I really had to push for her to hire someone to help her out. Just last year, she was doing a lot of the things you do on her own while also keeping H.E. running. Relied on the general secretaries to remind her of stuff.”
Ilya nods again, shifting his feet. “Wow. I already do so much. Cannot imagine doing all of it.” It comes out a little stilted in a way he hopes he can blame on the language barrier. He would also like to think that the heat climbing up his neck is due to the sun and decidedly not from the attention that his boss’s son is gracing him with.
“Right?! Anyways, you probably just worked a super long, boring shift, so I won’t keep you!” Shane is standing fully again, still wearing that same, perfect smile.
Ilya shrugs at him. “It’s okay.” He hands over the laptop bag. “You are very pretty but probably off-limits.” In all honesty, that had meant to be an inside-thought and absolutely not something for Shane’s ears.
Not like he can take it back now without seeming like a loser or a coward. Both of which he does not want to look like in front of Shane Hollander, Yuna Hollander’s son.
Meanwhile, Shane has apparently short-circuited. “Uh—” Ilya has already painted on a confident grin that he hopes isn’t cocky or smug and turned on his heal to walk down the front steps.
“I will see you around, Shane!” Ilya calls over his shoulder.
“Yeah… Sure…” Shane mumbles to himself, then closes the door after a few moments.
Ilya practically tears his car door off and slams it shut behind him. Why the fuck did I say that? He spends his car ride home with the radio drowning out his spiralling about certainly being fired the next day when Yuna arrives in Ottawa.
In his apartment, he reluctantly checks his phone. A text and a call.
Yuna Hollander (1) Missed Call
Please call me. I promise you’re not in trouble.
“Fuck,” Ilya mutters.
The phone rings twice before Yuna picks up.
“I am sorry—” Ilya rushes out before his boss can tear him a new one.
Yuna scoffs, amused. “Ilya, I said that you’re not in any trouble. I just want to know what this is about you calling my son pretty, hm?” Ilya cheeks go aflame almost instantly at being teased about a supposed crush. “Him being off-limits?”
Ilya sighs. “I did not mean to say this out loud… He was talking and talking—” he grows frustrated with how hard it is so speak right now. “And— and then Shane says goodbye and I did not think!”
Yuna laughs, not unkindly. “My poor son was so embarrassed when he called me. I had to pry his side of the story out of him when he just clammed up.”
“Oh.”
“Yes, oh. Maybe I’ll invite you to the events that you’re not required at… You two can mingle a bit.” Yuna is thinking out loud in the way that Ilya is used to her doing. A tiny bit different as she is now apparently setting her personal assistant up with her son. “Lord knows my Shane needs normal interactions with people his own age.”
“Yuna, that’s not—”
She cuts him off. “That’s not up to you to decide, I’m afraid!” Ilya can hear her pleased smile. “I’ll see you tomorrow by noon, Ilya.”
He bites his lip and sighs again. “…See you tomorrow, Yuna,” he responds eventually.
The line goes dead and Ilya stares at his phone until it turns off. Well, at least he’s not fired.
cute

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"But but the three years and no build up"
I dont care.
I literally do not care.
That was some rom com soulmate shit that I gobble up.
If hetero rom coms can get away with that stuff so can Scott and Kip.
Anyways. Look at them.
I feel that if Kip as a normal gay man from New York, found out how he and ilya first hooked up and for how long he would give shane such an loving bitching out as a 'elder gay' and I know their situation isnt a 100% fit for cruising but the comedy to me of :
"You can't marry the first guy who cruises you in the shower at 19 Shane"
"If Scott had cruised you in the shower at 19 would you have fucked him for 7 years and then married him Shane"
"He took your gay virginity shane and you just gave up on all other men at 21 no one else has fucked you in the ass shane"
"This is the real reason gay men aren't safe in professional sports they are not getting enough gay culture to know not marry the first guy who cruises them at 19 in the shower shane"
And I dont know if he would admit it to Scott but I want ilya to admit to someone else who calls him on it he had no real idea what he was doing " i was 19 I barely knew better if at all and had slept with one other guy and i am happily married to the guy i cruised at 19 what do you want i grew up in an actively homophobic country AND he was into it "
Ever feel like your porn is maybe TOO sexy? Think this is the right time to break the sexual tension with some humor? Come join in on our fandom-agnostic Bad Sex Bingo!
That’s right, any fandom can enjoy our prompts for imperfect and regrettable sexual situations.
We’ll be running from February (just in time to regret not breaking up with your SO for valentines!) until an indefinite future point in time.
Check out our pinned post for instructions on how to participate and our FAQ. We’ve got two (2!) beautiful board themes to choose from delivered in fully accessible PDF form to your email! Look at this x-ray of a lightbulb up someone’s ass!
I’m running this thing if any of yall are looking for something to do with your February lol.
…for a given value of “running.” I should have automated everything so I don’t have to touch it, but I’ll be hovering for a week or so to make sure it’s working.
This is hilarious and needs to be revived
Doin some limited palette stuff to shake off the dust ahead of fandom trumps hate auctions wrapping up (about 20 hours left if you still want to bid!) and having signed up for the hollanov bb.
Rounding out the trading cards for @luulapants fic, “the tennis club” with some canon characters! It can happen.
Omg if you’re not reading The Tennis Club go do so right now!

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cottage activities
I feel like Ilya would definitely get some “ball and chain” type of comments regarding Shane and at one point he ends up in a group of guys who start ragging on him when he's thinking about heading out early, calling him whipped, joking about Shane having him on a tight leash, and Ilya ends up just saying, genuinely confused, “do you guys not like your wives?” There’s complete silence for a second before Ilya continues, “maybe you should give them the chance to find someone who actually enjoys spending time with them." And then he goes home to his husband, who also happens to be his favourite person in the world.