моя москва.

“ you’re mine. you hear me? ”

“ were you with him/her? ” 

“ why is she/he calling you? ”

“ do they know we’re together? ”

“ were you with him/her? ”

“ i don’t want you seeing them anymore ”

“ did she/he make a pass at you? ”

“ i know you were with her/him ”

“ you belong to me ”

“ i can’t believe you were with her/him ”

“ i don’t like the way he’s/she’s looking at you ”

“im NOT jealous ”

“ i thought you only had eyes for me ”

“ he/she can’t make you feel the way i make you feel ”

“ you’re too good for her/him  ”

“is there someone else?”

“ you were flirting with them ”

“ they were flirting with you ”

“ i don’t want you talking to them again ”

“ i can’t stop picturing you with him/her ”

“ the thought of you with him/her makes me sick ”

☂  what are your character’s rainy day activities?

≈    does your character prefer lying on the beach & sunbathing or swimming?

♪    does your character have any musical talents?

☾   what is your character’s fondest memory?

†    what is your character’s religious beliefs?

➢   how is your character’s relationship with their parents?

⋈    alcohol or no? if yes, why did your character start drinking in the first place? for fun?

✣    is your character a forgiving person?

ღ    how is your character in bed? do they like it rough? 

♥     is your character the kind to sleep around? 

♨    is your character a warm and friendly person? or are they the ones who keep people at an arms length. 

✯     for their birthday, does your character prefer to have a huge celebration with all their family and friends, or do they prefer a small gathering with close family and close friends only?

*Accidentally spills [[SPECIFY HERE]] on you*

*Slaps you*

*Kisses you on the lips*

*Bites your lip*

*Rubs your shoulders*

*Dumps ice water over your head*

*Winks at you*

*Flips hair at you*

*Throws a ball of paper towards you*

*Hands you a note, inside it says [[SPECIFY HERE]]*

*Slams the door shut behind you*

*Storms out of the room*

*Wraps my arms around you from behind*

*Kisses your neck*

*Nibbles on your earlobe*

*Tucks a strand of hair behind your ear*

*Strokes your hair*

*Caresses your cheek*

*Holds you in my arms*

QUOTES - PICK UP LINES EDITION

“You’re cute and I’m horny. You thinking what I’m thinking?”

“I see you like cardio… wanna go back to my place and do it together?”

“I’m sorry, but I just received a call for you. From heaven? I think they’re missing an angel.”

“Hold my hand? I’m afraid I’m getting lost in your eyes.”

“Is that a mirror in your pocket? Because I can see myself in your pants.”

“Are you a pokemon? Because I’d like to peek-at-chu.”

“If I had a dollar for every beautiful girl/guy I saw tonight, I’d have one dollar. Because the only beautiful girl/guy in here is you.”

“Maybe I could show you my [[SPECIFY ITEM]] collection. It’s back at my house, so we’d have to go there but…”

*Spills a drink on your shirt* “I’m so sorry! But if it’s any reassurance, I think that top would look better on my bedroom floor anyways.”

QUOTES - STRANGERS EDITION

“I’m sorry, have we met before?”

“I don’t know you, but thanks.”

“You’re a very nice guy/girl, you know that?”

“We only just met… but I’d really like to see you again.”

“Do you think you could move your ass out of my friend’s seat?”

“It’s none of your business. We just met.”

“Hey I’m [[NAME HERE]] and my crazy ex-girlfriend/boyfriend is here and I was wondering if you’d pretend to date me so I can get them off my back?”

“I’m so sorry about that! Let me buy you a new sandwich.”

“Oh shit. I didn’t mean to trip you I swear, I’m sorry.”

QUOTES - WORKPLACE EDITION

“Did you get that email I sent you last night?”

“No, I’m serious. She/he brought a flask to work.”

“I overheard the boss and I think you’re about to be put up for a promotion!”

“I know what you’ve got in that top drawer.”

“I can’t believe you’re drunk at work.”

“You know, most people watch porn at home.”

“Your Netflix binge is using up all the broadband.”

“Stop torrenting, asshole! I have a report to send off to Japan in an hour and I can’t even open Gmail!”

“If you spent half as much time on doing your job as you do on World on Warcraft, maybe you’d have a chance at a promotion too.”

“You’ve been working here for 6 years and you don’t know where the break room is?”

QUOTES - SCHOOL EDITION

“Didn’t you hear? [[NAME HERE]] and [[NAME HERE]] hooked up last night!”

“We lost the playoffs.”

“The girls team beat the boys!”

“I heard he/she got called into the principal’s office.”

“Apparently the swim team had an orgy after hours.”

“I heard they were fucking in the bathroom.”

“She/he’s been paying people to do their homework!”

“She/he fell running in the hallway and knocked out a few teeth.”

“I can’t believe we’re graduating this year.”

“Being a freshman sucks.”

“I slept with a sophomore last weekend.”

“She/he told me they were a junior!”

“Why are those freshmen staring at you?”

“Is there a reason everyone suddenly knows your name overnight?”

“How come everyone suddenly knows who I am?”

“Did you tell them about my [[INSERT SECRET HERE]]?!”

“I can’t believe you hooked up with my boyfriend/girlfriend.”

“I definitely failed that test.”

“I got an A on my essay!”

QUOTES - SASS EDITION

“Wow, there’s a stick wedged so far up your ass I don’t think I can even pull it out.”

“I’m sorry, but my number of fucks to give has officially reached a negative number.”

“Uranus called and said I’m huge and in the way.”

“I’m searching… searching… oh. Well would you look at that. I couldn’t find any fucks to give.”

“What’s the difference between a dolphin and you? Dolphins have brains.”

“Just because that’s mistletoe hanging above us doesn’t mean I’m going to kiss you.”

“Take a picture, it’ll last longer.”

“At this point you might as well ask for my autograph.”

QUOTES - ARGUMENTS/ROWS/QUARRELS EDITION

“You know I’m right! I’m always right!”

“Shut up. Just shut up!”

“I don’t need to listen to this.”

“You’re lying.”

“I can’t believe you’d say that. Even in an argument, that was low of you.”

“I can’t look at you.”

“Don’t fucking touch me.”

“If you say one more word, I swear…”

“Pipe down, you’re making a scene.”

“What’s wrong with you?”

“Now I know why people think you’re neurotic.”

“You must be crazy.”

“I’m not backing down.”

“You can’t hide the truth forever, you know.”

“What’s your issue?”

“You make me so angry.”

“This has nothing to do with you.”

QUOTES - LOVERS EDITION

“And… and I love you! It’s what I’ve been trying to tell you all along.”

“I don’t know how to say it. But you know what I’m trying to say, right?”

“I’ve never been good at this. I don’t do relationships. But I… I want to try with you.”

“You’re the one that I want.”

“I don’t care. I don’t give a shit, don’t you get it? I don’t give a flying fuck unless it has to do with you. I love you.”

“Please don’t say that. You know you’re the only one for me. Fuck everyone else.”

“I can’t stop thinking about you. Every minute of every day. I could be standing in the shower or cooking breakfast, but you’re still the only thought on my mind.”

“I want to wake up next to you, everyday for the rest of my life.”

“I’ve always been afraid of commitment, okay? That’s why I sleep around.”

“I’ve never wanted to give love a try until now.”

“Please, don’t leave me.”

“I need you more than you will ever know.”

“I love you more than I could ever express in words.”

QUOTES - DRUNK AND KNOCKING AT YOUR DOOR EDITION

*Starts singing [[SPECIFY SONG NAME]] outside your door/window*

“I didn’t fuck him/her, I swear!”

“I brought vodka and ice cream.”

“You left your anal beads at my house. Wait… no, they’re just normal mardi gras beads.”

“I can’t believe you went without me!”

“I love you, I love you so much and you just don’t see it. What am I supposed to do?”

“I know you’re sad and upset. Let me be your distraction! I want to be your distraction!”

“I can’t find my apartment and I couldn’t stop thinking about you.”

“Let me in! I think I’m gonna throw up.”

TEXTS - DRUNK EDITION

[TEXT] You dumped me for HIM/HER?

[TEXT] I can’t stop listening to our song.

[TEXT] My pillow still smells like you.

[TEXT] You left your cologne when you moved out. I used it up.

[TEXT] Do you even love me?

[TEXT] What happened to us?

[TEXT] I just want to eat bacon and see you naked. And then eat bacon off of you naked.

[TEXT] IM26C4U.

[TEXT] You never gave a shit about me.

[TEXT] I couldn’t care less.

[TEXT] Now you know how it feels.

[TEXT] I still love you.

[TEXT] I can’t stop thinking about all the times you told me you loved me… and wondering if they were lies.

TEXTS - EMERGENCY EDITION

[TEXT] I fell down the stairs and… well, I’m in the ER.

[TEXT] ______ got injured during their game and I’m waiting with them at the hospital but I can’t do this alone.

[TEXT] Did you know your mother/father is at the hospital right now??

[TEXT] I was cleaning out the garage and I’m stuck under some boxes!! Please help before the spiders get me.

[cuddles into 2]

[y AWN]

[loooong russian yawn]

[rolls over on his side]

[oh hello sleeping husband]

[don’t mind if he kisses his nose]

мой цветок, good morning.

[it’s too early for this jfc]

[but he can’t help but smile anyway, though he’s too lazy to open both his eyes. he’ll just open one instead]

He laughed softly, his hands then moving up to rid himself of his jacket and shirt. It seemed like, once he removed his upper articles of clothing, that the room temperature dropped a degree or two. Well, that couldn’t be helped. It was in his blood. Literally.

Are you an interior  decorator? Because when I saw you, the entire room became beautiful.

Did  you sit in a pile of sugar? Cause you have a pretty sweet ass.

Do  you have a Band-Aid? Because I just scraped my knee falling for you.

If  I were a stop light, I’d turn red everytime you passed by, just so I could  stare at you a bit longer.

If you were a  vegetable you’d be a cute-cumber.

There  are people who say Disneyland is the happiest place on earth. Apparently,  none of them have ever been in your arms.

Are  you an orphanage? Cause I wanna give you kids.

Are  you my Appendix? Because I have a funny feeling in my stomach that makes me  feel like I should take you out.

I  was so enchanted by your beauty that I ran into that wall over there. So I’m  going to need your name and number for insurance purposes.

I’m  not staring at your boobs. I’m staring at your heart.

Can  I take your picture to prove to all my friends that angels do exist?

Your  body is 65% water and I’m thirsty.

My  doctor says I’m lacking Vitamin U.

Can  I follow you home? Cause my parents always told me to follow my dreams.

If  I were a cat I’d spend all 9 lives with you.

Smoking  is hazardous to your health… and baby, you’re killing me!

You  must be a hell of a thief because you stole my heart from across the room.

Do  you have a twin sister? Then you must be the most beautiful girl in the  world!

You  know I’d like to invite you over, but I’m afraid you’re so hot that you’ll  skyrocket my air-conditioning bill.

If  I were to ask you out on a date, would your answer be the same as the answer  to this question?

Are  you a campfire? Cause you are hot and I want s'more.

I  bet you $20 you’re gonna turn me down.

I  like Legos, you like Legos, why don’t we build a relationship?

Would  you grab my arm so I can tell my friends I’ve been touched by an angel?

There’s  only one thing I want to change about you, and that’s your last name.

Did  you have lucky charms for breakfast? Because you look magically delicious!

Can  I borrow your cell phone? I need to call animal control, because I just saw a  fox!

I’m  no organ donor but I’d be happy to give you my heart.

Kiss  me if I’m wrong, but dinosaurs still exist, right?

Do  you believe in love at first sight, or should I walk by again?

You  see my friend over there? [Point to friend] He wants to know if YOU think I’M  cute.

Can  I borrow a kiss? I promise I’ll give it back.

Are  you my phone charger? Because without you, I’d die.

Are  you a cat? Cause you are purrrfect

You  know how they say skin is the largest organ on the human body? Not in my  case.

My  lips are like skittles. Wanna taste the rainbow?

I  have an “owie” on my lip. Will you kiss it and make it better?

Hey baby, I must be a  light switch, cuz every time I see you, you turn me on!

Do  I know you? Cause you look just like my next girlfriend/boyfriend.

Have  you always been this cute, or did you have to work at it?

Was  your father a mechanic? Then how did you get such a finely tuned body?

Apart  from being sexy, what do you do for a living?

Is  it hot in here or is it just you?

I  blame you for global warming… your hotness is too much for the planet to  handle!

You’re  single. I’m single. Coincidence? I think not.

Stop,  drop, and roll, baby. You are on fire.

Baby,  you’re so hot, you make the equator look like the north pole.

I  hope there’s a fire truck nearby, cause you’re smokin’!

I  just got dumped, and I think that you could make me feel better.

If  you were a burger at McDonalds, you’d be McGorgeous.

Your  hand looks heavy. Let me hold it for you.

You’re  so hot, I could bake cookies on you.

Is  your car battery dead? Because I’d like to jump you.

I’m  lost. Can you tell me which road leads to your heart?

“Don’t bother yourself with it, it’s nothing.”

“I don’t want to talk about it. I’m not ready.”

“I’m not hiding anything.”

“That’s none of your business.”

“Don’t stick your nose to my life.”

“It’s the one thing I can’t share.”

“You never talk of your problems, why should I?”

“Never mind, it’s nothing.”

“You’re just imagining it.”

“I have no idea what you’re referring to.”

“There’s nothing to talk about.”

“You have no reason to worry.”

“Just forget it, okay?”

“Stop prying!”

Be warned that these are very scary sentences. If you can’t handle horror, or get nightmares easily, these sentences probably aren’t for you.