Groomers are very good at saying the things you want to hear. If you feel like youāre mature past your age, they will prey on that. They will shower you with praise about how mature and smart you are. They will tell you that itās okay that youāre with them because actually youāre so much more mature than anyone else your age and nobody else will understand.
They will find the things that make you happy and use it as bait. They will take advantage of your mental health struggles and use it to guilt you into being with them.
Adults are not inherently evil- actually, itās important for teenagers to have adults that they trust, and if they canāt find that in real life then its okay if itās only through the internet. Our job is to protect the younger generations. Many adults will do their best to help you figure out who and what you want to be.
But please, please look for the signs. Theyāll be small, innocuous. Predators are good at finding openings to strike
Another thing- being groomed is never your fault. EVER. It is the adultās responsibility to keep the relationship innocent, and it is never your fault if they ignore it.
Even if you start the flirting.
Even if you send inappropriate pictures.
Even if you āstopped them from committing suicideā.
Even if you like the pictures they send you.
Even if you relied on them.
Even if they were your friend.
Even if you didnāt know what was happening until it is too late.
It is never your fault, and you should never feel guilty for it. Groomers know exactly how to prey on you and make you feel bad enough to never speak out. You are not responsible for them.
Please, please be careful out there guys. If a situation feels weird or you get bad vibes, itās okay to back out. Itās okay to be rude.
And if you have been groomed before, or if youāre currently being groomed-
Itās not your fault. You are not the perpetrator. It might take some time for you to realize, to understand, but when you do, donāt hate yourself. Dont think you were just as bad for reciprocating. Dont blame yourself for anything you said or did. It is not your fault. It is never your fault. It is our responsibility as adults to protect and support our younger counterparts, and I am so, so sorry that someone broke that and took advantage of your trust. Itās going to be okay. You did nothing wrong. Itās okay to reach out to someone if you need help. You donāt have to do it alone.
Please be safe, and do whatever you need to keep that safety. And if a relationship ever starts to feel strange or uncomfortable, itās okay to back out. Block that person. Leave the server. Your comfort and safety is so important, and donāt let anyone else make you think otherwise.
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