zen's thiddies

anomalocaris get it ass

anomalocaris get it ass

life is all about practicing self care ❤️

do NOT let people enjoy things. hold the line

telling a vampire "youre not allowed in my house anymore" and they get blasted out through the nearest wall

sir please calm down i didnt "edit" crash bandicoot into your wedding pictures he was an invited guest

hey op. i noticed your intentionally humorous, structured post with a setup and punchline about a relatable experience wasnt a complete mirror with reality. my name is 5,000 tumblr users. my job? to inform you of something you already knew, because i cant fathom that people in the world around me have interiority and intelligence and that im not the main character of the universe. apologise for your stupidity with tears

girl who claps and smiles after hitting the bong

does anyone actually think talking about the weather is bad small talk. i love talking about the weather. i would talk about the weather with my closest friend and im going to talk about it with YOU 🫵

I don't want to work for a living anymore

mm. I don't want to work for a living anymore

side benefit of communal all-gender restrooms is that they may be our best chance to shame cis men into washing their hands

i was in a communal all-gender restroom today and as i was washing my hands a middle-aged man came out of one of the stalls, started to make for the door, clocked me standing at the sinks, and changed course to wash his hands with a real hangdog look on his face

are u flirting with me through tumblr likes yes or yes

shitshit shit. umm no its fine. does anyone see a grenade pin on tbe floor

attaching something to an email is so scary. what if i accidentally put hard-core porn in there. i don't think i have any downloaded but what if i do and i attached it to the email. what then.