This is an alternative universe for the Marauders that is constantly on my mind. The characters are millenial born in the 90s and teenagers in the 2010's.
Everything is practically the same as in canon except they are muggles. And Hogwarts is a prestigious boarding school.
Remus & Sirius are childhoood friends who meet at ten because the Lupins used to work for the Blacks. But for circumstances they break apart. But Remus gets a scholarship to Hogwarts in sixth year. Muggleborns= Scholarshipped kids
Purebloods= Rich kids. More like.
There is still discrimination for the scholarshipped ones.
Marauders: James Potter, Sirius Black, Remus Lupin, Peter Pettigrew
Girls: Lily Evans, Marlene Mckinnon, Mary Macdonald
The Knights: Nicolai Mulciber, Samuel Avery, Amycus Carrow, Severus Snape
The Knights are this group of pretentious rich slytherin boys. It is like a club of boys that socialize and come from important families, and make connections for the future. They make big parties and social events. Think about fraternities in colleges.
The tradition had existed since Hogwarts was founded. Members are usually rich and members of the sacred 28 (that in this AU are the the descendants of the first 28 students at Hogwarts). There are exceptions for example Sirius was invited to join even if he was a Gryffindor only because he was a Black and all male Blacks had been Knights before. He rejected their invitation though. Or Snape, with a scholarship, who was invited only because the boys take advantage of his brain and he does their schoolwork for money.
The Black Sister's Gang: Bellatrix Black, Andromeda Black, Narcissa Black, Rodolphus Lestrage, Rabastan Lestrange, Lucius Malfoy, other OCs.
Ted's band: Ted Tonks, Adam Mckinnon (Marlene's older brother), my OCs Tammy, Roger and Will.
Other characters: Frank Longbottom, Edgar Bones, Hestia Jones and the ICONIC Grant Chapman (who belongs to Mskingbean89)
Main ships: Wolfstar, Jily, Tedromeda, Dorlene.
Regulus is aroace, Mary is aromantic and Lily is demisexual.
Trans and non-binary representation: Remus is a trans, boy McGonagall is a trans woman, my OC Tammy is a trans girl.
Albus Dumbledore is a good teacher and a gay ICON, Peter doesn't betray anyone.
I will post short stories within this universe not particularly in order and with different characters, ships or circumstances. This is for your enjoyment with updates everytime I get inspired. I do not write an organized novel or fanfic book because I don't have time to sit down and write actual chapters. But I still love to write. So I hope you can enjoy.
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Hello! I hope I'm not late. I will reshare a little Wolfstar One-shot. I am proud of the dialogue on this one. I posted it a while ago as Little Freak. Hope you enjoy!
****************
Sirius stared at Remus' text for what felt like hours. His body was sweating, his heart was beating fast, his mouth was dry.
Remus: Let's meet up in person, shall we?
Meet up in person. Sirius didn't know if he could do it. Just thinking about it, made Sirius' tummy twist. It was the same sensation he got when he rode a rollercoaster for the first time when he was fourteen, when James took him. Nervousness and anxiety but at the same time, the thrill of wanting to do it so badly, that the negative feelings didn't quite matter.
Sirius hadn't seen Remus in person since they were ten, eleven. Sirius didn't remember. Remus was a different person back then. He had a different name. He had longer hair. He wore dresses and sweaters. He was a girl. Not anymore.
Rosie. Rosie. Rosie. Rosalind Lupin.
Rosie used to be Sirius' favorite person in the world. Years ago, The Lupins used to work for his family. And Sirius befriended their daughter who was the same age as him. Because he felt lonely. And he was an extrovert and energetic kid.
They did pranks together, they got into adventures with Regulus. They pretended to be pirates, warriors, sailors, wizards, aliens. They shared secrets. They talked through walkie talkies until very late at night. They made bonfires. They watched horror movies that were supposed to be for adults. And when everything was too much with Sirius' family, as it always had been, Sirius would sneak to the little cottage The Lupins lived. Inside The Black's property. Because being with Rosie comforted him.
Rosie and her books. Rosie and her little freckles across her nose. Rosie and her light brown curls that she always tied up. How Sirius loved to take the the hair tie to losen her hair, because Sirius liked how it floated in the wind. How Rosie got angry, or rolled her eyes. Rosie wearing her father's old sweaters than were too big for her. Rosie coming up for the perfect plan or prank. Her mischievious smile. The time she ran her fingers though Sirius' hair after she found him crying because of his parents. Rosie's nice father, Lyall. Rosie's cool mum, Hope.
Sirius sighed. It was Remus now. Remus had come out as a trans boy a year ago or so. Sirius had respected the change of name, the change of pronouns, the testosterone Remus began using, everything Remus had told him about his transition process.
Remus: This is me, Sirius. It had always been me. But now... Now I am finally being myself.
Sirius: I totally respect that. Whatever makes you happy, Remus :)
Remus: Thank you...
Sometimes Sirius felt that Remus was a whole different person though. Or maybe that was what Sirius was afraid of. He was afraid that Rosie would be forever gone. It was silly. It was stupid. Sirius was being an idiot that didn't understand transgender people's issues. And he was being selfish. He shouldn't think that way.
Rosie-Remus... They were the same person. Sirius' friend.
After The Lupins were fired (Sirius still didn't know what had happened or why his parents were so angry with Mr. Lupin), Sirius and Remus stayed in touch. Only through emails, then phone calls (very long phone calls), and then over the years, only texts. The last texts weren't very often. They weren't very retailers in them like before. Sirius was afraid that they ran out of things to talk about. That things weren't the same.
Sirius had been very busy with school, with The Marauders (his best friends in the world), with parties, with girls, stupid things that a sixteen year old teenage boy would care about. And perhaps Remus had been the same.
So yeah, that text...That text gave Sirius shivers down his spine.
Sirius: Sure Remus...
Sirius: Is everything okay?
Remus: Does something have to be wrong for me to want to see you?
Remus: :)
At least that gave Sirius hope. And he smiled.
Sirius: Just checking...
Sirius: Where do you want to meet?
Remus: I know the perfect place
Remus: They sell the best milshakes
So Remus remembered how they gulped milshakes from different flavors when they were kids. The more sugar they had, the better. Walburga detested that her son consumed such things.
Sirius: Sounds wonderful
Sirius: Are you free this weekend?
Remus: Yeah, how about Saturday, 5 p.m
Remus: I'll text you the adress
So it was happening. Sirius was going to see Remus. He had seen a few pictures, but most of his face was covered, and the curls covered most of the frame. So Sirius didn't know how much Remus had changed.
Sirius felt an urge to vomit.
Sirius: Sounds good.
Oh Fucking Hell.
******************************************
Sirius' palms were sweating. Sirius' armpits were sweating. Sirius' genitals were even sweating. So he took off his leather jacket. He ran his fingers though his hair, and he realized how sticky they were. So he wiped his palms on his trousers.
Sirius began moving his leg. At least that was calming him down a bit. Sirius looked around. A group of girls were looking at him. He smiled politely and they dissolved into a pack of giggles. Sirius looked away.
If only they knew he was dying. He was so nervous. So so nervous.
Ping. A text.
Sirius took out his phone thinking it was Remus. Probably cancelling. Probably telling him he had arrived. Sirius didn't know.
James: Video games and pizza tonight?
James: Wormy is already here
None of Sirius' friends knew about Remus. Sirius liked keeping him a secret. Sirius didn't know what was going to happen with Remus, so he didn't answer. And he was too nervous to type anyway.
James: Pads?
Sorry, James. Not now.
Sirius locked his phone and he was pocketing it, when he heard a voice behind him. A male voice.
"Sirius?"
Sirius froze only for two seconds but they seemed like hours. He turned slowly. A tall skinny boy was standing in front of him. Remus. Remus had the same soft brown curls but he kept them short above his head. He had the the same freckles across his nose. The same light brown eyes. He was wearing the same big sweaters he used to wear and some jeans and converse.
Everything was the same. But now Remus was a teenage boy. A very cute teenage boy.
And when he smiled, Sirius figured that his smile was the same.
Perhaps Sirius had been looking for too long. Because Remus looked down embarrassed. He began playing with his sweater sleeves. He used to do the same when he was a child.
So Sirius decided to react and cleared his throat. He gave Remus a nice soft smile.
"Remus..." he stood, up nervously "You look... Amm... You look...."
Remus looked up and his mouth twisted into his iconic mischievous smile. It was the same.
"Different?" Remus tried, giggling.
Sirius chuckled, he rubbed his neck.
"Sure" he said "You are so much taller. You have grown so fast"
Remus used to be taller than Sirius when they were kids as well. Sirius always thought he would become taller with time.
"And apparently you stayed the same height" Remus joked, looking at him upside down.
Sirius gasped. All of his friends bothered him because of his height. Same height that most girls. Only Peter understood his struggle.
"Very funny, Remus" Sirius tutted, as Remus laughed. His laughter was the same. But deeper.
Sirius took a seat again, feeling more relieved. And Remus took a seat in front of him in the booth.
"I missed teasing you"
Sirius pouted "You teased me a lot over texts"
"Not the same" Remus snorted. He hid his hands into his sweater sleeves. He put his elbows on the table, covering his mouth.
Remus was doing exactly the same that Sirius remembered.
There was a brief moment of silence after that. Sirius kept smiling like an idiot he didn't know why. His eyes were focused on Remus, but his brain moved them away, perhaps thinking it wasn't appropiate to stare.
Remus hid his smile behind his sleeves. And he was staring at Sirius openly and without discretion. So Sirius decided to break the silence.
"How have you been?"
"Great" Remus cleared his throat and moved in his seat.
"Yeah?"
"Yeah"
"How...how..." Sirius began playing with the sugar can "What have you been doing this summer?"
"Working..."
"Oh that's a bummer..." he turned the sugar can without noticing that he was pouring sugar on the table. Remus observed amused "Oh shit...." Sirius noticed "Shit...." he began cleaning everything in with his hands.
Remus was softly laughing.
"Very nice, Sirius"
"Oh shut up!" Sirius smiled "This is you fault, actually" Sirius put his hair behind his ear.
"My fault?" Remus snorted.
"I am nervous" Sirius confessed "I am nervous and I am playing with sugar cans like a fool"
Remus giggled.
"Even the lady at the counter is looking at me"
Remus laughed because it was true.
"You did that on yourself" Remus tutted.
"Because I am nervous!" Sirius put the can back, and crossed his arms.
"Why are you nervous?" Remus smiled.
"Because..." Sirius snorted, he began laughing softly "Because I haven't seen you in five years?"
"Yeah"
"We've been texting and all" Sirius began playing with the menu now "But it is not the same"
"I know..."
"And you look different.... Like like...."
"A boy?"
Sirius nodded.
"Maybe I look ridiculous...."
"Ridiculous?" Sirius asked "No no..."
"No no?"
"No no"
Remus giggled.
"You've been busy" he said softly "You've been always busy"
Sirius sighed. It was true. Marauders' hang outs. Family stupid dinners and gatherings. Parties. Birthdays. School.
Remus had asked him to see him before. But Sirius used to have every excuse. Until Remus stopped asking. And Remus asked again this time. And Sirius finally agreed.
Sirius swallowed "I am sure you'd been busy as well"
"And Hope and Lyall..." Sirius gasped "How are Hope and Lyall?"
Remus licked his lips "Divorced"
"Oh..."
Remus giggled awkwardly.
"You didn't tell me"
"It's recent... They are making the papers... Talking to lawyers"
Remus looked down sadly. The difference between them was that Remus had had a great relationship with his parents. While Sirius hadn't. Or that's how Sirius remembered it.
"I am sorry" Sirius sighed.
"Yeah it is fine" Remus sniffed, playing with his sleeves "I just..." he put a lock of hair in his eye away "I reckon maybe it is my fault"
Sirius' eyes widened.
"Why?" Sirius shook his head "Why do you say that?"
"Lyall...." Remus hissed "Lyall is not very okay with me being a boy... Hope is. They used to have pretty nasty fights about that"
Sirius touched Remus' elbow before he could stop himself. Remus observed that and smiled. Sirius didn't dare to take his hand away.
"It is not your fault" Sirius said "That is their issue, really"
Remus pouted. Sirius smiled.
"You are doing a great job as a boy"
Remus raised an eyebrow. Then he laughed.
"Thank you?" Remus leaned in "How does someone make a good job being a boy?"
"I...I don't know" Sirius snorted. Remus giggled "But you are doing it great.... You are doing it great, sweetheart"
"Thank you, sweetheart" Remus snorted. He covered his face again.
"So....Yeah..."
"How's Reggie?" Remus asked.
Sirius sighed "A pain in the ass"
Remus laughed.
"He is fifteen... He sometimes acts like a 50 year old man. You must remember"
Remus nodded "I remember"
"He is not fun anymore"
"I am sorry to hear that"
Sirius didn't want to talk about Regulus. How Regulus had become ashamed of him. How Regulus had become what Walburga and Orion had expected.
Although he was covering him that afternoon...
"So how are your.... Mmmm...." Sirius crossed his legs "Milkshakes!"
Remus frowned "How are my milkshakes?"
Remus was the only one that made Sirius talk and talk like an idiot. Sirius was trying to ignore how his heart was jumping with joy, because little by little, it was getting easier again with Remus.
Sirius smiled as Remus giggled.
"Not like..." Sirius pointed to the counter "We haven't ordered anything"
"Oh..." Remus nodded "I love their Hersheys milshake" Remus grabbed the menu.
"Chocoholic still?" Sirius smiled.
Remus smiled back "Always" he said "What do you want?" he asked giving Sirius the menu.
"Amm..." Sirius took it.
"Probably something disgusting like tutty fruity.... " Remus smiled. Sirus gasped, making a pout "Or something"
"Okay... I am a fan of trying new flavors and things" Sirius gave Remus' head a soft hit with the menu "You know me pretty well"
"Oh... Yeah" Remus nodded "Like the time you decided to invent the toothpaste milkshake flavor by adding actual toothpaste to the milk"
"It was good!" Sirius protested. Remus laughed.
"It tasted..."
"Minty!"
"Disgusting!"
Sirius rolled his eyes, looking at the menu. Remus observed him smiling.
"Strawberry... And passion fruit"
Remus made a disgusted face.
Sirius stood up, indignated.
"I am gonna order that..." Sirius said. Remus nodded "And you are going to try it. And you are going to be jealous of my milkshake"
Remus smiled. He wanted to stand up but Sirius stopped him.
"I'll pay for them" Sirius stopped him "The milkshakes are on me"
"You sure?"
"Let me buy you milkshake!" Sirius put out his tongue.
"Aren't you gonna buy me chips too?"
"Chips it is"
"I was joking!" But Sirius started walking towards the counter "Sirius!"
Sirius turned. Remus had a wide smile on his face. His face was quite red. He looked happy.
"I... I fucking missed you"
Sirius smiled. But he turned before Remus saw his cheeks going red. He took a deep breath. He was so happy to see Remus again.
****************************************
Sirius' first reaction was to make a face. But it was only because he had expected the shake to be sweet. But it was kind of sour. The taste was terribly wrong at first. But once one's tongue got used to it, it wasn't that bad.
Remus on the other hand, was enjoying his Hershey Milkshake like a kid. He was smiling as he slurped the straw.
"It is actually not bad"
"You're lying"
Sirius scoffed "I am not lying, Remus" he said "Here..." he pushed his glass toward Remus "Try it"
Remus shook his head "No thank you"
"Let me try yours"
"No thank you"
"Remus!" Sirius protested.
"Sirius!" Remus used the same tone. He smiled.
They looked into each other's eyes for a while. Sirius noticed Remus' freckles. And how his eyelashes were too long to be true. But they were cute as Remus blinked.
Then Sirius tried to reach Remus' milkshake. But Remus tried to stop him at the same time.
"Just give me a tiny sip!"
"No! Sirius!"
"Please Remus!"
"It is mine! I ordered it first!"
"Come on!"
"It is not my fault that your shake is horrid!"
"My shake is not horrid!"
Remus was laughing as he held his glass tight. Sirius was trying to pull towards him.
"I want to try it!"
"You are gonna spill everything up!" Remus giggled.
Finally Sirius managed to take the milkshake.
"HA!" But as he took a sip, he moved his elbow and his own shake fell and all of it was spilled over the table, over the chips.
Remus gasped, covering his mouth. And then he began laughing.
"Well..." Sirius said as he slurped Remus' shake "It was awful, anyway"
Remus began laughing, covering his mouth. And his laughter was so contagious that Sirius began laughing as well. They both laughed loud and openly now. Dropping their heads back like kids. Remus bended down because his tummy began hurting of how much he was laughing.
"This is mine!" Remus tried to get his shake back but his sleeves touched the spilled milkshake. And he groaned.
Sirius showed his teeth. And Remus put it on Sirius' face, covering it with milkshake. Remus started laughing again, as Sirius gasped and cleaned himself.
People were looking at them like crazy people, so Sirius noticed. Especially the lady at the counter. Especially the girls from before.
"Hi!" so he waved at them, and smirked at the way Remus was laughing.
They laughed until they both got tired. Then all that was left were soft smiles and them catching their breath again. They both leaned back in their seats, appreaciating each other's company like that.
Now, you have a general idea of how it used to be back then. Sirius and Remus used to have so much fun together. Sirius and Remus used to be so silly together. It was all fun and games, yes. But there were also soft times of silence. Like the one right now. They stayed in silence, enjoying each other's company. There was no need to talk. It was pure comfort. Sirius felt in peace. Like everything was happiness and harmony. Until Sirius started talking and they got back at being goofy again.
That was why Sirius loved to have Remus in his life. And Sirius didn't know how he spent five years without him. Sirius was feeling a warm sensation on his chest. Like something burning inside. He felt the same when Rosie ran her fingers through his hair. He felt the same when Rosie smiled at him after a bad fight with his mother. And Sirius was feeling the same now with Remus.
It didn't matter the name. It didn't matter the gender. Girl or boy. This was his Rosie/Remus. The one Sirius used to adore.
"I need to tell you something" Remus whispered now.
Sirius smiled. Because he wanted. Because he could.
"Yeah?"
Remus sat up straight. He looked into Sirius' eyes.
"I've been...." Remus bit his lip "Partially lying to you"
Sirius sat up straight again.
"What do you mean?"
Remus looked down. He shook his head.
"I don't have friends... My life is pretty miserable at school"
"Oh..." Sirius didn't expect that.
Remus sighed "Everyone had been making my life miserable since I came out..." Remus sniffed, putting his hair away "They call me a confused lesbian. They say that I am sick. That I need help...."
"Remus..." Sirius didn't know what to say.
Remus moved his mouth "It got to the point that it became very dark... I started hurting myself...."
Sirius couldn't hear that.
"Why didn't you tell me?"
"I was embarrassed" Remus swallowed "And you had your friends and your life"
Sirius shook his head.
"My mum said that enough was enough" Remus continued "And... that I should change schools"
Remus smiled. Sirius didn't know why. He felt guilty. He felt guilty for practically ignorning Remus like that. Maybe if Sirius had been more pendant...
"She said that I should go to a private school this time" Remus added "That the money doesn't matter, that if we worked hard we could afford it"
The Lupins had always struggled economically. Sirius remembered he used to see the little cottage they lived in, the little things they had and compared it with everything that The Blacks owned, and sometimes wasted. It wasn't fair.
"And..." Remus smiled, poking Sirius' arm. Sirius tried to smile and not feel guilty "I suggested mum and dad your school"
Sirius raised an eyebrow.
"You are always talking about how much you like your school and your friends... What was it's name? Hollywarts?"
"Hogwarts?"
Remus nodded "The very same" he snorted.
Sirius was speechless. Or maybe he was still thinking about Remus being alone.
"So with my mum's savings, my savings and...." he rolled his eyes "Lyall's savings... And the jobs we have...." Remus licked his lips "I think I would be able to go to school with you this September"
Remus finished giggling awkwardly, because Sirius wasn't saying anything. Sirius was busy blinking and processing the information.
"Sirius?"
"Mmm?"
"Did you hear what I said?"
Sirius nodded. He finished nodding and he nodded again. Just because.
Remus bit his lip.
"Blimey... You hate the fact that I...."
Sirius stood up and he took a seat in Remus' booth, next to him. And he wrapped his arms around him, giving him a hug. Remus was soft, cuddly, he smelled very nice. Soap, chocolate, and men's cologne.
Sirius' eyes filled with tears. He was glad Remus couldn't see that.
"I missed you so much"
When Remus left, Sirius cried for five nights. Sirius felt very sad and lonely for weeks. He hadn't told that to anyone. Not even his soul.
"I missed you too"
Sirius snorted, swallowing his tears. Then he pulled away, grabbing Remus by the shoulders and smiling at him.
"You are going to my school?" Sirius chuckled.
"Yeah" Remus smiled "We are going to be classmates"
"Woow"
"And see each other everyday"
Now Sirius made a face "Woow"
Remus hit his arm, playfully.
"I am so glad!" Sirius snorted, biting his lip "You are gonna love Hogwarts! You are gonna love the teachers! We can do pranks to them together.... And...."
Remus was smiling.
"OH!" Sirius' eyes widened "You are gonna love The Marauders!"
"The Marauders?" Remus raised an eyebrow.
"That is the name of my friend group...."
"The Marauders?" Remus asked again, teasing.
"Oh shut up!"
Remus giggled.
"Maybe you can meet them today!" Sirius beamed remembering James' text "We can go to James' after this... Videogames and pizza"
Remus shrugged "Can't... I'm working"
"Oh..." Sirius made a pout "Bummer"
Remus smiled "It is okay... My job is cool"
"What do you do?"
"I work in a Library"
"Oh...." Sirius teased "I forgot how nerd you were..." Remus rolled his eyes "You are...."
"Shut up, you wanker!"
Remus smiled.
"I work there in every afternoon" Remus stared at his watch "I actually have to be there in twenty minutes"
Sirius sighed. He didn't quite want to say goodbye. That is when he realized how close he was of Remus. And decided that he didn't mind.
"When can I see you again?" Sirius smiled.
Remus shrugged "Complicated and busy summer.... Work, work.... And more work"
It wasn't fair that Remus had to work hard to go to a decent school. Sirius would offer to help. But 1) He couldn't touch his funds until he turned eighteen, 2) He could not tell his parents about Remus, his father flinched someone mentioned Mr. Lupin, 3) Remus wouldn't accept his help.
"See you on September, then?"
Two weeks left. Just two weeks left. Sirius hadn't been that desperate to go back to school.
Little Harry loves his Mum because she heals all the scratches he gets on his knees and elbows, gives him lots of cuddles and kisses before bedtime, and teaches him lots of things about magic and the world that he didnât know.
He loves his Dad because he lets him ride on his shoulders when he gets tired and brings his favorite snacks, they do pranks together to make people laugh, and he gives the best hugs when Harry gets scared at night.
He loves his uncle Sirius because he gets to practice Quidditch with him on his broom and play with him as Padfoot and color in his tattoos.
He loves his uncle Remus because he reads him picture books (does all the silly voices), and always gives him way more chocolate than heâs allowed.
He loves his uncle Peter because he tells funny jokes and makes him yummy food and if he asks nicely heâll turn into Wormtail and sit in his pocket.
He loves his aunty Mary because she makes him cool costumes for halloween and lets him buy any toy he likes when they go shopping together.
He loves his aunty Marlene because she takes him to fun places like the zoo or the waterpark, and tells him stories about Hogwarts when his Mum and Dad were kids.
But the thing they have in common is that they all love him too, so much.
"When you were born, everyone told me that you were destined to make great things. That you were going to be a star. The right heir. A true Black that represented his name... I didn't see that. All I saw was a brat. A stupid boy that couldn't control his feelings and is reckless. You are a bomb, Sirius. You destroy everything you touch. It is a matter of time before people around you notice it... Maybe you are right to leave. The Black name will be better without you. Regulus will be a much better heir than you could ever be. So go. Go with that family and that woman, mumbling about how great they are, how better they are. They might stand you now because they don't know you like we do. But don't come crawling back to me when eventually they push you away... Because they will. You will hurt them with your temper or do something stupid to make them angry....So go! Leave! But don't even think about reaching Regulus ever again because I would never allow it. You are a bad influence for him. If you leave, you forget about him and all of us. You are not the son I wished for. You are a disgrace for me"
These were the last words Walburga told Sirius the day he left. She didn't scream. She didn't touch him like his father's fists did. She used a calm, monotone voice even. But they hurt Sirius more than anything physical his father had done.
Sirius understood that Walburga didn't love him. She didn't hate him either. She just didn't care. She couldn't care less about Sirius. Never did. And never would.
Sirius reacted with insults like "Bitch" and "I hate you" and "I'm never coming back. I hate you all". Which proved Walburga's point about his temper and made him feel more like shit than he did.
But those words followed him long after he left. No matter how much The Potters loved him and cared for him. No matter how happy Remus made him feel. No matter how much he loved his life surrounded by his friends and convinced himself they were his true family. Sirius could never shake those words out of his brain. They appeared when he felt insecure, when he felt sad, when he hated himself. In those dark days the voice of his mother was loud. And he believed her. Because who could know him better than his own mother. He was everything she said. No wonder why he destroyed everything he touched. People around him would eventually get tired of him and leave him.
Those words marked him for life. Physical wounds healed. But those words caused him pain every day of his life.
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Sirius convinced Remus to get a tattoo together. His logic was simple. They were completely in love and they were the literal moon and stars. It was poetic. What a better idea than to get something about each other. Sirius wanted a little moon with an M for Moony and Remus would get a star. With a P for Padfoot.
Remus wasn't convinced at first even though he loved Sirius, he hated tattoos. So he made excuses.
"You know tattoos are forever, right?" Remus asked.
"Yeah"
"What if we break up? What if we end up hating each other? People say 'Don't get a tattoo of your partner. You might regret it'"
"We are never going to break up" Sirius announced with conviction.
Remus smiled amused "How do you know? Things might change"
Sirius shook his head.
"You don't know the future, Pads"
"It doesn't matter" Sirius spat "Okay, we might break up or things might change... But not my love for you..."
Remus was silent.
"I am certain that what I feel for you will never leave me. Even if we break up or break apart or whatever. Even if I say I hate you, I will still love you. Even if it ends, this would be the proof that our love was real and I was the happiest man alive. We are the moon and the stars. We belong together. In every universe. Even if in this one it might not work. It will work in another. Our love goes beyond that. So no, I won't regret it. Will you?"
"God, Sirius. I love you so much!" Remus kissed him fiercely "Yes! Let's do it. I love you" Another kiss.
Not only Sirius got the snog and shag of his life that day but Remus was utterly convinced of getting the tattoos. They went to the tattoo studio the next day.
James and Sirius in their pajamas, sitting in the dark on the kitchen counter of Potter Manor. Because Sirius had another nightmare that led to a pretty bad episode, and to be honest James doesnât really know what do but heâs trying his best.
Theyâre drinking hot cocoa, swinging their feet and whispering so they donât wake Effie and Monty. Siriusâ eyes still sting, and his hands shake a little around the mug, but at least heâs got James Potter as a best friend. Thatâs more that he could ever deserve.
peter's youtube video starts with him explaining the challenge: his three friends have to bake a cake, but remus can't see, sirius can't hear and james can't speak, which already sounds like a terrible idea considering these three should probably not be trusted with a kitchen under normal circumstances.
within the first few minutes, sirius is practically screaming at everyone because he can't hear a single thing, remus is screaming back because he thinks sirius is screaming at him, meanwhile james is stuck between them with his mouth taped shut, desperately trying to communicate through increasingly dramatic hand gestures.
sirius keeps turning to james whenever he needs instructions, apparently forgetting every five seconds that james is physically incapable of answering him, and james has to point aggressively at the recipe, trying to prevent a national disaster. unfortunately, sirius interprets half of his gestures wrong, while remus blindly reaches for whatever ingredient happens to be closest to his hand and trusts sirius to tell him what it is, which is possibly the worst decision he could have made.
at some point sirius confidently hands remus sugar instead of flour, remus pours the entire thing into the bowl, and james notices approximately three seconds too late. he just stands there staring at the mixture, looking like he has just realised that he is the only person in the room capable of understanding what is actually happening.
the situation only gets worse from there. flour ends up on the counter, the floor, sirius' hair and somehow on peter's camera, remus accidentally knocks over half the ingredients because he can't see where anything is, and sirius keeps smiling proudly because he genuinely believes they are doing an incredible job. james eventually starts laughing so hard that the tape over his mouth turns it into a series of completely incomprehensible muffled noises, which makes remus start laughing too even though he has absolutely no idea what is funny.
peter, meanwhile, is having the best day of his life and barely manages to keep the camera steady because he is laughing behind it so hard.
when the cake finally comes out of the oven, it looks less like a cake and more like something that should be studied by scientists.
the video ends with peter zooming in on the cake while sirius and remus are still arguing in the background, and james silently regrets every friendship that led him here
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daily affirmations: one day there will be a james to my sirius, a remus to my lily, a barty to my regulus, a marlene to my mary. one day there will be someone for me
James's body temperature is always warm or hot. He is that guy that always ends up taking off layers of clothes because he cannot stand them, even when the weather is cold. James feels more comfortable with a t-shirt and shorts. He even hates socks sometimes.
There is a storm outside? James is just wearing a tee and some shorts.
Peter is that kind of guy that has unexplainable stains on his hoodies. Paint? Food? Bleach? He doesn't know where the hell they come from but no matter how much he washes them those stains don't go away. He just wears them like that. He thinks they are part of his story.
Marlene McKinnon would be a vaping girl. Started smoking socially in her youth but mid twenties she discovered vaping and she became that girl that carries her vape around.
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Growing up, Marlene desperately wanted to be the daughter her parents wanted, the daughter her mother would be proud of. She wore pretty dresses and curled her hair and, after looking like a clown when she did it herself, let her mother do her makeup. She tried to be the perfect girl, dainty and meek and beautiful. But that never felt like her.Â
âHere, put this on,â James says as he walks her home after spending all day at his, taking his jacket off and handing it to her. He smiles when he notices her hesitation, âYou know I run hot, and I can see how much youâre shivering.âÂ
Marlene puts it on, oversized on James, but massive on her. But when she gets home, having forgotten to give it back to him, she looks in her bedroom mirror, the jacket hiding her silhouette, she canât help the wide grin that spreads across her face, liking the reflection staring back at her for the first time.Â
When she started Hogwarts, Marlene began to experiment with her style, borrowing jumpers from Remus, band tees from Sirius, crop tops from Mary. It took a while for her to go out in public wearing boyish clothes, not able to get over the idea she would be disappointing her parents, especially with being their only daughter. But she has never felt so comfortable in her body as when she wears baggy clothes, and the occasional cropped tank top. She has never felt so her.Â
As the years pass and she became more confident in how she presents herself, there was still the underlying feeling that no one would want her when she isnât the perfect feminine girl. But when Dorcas kissed her after a party, making her head spin for many reasonsâsheâs into girls too, Marlene thought she hated her after that mistake she made when they were paired together in potions and ended up getting them both detention for setting fire to their tableâwhat she found most surprising is that the most gorgeous woman in their year didnât find her too weird or unconventional. In fact, Dorcas admitted between short, sweet kisses that her confidence in being true to herself is one of the main things that she was initially attracted to.Â
From then on, Marlene vowed to always be true to herself, no matter what others may think of her.Â
