𝒎𝒂𝒓𝒊𝒆

it was one of those lazy afternoons where neither of you had anything important to do. the café was quiet, rain tapped softly against the windows, and somehow the conversation had drifted from movies to childhood stories to arguing over whether cereal counted as soup.

"satoru."

he tilted his head back to glance at you. "hm?"

"you've been weird all day."

"define weird."

"you're... quieter."

he gasped dramatically. "you think i'm quiet?"

"for you? absolutely."

he leaned back in his chair, folding his arms. "maybe i'm growing as a person."

"or maybe you're plotting something."

he pointed at you. "that one's closer."

you laughed. "i knew it."

the smile on his face softened. he liked making you laugh. more than he'd ever admit out loud.

the conversation faded after that, replaced by comfortable silence. it wasn't awkward. it never was. you'd always liked that about the two of you. there was never any pressure to fill every quiet moment.

you looked out the window, watching people hurry through the rain. "satoru?"

"yeah?"

"...can i ask you something?"

"you just did."

"..."

"..."

"...i'm taking your coffee."

he laughed.

"okay, okay. ask."

you turned back toward him. "have you ever actually been nervous?"

he raised an eyebrow. "about what?"

"anything."

he thought for a moment.

"yeah."

"really?" your mouth formed into a small ‘o’ shape, clearly not expecting him to actually admit to it.

"mhm."

"when?"

his fingers tapped lightly against the side of his cup. "...right now."

you frowned. "why?"

he looked at you for a long second before letting out a quiet laugh. "because i don't actually know how to do this."

"do what?"

another pause.

for once, satoru gojo looked... unsure. not scared. not anxious. just careful. like he was choosing every word before he said it.

"everyone thinks i'm confident."

you nodded. "you are."

"most of the time."

he quietly sighed, not prepared for this conversation. "but there's one thing confidence can't really help with."

you tilted your head. "what's that?"

he looked down at his hands. then back at you. "asking someone something when the answer actually matters."

your heartbeat stumbled. "...oh."

"yeah."

neither of you spoke. the rain outside only grew louder. gojo rubbed the back of his neck, letting out an awkward laugh.

"this is probably the first time i've ever overthought something."

"that's... kind of impressive."

"don't make fun of me."

"I'm not."

"you smiled."

"because you're being cute."

he groaned dramatically. "don't say that."

"why?"

"makes this harder."

you couldn't help smiling wider. "satoru."

"hm?"

"what are you trying to ask me?"

he took a slow breath. then met your eyes.

"can i kiss you?"

just like that. no jokes. no teasing. no cocky grin. just a simple question. asked so quietly you almost missed it. your heart felt impossibly light.

"you've been thinking about that all day?"

he looked away. "...maybe."

"and you were nervous?"

"terrified."

you laughed softly. "you? terrified?"

"don't tell anybody."

"i'll consider it."

he smiled. "...so?"

you leaned forward slightly. "you really needed to ask?"

"i wanted to."

"why?"

his answer came without hesitation. "because i wanted your answer."

not an assumption. not a guess. not a moment he hoped you'd go along with. your answer.

you felt your smile grow. "then..." you reached across the table, gently taking his hand. "...yes."

the grin that spread across his face was brighter than anything you'd seen all day. "yeah?"

"yeah."

he stood, walked around the table, and stopped beside your chair. "still okay?"

you nodded. his hand rested lightly against your cheek. he was being careful. like you were something precious.

he gave you one last chance to pull away. you didn't.

he leaned in closer before closing his eyes, pressing his lips against yours. you mimicked his action, closing your eyes as well. almost immediately, a small blush formed on your cheeks.

the kiss was brief. soft. warm. when he pulled back, the biggest smile you'd ever seen was waiting for you.

"...worth stressing over?" you teased.

he laughed, resting his forehead against yours. "absolutely."

"dramatic."

"you like it."

"...maybe a little."

he smiled. "good."

outside, the rain still hadn't stopped.

inside, neither of you minded waiting a little longer before heading home.

"i'm not plotting anything," i murmured, my cheeks getting hot just because he was standing near me. "just waiting for my friend to finish... whatever she's doing on the dance floor."

toji took a sip from his cup, his dark eyes tracking the flush on my neck. "right. well, she’s currently doing shots of questionable tequila. you're going to be waiting a while."

he shifted closer, his arm brushing against mine. the heat radiating off him was normal but it always made my heart do a stupid, dangerous flip. i hated how shy i got around him, especially considering how well we knew each other behind closed doors.

"so," he leaned down a little, dropping his voice so the random freshmen by the fridge couldn't hear. "you look miserable. want to get out of here?"

my stomach did a backflip. "toji, we're not supposed to leave together. people will talk."

he just rolled his eyes, reaching down to tap his knuckles against mine. a tiny gesture, but it felt like an electric shock. "let 'em talk. my car is out front. five minutes?"

and because i have zero self-control when it comes to him, i just nodded.

twenty minutes later, we were parked in the far corner of the campus lot, the engine of toji's beat-up car still idling quietly. the heater was blasting, cutting through the chill of the night, and the only light came from the dim orange glow of a distant streetlamp.

i was staring out the passenger window, clutching my empty red cup like a security blanket, entirely aware of how close he was sitting.

"you're doing it again," toji said, pulling his hood off. his dark hair was a messy, rumpled disaster from the party, and he looked way too attractive for someone who lived off cheap beer and protein shakes.

"doing what?" i asked, keeping my voice soft.

"hiding inside your own head." he shifted in his seat, turning his torso toward me. he reached over, his large, calloused hand gently wrapping around the plastic cup in my grip and pulling it away. he tossed it into the backseat. "you don't have to be shy with me. we're way past that."

my face caught fire. "it's different in public. at the house, everyone was looking at you. and then you just... walked up to me."

toji let out a low, huffing laugh, leaning back against his headrest. "let them look. i wanted to talk to you. is that a crime?"

"it's against the rules," i reminded him, looking down at my lap. "rule number three. we don't act like anything changed."

the car went quiet for a second. the only sound was the low hum of the vents. i risked a glance at him and caught him staring at me, his expression uncharacteristically serious. the playful, smug frat boy exterior had completely vanished.

"maybe the rules are stupid," he muttered, reaching out. his thumb brushed against my jawline, his touch surprisingly gentle for someone so intimidating. "maybe i'm tired of pretending i don't see you when we pass each other on the quad."

my breath hitched. "toji..."

"i'm serious," he said, his voice dropping an octave, completely stripping away my defense mechanisms. "friends with benefits was your idea because you thought i'd get bored. but i'm pretty sure i'm the one losing my mind here."

i stared at him, my heart hammering against my ribs so hard i was convinced he could hear it over the sound of the car heater.

"you're losing your mind?" i repeated, my voice barely a whisper.

toji let out another low, dry laugh, but it didn't sound smug this time. it sounded almost tired. his thumb stayed resting against my jaw, his skin warm and slightly rough against mine.

"yeah," he said, looking right into my eyes. "i am. i go to these stupid parties, i look around the room, and the only person i actually want to talk to is the one girl i'm supposed to ignore."

he leaned in a little closer, his gaze dropping to my lips for a split second before snapping back up.

"i tried playing along with the whole 'no strings attached' thing because i thought it was what you wanted," he continued, his tone softer than i'd ever heard it. "but seeing you standing in that kitchen tonight, looking like you wanted to disappear, and knowing i wasn't supposed to walk up and take you out of there? it sucked."

i swallowed hard, my hands knotting into the fabric of my skirt. "toji, i only made those rules because... because you're you. everyone knows who you are. you could have anyone on this campus. i didn't want to get attached and end up being just another person to you."

toji’s eyebrows furrowed, a faint look of disbelief crossing his face. "just another person? are you kidding me?"

he moved his hand from my jaw, his fingers sliding up into my hair, gently tilting my head back so i couldn't look away from him.

"i don't sneak into anyone else's room at 2:00 am," he said, each word deliberate and heavy. "i don't stay awake until sunrise just talking to anyone else. i don't hold anyone else's hand. it's only you."

the sincerity in his voice completely stripped away the last of my defenses. all the insecurity, the shyness, the constant worrying about what other people would say—it just evaporated in the heat of his car.

"so," i breathed, a small, tentative smile finally breaking through. "what does that mean for the rules?"

toji’s lips twitched upward into that familiar, devastating smirk, the heavy tension in the car instantly lifting.

"the rules are canceled," he murmured, his face inches from mine. "starting right now."

and then he finally leaned in and kissed me.

it wasn't like the hurried, secret kisses in the dark of my dorm room either. it was slow, heavy, and completely grounded, like he was trying to prove to me that he meant every single word he just said. his hand was still tangled in my hair, holding me close, and i completely melted against him, my hands automatically finding the front of his worn-out hoodie.

when he pulled back just a fraction, his forehead rested against mine, both of us breathing a little shallow.

"so," i whispered, my voice shaking a little but in a good way. "does this mean you're actually going to walk me to class on monday? in front of everyone?"

toji let out that low, rumbling laugh that vibrated straight through his chest. "yeah. i'll carry your backpack too if it means people stop trying to talk to you."

"shut up," i laughed, pushing at his shoulder, but he just caught my wrist and held it there, his thumb rubbing over my pulse point.

"i'm serious," he murmured, his eyes looking incredibly dark and soft in the dim orange glow of the streetlamp. "no more hiding. if your friend asks where you went tonight, you tell her you're with me."

my stomach did another one of those ridiculous flips, but for the first time, it wasn't from anxiety. it was just pure, unfiltered relief. the rules were completely dead, and honestly? good riddance.

"okay," i said softly, leaning back into his space. "i'll tell her."

toji smirked, pulling me back in by my waist. "good. now come here."

instead, you smiled and let him walk into your apartment like it was his home.

because part of you already believed it was.

your friends called him your boyfriend.

your coworkers called him your boyfriend.

even the elderly woman downstairs smiled every time she saw the two of you and said,

"you two make such a lovely couple."

neither of you ever corrected her.

so you assumed.

that was your second mistake.

it happened at shoko's birthday dinner.

nothing dramatic.

nothing explosive.

just one sentence.

"how long have you two been together now?" geto asked casually, sipping his drink.

you looked up from your plate.

toji shrugged.

"we're not together."

the conversation stopped.

not completely.

just enough.

just enough for you to hear the silence before someone awkwardly changed the subject.

you looked at him.

he looked completely normal.

like he hadn't just knocked the air out of your lungs.

you laughed.

because what else were you supposed to do?

"yeah," you said quietly.

"we're not."

the ride home was silent.

toji drove with one hand on the wheel.

you stared out the window.

he noticed.

"you alright?"

"mhm."

"you're quiet."

"just tired."

he accepted that answer.

of course he did.

because he didn't know.

he couldn't know.

you'd never told him.

after that, everything changed.

or maybe...

you just started noticing things that had always been there.

he'd kiss your forehead before leaving for work.

then disappear for two days without answering his phone.

he'd spend the night wrapped around you like he couldn't sleep without you.

then introduce you as "a friend."

he'd tell you to text him when you got home safely.

but never once call you his.

every sweet moment suddenly had a question attached to it.

if he loved me... why won't he say i'm his?

"you're avoiding me."

you looked up from your book.

toji was standing in your kitchen.

he still had a key.

you'd forgotten to ask for it back.

"am i?"

"yeah."

you shrugged.

"been busy."

"bullshit."

you looked away.

"watch your language."

he let out a dry laugh.

"there you are."

normally, you would've smiled.

this time, you didn't.

his expression shifted.

"...what's wrong?"

you closed your book.

"nothing."

"don't lie."

you stood.

"i'm not."

"you've barely answered my texts all week."

"i know."

"why?"

because hearing your phone buzz and seeing his name pop up hurt.

because every message reminded you that he could memorize your coffee order but not commit to calling you his girlfriend.

because you were exhausted.

instead, you asked the question you'd been swallowing for months.

"...what am i to you?"

toji frowned.

"what?"

"what am i?"

he looked genuinely confused.

"you're y/n."

you laughed.

it sounded awful.

"that's not what i meant."

he stayed quiet.

so you kept talking.

"you sleep here."

"yeah."

"you have a key."

"yeah."

"you know my family."

"yeah."

"you hold my hand."

"...yeah."

your voice cracked despite your best efforts.

"then why did you tell everyone we aren't together?"

toji stared at you.

"because..."

he hesitated.

"...we never said we were."

and there it was.

the answer.

simple.

honest.

devastating.

you nodded slowly.

"you're right."

his shoulders relaxed, like he'd said the correct thing.

you hated that.

"we never did."

he took a step closer.

"y/n—"

"don't."

he stopped.

you looked at him, and for the first time since you'd met him...

he looked nervous.

"i thought..." you whispered.

"...i thought we didn't need to."

he didn't answer.

because he didn't have one.

because he'd never thought about it.

not the way you had.

he found his hoodie folded neatly on your couch.

his charger beside it.

the spare key resting on top.

"what's this?"

"your things."

"why?"

you looked at him.

"because they're yours."

his jaw tightened.

"...don't do this."

"do what?"

"push me away."

you smiled sadly.

"i'm not pushing you away."

you walked over and placed the key in his hand.

"i'm just giving you back the distance you wanted."

his fingers closed around the metal.

"...that's not—"

"you said we're not together."

your voice stayed calm.

too calm.

"so i don't think you should have a key to my apartment anymore."

he looked down at it.

then back at you.

"...is that really what this is about?"

you almost laughed.

"you think it's about the key?"

he opened his mouth.

closed it again.

because for the first time...

he realized he had no idea what to say.

after he left, your apartment was painfully quiet.

his mug was still in the drying rack.

his sweatshirt still smelled like him.

there was an empty space by the front door where his shoes always ended up.

you sat on the couch and cried until your head hurt.

not because he never loved you.

that would've been easier.

you cried because maybe he did.

just not in the way you needed him to.

and sometimes...

that hurt even more.

toji fushiguro

suguru geto

kento namami

hiromi higuruma

choso kamo

megumi fushiguro

ryomen sukuna

bro i SWEARRR yuji was apart of this but my phone decided to be a fricking idiot and made the messages mess up. and i did yuji right before sukuna’s so don’t mind a couple of wonky stuff 🥺🥺 also the backstory behind this picture is this text

before the cashier could answer, the front door chimed.

speak of the devil.

toji walked in with one hand in his pocket and glanced around the café before spotting you.

"hey."

you pointed at the sign.

"...care to explain?"

he looked at it.

"..."

"...that's still up?"

you slowly turned your head toward him. "still?"

he rubbed the back of his neck. "thought they'd have taken it down by now."

"toji."

"what?"

"what did you do?"

the cashier raised her hand. "would you like the short version or the long version?"

you didn't even hesitate. "the long one."

toji sighed. "...seriously?"

"you've clearly earned it."

the cashier smiled. "it started about three months ago. he came in every morning and ordered the exact same thing."

"large black coffee," toji muttered.

"correct."

"okay...?"

"the problem wasn't the coffee."

"then what was it?"

the cashier looked directly at toji. "he kept reaching over the counter to grab his own lid."

toji blinked. "they're right there."

"...because employees are supposed to hand them to customers."

"that seems inefficient."

you let out a small scoff, bringing a hand up to your forehead. "toji."

"what?"

"after we asked him to stop..."

the cashier reached under the register and pulled out a laminated sheet.

it read:

please do not reach behind the counter.

you stared.

"...you made a sign because of him?"

"we had to."

toji looked offended. "one sign."

the cashier looked at you. "and he ignored it!"

"oh…." you said, trying not to laugh. "that's not ban-worthy."

"oh, we're not done."

you covered your face. "there's more?"

the cashier nodded.

"a customer asked if he worked here."

you looked at toji.

"..."

"...don't."

"toji."

"..."

"...i said yes."

"WHY?"

"they already started asking me questions."

"you could've said you didn't work here."

"felt rude."

the cashier jumped in. "he spent ten minutes helping people find things."

you tilted your head, furrowing your brows in slight confusion. "but that's... nice?"

"he was confidently wrong."

toji frowned.

"i wasn't that wrong."

"you sent someone looking for oat milk in the pet food aisle."

"..."

"...close enough."

"toji!"

by this point, you were crying laughing.

he looked at you.

"you're supposed to be on my side."

"i'm trying."

"you're failing."

"i know."

the cashier wasn't finished.

"then came the sugar packets."

toji immediately looked away.

"..."

you didn’t even bother to hide your amused expression at this point. "how many?"

"guess."

"ten?"

"..."

"twenty?"

"..."

"...toji."

"they're free."

"HOW MANY?"

"...thirty."

the cashier coughed.

"thirty-eight."

"same difference."

"that's an entire box!"

"i was gonna use them."

"for what?"

he shrugged.

"coffee."

"for the next six months?"

"inflation."

you stared at him.

"you don't even put sugar in your coffee."

"..."

"it was for you ."

the cashier laughed.

"after that, the manager decided enough was enough."

she pointed to the picture again.

"so now..."

🚫 do not serve until supervised by girlfriend 🚫

you blinked.

"...wait."

you walked closer.

"...that's what it says?"

toji looked at the sign.

"..."

"...they changed it."

the cashier smiled proudly.

"last week."

"why?"

she looked at you.

"because every time he comes in with you..."

she gestured toward toji.

"...he behaves."

you slowly turned to your boyfriend.

"am i basically your parole officer?"

"looks like it."

you laughed so hard you had to grab the counter for support. "i cannot believe this."

toji looked genuinely confused. "i still think they're overreacting."

the cashier slid your usual drink onto the counter. "watch this."

she looked at toji. "would you like any sugar?"

toji opened his mouth.

you gave him a look.

"..."

"...no."

"napkins?"

he glanced at you again.

"...one."

the cashier smiled.

"see?"

you shook your head.

"he's house-trained."

"barely," she replied.

toji sighed dramatically.

"you all act like i'm some kind of menace."

at that exact moment, he absentmindedly reached behind the counter to grab a straw.

three employees shouted in unison.

"STOP?!"

he froze.

"...right."

slowly, he put the straw back.

"...old habits."

you buried your face in his shoulder, laughing so hard you could barely breathe.

toji looked down at you, a tiny smile tugging at his lips.

"...my bad."

"no," you sighed.

"absolutely not."

he leaned down just enough for only you to hear.

"...you're still buying me a cinnamon roll though, right?"

you looked up at him.

"after everything i just learned?"

"especially after everything you just learned."

you sighed even louder.

"...fine."

a grin spread across his face.

the cashier groaned. "great, now he's rewarded."

toji took your hand as the two of you walked toward the pickup counter.

"...see?"

he said.

"being banned isn't so bad."

you looked at him.

"you're unbelievable."

"yeah."

he squeezed your hand.

"...but you still like me."

"...unfortunately."

"good enough."