Mr Steal Yo Gender

i recently found out what the * * * that sometimes separates parts of a text is called and youre never gonna fucking believe it

The key to writing good fanfiction is to harbor a deeply humiliating desire, and the trick there is that even pretty basic and societally-accepted desires like “being held” and “being wanted” CAN and WILL be humiliating if they’re intense enough. Become so estranged from human connection that the idea of someone playing with your hair fills you with yearning so deep you feel like you’re going to throw up and you will write some banger fanfiction. It might have some other consequences too but idrk about that.

You gotta be really publicly passionate about things if you want your friends to text you. Bc people will forget to text you because they’re human. But if you’re really openly the friend who loves identifying ants your friends will think of you when they see ants. And they’ll text you “what ant is this [blurry photo]”. And then they’ll ask you how you’ve been and we should get coffee sometime. But if they don’t know what you love they’ll never know what you like

And then when the ant convention is in town they’ll be like dude… we should go to the ant convention. But they would never think to go if they didn’t know u loved ants

And sometimes you need to ask them to go to the ant convention. But you Will not get anywhere hiding your passions

I really wish goyim would stop gaslighting us about our own history. "Jewish people have never had a specific homeland" is unequivocally false, and yet I have seen someone making this claim today. Judaism is a land-based tradition, and, this is very important, Jews are not, and have never been, nomads.

And also, even if the Jews were nomadic, nomadic peoples can very much still have a land that they are native to. Nomads need land to actually be nomadic on. Like sure, maybe I'm not always in the kitchen, but it's my fucking kitchen.

i love the french, i love the way they pronounce Rs like they're disgusted with them

the english meanwhile seem to have developed some sort of phobia about them

Huh. Didn't know you could have French surgically removed.

sorry i just cannot get this out of my head. Like, "oh you speak french? i hear there's an operation for that"

I love how code Lyoko is such a dark show in theory but they keep it lighthearted in the fact that the characters just brush over it constantly. Carthage was a military operation meant to- oh wait ok let's just fast forward past that it's not important. Oh Aelita just made a literal suicide attempt oh wait we need to get to Lyoko let's brush that off and never address it

Anyone who cleans public restrooms should automatically make $100/hr

can’t believe I had to read this with my own balls

good-ness gra-cious, dark balls of si-ight

thanks this is part of an even grander incomprehensibleness than I could have expected

I cannot believe that this is a website where you can ask “hey i think i saw a weird image once” and put a bad stick figure drawing of it and someone will be like “oh yeah that’s the first installment of a 12-part post-ironic apocalypse fever dream photoshop series” and just hand you a dozen of the most unhinged images you’ve ever seen in your life, that still have a better three act structure than most modern cinema

As they should be. Can’t make paradise without scrambling a few universes.

Official ominous sign(s)

Girl help I got sucked into the Ryan Gosling cinematic universe and now I’m realizing he’s a genuinely good actor whose performances got overshadowed by people’s sexual perception of him as opposed to his actual talent

they should invent a body that feels normal to be inside of