My Pain, My Thoughts, My Outlet

Yesterday I bought groceries with my boyfriend and with each item of food I thought to myself “Do we really need granola bars for breakfast? I don’t think I need it” When we finished at the register, our total was nearly $200. I suddenly felt a sick pain in my stomach, but I hid my pain. In my mind, I was totaling the rest of the bills, including rent that we needed to pay. Once we got our groceries in the car, my boyfriend finally started his tally of bills to pay. I could tell when he realized we probably went a little overboard with groceries, but what could we do? They were already paid for and we need food. Driving home, my boyfriend asked what was wrong. I clearly wasn’t hiding my depression at this point. I told him I was worried about money. I haven’t been working a second job in a while so we haven’t had the extra income to help with bills. Most of our money goes towards our rent and food. I feel partially responsible for not being able to provide. My boyfriend understood that I haven’t worked my second job because the owners have terrible communication skills and I have been losing trust in the company. My boyfriend assured me that I shouldn’t worry and everything would be okay in the end. Just hearing that from him helped a lot, but when I think about our situation more, I think to myself that maybe we can’t make it this month.