MOXIE RULES

October 6th marked my 100th day of self-employment. (applause)

I had the honor of spending the past three days at the Inc. 500/5000 Conference and Awards Ceremony at the JW Marriott in Phoenix, AZ. Although my companies are a long way from making this exclusive list, I still felt right at home amongst some of the best business minds in the world.

I was selected by Inc. (for the second time) as one of 25 Military Entrepreneur Delegates to attend the conference. As a delegate, I was paired with an Inc. 500/5000 CEO mentor and received personalized advice on my personal goals, business model and ways to advance my business.

At the conference, there was a lineup of dynamic speakers. For me, Simon Sinek’s words spoke the loudest. Simon spoke about his latest book Start With Why. This book offers an unconventional perspective that explains WHY some people and organizations are more innovative, more profitable, command greater loyalties and are able to repeat their success over and over.

Buckled in my window seat with my leopard blanket and neck wrap, I started reading Start With Why and began to ask myself, WHY do I do what I do?

I concluded that there are three things that, if I had waited until the “perfect” time, I never would have done.  Marry a Marine, become a mother, and start a business. And yet, if asked where I get the most pleasure and satisfaction in my life at this very moment, it’s creating memories with those exact three things – my husband, my daughter and my business.

I do what I do because I love creating memories. My love for tutu’s began one day when I taught my daughter how to make a tutu for fun. As she wore her first tutu I saw her dance around the house in pure happiness. I soon realized that the happiness it brought to her could be replicated in many ways. 

On any given day, I make the day of some little girl, as she gets dressed for her birthday celebration. On any given day, I become an honorary member of the wedding party as the flower girl prances down the aisle in her fluffy white tutu. On any given day I have a front row seat to that little girl’s first ballet recital or a backstage pass to her first leading role in a school play. On any given day, I create many "My First" moments. All of which will be remembered, photographed and cherished forever.

As my plane prepares to land and I think about my daughter greeting me at the terminal dressed in her favorite tutu and a big smile, I can’t help but wonder what memories are we creating now.

Wait, it’s not what you think, LOL. For me, this time of year is like a week of Christmas eves. The kiddos start school and every retail store vow to fulfill your every back-to-school need at a fraction of the cost. This is the only time of year I get to satisfy my craving for school supplies. In particular, yellow No. 2 pencils.

As a kid, I vividly remember the anticipation of back-to-school shopping. First came new clothes. I always had the latest digs and was quiet the trendsetter before I could even spell trendsetter. Second came the new JanSport backpack. This was my staple piece because in my household, you only got one backpack a year. Last came new school supplies. Yes, fresh sheets of white notebook paper; the perfect 5-star three-ring binder with the right amount of pockets, and of course my yellow No. 2 pencils.

I wasn’t into the colorful scented pencils in assorted flavors. Or the neon pencils with the fuzzy tops. Or even the themed pencils to rep my favorite superhero. I just didn’t get it! I didn’t understand why anyone wanted to remix the good ole yellow No. 2 pencil.

I admit I was a little old school for a young school. I wanted my trusted No. 2’s. After all, my No. 2's were like my No. 1's -- my uno, my first. They were with me when I wrote my first word; when I finally wrote my name in cursive; when I wrote my first diary entry; when I copied my first note in class from a transparency projected on the concrete wall; and even when I gave my telephone number to a boy for the very first time.

So as I humorously “type” this post LOL, I am quickly reminded of how my crisp sheets of white paper have been replaced with an electronic device and my trusted wooden pencil replaced with a Stylus Titanium Pencil. However, no touch screen can capture the true pencil-to-paper deliverance; no backspace key can replace the lesson in erasing mistakes and starting over; and no wanna be writing utensil can replace the fresh wooden scent of pure creativity.   

Oh, how I miss going No. 2....A tribute to you No. 2!

For more than 100 years, the first Monday in September — Labor Day — has included local community parades, backyard bar-b-ques and most importantly, a day off from work. I often peg Labor Days as the end of the summer season. This is usually when I attend my last bar-b-que; take the last summer vacation with the family, and disobey the old fashion rule of not wearing white after Labor Day.

However you choose to spend your Labor Day, don’t forget to take a moment to think about why we celebrate it in the first place. Labor Day is a day to celebrate the economic and social contributions of American workers. And while the working class is certainly deserving of this honor, I also think it's fitting to honor our women entrepreneurs for all their hard work.

As our economy changes, entrepreneurial women are emerging as leaders of various industries, bringing significant, fresh ideas to the marketplace. Here's a great infograph by American Express OPEN that tells their stories, reveal their challenges and inspire you with their successes.

My first 30 days of self-employment went by fast. There were days I felt like I was playing the lead role in a Shonda Rhimes dramatic sitcom. There were other days full of doubt, disappointment, confusion and disarray.

What I've learned about myself is that I'm rare. I don’t mean that in a "Kim Kardashian tweeting swimsuit photos of herself" vain kind of way. What I mean is I haven’t met many people that share the same goals; willing to take enormous risks; willing to work extremely hard today for rewards which are years away; and really believe to the core, that what they are doing is life changing.

I'm not saying that to say what others are doing isn't just as important. I'm simply saying it just isn't for me. How did I arrive to this point? Two years ago I left a great job for what I thought was going to be an even better job. I realized within the first month the grass wasn’t greener on the other side. The work I was doing was minuscule. My opinion wasn’t valued. I was often mischaracterized and prejudged by others. I was completely underutilized. I didn’t understand the work culture, nor did I give a damn to understand it at that point.  During my 20-month prison sentence, I began to plan my exit strategy. I started taking care of myself, reaching out to "like-minded" professionals, and making my goals a priority to ensure that when I decided to chuck up the deuces, it would be well worth it. How could I be so sure? It’s simple. If I took the time to water my own grass, it would be just as green.

Success as an entrepreneur requires an extremely rare mélange of self-confidence and the willingness to fail and the resiliency to self-correct. When you become an entrepreneur, nothing is given to you. The people you meet are 10 times more judgmental. The decisions you make are 20 times more difficult; and the relationships you build are 30 times more important.

What I know for sure?

With any level of success come haters. Everyone will have an opinion about you. What was once a mere admiration from others, quickly turned into an aversion of hate, envy and asininity. “It’s not like she’s going to make millions”; “She doesn’t create jobs, so her business doesn’t count”; “Anyone can do what she’s doing”.  Truth moment - Misery loves company.  Just because someone chooses to work on the farm instead of owning the farm is the fault of their own.

What I know for sure?

You don't get to walk around wearing a cape with a big "S" on your chest. No one cares about your struggle and your story more than you do. No one cares about your success and triumphs more than you do. No one will throw you a party to thank you for contributing to the economy. You are thanked with a higher tax bill.

What I know for sure?

Criticism comes with the territory. Embrace it. Having a great idea is a must. Hearing negative feedback about your great idea is mandatory. I used to brush off criticism from others and go on about my business. I've learned you can't create the perfect product without negative feedback. Truth moment - if you have a great idea and you present it to someone, and they immediately like it with no hesitation – it’s not that great of an idea. Shopping for criticism is always at the top of my to do list. It gives me the ability to test my future product with future customers for free before I actually invest my money into developing a product.

Overall, I’ve learned to be smarter, more resourceful and more decisive. I’ve learned that my thoughts affect my business decisions and my ability to succeed, expand and profit. I’ve subscribed to the "failure is not an option" mindset; and I model myself after successful people. I speak only of success. I don't want to be broke so why speak of it. My grass is looking pretty green right about now.....How's your grass looking?