no body

Aries: Success follows the sound of bells. It is quite possible you are a dirty bell thief.

Taurus: If you are tired you must rest. Demand a nap from the world. Fall asleep midsentence so you topple over on someone annoying.

Gemini: Tread carefully Gemini, you are in uncharted, and unexpectedly slippery, territory.

Cancer: Give a kid a longsword. Fuck it. Life is short.

Leo: Improvisation is for those who fail to plan. Thats nice, but when in the history of ever has anything gone to plan?

Virgo: Seem one way, be another. Its all an intricate dance. Eventually someone will find out that you are being piloted by a living fungus you got from eating snails.

Libra: What you seek is taking a day off today.

Scorpio: Win the respect of strangers! Travel only by rollerskate and sled-dog.

Ophiuchus: Flowers grow from old wounds. This is not a metaphor. It will consume you.

Sagittarius: Methinks the lady doth ingest too much. They’ll start to notice the missing children.

Capricorn: Love will come trickling from the ceiling like a broken pipe through drywall.

Aquarius: Yes the park is a pubic space, but your tiddies are not.