FIC IN PROGRESS: Dreamcatcher (multiple chapters, not sure how many yet; will post them all at once when finished).
FICS PLANNED: All of my other WIPs, then Endangered 2 / Data Deficient (a written continuation of the VN), then Endangered 3 (which will be a very long writing project). I'll be real -- it's been many years since I went on hiatus, and apart from Endangered, I've only got an outline for Fatal Error, so I'm gonna be mostly improvising the others. Also there's a DirkJake Dead Space AU I started working on and would like to finish if/when I get around to it. <3
Here's a list of my sideblogs.
Mortic: For Sonic the Hedgehog content.
Exmortia: For Critical Role content.
Mettamort: For Undertale and Deltarune content.
Mordoubt: General (non-fandom & misc. fandom) sideblog.
Mortior on AO3: For my fics and ficlets.
Mortior on Bluesky (I don't use Twitter anymore, but it's here if anyone still wants it).
My off-topic text post tag across all of these is "mtext". I'm neurospicy with a very very very bad memory and might take an embarrassingly long time to reply to asks / messages, so apologies in advance. (If I don't reply in like,,, a month, pls feel free to re-send).
FAQ for antis under the cut:
(FYI: In this post, “censorship” refers only to censorship of artwork and/or fiction. It does not refer to real-life criminal acts, explicit or disturbing photographs, hate speech / advocating harm to real living people, etc. It also refers only to artwork and/or fiction in adult-content-compatible spaces, e.g., not on websites for children. No, Tumblr is not a website for children; it openly allows mature content.)
Hi, I’m a CSA survivor with PTSD. I’m also trans, aspec, have ADHD and ASD, and grew up in a religiously oppressive family and community. I don’t usually list my “credentials” like this, but it seems to matter for some.
What is pro-shipping / pro-fiction?
Pro-shipping (i.e., the opposite of being an anti-shipper) means that I believe in creative freedom and artistic expression, and that I am against the censorship of artwork and fiction in adult fandom spaces. That’s all. (If you think it’s a synonym for pdf, it’s not; but you can thank Tumblr’s censorship for making it so people can’t use certain words anymore.)
My generation fought for a decade-plus to create fandom spaces that were free from the persecution and oppression of the 90’s and early 00’s, back when queer ships were demonized just as heavily as “problematic” ships are today -- back when drawing a picture of two male cartoon characters kissing (or even holding hands and blushing at each other) was enough to get you blocked, harassed, and banned from websites for “inappropriate content.” (No, I am not exaggerating, and I envy anyone who doesn’t believe me. You are naive in the good way, because nobody should have to grow up like we did.) This is why the original pillars of fandom etiquette are "ship and let ship" and "don't like, don't read.”
Why can’t you just go somewhere else?
Because it’s not just about me.
The tagging system for user-generated content is how we protect ourselves and curate our experiences. Site-wide, blanket censorship (like what Tumblr does for specific words / tags) does not prevent that type of content from existing. Instead, it causes people to omit certain tags or use alternate tags, which makes it impossible to filter out content without having to see it first before manually blocking every new user who posts it. Ultimately, this makes everyone less safe, and makes it impossible even for me to avoid my own triggers. In case you’re new to this term or you’ve only been exposed to the watered-down version, a PTSD trigger is something that makes me want to “check out early,” kms, etc. It forces me to re-live the memories and feelings of my trauma, which (without therapeutic techniques) also causes them to get worse and worse, until they are life-threatening.
Since Tumblr started censoring certain words, I’ve had to see exponentially more things that disgust, disturb, and trigger me. Back when people were allowed to tag their posts properly, I didn’t even have to think about it. People who didn’t tag things properly learned quickly, due to the negative backlash. People who still didn’t tag things properly got blocked <- this was rare. Nowadays, I don’t blame people for not tagging things properly, when it’s not always clear which words will get your post automatically hidden and your blog potentially shadowbanned. I don’t blame the users; I blame Tumblr for creating an unsafe environment for people like me and for others who need to avoid certain topics and concepts. Site-wide censorship makes the tag blacklist feature almost useless for this purpose.
Conversely, AO3 and e621 (and the Tumblr parable about the dog park) are great examples of how tagging systems require the absence of censorship to ensure that offensive and disturbing content are properly labeled site-wide. The reason AO3 in particular is so popular and trustworthy is because the lack of censorship allows user-generated content to be reliably tagged, searched, and filtered / avoided, which makes it safe.
Isn't that glorifying / promoting harmful behavior?
Depicting something is not the same as glorifying or promoting it. Dubious consent is one of the most common (and widely shared / enjoyed) “kinks” in fanart, and yet it’s still legally rape. When a fanartist draws a picture with dubcon or noncon, or of cartoon characters engaging in physical assault or emotional abuse, they are not “glorifying” or “promoting” harmful behavior, because everyone understands that it’s not real, and that creating or enjoying a drawing does not translate into real-world harm. This should be obvious, but there’s a very concerning double-standard these days, regarding some of the more taboo kinks / ships. Those of us who enjoy those kinks and ships are operating under the exact same understanding. We don’t glorify, condone, or promote it irl, and it’s bizarre and confusing that so many young fans don’t seem to grasp that. Personally, I suspect it comes from a lack of comfort and understanding around kink in general, which is probably a side-effect of the “advertiser-friendly” corporate sanitization of the internet in recent years, but I digress.
Recently, the Twitter-alternative, Bluesky, decided to ban artwork that depicts non-consensual sex. This is the natural progression of the anti mindset. When something can’t be depicted because it’s bad irl, then bad things irl cannot be depicted. Rape is bad and illegal, so drawings of rape get censored. (I could list off all the other bad things in the world that should get censored, following that logic, but I’ve made my point.) Furthermore, it’s impossible to moderate without either mostly not enforcing it (which seems to be their current approach) or catching unrelated artwork in the crossfire (which Tumblr did, back when they banned nsfw and everyone’s sfw posts were also getting flagged and deleted). It doesn’t work.
But what about people who get off on it?
I don’t believe in thoughtcrime, and neither should you. It’s none of my business what goes on in other peoples’ imaginations, or in the privacy of their own homes when they’re alone, drawing pictures, writing words, or looking at someone else’s drawings and words. If the thought of that happening is so upsetting and unbearable to you, I would instead encourage you to seek therapy, rather than advocate for censorship of artwork. I’d also like to share the fact that, while I enjoy very specific, fictional, animated / illustrated, adult gay sibling-incest ships, irl incest is actually my biggest trigger, and encountering it in the context of real people or actors (including comedy) often makes me want to die. It stops being hot the nanosecond it becomes real. This is true for most people who engage in taboo kinks, which has always been (or was, until recently) widely understood, before this new wave of moral panic happened.
The grand, overwhelming majority of those who enjoy dark themes in fiction (e.g., violence, emotional abuse, forbidden relationships, etc.) are normal people with a fully-functional sense of right and wrong. Those who aren't, will commit harmful / criminal acts in real life regardless of whether or not someone writes fanfiction or draws fanart. Censoring art does not prevent bad people from doing bad things. Witnessing dark themes in fiction does not erase and rewire a person’s morals. If you believe that it does, and you’re not against depictions of fictional violence in books, movies, video games, etc., then you’re a hypocrite; I’m sorry, but it’s true. People who lack empathy (criminals, abusers, etc.) will inevitably get their problematic ideas and inspiration from anywhere and everywhere, including Hollywood media, real-world events, and whatever their own imaginations come up with. Sanitizing and purifying fan-spaces does not prevent immoral people from doing immoral things; but what it does do is harm (mostly queer and neurodivergent) people for thoughtcrimes and escapism.
The Discord alternative, Fluxer, has adopted a no-thoughtcrime policy towards pdf content in drawings and words. They allow it, so long as it’s not “intended” to be sexually arousing. As with the Bluesky situation, this is a moderation gray-area that is ripe for abuse, misunderstanding, and collateral damage. Furthermore, you can’t control what people get off to, and it’s disturbing that they’re even trying. It also begs the question: Why haven’t they banned zoof? Nevermind that us xeno-kinksters / monsterlovers always get caught in the crossfire when zoof gets banned. Tell me exactly how anthro a werewolf has to be before it’s not considered an animal; and if it needs to pass the Harkness Test, does that mean characters like Scooby Doo are fair game? If so, are people with less cartoony art styles going to be punished for it? What about OCs? Do we just take the original artist’s word for it? How do we know if someone is actually the original artist? Why are we splitting hairs over drawings, when irl animal abusers couldn’t care less what Fluxer’s policies are? (This line of questioning applies to cub / pdf too, especially for characters like pokemon.)
What about the children?
Fandom is not responsible for baby-proofing the internet. Yes, a child and/or teenager might lie about their age and see something they’re too young to see, but that does not justify the abolishment of dark themes in adult fiction, everywhere, forever. I promise you, the kids will be fine. If you’re that worried about it -- if you think “protecting the children” is the only thing that matters -- then the most effective approach by far would be to ban minors from the internet altogether.
Why do you ship incest?
Like I mentioned at the start of this post, I have PTSD in this category. For me, it causes violent nightmares and very intrusive memories that force me to re-live traumatic memories and the feelings associated with them over and over again. The most effective thing for me (although everyone is different) has been imaginal-exposure therapy because it creates new associations with those concepts. Fiction allows me to control exactly what happens and to desensitize my mind to those ideas. While I still find that type of content extremely upsetting when it doesn't match my preferences (including other fictional incest ships), it's still a vast improvement to the time when just encountering those concepts would trigger a week-long spiral that was far more dangerous. Think of it like a mental third-degree burn vs. eating something a little too hot.
Ask anyone who engages with taboo kinks, and I guarantee you’ll find that a significant percentage of them are like me. As survivors of abuse and trauma, we use fiction to heal from what happened to us. Among that community, I’ve known plenty of people who draw and write for that reason, but don’t post or publish their works. I personally publish my stories (the ones that involve incest) because I want to make them available for people like me who can use them to feel better. It’s very strange and disturbing that we’re being villainized for it now -- that we’re treated like abusers just for trying to cope and heal from abuse. Fiction has always been an effective method for dealing with trauma, and I’m not sure when or why people forgot that. However, for those of you who think we deserve to be shunned and ostracized for it, I will tell you that punishing victims of abuse for drawing pictures and writing words isn’t going to stop real abusers from creating more victims.
As for why I even like certain (adult / aged-up) gay sibling fictional incest ships; idk, same reason I think castration, dubcon, and forced tattooing are hot. The human mind is complicated, and fiction is the one and only place where we can explore those concepts without hurting real people in the process. Do I think it's hot when real people are involved? Hell no. Is that confusing? Not at all. This is how mature adults engage with dark themes in fiction, such as artists who portray and romanticize objectively abusive relationships that would get one or both characters arrested irl. We only get one chance to experience life, and there is no reward for smothering your fictional interests and creativity. It does not prevent bad people from doing bad things, and it does not make the world a better or safer place. It just makes you miserable.
Why should I care if gross things get censored?
Are you worried about being blocked by your favorite artist because you liked or reblogged a post from someone who drew a picture of an incest ship from a different fandom 10 years ago? Do you pre-emptively block people who like “bad” ships (even though you don’t follow their blog and they tag their posts properly) because you’re scared of being harassed or dogpiled just for interacting with them? Does it feel like you’re walking on eggshells whenever you message or reply to someone popular because you’ve seen them get pissed off and block other people for things that seemed benign (and even friendly / innocent) to you?
It didn’t used to be like this. The amount of fear, hostility, and paranoia that I've seen on-the-rise in fandom and in general is chilling and depressing. We’re in the midst of a new moral panic (which, if you’re not familiar with the term, is like the Satanic Panic and the Red Scare before it). Seeing all this happen now in my lifetime just makes me sad, especially when I think about how important fandom was to me growing up as a religiously oppressed, queer, mentally ill youth, and how the fanartists and writers I looked up to were so incredibly important to me. I can't even fathom going through that period of my life in the current fandom environment, and it hurts to think about the young queer fans who answered “yes” to any of the questions above.
That being said, I’ve found that antis fall into three categories: (1) those who like the way it feels to hurt people and enjoy having an easy target (pro/dark-shippers) they can go after with zero consequences, (2) those who feel angry and frustrated about the state of the world, and are lashing out using what little power and control they have to feel like they’re making a difference, and (3) those who go along with it because they’re scared of becoming targets themselves.
If you’re in the 3rd category and you’re either someone who makes a living off of drawing commissions or is under the age of 18, I don’t blame you; I hope things get better. If you’re neither of those, I’d encourage you to look around and ask yourself if you’re truly happy with how things are and if you want things to stay this way forever. (It doesn’t have to be like this.) Are these the type of people you really want to surround yourself with? Aren’t you tired of being afraid? I would encourage you not to waste your time on them. Once those people have removed themselves from your circles, I promise you will feel so much better, and you’ll be able to make genuine, lifelong friendships without the constant threat of being hated for stepping out of line and failing the moral purity test.
For the 2nd category, respectfully, I understand how you feel, but you’re only making things worse by misdirecting your anger and venting it on easy, vulnerable targets and spoiling one of the few sources of positive escapism we had left. There’s enough fear and hostility in the real world right now; we don’t need to bring it into fandom / fictional spaces too. Find another outlet, and stop hurting people who aren’t your enemies and only want to protect your right to draw whatever you want. Censorship of art and fiction is never a net good. The collateral damage is exponentially higher than whatever “harm” you’re preventing. (Interesting fact: Did you know that censorship of artwork is a cornerstone of facism?)
For the 1st category, disrespectfully, go fuck yourself. I will continue to assume you’re a republican and a Trump-voter until proven otherwise.
There is a frightening number of people in the world who think the very existence of queer characters or ships is just as disgusting and problematic as my fictional aged-up gay sibling incest ships. They are very good at getting marginalized communities to fight each other, and they are not going to stop with the easy targets. I have been around long enough to know firsthand that the people who want to censor drawings and words are not on your side. They will turn you against each other, and then (once you're an easier target) they will turn on you. I have watched it happen over and over again. You and the fan-created art that you make or enjoy will not be the exception just because you played along. You are useful to them at first, then you're just another target. (You always were. This is the age-old playbook of fascism and religious oppression.)
Anyone who both disagrees with me and enjoys anything other than sanitized media for toddlers is proving my point, and I mean that in the kindest, gentlest, most supportive way possible. I'm not insulting you; I'm only asking you to admit the double-standard for things you personally like vs. things you don't, and realize that the sliding scale for "things a child shouldn't see" includes everything from drawings of cartoon characters getting pregnant or punching each other to mental health awareness and self-expression. The sliding scale of what is and isn't "sexual" or "offensive" is also extremely subjective, and a drawing of two cartoon characters kissing will absolutely fall under the "sexual" umbrella if artistic censorship is allowed to run rampant.
How do I know all this? Because it's how things used to be, and I've been watching fandom spaces like Tumblr regress at an alarming rate. This is me, the ancient stone monument, telling you not to build houses below this point, because you will bitterly regret it, and I don't want that for you. I don't want anyone to live in or grow up in the type of environment (and the type of era) that I did. It is so incredibly damaging and harmful, far more than properly tagged drawings and stories. The criteria for “objectionable” artwork is a noose that tightens if we don't actively hold it open.













