In Cod We Trust(ed)

• kill me with a big rock • throw me in the ocean • fling me into the sun

Let us just appreciate that this person’s dad didn’t know when they would be home and so he couldn’t plan for them to be able to join the family for dinner, but he knew with no doubts that dear sweet Meatloaf staying in that exact position for hours was an absolute in this scenario. Truly, that cat was named well.

this woman is my fucking queen 

imagine having foreign relations like this.

Client: I don’t like those colors, and can we get different pictures?

incorrect star wars quotes (6/?) (insp.)

- never sleeps when I need to - cries at anything - fakes positivity - spends money impulsively - requires constant validation - clumsy, can’t go a day without spilling something - laughs at own unfunny jokes