Description: One shot series of BTS reminiscing on their first love. Â
Word Count: 8,277K (OMG I KNOW RIGHTT! Sorry not sorry!)
a/n: Iâm so excited for this oneshot series! Iâve been trying to find a good topic for a one shot series and suddenly when I was writing The Last One, this thought of BTSâ first love came into mind. Hope yâall like it! I actually finished it tonight, so I was so frickinâ excited to upload it!
Seokjin  Yoongi  Hoseok  Namjoon  Jimin Taehyung  Jungkook
Our first love. The most memorable love of all. Though every story is different, first loves are the hardest to forget and they donât always last forever.
âWho was my first love?â Taehyung asks. He looks up at the ceiling and cups his chin, letting out a deep breath. The corner of his lip forming into a smile. âJust like everyone elseâs, I guess. Unforgettable, cherishable. But things happen.â He whispers the last part softly, âEven now I can still remember some moments where my heart began to race.â
âTae! Tae!â I heard a voice echo loudly into my ear, waking me up from my deep slumber. I lifted my head off my desk, still half asleep.
âWhat? Whoâs bothering my beauty sleep?â I grumbled with my eyes still closed.
âB-beauty sleep? I donât see anything attractive.â A feminine voice snickered.
Shortly after I felt a hand smack the back of my head. The girly voice that had awoken me was all too familiar now, plus the hand smacking my head was just the âcherry on the top.â It belonged to only one person, the only person mean enough to hit and wake me up: Y/N, Y/L/N. Â She was our high-schoolâs scariest girl. Everyone feared her presence. I mean, she always did live up to her nickname we gave her when we were young: âPiggyâ. The dark and heavy makeup she wore did not help her either, which she claimed was a âpopular trendâ in America. I beg to differ though, she looked like a raccoon. Though she was just physically intimidating, I knew the real her: on the inside, she was the biggest dork and weirdo. That being said, she was also one of my bestest friends. We both met each other in elementary school, and from then on, it was as though fate had assigned us to be together, literally, our teacher had assigned us to be partners. We have been friends since. Although, she was mean sometimes, like really mean, I sort of missed her when she had suddenly moved away during our 5th grade. I never really got to know why, but she came back to Daegu for middle school, and had explained it all, though, I hardly even recognized her at first.
âYo!!!Check out the new girl!â Jinyoung laughed, grabbing onto my shoulder whilst shaking it crazily.
Lee Jinyoung, my other best friend along with Y/N. We both practically grew up together and went to the same schools, had the same classes, and even shared the same neighborhood. He was there for me when Y/N moved away, and ever since we both grew closer, sadly forgetting her along the way.
I turned around to see who the girl in front of the class was. She had long, pretty, black hair and her skin was milky white. While we were staring, she mustâve had a piece of her hair out of place because she tucked it behind her ear, and looked up only to find us looking at her. From here, I could see her tilting her head and squinting her eyes, she began walking towards me with an excited flare. She clapped her hands and pointed at Jinyoung and I.
âYa! Kim Taehyung?! Lee Jinyoung?!â She shifted her eyes at the both of us, waiting for a response. We both looked at each other and shrugged our shoulders, not knowing who she was. She rolled her eyes and let out a âtskâ sound, âIâm right, right? You both havenât changed at all! Itâs me! Y/L/N, Y/N! You really donât remember me?! We were best friends.â She frowned and crossed her arms.
Jinyoung and I once again looking at each other, only this time it was due to appallment and a little bit of fear. We both turned to look at Y/N, finally recognizing her through her never-changing smug look on her face, expecting us to cheer or celebrate. But we both just continued to stare at her, half shocked to see her and the other half feeling gross that we had just checked out our old friend.
âAh~ Y/N? H-how are you?â I finally let out, after what felt like an hour of silence, though it was just a couple of seconds. Â
âGood! Iâm great! Especially since I have a class with you punks again!â She punched Jinyoung on the shoulder out of excitement.
Jinyoung forced a smile and took a deep breath, âNice to see you too, Y/N.â
âWhy do you sound disappointed to see me again, Jinyoung? Donât you both miss me or ever wondered where I went?â She pouted, her gaze shifted to a more sorrowful look, compared to her usual big and bubbly eyes.
âOf course we miss you! Where have you been?!â I quickly replied, slapping Jinyoung on the shoulder. Her smile appearing on her face again. She placed her hands on her hip and stuck her nose up in the air.
âI went to study overseas for a while. Pretty cool, huh? My dad got a job in the states and let me stay with him, until I wanted to come back to Korea. And now Iâm back!â She grinned.
I had to admit, I was jealous of her. Of course, she went to the states. Her parents were doctors and owned small clinics around Korea.
âWell, Iâll go there one day when I become a singer! Iâll travel the whole world when I become an idol!â I quickly let out, not realizing I sounded a little petty. I didnât know where that came from. But I knew my dream of becoming a singer was just that, a dream.
âThen you better bring me along.â Jinyoung laughed.
âMe too! Iâve only just visited LA, I want to see the world too with my friends.â Y/N huffed.
âI promise then! When I become a idol, Iâll take us all over the world!â
With that we pinky swore with one another, giggling and talking about the places weâd visit. Even though we all knew it was a far far dream, we still laughed and spoke about it the whole day. Thinking about it, made me miss my friends. I still think about this day often. The promise we made. Who wouldâve thought I wouldâve really become a singer. Â
After hitting my head, I opened my eyes and wasnât surprised to see Y/Nâs face in front of mine. She had her usual smug-look on her face, with her arms crossed.
âAnd why did you wake me up?â I groaned, patting my head.
âHmm. Maybe because our homeroom teacher, Miss. Jung is coming right now? You should be thanking me.â She grinned, taking a seat in the chair in front of me.
âOh my god, thank you so much your highness.â I sarcastically said before giving out a huge laugh. Though it was funny to me, she wasnât amused, as her big hand found its way to the back of my head again. The pain spreading once again throughout my body. I frowned at her and rubbed the area where I had just been hit, letting out a deep sigh. She flashed her fake smile and gave me wink. To which I pretended to vomit, holding onto my stomach.
âDonât act like this face isnât cute.â She placed both her hands on her cheek and attempted to act cute. âTaehyung-ie. Am I cute yet?â
I let out a laugh. What a dork. Though, I couldnât help but notice her makeup was actually decent today, she still had her heavy eyeliner, but she looked human. She had changed since middle school, appearance wise. Like I said, she was very pretty in middle school, all the guys fell for her and always showered her with gifts and flowers. But apparently she didnât like that attention, so when we came to high-school she had changed up her soft, innocent âgirl-next-doorâ look for a more edgier-scarier-look. Just like middle school all over again, we werenât able to recognize her the first day of high-school.
Jinyoung and I sat with backs turned away from the classroom door, talking about all the older girls in highschool. We both felt a sense of manliness, being freshmens and all, and hitting puberty. We didnât want to brag or anything, but we grew unexpectedly tall as well, and handsome since middle school.
âDid Y/N tell you when sheâs going to come? I havenât seen her all summer.â Jinyoung said.
âNope! She hasnât spoken to me either. All I know is she told me she is a âchangedâ woman.â I snorted.
With that we both began to laugh together, not even hearing the feminine and familiar voice behind us.
âYa! I said, what are you guys laughing at?â
Jinyoung and I turned around, and when I say I was shocked, I mean I literally fell out of my chair and crawled to the corner, shock. She looked like the mix of the grudge and a racoon, I had even thought of a new nickname for her: Grudge-coon. It took a second for me to realize it was Y/N, and before I could even say anything Jinyoung had said it for me.
âThis is what you called âchangedâ?! More like monstrous change!â
She glared at Jinyoung, making her look even more scarier. Her eyes were hidden behind the dark eyeliner. I even whimpered while staring into her black pupils, quickly turning away from her right after. Though, she turned to face me and tilted her head, waiting for me to comment. Â
âWhat do you think, Taehyung?â
âI-I um. I-I think you lookââ I looked up and saw Y/Nâs face. Although the heavy eyeliner hid her eyes, I could still see the little, innocent, girl inside it. I didnât want to crush her feelings, I mean she mustâve felt confident walking out of her house like that, right? âGood. You look great.â
âThen why did you jump out of your chair?â She pouted and crossed her arms.
I laughed and smiled, âThe only reason I jumped out of my seat was because I was so happy to see you.â I stood up and wrapped one of my arms around her shoulder, âI missed you alot, punk!â
Her eyes disappeared as her lips curved into a smile. The same smile that would eventually stir my heart and question my feelings for her.
History lecture had finally ended. One of the most boring subjects in the whole wide world. I always had a tendency to fall asleep, especially since it was right after lunch. I stretched out my arms and felt eyes on me. I turned to where I felt the heavy tension, and of course, it was Y/N with her big, brown eyes gazing at me.
âAre you going to eat spicy rice cakes today after school?â She asked me.
I frowned and shook my head no.
âWhy? Jinyoung is even going! Comâon we have to go!â
âGo on without me, I have to help my grandmother with her farm today, itâs strawberry season.â
I was lyingâwell half lying. I really did want to help my grandma with her strawberries. But the truth was, my mom hadnât given me any allowance because she was tight on money this month. My family wasnât the richest, and we sometimes even wondered if we would have food on the table. But Iâm not ashamed of my family though, Iâm always grateful for them.
âOkay then.â She said sounding really disappointed.
I mocked her pouting mouth, earning a soft smile from her. She probably knew I was lying, I mean after all these years together, despite moving, she still knew me best, better than Jinyoung sometimes. Â
After school ended, I quickly grabbed my things and forced my way through the huge crowd of students. I tried to be as fast as I could because I wanted to avoid Y/N and Jinyoung. I knew they would force me to go with them, but I hated being a burden, especially with money. I heard a voice call out to me halfway through the hall.
âTae! Taehyung! Kim Taehyung!â
Y/N, god, could she leave me alone? It most definitely was her, since all the students around me moved towards the walls, afraid of her. I let out a deep breath and tried to walk a little faster, pretending not to hear her, crossing my fingers and praying she would just give up. But suddenly I felt her grip on my shoulder as she turned me around and forced a smile.
âOh Y/N, you were calling for me?â I chuckled nervously.
âYeah! I knew you could hear me, jerk. Anyways, letâs go.â She giggled.
I gave a confused look at her and knitted my eyebrows together. She just rolled her eyes and grabbed my hand, entwining her fingers between mine, making her way to the front of the school.
âWait-where you taking me? I donât want to eat.â I told her.
She stopped her tracks and let my hand go. She crossed her arms and closed her eyes, before speaking.
âTo your grandmaâs farm. Letâs go! I havenât seen her in the longest, so I want to go. Plus, we can always get spicy rice cakes another time.â
With that she grabbed my hand again and dragged me out of the school yard. With her back facing towards me, I stared at her bobbing head and vaguely remembered feeling my heart race, not because we were practically jogging, but looking at her made my heart beat. This was the first time I felt this way.
My grandparentâs farm wasnât too far from about 3 miles away from school. Luckily, it was a nice walk especially since it was spring. The cherry blossom trees surrounded the path to my grandmaâs. The air was filled with the fresh smell of flowers and pollen. I looked at Y/N, whose hand was still entwined with mine. I never noticed how short she was to me, compared to last spring where we both stood at the same height. She used to tease me and say I would remain five feet one forever, but now Iâm five feet ten. I had to admit though, it was cute that she was short.
The breeze began blowing the cherry blossom flowers towards us, a petal landing on the right side of her hair. I used my free hand and began to reach for it. She noticed my hand and looked at me, I guess she was startled or taken aback. Both of us just gazing into each one anotherâs eyes for awhile. It was like those cliche movie scenes, where time had froze, and we both just took in each otherâs presence. I finally regained my senses and quickly grabbed the petal off, I showed it to her and smiled.
âThis was on your hair.â
âO-oh. Okay. Um-thanks.â She beamed, tucking a piece of her hair behind her ear.
We stopped at one of the stores along the way, and she had bought the both of us ice cream. I told her I didnât want it, but she had already opened it and shoved it into my mouth. Once we arrived, my grandmother greeted the both of us with her smile.
âHello Taehyung! I see youâve brought over Y/N. Hello Miss. Y/N. Glad to see you are still friends with our Taehyung.â She smiled.
Y/N went over to my grandma and hugged her. She was familiar with my family because they used to come over to buy our vegetables and fruits. Plus, Y/N and Jinyoung came over often when we were kids and played around the farm. Everyone in my family knew them both very well.
âHi grandmother! Iâve missed you!â Y/Nâs eyes gleaming with joy, as she went over to embrace her. I walked over to Y/N and pulled her away from grandma.
âYa! Donât hurt my precious Grandma with your big hands!â I scolded Y/N, while rubbing my grandmotherâs shoulder, âShe didnât hurt you right?â
âBig hands?! I donât have big hands! You do!â She exclaimed, while pointing at my digits.
I mocked her voice and she glared at me. I stuck out my tongue and gave my grandmother a hug from the back.
âGrandma, I missed you.â I cried.
âI just saw you yesterday, Taehyung.â She patted my back and smiled.
âStill, I miss you.â I smirked while looking at Y/N whose face was full of annoyance. I didnât mind her hugging Grandma at all, I just wanted to mess with her. Seeing her getting worked up was cute.
We went over to the strawberry field and began to pick out all the ripe strawberries. The sun was covered by the clouds, making it a really good day to harvest, since it wasnât too hot or too cold. I looked over my shoulder to see Y/N concentrated on picking. Beads of sweat coming down from her forehead, she always sweated so easily no matter what weather, thus earning her nickname.
âWipe your sweat, Piggy.â I laughed.
She looked up at me and frowned, wiping away her sweat with the back of her hand. My grandma came to my side and smiled at the sight of us bickering.
âTaehyung-ie. Have you ever thought of Y/N as a woman?â She asked innocently, eyes glistening with hope. A wave of shock and horror crawled up my spine, my eyes immediately widening at the preposterous statement. I began laughing out loudly, slapping my hand on my knees.
âGrandma, I barely even see her as a human being.â
âSheâs a pretty girl. I know a good girl when I see one. You donât want to miss your chance with her.â
âYeah, sheâs a good girl, but I donât think anything will happen between us. Sheâs my bestfriend.â
âNever say never. I think you two are compatible with one another.â Grandma smiled, getting up to go to the other side to help Y/N.
I turned around and looked at Y/N. I couldnât help but think about Grandmaâs words. To be honest, I forgot Y/N was even a girl sometimes. I just grew too used to seeing her as my best-friend, Itâd be weird to suddenly date. Plus, she wouldnât even date me. I guess I was staring at Y/N for too long she had noticed me and laughed. That damn smile, I swear. Thatâs where all my trouble would soon begin, with her smile.
A few weeks after that day, I slowly felt myself getting nervous around her for no apparent reason. Every time she smiled I would feel my heart race, it was strange. I was even caught looking at her multiple times by Jinyoung.
âWhy have you been staring at Y/N with googly eyes?â He furrowed his eyebrows.
âI-I donât know what youâre talking about. I laughed nervously, âI havenât been staring at Piggy. Youâre kidding me right?â
âYa. You canât lie to me. Look,â he grabbed my hand away from my mouth, âYouâve even begun biting your nails, you only do that when youâre lying.â
âItâs nothing, Jinyoung. Really. I canât stare at people? You act like youâve never stared at a pretty girlââ
âWhat?! You think she is pretty?!â He had his mouth and eyes wide open. Mentally cursing my big mouth. I smacked my head with my hand and let out a deep breath.
âI-I didnât mean it like that.â I groaned, running my fingers thro my hair.
âUh-yes you did, Tae. You-you like Y/N?â He whispered, while pointing at Y/Nâs direction who had been moved to the front after talking too much.
âI didnât say that, dumbass. I just-maybe might have a teensy-itty-bitty crush. Like only like 10%.â
Jinyoungâs mouth was still wide open that flies could have mistaken it for their home. I rolled my eyes and pushed him on the shoulder. He didnât say anything for awhile, mouth still shaped like an âo.â He finally spoke up, closing his eyes.
âWhy though, Tae? Why Piggy? Our best friend since elementary? The girl who wears too much makeup? The girl who pushes us both around? Are we talking about the same girl here?â
I shrugged my shoulders and looked at her. She was asleep. She always scolded me for sleeping, yet there she was in the front, resting her head against her desk. I smiled and rested my chin on my hand.
âI donât know too. Maybe itâs because I could be myself around her, and wonât get judged.â
Our sophomore year of high-school had ended about a month ago. Jinyoung left to Seoul to visit his momâs side of the family, leaving Y/N and I alone. We were both bored and had decided to play around my grandparentâs farm, like old times. Though it didnât last too long, since we both sat under the big oak tree due to the humidness and heat. Out of breath, she turned to look at me.
âTaehyung.â She said softly, wiping my sweat away with the back of her hand, âDo you plan to stay in Daegu forever?â
I turned to look at her and nodded, âMaybe, I donât know what I want to do. I just want to stay with my grandparents and help them with the farm.â
âBut donât you want to do something bigger? Iâve heard you sing before, why donât you try to become an idol? Thatâs getting popular these days.â
I rubbed the top of her head and chuckled. I havenât thought about becoming an idol since middle school, plus my parents would never let me. They wanted me to become something big like a doctor or lawyer.
âIâm serious Taehyung! You should think about it, do something that makes you happy.â
Her eyes glistened with joy. She was so enthusiastic about my future, even though she herself didnât know what she wanted to do.
âWhat makes you happy, Taehyung?â Â
âYou make me happy.â That was what I wanted to tell her, but I didnât because Iâm a coward. I just smiled and replied with a simple, âSinging does. It really does.â
âThen letâs go to Busan! They always have random auditions!â Y/N smiled brightly, while jumping up and down.
âAre you crazy? My mom would never let me go visit Busan, and Iâm broke!â
âDonât worry about money, I got that covered! Just worry about your mom letting you go,â She grabbed and held onto both my hands, âLetâs go today!â
âToday? You really must be crazy, Y/N. Are you sick?â I placed the back of my hand against her forehead and checked her temperature. She laughed and moved my hand, âIâm serious, Taehyung. Weâre not doing anything, and weâll be back before the sun is down. Itâs barely 11 in the morning, if we take the train itâll only be one hour and weâll have plenty of time to be back home.â
Later that day, I told my mom about taking a trip to Busan with Y/N, and she scolded me for asking such a thing. I had already knew this would happen, so I lied and told her to at least let me hang out at Jinyoungâs place. She hesitated, but allowed me to because she knew I would just spend the rest of my remaining summer helping my grandparents with their farm. I was so happy, I began jumping around the house because little did she know I was going to go to Busan. I called Y/N and told her that the plan was in motion, and I would explain more in person.
We met up at the train station. I had quickly put on a decent shirt and thrown on a red flannel. I grabbed some coins that I hoped could at least provide us with snacks and drinks. Y/N had a baseball cap to cover her hair and actually was bare faced, the heavy makeup wiped away. I blinked at her a couple times, taking in her natural face. Her eyes were much smaller without the heavy eyeshadow and eyeliner, but it was cute. She looked like a human being.
âReady to go?â She raising her arm to show the two tickets in between her fingers. I nodded my head and followed her to the platform to get on. We both sat near the exit, so we could be closer to the door. I knew she enjoyed looking out at the landscape, so I always made sure she sat near the window wherever we went.
The ride there was relatively quiet, of course, I already knew it was going to be. During trips, Y/N focused on the scenery outside. She watches in amazement and excitement, aweing and opening her mouth every time we passed by something beautiful. I started noticing this since we were young, she was easily amused. It was a good thing too, since it was easier to make her laugh.
âTaehyung look!â She exclaimed, patting my shoulder and pointing at the Diamond Bridge. It was a massive, white, strip of metal lying above the crystal, sparkling, body of water. If it already looked this pretty in the afternoon, Iâd love to see it at night.
âOne day when we have time we should come back and look at it at night, I bet itâd be so pretty.â
She turned to look at me with her twinkling eyes and the corner of her lips curving. I was mesmerized. It seemed like my eyes were playing with me because I swear I saw stars shine around her figure. It seemed as though I was in slow motion; I wouldnât mind staring at Y/N forever in this moment though. I didnât know which view I liked better, the bridge or Y/Nâs beautiful smile. I hadnât realized I was staring for so long until the sound of her voice echoed through my ears
ââokay, Taehyung?â Y/N tilted her head.
I blinked a few times before answering to her, âSorry, what did you say?â I asked, chuckling nervously.
âI said, letâs come here next summer together at night, okay?â She repeated. I nodded and held out my pinky, âOkay, I promise you. Weâll come here next year at night.â I smiled and locked our two pinkies together.
Once we got off the train we headed to any nearby restaurant since we both havenât eaten since breakfast and it was now 1 in the afternoon. We werenât too familiar with the streets of Busan. It was always our parents who handled traveling. Now it was just me and Y/N. Outside the train station, there were some convenient store located along the side. We decided to just grab some kimbap from the gas station so we wouldnât have to waste too much time and money.
âAre you sure youâre going to be full off that?â I asked her, while watching her struggle to unwrap the heavily saran wrapped package. I helped tugged on the material and it popped open. Y/N took a bite from the kimbap, then grabbed another. She finally nodded in response, cheeks full of food. It was a cute look. Unconsciously, I wiped away a grain of rice from her cheek, causing her to look up in embarrassment.
âYa, Iâm trying to eat.â She proceeded to slap me then, so I took the current kimbap from her hands. Holding cheap kimbap, we followed wherever the road took us, hoping that road led to the beach. On the way there, there were flyers for what seemed like an arts school. Y/N held my arm back so she could read for more info. I was more interested in finally dipping my feet in the cool waters.
âTaehyung, look. Singing! You should do it! Itâs the annual audition rounds! I had a friend make it last year. I donât know where theyâre at though.â
I stared absentmindedly at her, waiting for her to laugh. Seconds passed and nothing happened, she still pointed at the poster with a bright look. I guess she really wasnât kidding.
âNo way. I donât sing, you of all people know that.â I laughed it off instead, and continued to the original path we were taking. She ran up to me and hit the back of my head with the now empty container. I scratched my head and glared at her.
âIâve heard you sing before. It was while we were picking strawberries. It was an American artist, huh? I forgot his name, but I remember your voice, Taehyung.â
âWell thenâŠyou only heard it because you were being a stalker.â
âNo one would want to stalk you first off Tae, and second, I was at your grandmaâs farm before you, lazy. You woke up late, idiot.â
I tapped my index finger on my chin, trying to remember that day, but had no recollection. âOh whatever! Youâre not going to hear me sing.â I crossed my arms. I guess she didnât like that answer, since she jumped on my back and began to rub her knuckle against my scalp. I felt the eyes of the bystanders begin to stare at the both of usâwell her.
âYa! Get off. People are starting to stare at us.â I tried to shake her off, but she stayed in her place, refusing to move, âNot until you sing.â
I knew she would say that. I smiled at the people staring at us and apologized, swirling my fingers near my temple mouthing, âsheâs crazy.â After a few more minutes, I finally gave in, only because I was beginning to feel embarrassed and annoyed at the strangerâs glares, âFine! Iâll sing, now will you get off.â I felt the weight of her body from my back disappear. Now standing in front of me, she grabbed my hand and jumped up and down excitedly, âYay! Iâm so happy!â
âAre you really that happy to just hear me sing?â I smiled.
She quickly nodded and grinned, still holding onto my hand. She raised her eyebrow and flutter her eyes in patience. I took a deep breath and cleared my throat. I was so shy to sing I could feel my heart racing and my palms sweating, her hand clasped with mine did not help the nervousness. I finally let out a little sound, almost like a hum, to which she scolded me.
âI canât hear you.â
âOkay. Okay. Just give me a moment.â I inhaled and closed my eyes. I began to sing the words from my favorite song, Lee Juckâs âRain.â Even after I was done singing, I kept my eyes closed for the fear of Y/N not liking my voice, though I knew I did sound pretty good. I slowly opened my eyes and saw her face. She had let both my hands go and placed them on her cheeks. I could see the admiration in her eyes, she hadnât said a word yet. She just continued to look into my eyes.
âWas I that good?â I jokingly laughed.
âY-yes! You were amazing! You have to become a singer. You have to! Taehyung! You wereâoh my goshâamazing.â
I rubbed the nape of my neck and smiled. Hearing her compliment me was like music to my ears, would it be greedy if I wanted to hear more? Watching her jump and skip, praising me for my soulful voice, was something I could never forget. The way her face lit up again and again, the way she tried to copy my deep voice, her laughs, her voice, her pink cheeks, everything about her was so beautiful.
School finally started again, my summer vacation coming to an end. Y/N and my trip to Busan ended with us just going to the beach and throwing water at each other. After that day, I spent the rest of my remaining days helping at my grandparentâs farm. Y/N also spent the rest of hers at the states. I was all alone for awhile, but Jinyoung came back to Daegu and asked me if I confessed, and to that I couldnât answer.
âI canât believe you didnât confess, dude. You had all that time and even went on a trip with her.â
âI know, I know. It didnât cross my mind,â I groaned, placing my hand on my forehead. Jinyoung placed his hand on my back and patted it, âSo when is it the perfect time then? You just got to do it.â
âIâll do it soon. Iâll do it, I promise. Just wait.â I sighed.
The first day of high school again. Though his time, I felt like I was on the top of the world, especially since we were no longer freshmens, Jinyoung and I didnât have the same class his year, but luckily we were well known and popular with our classmates, so it wasnât a big of problem to us. Though, Y/N would have trouble if she didnât have a class with either one of us since everyone was scared of her.
I sat in my classroom, surrounded with some of my acquaintances. We were engrossed in our conversation about the newest video games and amines, until I heard a voice call out my name.
Everyone turned around to look at the owner of the feminine voice calling out to me. Even though I already recognized her. I looked at the direction of the voice and of course it was her. Y/N. I was shocked to see her. She had cut her long hair, to a shoulder length. The black color now replaced with blonde. Her heavy makeup, reduced to a more natural soft look. I would be lying to myself if I said I didnât think she was beautiful. But sadly, I wasnât the only one who noticed her now.
âY-Y/N?!â The guys around me exclaimed.
âWhy are you guys looking at me like that?â She asked with a confused face. Obviously they were looking at her, at this point who wasnât staring at her.
âY-you look different.â I smiled, standing up from my seat. She tilted her head and frowned, âIs that a bad thing?â I quickly waved my hands in disagreement, shaking my head no,
âNo! You just look really good. You look nice.â I laughed nervously, while scratching my head. I watched her cheeks turn to a subtle pink color, to which she covered with her hands. She looked down and nodded.
âWell, I just came to say hi to you. I have the same class as Jinyoung, so I justâyeah. Iâm just going to go. It was nice seeing you. Lunch?â She smiled cutely.
I nodded in agreement and watched her leave. As soon as she left, all the guys made âouuâ sounds, while looking at me.
âSo since when did you and Y/N start dating?â One of the guys asked while nudging my shoulder with his elbow.
âW-weâre not dating.â I answered back softly.
âSo is it okay if I get at her then?
I glared at him and shook my head no, âSheâs mine.â
Our lunch never happened that day. Apparently, some of her classmates wanted to eat with her instead. But even after, I rarely got to see her. Everyone stopped being scared of her, and it was like middle school all over again. Her heavy makeup gone, her tough-girl persona gone. She was the innocent, âgirl-next-doorâ again. She was gifted and showered with presents and flowers from her guy admirers. Girls even flung themselves and clung onto her, claiming Y/N as their new best-friend. Jinyoung and I didnât get to hang out with her as much anymore, besides the fact that Jinyoung had the same class as her. But even so, he says that she was always occupied with her new friends.
It was around October when we finally got to speak to her again, and it had already been two months since school started. It was really weird, it felt like I was talking to a stranger. My feelings for her were still there of course, but I wasnât sure if she was the same person I fell for.
âTaehyung! Jinyoung!â She waved at us. Walking towards us, she sat down at the empty spot next to Jinyoung, âwhy are you guys eating outside?â
I shrugged my shoulders and continued eating the meal my mom cooked for me. Jinyoung and I both didnât say anything to her. She leaned in to look at me, her eyes brows creasing.
âAre you guys mad at me?â She asked, sounding sympathetic. I pressed my lips together and avoided her gaze.
âNo. We just donât know what to say.â I finally answered her. She nudged my shoulder and chuckled, âIs it because I havenât been hanging out with you guys?â
Jinyoung turned to look at her and squinted his eyes, âNo itâs definitely not because of that.â I couldnât help but laugh at his obvious sarcasm and pettiness. Y/N didnât like it though, she stood up and placed her hands on her hips.
âWell Iâm sorry that people want to hang out with me! Maybe you guys should get some new friends tooââ
âWe do have other friends too, but we know who our real ones are and actually make time for them!â I interrupted her, I didnât mean to sound so angry but it was the truth. I could feel my blood boiling and my face heating up. But for some reason, looking at Y/Nâs face made me immediately regret it. I could never forget her face; eyes swelling up with tears, cheeks flushed, and her lips quivering. I couldnât bear to see her, so I got up and walked away from her. Not turning back, not stopping. My heart began to race, but it wasnât because of her, but out of anger.
Winter came by faster that I expected it to. The snow covered the town like a white blanket. I enjoyed the snow, and so did Y/N. Though, it had been months since Iâve last spoken to Y/N, since Iâve last seen her actually. After that day I Iâve been avoiding her. I kept myself busy by staying at my grandparents farm and going down to the PC rooms. Jinyoung had told me that sheâs been wanting to talk to me, but I didnât want to. Iâve been trying to sort my feelings out and try to convince myself that I donâtâdidnât like her. It was just me getting my feelings confused because weâve been friends for so long. Thatâs all.
As I was sitting in class one day, staring outside the window. I heard the classroom door being slammed opened. I turned my head to the direction of the sound and saw Y/N standing in front of it. She was stomping towards me with her eyebrows furrowed, stopping in front of my desk.
âGet up.â She demanded. I didnât move or budge. I shifted my eyes back to the view outside. It was snowing today, apparently it was supposed to be one of the coldest day this winter. My thoughts were interrupted, as she slammed her fist onto my desk, âGet. Up. Kim. Taehyung.â
âWhat do you want?â I sighed, still not looking at her. She let out a deep breath and grabbed my wrist, dragging me out of my classroom and to the snowy soccer field. We stopped at the bench and she practically threw me onto the seat. With her back facing towards me, she began to scream.
âWhy are acting this way, Taehyung?!â
I didnât answer her. She turned around to face me, cheeks and nose red from the cold air. I could see her breath coming out of her pink, soft lips. Her brown eyes beginning to sparkle as tears formed and slowly falling down her cheek. I stood up and wiped away her tear, cupping her face. Why did she have to look so beautiful crying?
I lifted up her face, both hands still on her cheeks, and at that moment I donât know what washed over me. Maybe it was the cold, maybe it was because I was a little sick, but I found myself leaning into her face. I suddenly closed my eyes and met my lips with hers. I could feel her trembling hands against my chest, not knowing how to react. But all I knew was that I wanted this moment to last forever. I slowly pulled away and watched her cheeks redden with shyness.
âI like you, Y/N. Iâve liked you for so long itâs driving me insane.â I whispered, âMaybe thatâs why Iâm acting this way.â
She didnât answer me, I didnât expect to her. I wouldnât know how to react either if I was in her shoes. She just stared at me, blankly. Quickly placing her hands on her lips and looked down. I could see her chest rising and falling, still not saying anything until finally she lifted her head up and looked at me.
âI-itâs okay, Y/N. Iâm not expecting you to say anything, I-I know itâs a lot to take in. I know.â I muttered cutting the silence.
âTaehyung. I-I really donât know what to say.â
âItâs okay. You donât have to, I just wanted to tell you before it was too late.â
âI-Iâm moving, Taehyung. Iâm moving back to the states.â She stuttered.
My eyes widened and it was as though my heart had dropped and shattered. After all these months of ignoring and avoiding her, she was going to move. I felt so stupid and pathetic, âW-why?â
âMy dad wants my family to be together again, back in the states. Iâm so sorry Taehyung.â
âWhen?â I felt a lump in my throat. I couldnât look at her, if I did I wouldâve just cried.
âNext week. After your birthday. I wanted to tell you, but youâve been ignoring me. Iâm sorry, Taehyung.â
I backed away slowly, âWhy are you apologizing? This is my fault. I-I was too busy being petty that I didnât even know my best friend was leaving.â
She touched my arm and gave a soft smile, while shaking her head no, âItâs my fault. That day⊠you were right. I got too caught up with feeling popular and wanted that I forgot about my real friends. You.â
I began to laugh, and she quickly caught on and joined me, âHow silly weâve been acting? Weâre acting like children. It reminds me of those times when we were kids fighting over the littlest things.â I chuckled.
âTime really does fly by fast.â She replied sounding nostalgic, âAnd here I am leaving again.â
I looked at her and she had a small smile. I couldnât read her expression, like I usually could. It wasnât until now I realized she had already said goodbye to me.
Hours turned to days, and days turned to the week of Y/Nâs departure. I woke up feeling lethargic, unsure if it was my body, or if it was because my heart. Forcing myself to get up, I got ready to face the bittersweet goodbye to come. I opened my drawer where I had kept my last gift to Y/N. A locket with a picture of the three us: Jinyoung, Y/N, and me. I stared at the picture, one last time before shoving into my pocket. It was a photo of us starting high-school together when all still had the same class and time for each other. Those were the good times.
I made my way to the airport with a heavy heart. I felt like I had rocks in my shoes, I couldnât bring myself to enter the doors. Just staring at the windows and looking at my reflection. My heart racing, and my fingers trembling. I was really going to lose her again. Closing my eyes, I quickly shook the thoughts out and walked into the airport. There she was standing in front of the escalators with her luggages; her mom and her little brother beside her. She didnât notice me until I tapped her shoulder, turning around and flashing a forced smile.
âTaehyung. You made it.â
I nodded and looked around for Jinyoung, âIs Jinyoung going to be here?â She quickly shook her head no.
âI told everyone I left yesterday, so you and I could have this time to ourselves.â
It hit me then that she really was leaving. Sure I had Jinyoung and my other classmates, but no one compared to Y/N. She was special, she was my best friend; she knew it all. I couldnât do it, I couldnât say goodbye. Closing my eyes so that she couldnât see the obvious tears threatening to fall, though it wasnât much help as they trickled down my cheek. I felt her soft hands touch my cheek, wiping away the fallen droplets.
âDonât cry, youâll make me cry.â She whimpered, I grabbed her wrist and pulled her into my arms, burying my face in the nape of her neck. She smelt like her usual scent; strawberries and honey. She patted my back and whispered something I couldnât hear over my sobbing. I pulled away from her, still holding onto her back, and sniffled, âWhat did you say? Sorry, I couldnât hear you.â
She laughed and softly hit my shoulder, âYou could never hear me. I said, donât be a baby.â Â I let a soft chuckle escape from my lips. We let the moment sink in, neither of us saying a word. I looked into her big brown eyes, the same ones Iâve looked at multiple times, but somehow they looked different today. I didnât want this moment to end, but her mom tapped her shoulder and pointed at the clock, motioning that it was time for them to go.
âI guess this is goodbye.â Y/N whispered as she slowly let go of my embrace. She didnât look up to meet my eyes, I figured if she did she would cry. She never wanted to look weak in front of me. Typical Y/N.
âIâll miss you, Y/N. I always will never forget, never.â I murmured. I watched her and her family make their way up the escalators, slowly disappearing from my sight. I turned around, getting to leave as well, but I remembered. The locket. The damn locket. I pivoted and spun around, running up the steps, bumping into strangers, no sight of Y/N anywhere. I was worried, I probably looked like a crazy man, but at this point it didnât matter to me, I just needed to give her my gift. Damn, how could they have walked so fast? I turned the corner and saw a glimpse of Y/N waiting in the check-in. Whether it was Y/N or not, I ran towards her. Obviously I couldnât pass through the heavily secured line, so I settled to yell out her name.
âY/N! Y/N!â I shouted out, earning stares from strangers around me. I waved my hands and moved my head to see if she would turn around, but no response. Fuck. Did she already go? I tried once more, but no response again. Out of breath and I repeated, until I felt a finger tap my shoulder.
âTaehyung? What are you doing?â
I turned around and saw Y/N standing in front of me.
âY/N! You didnât leave yet! I was looking for you everywhere! I couldnât find you, I was so worried. I thought I lost myânevermind, I found you. Thank god, I found you.â I panted.
She smiled at me and raised one of her eyebrows, âDid you forget something?â
I took the locket out of my pocket and showed it to her, âA gift, from me. Thereâs a picture of Jinyoung, you, and me. So youâll never forget us.â
I watched her eyes swell with tears, letting the wall she had built, fall. She began to sob as she opened the locket, seeing our faces. I didnât expect something so small to make her cry this big. She placed it around her neck and wiped her tears.
âI could never forget you idiots. You guys are my best friends, always.â
I hugged her one last final time, letting her wetness soak into my shirt. Patting her back and stroking her hair, it was really goodbye. I let her go and watched her slowly drift into the crowd, until suddenly she stopped in the middle, people around her avoiding her. It was as though everything around me had slowed town as she turned around.
âIâm sorry I canât keep that promise next summer. Go visit the Diamond Bridge in Busan for the both of us.â She smiled, that same smile that made me fall for her. The same smile that questioned my feelings for her. The same smile that started everything.Â
ââAnd that was the end of my first love. I never saw her again, until recently she had invited me to her wedding. Though I couldnât make it due my schedule. But to her I sent my regards and my heart.â Taehyung sighed, putting his head down. He looked up again and began smiling, âDid I ever go back to the bridge you ask? Yeah, thatâs where Jimin and I first met, actually, after I got accepted in BigHit. Thinking back on it, who was your first love, Jimin?â
Jimin had a soft smile, making his eyes crinkle. âItâs a long story. Butââ
a/n: This piece took me and my betaâs days and nights. I swear, I really really hope you guys enjoyed this. Itâs wayyyy longer than I expected, but it was really fun and cute to write. Thank you for reading up to this long! Much love! Until next time, xoxo.Â
Playlist: Smyangâs BTS Piano Covers (All of dem I SWEARR), Kensuke Ushio - Koe No Katachi âA Silent Voiceâ, Friend A will be my accompanist (ćäșșAćăç§ăźäŒŽć„è
ă«ä»»ćœăăŸă) - Your Lie In April OST, Theme of Mitsuha, Spirited Away - Spirited Away, V&RM - 4 OâClock