Come Talk To Me I'm Always Bored @monty-glasses-roxy - Tumblr Blog

I've been wandering Fiona's tags and I've just discovered that she's been shipped with William's unnamed wife and possibly also Henry's before and in the context of what I've already been wanting to do for a Fiona Lives AU, this is so fucking funny. I've been rambling about this elsewhere for about two hours now and might post some of it tomorrow but until then oh my god Mrs Afton is NOT having fun at the lesbian bar any more lmao

#this is a 'and what were YOU doing at the devils sacrament?' kind of situation for her and she's going to go insane over this forever now #moving on from her fucking murderer husband and landing himself straight into this Situation with absolutely no idea if this is real anymor #is this real life or did she walk into an alternate dimension that exists purely to spite her specifically because she can't fucking tell #and this is BEFORE you add Henry's wife into the mix this is literally just her reaction to what I've already decided on for Fiona Lives AU #Henry's wife walking in during this feels like overkill to her at this point. she's got no idea what's happening any more.#seriously I had no idea anyone had even considered shipping Fiona with anyone and to find this out in the middle of my Fiona Lives AU thing #incredible. absolutely hilarious timing. if you're reading this please feel sorry for Mrs Afton she's STRUGGLING right now.#but it's very funny so it's okay actually and she wins in the end because it also feels like an extra Fuck You to William specifically lmao #fiona lives au

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zooophagous

I have been a sheep caretaker for like two days and already I'm like. Wow. I get it.

I get why these were some of the earliest mammals to ever be domesticated. They look up to humans with this sort of dumb but all at once innocent and pure and trusting expression. They're happy to see you. They follow you around. They like to be rubbed under their chins. Maybe its just some latent Scottish highland shepherd DNA I still have in me but I look at my sheep charges and suddenly I see why the love of God for humanity is so often described as a shepherd and his sheep. I'd fight a wolf for these guys. I'd go way the Hell out of my way for them. I'd carry their young for miles on my own back.

upward-bound

nearly 80k reblogs and how many of you eat lamb

zooophagous

The ancient shepherds I'm referencing also ate lamb lol

#roxy

Oh shit FNaF World 2 and Security Breach 2??? We have actual news and not just another spot the difference for the theorists to go insane over?? Holy shit??

#wat??? I thought it would be sister location 2 but I guess not??? crazy???#I've never played fnaf world or seen anyone play it so uh. maybe I should look at it at some point I guess

daisywords

the plot chickens (becomes scared of its own premise)

restless-50

@monty-glasses-roxy

#THE PLOT CHICKENS!!!

dozydawn

caitlikescoffee

the-acid-pear

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monty-glasses-roxy

So Fiona Lives AU has the perfect set up for Roxy to get a pet of some kind and I've been really unsure on what she would decide on, what would work best for her and what Fiona would tolerate in the house but for some reason, for the last day and a half, I've slowly been getting attached to the idea that Roxy ends up with a pet sheep.

Just... accidentally adopts a little pet lamb from a nearby farm. It hangs out with her around MCM sometimes. That's her lil buddy now. It takes an embarrassingly long time for Fiona to remember that sheep aren't normally allowed in offices and by that point it's too late. That's her buddy now too. How did they even get to this point.

monty-glasses-roxy

If I stick with this, I think Roxy's gonna call the sheep Rhino. She learned what a rhino was the week prior to this and she thinks they're cool as shit so this random little lamb following her around gets to be called Rhino now.

This doesn't solve the problem that set Roxy up to having a pet in the first place though. Like, it may help temporarily but uhhh sheep shouldn't really be kept on their own, they really need a flock which poses it's own problems, and that sorta leaves Roxy almost back at square one?

I dunno, maybe she gets a couple of fish or something and she just sits there for several hours a day watching them like a lava lamp.

#I think I might have it be Roxy's general naming system to name things after something she's recently discovered is a Thing that Exists #because you can get names like Rhino's but it also means you're gonna have some poor fish called Cactus or something #fiona lives au #what does Fiona think of this development you might ask? uhh well #she doesn't have to worry about sheep following Roxy into the house or MCM as much? it still happens of course but ya know. less.#she's glad Roxy's got a hobby and she's glad it's just as unexpected yet completely expected as she thought it should be #this hobby of course being Sheep. and maybe fish I guess? I dunno #maybe sheep won't work at all even I dunno but there's a lot of things going on with Roxy that makes it pretty clear she's getting a pet #and currently Rhino the Sheep is the best I've got and I like her a lot actually #and you just KNOW if she gets fish with her powers and the powers of the MCM combined she's getting the world's most insane fish tank.#that shit is bioactive or whatever it's called and is the most over the top detailed thing you've ever seen #but I'm also not sure fish would help much in this situation either so this is a bit of an Issue.#Stan making her an animatronic pet is an option but animatronic sheep feels a little cheap #maybe a tortoise would be funny? I dunno there's a lot of options here

So Fiona Lives AU has the perfect set up for Roxy to get a pet of some kind and I've been really unsure on what she would decide on, what would work best for her and what Fiona would tolerate in the house but for some reason, for the last day and a half, I've slowly been getting attached to the idea that Roxy ends up with a pet sheep.

Just... accidentally adopts a little pet lamb from a nearby farm. It hangs out with her around MCM sometimes. That's her lil buddy now. It takes an embarrassingly long time for Fiona to remember that sheep aren't normally allowed in offices and by that point it's too late. That's her buddy now too. How did they even get to this point.

#fiona lives au #it could be really funny if this just sorta escalated over time too. sheep are flock animals they're not usually on their own #so at some point they get another sheep (intentionally this time) so it won't be lonely but two sheep isn't really a flock so they get ano-#you get me? it would be kinda funny. it would also be funny if this happens so unintentionally that they don't realise roxy has pet now #neither of them realise. fiona just sorta got used to this sheep thing without even really trying and at some point someone asks #'uhhh why is there a sheep in the break room??' and fiona goes to answer but the reality of the situation hits her like a truck #when did that happen?? that's not a lamb any more that's a full grown sheep?? is this roxy's pet now?? did we agree to that???? wait #wait wait wait why IS there a sheep in the staff room???? did she say it could be in there??? when did that happen??? hold up what wait hel #holy shit there's a sheep living in her house what the fuck...#maybe it's this realisation that makes her think 'okay wait so. is this good for the sheep?' and this causes the first domino to fall #and the next time reality hits her is when they have like... six of them living outside her house or something #make no mistake though any sheep in this situation are getting spoiled fucking rotten and are loved immensely #but it IS pretty funny if this was a complete accident. and to be honest if I DO give Roxy a sheep for a pet?#how the fuck else would it happen? who thinks 'I want a pet lemme just go buy a sheep to live in my house with me' ya know???#....... well Roxy would but this is because the concept of pets and having an actual house to live in are incredibly new concepts to her #she's not Bound by the same understanding of these things as Fiona or anyone else would be. she's only just learned what a sheep even is.#listen Fiona is great but she can't be on the ball about EVERYTHING okay? she was being VERY responsible and patient with Roxy-#-when she started asking about getting a pet and did her best to teach her how to go about it responsibly...#she just didn't realise the sheep was going to become the pet. she was under the impression it was going home at some point.#even Roxy was still talking about getting a pet while they had this sheep in their care and they'd agreed no matter what they'd wait until-#-this whole sheep situation was sorted but then it never got sorted and ohhhh nooo they have a pet sheep now... oops...?#she's friends with the farmer it belonged to it's fine the farmer got to watch this happen in real time from the outside and was just #wondering how long it would take for Fiona to realise what was going on here. honestly a lot of people are.#people have asked when the sheep is going home and talked to her about how attached Roxy's been getting to it #but hey don't worry everything's being taken care of and the sheep will be home soon don't worry :)#she didn't realise its home was her own fucking house until it was WAAAYYY too late to do anything about it lmao #she didn't expect Roxy to have a normal pet anyway. it's fine.#Roxy has never once asked for anything normal in her fucking life why would she start now.#Fiona can practically feel Edwin and David fucking CACKLING over this in their graves. she Knows.#this is the kind of thing she used to try and prevent Edwin from doing. oh she fucking KNOWS he's having a GREAT time with this.

jessepinwheel

okay here's a poll

fanfic is for

shipping

torment nexus

Voting ended onJul 27

no you don't get to say both or neither or a secret third thing. pick a side.

#WHO DOESN'T LOVE THE TORMENT NEXUS??!!

Oh god did we get a new spot the difference fnaf teaser? Ohhh

#I mean I'm interested but also. ohhhhhh here we go again... lmao #pop rox talks

redstonedust

a week into artfight i would like to give out the following reminders: it is okay if you thought you were going to participate but ended up not having time. it is fine if you started out enthused and then lost steam. you do not owe anyone revenges. you are not 'behind' and you are not letting anybody down. it is a silly little game for fun. do not forget this.

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Would be kinda funny if in trying to find herself a job to do at MCM, Roxy discovers her true calling in life as a sheepdog.

#fiona lives au #it has practical use to Fazbear if they gave her herding dog programming so it makes sense if you think about it #but it would be kind of funny if the role she fits into and loves the most is being the local sheepdog #fiona: okay... so we have to find a way to keep sheep now I guess. or ducks or cows or whatever else she can herd. okay then.#to be fair I don't think she would have seen this coming either. like she can predict a lot of stuff about Roxy and where she'll go #and she's usually right but I don't think she'd predict this one ngl #when it happens and Fiona realises this is what Roxy wants to do now... well she's not surprised by it but she IS surprised she didn't-#-think of it before lmao it just seems so obvious now ya know?? crazy

spin-the-wheel-polls

you have won a lifetime supply of this

How do you feel?

good!

I CAN SELL THIS AND GET RICH

im drowning in my supply help

Eh it's okay

BAD. VERY BAD

results/other

Voting ended onJul 15

you would receive the supply once a month

the brand/type will vary so you could

you can sell the things you get/give them away but they will keep coming until you die

#nail varnish... aight #I mean yeah I guess I can sell it? share it with my niece maybe?#ehh???#there's worse things on the list to be fair. definitely better things though

Did I not tell you guys about the Fiona Lives AU dream I had the other night?? Fuck

Basically I dreamt about this scene where Edwin essentially says to Fiona, "I suck at this." but in more emotional words, Fiona replies, "yeah..." and Edwin just... gives her the MCM. Like, he's not the boss any more, it's Fiona now. Fiona's house now.

Edwin recognised that he'd been taken advantage of by William and that he sucked at the business side of his work and that he didn't really know what he was doing when it came to running an entire company, so he just... gave it to Fiona. Cause she's been trying to keep up with all of that stuff for him in the background where she can anyway.

I don't know why, but when I woke up after this I thought it was really funny. Not sure if it was because Edwin realising he sucks is so wildly out of character for him or what but yeah basically Edwin just hands her MCM while she stands there bewildered like "huh??? I mean, I agree with you but, what???"

#fiona lives au #actually that might have been what I found so funny. in the dream fiona just fucking agrees with him when he explains how much he sucks #he goes on this long spiel about all the ways he's fucked up and at the end of it Fiona was just like 'yup.'#I don't think she WOULD do that but she did in the dream and maybe that was where the funny came from lmao #anyway the heatwave is going to get worse apparently and I'm already dying have this post

Around 30℃ today... this is absurd...

#pop rox talks #<- dying. I've been dying all day. nightmare scenario.

Would it be funny if Fiona in Fiona Lives AU says that Afton was a chain smoker. I feel like of all the people to be an avid smoker, it could be a little funny if it's Ol' Billy A.

#do I need to explain this one? I can't tell lmao #fiona lives au

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Hey, does anyone know what it means when a crow knocks on your window? Cause a crow just knocked on my window like it wanted something and I can't figure out what it wanted to gain from this

#pop rox talks #I'm puzzled. what did it want??? last time a crow tried to get my attention they herded the cat through the door #so??? what's up with this???

Wait so I'm watching the new Fuhnaff video and I have to pause it because uh. Vanessa's dad is called Bill?? Is this for real???

Because uh. Something I somewhat recently found out was that Bill is an old and very common nickname for William. Don't ask me why, I don't know, but it is.

I dunno if this means anything at all it's just made me go "hey??? The fuck are you talking about????" and I had to share this.

#that's insane... I even made a joke to a friend that I was gonna start calling him Billy A. and that he only got away with it-#-because no one could remember if he was a Will or a Bill... I'm gonna go insane if this is somehow relevant I was JOKING #I swear to god... head in hands... why is. why is any of this. ya know? what.#lmao that's crazy though imagine Billy A actually being a thing that'd be real funny. for me at least anyway lmao

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