bad moon on the rise

All the hardest, coldest people you meet were once as soft as water. And that’s the tragedy of living.

Sawyer’s breath shook, the girl desperately trying to control her crying. Her entire body quivered as the redhead never learned how to hide her tears, always privileged with a support system that caused her to never hide how she felt, never fear what might happen to her if she was nothing but honest and genuine. Despite this fact, she still tried to wipe away her tears at Molly came up behind her. She shook her head, falling into sobs once more as she tried to articulate what was wrong.

“It’s okay to cry Sawyer.” A utterance, smoothed and laced in something ambrosia pure. It wasn’t much of a lie, in fact it could brush skins with truth. It wasn’t a lie, her tone made that clear. But it was borderline weary and borderline comforting. Adequate enough not to illustrate the nerve wrecking against her palm -- unexplained emotions made her distressed. Especially, with the life they lead and the graveyard of secrets they had built their business on. The wrong person finding out the wrong secret could end them up, and the daughter of the law enforcement would be so. She’s not as well at soothing as she usually is, Molly blamed her state of well being, and it was justified in that.

The fact that Molly wasn’t saying anything was almost as concerning as the fact that she was attacked in the first place. What happened to her? Did someone in the Cacciatore do this? Aria was more worried about Molly than anything, but that nagging question remained in the back of her mind, terrifying her slowly as she tried to treat the other woman. “Molly.” She whispered her name, as she knew that if she spoke much louder her voice would crack and break with worry and fear and she didn’t need to upset her anymore. “Molly, sweetie. Can you talk? I need you to say something..” She spoke once more, only with a little bit more conviction than she did before.

Hesitation was the most palpable emotion on her face, as her crystal blue stare spanned. Her lips cracked open to speak, though she knew of no answer to reply -- it was just what was asked of her, and Molly was good at doing what was wanted of her, it was how she had done away with her moral conscience afterall. Aria spoke again, and Molly heard it through ringing ears. A response that wanted to come -- that wanted to crawl up her throat and be answered -- but nothing, there was nothing. She felt like her bones were chillingly still and it was just the rest of her that couldn’t stop rattling. Instead viridescent eyes shifted back to the window and the the blackness of the sky. watching a storm assemble itself, infusing deep catastrophe, in her skull and outside.

1. A broken down jukebox with a disappearing voice. 2. The ghost who writes about what she would do if she were still alive. 3. The pills he hid underneath his box-spring. The ones he never talked about in front of anyone but swallowed down once the emptiness started kissing his neck again. 4. The name that bleeds out of my mother’s mouth. 5. A rotting poem in the backseat of an abandoned car. 6. A dying rose in a garden full of weeds. 7. The apology your father never gave you. 8. Melted ice-cream on the August asphalt. 9. Sharp rocks sitting at the bottom of a lake. 10.Someone who knew how to write this.

I still love you (9:05pm) no I don’t. (9:06pm) I’m so confused. why did this happen. (2:26am) I want you to be happy. if this is what it takes then I’m okay with it. be happy. for me. please. (10:45am) don’t you ever give up. (12:02am) I kind of hate you for leaving me. (8:57pm) but I still love you. (8:59pm) I won’t look at you in person but I talk to you in my head (11:14am) you’re a better listener this way. (11:15am) I’m sorry. (1:43am) maybe if I wasn’t so fucked up this wouldn’t have happened (3:37am) no. it’s not my fault. (3:38am) but it kind of is. (3:39am) I hate this (2:00pm) I don’t know who I am without you. (12:01am) why can’t things be like they were before (10:13am) please come back to me. I need you. you need me. (1:58am) we are so goddamn bad for each other it’s beautiful. I’m addicted to our heartbreak. (4:06am) I went through our old messages. I cried because you promised to always be there. you lied. (9:16pm) you smiled at me in the hall today. i thought my chest was being ripped open (11:36pm) I’m glad you’re smiling though. (11:37pm)