hi i’m Teddy

im glad we're in the internet backwaters i think if dove chocolate or something replied to my post i would just keep reporting them for terorism again and again and again

sometimes i randomly think about how much this post sucks and start laughing really hard

say what you will about john mcafee (and you should.) but that guy could fucking post

say what you will about john mcafee (and you should.) but that guy could fucking post

basketball dracula isn't real dude he can't-- *sudden squeaking noises from the shadows*

*two pool toys having sex tumble by in the wind* oh thank god

*thunderous slam dunk noise*

I hate gamers…

skyrim fans, grab your shouting

Pokemon fans, grab your balls

this event is cancelled

princess peach at the sperm bank

nothing could have prepared me for that comment

mario at the sperm bank

This, too, is yuri

Is there a reversed version of this I can use to tell my lesbian friends I think they’re a bad fit?

i didnt

what’s wrong? you’ve barely touched my spores

touch my spores.

why aren’t you touching them

why do you hate spores. and me. and potential losses of autonomy