I wrote a fic!
It has been literal years since I wrote any kind of fanfic. But after scrolling Pinterest and seeing a gorgeous fanart of Syaoran with glasses… I couldn’t get this out of my head.
Apologies to my boss, this is definitely what I spent the majority of my shift on today. Hyperfixations and such.
SyaoSaku, post Clear Card.
Syaoran had been looking at himself in the mirror for longer than was entirely necessary. The problem was that the person looking back at him seemed somewhat unfamiliar. Like someone had drawn him but made a deliberate mistake.
And he knew exactly why that was.
It was his first day wearing his new glasses. He had tried for weeks to put this moment off. It had started with the occasional squint at the board in class. But it had progressed. He was regularly straining his eyes to read the class notes now. Some kanji blurred together into frustrating smudges, making them even more difficult to differentiate from the Chinese characters he was more familiar with. Eventually the teachers had noticed. One teacher had even approached him to check in and make sure he was okay, aware that he was living alone.
But then Sakura had started to comment also. She would look at him with that worried expression that made his heart hurt when he would rub his eyes mid study session. She would ask him softly if everything was okay and look unconvinced when he would reply with a nonchalant ‘It’s fine’.
Eventually, he began to realise that the issue wasn’t going away. He could no longer pass it off as being tired. So he had reluctantly booked the appointment with an optometrist.
And sure enough, he had walked away from the appointment with a pair of glasses that made his stomach sink for reasons he couldn’t really pinpoint. It wasn’t like they didn’t help. When he had put them on for the first time the world had suddenly felt sharp again. Street signs came into focus, his eyes were able to relax and the tension he was holding in his jaw melted away. He even noticed a subtle layer of fine dust settling itself on his drawers that he hadn’t noticed before (Wei would be shocked, he inwardly thought).
But to be reliant on something was not in Syaoran’s nature. He prided himself on his independence. He had been raised to be strong. Needing to rely on glasses to be able to function daily felt wrong. It wasn’t that he was worried about being weak exactly. Millions of people wore glasses daily. Even Eriol, and to that point Clow Reed, wore glasses, some of the strongest sorcerers in history.
And then there was Sakura. He knew in his heart that this would make her think no less of him. Yet his stomach twisted unpleasantly when he thought about what she might think when she saw them.
Giving his head a light shake, he steadied himself for the day before grabbing his school bag and walking out the door. He had stared at his reflection for long enough. The glasses weren’t going away. Delaying the inevitable wouldn’t change that.
While walking to school he sent his usual good morning message to Sakura. He felt a lightness in his chest as he typed the words with an ease that reminded him of the benefits of the glasses. He could read the characters more easily today.
- Good morning, Sakura.
He hesitated. Usually, the words came easy. But his stomach felt like it was filled with butterflies today. He continued to type, feeling that uneasy feeling return. He decided not to mention anything yet.
- I hope you slept well. I’ll meet you at the gates before school.
His thumb hovered momentarily before pressing send.
Sighing, he continued to walk, feeling the spring breeze as it rustled the cherry blossom flowers in the trees. Flowers that just yesterday looked like white and pink blobs, now appearing in high definition.
—
As he stood and waited at the school gates, Syaoran’s stomach continued to twist and turn. He felt it leap into his throat every time another student turned the corner, settling itself a little more unsteadily each time he realised it wasn’t Sakura.
After what felt like an eternity, a figure appeared that he hadn’t been anticipating, though internally he cursed himself for not preparing for this moment earlier.
Tomoyo waved gently as she saw him from a distance. He ducked his head slightly and returned the wave hesitantly.
“Good morning, Li-kun,” Tomoyo chirped brightly in her usual soft tone.
And then it happened. As she walked ever closer to him, he saw her expression change from her usual, friendly smile, to one of… He considered her expression frantically… was it shock? Bewilderment? Fear?
Tomoyo stopped directly in front of him, considering him for a moment before speaking.
“Oh my!” She gasped softly.
He wanted the ground to open and swallow him completely.
Then Tomoyo did something completely unexpected. She clapped her hands together in front of her, and her mouth broke into a wide grin.
“What a wonderful opportunity so early in the morning! A chance to record Sakura-chan’s reaction to Li-kun looking extra handsome in his new glasses.”
She was already rummaging in her bag, for her phone, or video camera, Syaoran wasn’t quite sure. He hesitated again.
“Extra handsome?” Syaoran echoed.
“Why yes, of course!” Tomoyo quipped as if she had merely remarked on the day’s weather.
Syaoran felt the heat rise in his face. His stomach was now twisting more than ever. Oh no.
“Now, where is Sakura-chan?” Tomoyo questioned, turning the phone in her hands to video mode and pointing it squarely in the direction that Sakura would arrive from. “I expect she’ll be here any moment.”
He had not been prepared for this. He had not thought that there might be compliments. He was briefly visited by the urge to run. But he wasn’t that young schoolboy trying to escape his feelings anymore. No. He had trained himself to be able to control his emotions when they spiralled. He took a deep breath before re-centring himself, his face a deep shade of red, he was sure.
And then she was there. Walking directly towards him. Her face glowing with a brilliant smile, she raised her hand high above her head to wave to the two of them.
“Tomoyo-chan! Syaoran-kun! Good morning!”
She bounded towards them, every step closer bringing an unpleasant lurch in Syaoran’s stomach.
As she drew closer, her face still gleaming like sunlight, he saw the falter. He saw the change of her expression to one of consideration. Her eyes widened slightly before she let out a noise like a hiccup, drawing one clenched fist to her mouth.
“I-I got glasses,” the words had left his mouth before he could stop them. He continued, speaking much quicker than necessary, “I’ve been having trouble seeing for a while now, and the teachers started asking if everything was okay, and I didn’t tell you because I didn’t want to worry you… and…”
He trailed off, not exactly sure what he was trying to say.
“And…” He repeated, slightly dazed now.
Silence. Syaoran felt the heaviness of the silence sink through his body. Sakura was still looking at him, a little pink in the cheeks now, he noticed. He felt his own face burn again.
Tomoyo was the one to break the silence.
“Sakura-chan?” She prompted gently. “What do you think?”
Sakura looked at Tomoyo as if she was surprised to see her standing there. Tomoyo smiled gently and let out a soft giggle.
“What do I think…?” Sakura repeated in such a small voice he had to strain to hear it. “Oh!”
From the distant school, Syaoran heard the bell chime gently through the air.
Grateful for the distraction, Syaoran blurted out, “We’d better get to class or we’ll be late!” Before hurrying off towards his class, head hung low again and avoiding eye contact with any peers he came across.
—
From the moment he stepped into homeroom, he wanted the day to be over. People stared at him. They pointed at him and whispered behind their hands. Some people were less subtle and would comment directly to his face. No one seemed to think the glasses were bad. On the contrary many people complimented him. But he could feel all eyes were on him, and the attention was deeply unsettling.
And apart from all the unwanted attention, Sakura had seemed so flustered that she had barely spoken a word to him. His heart sank at the thought.
Looks came from every direction in the halls as well. Moving between classes everyone seemed to be discussing his new glasses. He had heard the word ‘cute’ muttered from quite a few girls now too.
Reaching his next class, he quickly sat in his usual seat, resting his forehead on one hand and muttering to himself in Cantonese.
He didn’t look up as his classmates filed into the classroom. A gentle tap on his shoulder broke him out of his daze, and he was shocked to see Sakura standing behind him.
“Sakura!? But, you’re not in this class!”
She looked at him guiltily and spoke quickly.
“I know, I have to get to my class, but I just wanted to ask if you could meet me at lunchtime?”
“O-of course,” he stuttered out.
She smiled at him as she started to reverse back out of the classroom.
“Great. Then, I’ll see you at lunch.”
As quickly as she had appeared, she ran out of the classroom. Syaoran wasn’t sure whether to feel relieved or terrified, but one thing was for sure. The smile she had given him had filled his whole body with warmth, and his tension eased just slightly.
—
It felt like an eternity until the lunch bell chimed.
By lunch the comments from passersby had eased. He no longer felt like he was being watched everywhere he went. The relief he felt was immense and instant. But despite that, his stomach was still knotting itself together, because now it was time to see Sakura properly. No distractions, no classmates watching, and no Tomoyo filming, or so he hoped.
He found her waiting under a tree in their usual spot. The air was warm against his skin as he walked over to her. While she was still smiling at him, he could feel that sense of dread returning.
“Hi!” She said happily as he reached her.
Syaoran’s voice caught in his throat.
“Hi.” He replied, mentally kicking himself.
But then she did something he had not expected. She reached out and gently took his hand.
“I’m sorry about this morning.”
“Sorry…? Oh, it’s fine.” He tried to sound casual, but his voice kept coming out a bit raspier than normal. “It’s nothing, really.”
She squeezed his hand. The small movement felt surprisingly reassuring.
“It must have been hard coming to school today. You must have felt worried.”
He had. He really had. He had so much trouble finding the right word for his emotions, and here she was voicing it like it was the easiest thing in the world.
He looked away. Not in the complete opposite direction, but just over her shoulder.
“I didn’t realise it would bother me. I know it’s silly.”
She shook her head in response.
“No, it’s not silly.” Her grip on his hand tightened, grounding him. “It’s okay to be worried sometimes, Syaoran.”
He looked back at her.
“It’s not even about the glasses. Most of all…” he swallowed. “I was worried about you. And I don’t even know why.”
“You were worried about how I would react?”
“I guess so,” he sighed.
Sakura stepped closer to him now. He felt his face burning red again as she looked directly into his eyes and took his other hand. A pink flush was slowly creeping up her cheeks again, though she smiled at him just as brilliantly as any other time.
“Syaoran, I don’t care whether you wear glasses or not.”
Her voice was soft and gentle, but there was certainty in her words.
“All I care about is you. You’re my number one person, remember?”
His breath caught. The words were spoken so simply, as though they explained everything. And maybe they did.
For the first time that day, he smiled. A truly genuine smile.
“I know,” was all he managed as he took her other hand, mirroring her and squeezing it gently.
“And I’m sorry again that I worried you more this morning.”
“Sakura, you don’t have to apologise…”
“I do.”
It was Sakura’s turn to look away as her cheeks flushed a red deeper than he had seen since they were young, flustered teenagers.
“I couldn’t think straight because…”
She shifted her feet nervously.
“Well because they really suit you.”
Syaoran froze again.
“They make you look more mature, and really handsome.”
Neither of them knew where to look as Syaoran stuttered out, “O-oh. Th-thank you.”
Syaoran reached up and touched the frame of his glasses, adjusting them almost by second nature. For the first time since leaving the optometrist, they didn’t feel quite so strange.
Sakura smiled at him, watching him fondly.
“What is it?” he asked gently.
“Nothing.” She said, though her smile lingered a little longer than normal. She began to steer him back towards the school.
“I made extra sweets with Kero-chan last night and brought you some to have with lunch. Will you join me?”
“I’d love to.”
He smiled as they walked together. Her hand felt like such a grounding force in his. He felt his stomach settle as the nervous energy he had been carrying around all day left him.
Everything was definitely going to be alright.













