âDoomsday cheat sheetâ
DISCLAIMER: this is a comprehensive road map or âcheat sheetâ that I originally created for my own personal use. I used my own experiences, othersâ experiences (shoutout to @lyft1ngburn3r âs post in specific), and research Iâve done to create this. Itâs extremely important to know this information, and know it well, so even under pressure you can reference back to it to keep yourself safe.
If caught by someone who has no legal power to physically stop you (like employees and LP): just get the hell away. Loss Prevention doesnât have a badge; they are staff, not officers, so they have no legal power to physically restrain or search you. Walk, run, drive off, etc. No matter how intense the situation is, just GET AWAY. Even if you are scared and you feel like youâre going to shit your pants, running is ALWAYS better than having cops haul you off in handcuffs or catching a charge. Try not to run unless you absolutely need to, it draws attention. They may try to block the exit, so in an emergency situation like that just fucking BOOK IT. Donât give them your ID, ever. Donât give them your real name. Do not admit to anything. If the situation isnât too tense, you can ask them if theyâd like to see the inside of your bag or show them yourself if you body concealed to appear less suspicious. If they threaten to call the cops, fine, but donât wait around for them and get the hell out.
If you are stopped by police in store or police who were called:
First, ask if you are free to go. Get a CLEAR YES OR NO.
If they say yes, calmly walk away.
If they say no, you are being detained and no longer have the legal right to walk away. Being detained is not the same as being arrested, think of it as being held. In which case you need to COOPERATE!!! In this instance, I donât recommend running. Most police will chase you and âevading arrestâ can result in another/higher charge. If you think you can get away, it is up to you to take that risk. DO NOT get physical with police. You WILL be locked up for that, assault of law enforcement is never taken lightly.
> The officer will ask for your: name, address, and ID. Again, COOPERATE with them. Giving false information can result in another/higher charge.
(If you are a minor, a legal guardian is needed to confirm your information. If you are not being arrested and think they will go along, you can choose to give them false information and have your guardian âconfirmâ it then be on your merry way. Again, only do this if you think your legal guardian will back you up and if you are not being arrested. Even as a minor, you will need to provide your real information in the event of an arrest. If youâre a minor they are also not legally allowed to take photos of you.)
> The officer may legally FRISK you during detainment (this is an EXTERNAL pat down of yourself and your bags if they have REASONABLE SUSPICION that they are in danger or that you are armed), but you do not have to consent to it. The officer may listen or may not. Say âI do not consent to this searchâ as it may stop them and it may come in handy later should the situation escalate.
If you are being arrested, the officer may legally SEARCH you (this is more invasive and can include going through your pockets, bags, closed containers, feeling the inside of your waistband, removing your shoes and/or hat, and shaking out your bra if you are wearing one), but again you do not have to consent. Say âI do not consent to this searchâ. DO NOT empty your pockets, as this is consenting to a search.
> After that, SHUT THE FUCK UP. Say you are going to remain silent and that you would like to speak to an attorney, then BE SILENT. I cannot stress this enough, do not give up any information that you donât have to. Do not sign ANYTHING or speak to ANYONE about details of your arrest until you have an attorney present.
In other words: if there are no cops involved, you are still in the clear if you can get away. RUN LIKE YOUR CRIMINAL RECORD DEPENDS ON IT! If cops are involved, shut the fuck up and comply. Hope that they donât have enough to arrest/charge you or that they choose not to. They might just put your name into the storeâs system and take your picture, in which case be grateful. Who needs their stinky merch anyway.
Please be safe out there. I was arrested when I was 12 for l!fting at Cl@/reâs and it was incredibly traumatic. Some people are genuinely deranged and enjoy punishing people they deem less worthy of respect than them. They will not hesitate to fuck your life up over a lipgloss, so in turn donât hesitate to do whatever it takes to protect yourself. Lots of love from this stranger to you, my messages and asks are always open <3