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Dom drop is an emotional and physical low a Dom may feel after a BDSM scene. And can bring feelings such as depression, anxiety, or guilt.

Dom drop can come moments to days after a scene. And can last up to weeks at a time if not properly taken care of. Some people experience Dom drop often and some have never experienced it even after years of play.

Dom drop can be caused by:

- Feeling exhausted from all of the physical and/or mental work you put into a scene.

- The drop of adrenaline and dopamine after a scene.

- Disappointment if the scene didn’t go as you’d hoped.

- Doing something at your Submissive's request that conflicts with your morals.

for me, thuddy, deep pressure pain is a pain I enjoy directly - I can endure it with little issue, and it makes me feel good. I absolutely cannot abide pain that threatens my joint stability or causes grinding/aching in my shoulders and arms, and it takes me out of the scene/headspace when I feel this - I have to be very careful with rope, and to hold my legs in the exact right way so my knees don't lock at the right moment.

But stingy pain, the sort of pain that comes from a wet palm, or a single-tail whip, is a pain I hate - it takes everything I have not to squirm away from it, but it's also the pain that takes me furthest over the edge. When that kind of pain hits, it's flying - I'm out of my body, suspended by the blow and blown by the aftershocks.

It depends on the personality and people involved, of course. With my partner and I, I think we started hitting that level by accident, after the (beloathèd) shock-stick discharged badly on my clit during a scene - not enough to seriously harm me, thankfully. (My partner spent the next day testing the shock stick over and over until he identified what it was that caused it, and how to replicate it, so he would never do that by accident again, and so he could replicate it at will. Have I mentioned how much I love him?) But after that moment, the scene reached a whole different plane of existence.

1. Talk sexpectations. What do you want to do? What do you want done to you? What are some things you like or don't like? Discuss wants, needs, accommodations, and triggers.

2. Enjoy a date! Hang out, eat dinner, play a game. Get back to baseline and settle from the anxiety and awkwardness of talking about all your hopes and fears and feelings.

3. Fuck. Have fun! Take breaks! Hydrate! Try a bunch of positions and try to make sure everyone gets plenty of attention.