im so close to being done with finals which means iâll Actually have time to write here soon but if youâd like to plot or smthin in the meantime, my discord is sunny d! alright!#6788
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PUT YOUR BEARD IN MY MOUTH

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â
DEAR READER
almost home

if i look back, i am lost

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@misersea
im so close to being done with finals which means iâll Actually have time to write here soon but if youâd like to plot or smthin in the meantime, my discord is sunny d! alright!#6788

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back on my fallout shit lmao
the foxman taken from the 1977 gary paulsen book.
itâs strange, how things happen and they donât turn out like you think they will.
iâm sorry we fought.
a little sleep and youâll be as good as new.
arenât you going to eat?
youâve got to live.
and thatâs a kind of love. having somebody do that for you.
because itâs snowing. hard.
youâre awake. how do you feel?Â
drink it hot so it gets down.
thank you for saving me.
youâre still here.
itâs nothing to worry about. you go to sleep.
i was afraid.
there isnât much time to be a kid out here.
you rest for now.
donât die.
kind of cut my arm. a little.
damn, it seems like yesterday.
but life has a way of pulling the rug out from under you just when you need it least.
i fought sleep as hard as i could.
you canât stay here, youâll die.
there was beauty then â beauty and love. then it all went to hell.
iâll stay as long as it takes, as long as you need me.
just double-checking to make sure there isnât anything wrong.
i know, i know. itâs all right now.
what time is it?
youâll spend the night.
donât worry â itâs all over now.
go away. leave me alone.
it seems like everything they call growing up has to jerk your guts out and just about wreck you and iâve never been able to understand why thatâs supposed to be good for you.Â
it just sounded dumb to me.
which made what happened a lot harder to live with, i can tell you.
sometimes it would be nice if life just kept happening the way itâs happening, if things got to a good place and just stayed there, didnât change.
they have to try or it was all for nothing, and nobody likes to do something all for nothing.
this place gives me the creeps.
itâs dumber than falling in love and freezing your ears until the lobes almost fall off.
i think itâs sad. thatâs what i think.
always ask the second question. donât just ask why, but why why?Â
i figured youâd need a colorful picture to look at â cheer you up.
so nothing. never mind.
i just wanted to see you, i guess, talk to you.
weâre about the same age but you act a lot more grown up.Â
there was no way to tell it was going to happen the way it happened, no way to stop it, really, even if iâd known it was coming.
i was thinking of a time and place that you couldnât understand and should never have to understand.
Maren.. we gotta save this dog gone wasteland.
     â  tĂĄ brĂłn orm âŚÂ erm ,  an bhfuil aithne agam ort ?  â
feel free to change things  ( such as pronouns )  as needed ! music link
G U E S TÂ Â R O O M
â iâm better off on my own â â i wish i never let you sleep in my bed â â iâll never get over you â â iâm pretty sure that all of this was my fault â â you know how to make me feel all alone â â just fucking find another way to heal â â iâm sick of feeling so betrayed â â i thought iâd mean something to you â
S A I N T S
â your story isnât adding up â â your religion is a lie â â why donât you throw me to the wolves ? â â youâre not so innocent â â youâre standing here like an angry god â â youâre no saint , youâre no savior â â you only follow rules if others follow with you â â that doesnât sound so holy , only playing victim â â keep your judgement for someone else â â iâve had enough â
1 2 1 6
â welcome to the room i hide in â â iâd invite you in but iâm trying to get out of here â â the windows know my pain , they feel it â â get out of here â â youâre still ringing gin my empty head â â i canât let go of you â â i donât know why i can never leave â â all that iâm left with are memories â â i guess i want your ghost as my company â
R E V I V A L
â iâm afraid that iâve gone vacant â â i donât have time for your equations â â i swear iâll try to save this â â i start to despise myself â â you say i put you through hell â â you never knew if you could feel the way that i do â â we arenât gonna make it â â weâve both been changing â â maybe we should find ourselves â
V A C A N T
â iâve been waiting for you to get your mind right â â youâve been running from yourself for a while â â you think that if you burn down youâll be fine â â maybe iâd forget all the times you lied â â i hope that you choke on your vacant teeth â â i know that youâre empty â â you donât even look the same with your brand new eyes â â you drained the light out of yourself and now you canât see â
E U P H O R I A
â you talk a lot of shit for somebody whoâs sorry now â â iâm a habit that you miss â â this is everything i wanna say , but canât say yet â â youâre looking for someone to blame â â i gave you all my blood â â iâm still waiting for your love â â thanks for calling me on my birthday to say i was wrong â â i hope you swallow me â
G R A V E S
â every time i see you i light up inside â â truth is casting shadows all over me â â you walk through your house like a ghost â â i hope you lie in your bed thinking of me â â thereâs a hole inside my chest you canât see â â my heads a burial ground of your memory â â you can take whats left with you â â i canât keep holding on â

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donât they know âââ
               itâs the end of the world ?Â
I aim to be lionhearted, but my hands still shake and my voice isnât quite loud enough.
Michelle K. (via wordsnquotes)
just a lil heads up i have a big ass essay i realized just this morning i need to get done by friday so activity may be very very sporadic / nonexistent for this week! im sorry!!
everything here is beautiful taken from the 2018 mira t. lee book.
you canât keep doing this to yourself.
everywhere we go, we rebuild.
iâm sorry youâre sad.
six words. some days one. some days none.
itâs just the ER.
you need to get better.
i miss you, too.
jesus christ. are you hurt?
we spent two days together in the hospital room.
you need to eat. youâre so thin, ___.
there is your home. there is your family.
you said. over the phone.
please take care of yourself. your health is important.
until you feel better. only until you feel better.
itâs none of your business.
guess what? i was crying, too.
this hospital is bullshit.
itâs a doctorâs office. no police, no guards.
please, you need to be more careful. you could have burned the whole house down.
this room makes me uncomfortable.
i donât trust hospitals.
___, this behavior, itâs dangerous. iâm worried.
doctors donât know anything about how i feel. i want to go home.
when one hurts, you all hurt.
you got a bed, your meals, the meds â all inclusive, baby. itâs the fuckinâ holiday inn.
â this place gives me the creeps.  â
â â â Â the foxman ââ acc. / â @toasterdadâ â
       hands  fidget  in  adjusting  their  grip  once  again  on  her  gun  ,  eyes  scanning  the  shadows  for  any  violent  visitors  .  all  that  meets  her  senses  ,  however  ,  is  the  creaks  &  groans  of  an  old  building  settling  itself  âââ  no  signs  of  life  besides  the  two  of  them  .  just  barely  does  her  guard  drop  once  it  seems  the  coast  is  clear  ,  muscles  relaxing  &  less  ready  to  jump  into  action  .  â  it  ,  uh  , could  definitely  use  a  bit  a  remodelinâ  ⌠ â  a  toe  of  her  boot  nudges  some  of  the  debris  ,  covered  in  dust  ,  that  litters  the  floor  . â  letâs  not  stay  here  any  longer  than  we  have  to  ,  yeah  ? â

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cottonbellesâ.
@misersea
ă đŁ ăâ âHey kid,â a woman leaning against the Old State House calls to the young lady; she was tall, tanned, and had brilliant blue eyes, and those eyes could tell right away that this kid was too clean-looking to be a normal Goodneighbor street-urchin.
    âYou lost or something? You donât look like you should be drifting through Goodneighbor on your own. You come from a Vault or something, kiddo?â She didnât seem to be aware of how old the girl was, though, assuming her for a younger teen than an eighteen year oldâ age was a tricky thing sometimes.
          heart was already racing before she even made it through the town gate , the road here so dangerous & tricky , but despite being in what could be considered somewhat  safe walls , the fear that made her heart beat so fast didnât disappear . a voice calling out to her , however , only caused her to jump slightly & the strangerâs attention did little to help her anxiety .
         â o - oh , no , iâm not lost . . . just need to restock & this was the closest place .  â gods , was she terrified that this was a trap of some kind & perhaps the slight shake to her voice betrayed those worries . shoulders shrug at the last question , fingers idly wandering over the grooves & dents & scratches of the pipboy on her arm .  â something like that , i guess . . .  â
GENERAL
âCan you walk?â
âHow did this happen?â
âWhat the hell happened?â
âI hit my head.â
âDid you hit your head?â
âCan you hear me?â
âDonât close your eyes, stay awake!â
âCome on, stay with me!â
âNo no no no no!â
âYou shot me!â
âI didnât mean to shoot you!â
âYou stabbed me!â
âI didnât mean to stab you!â
âTake the knife out!â
âDonât take the knife out!â
âIt was an accident!â
âThat/this wasnât an accident!â
âThat looks broken.â
âI think my leg/arm is broken.â
âThat doesnât look good.â
âAm I going to die?â
âYouâre not going to die!â
âCalm down!â
âDonât panic!â
âI canât help you if you donât let me!â
BLOOD
âAre you bleeding?â
âDonât move, youâre bleeding.â
âIs that blood?â
âWhose blood is that?â
âThatâs a lot of blood.â
âDo you know how to get bloodstains out?â
âWhy do you know how to get bloodstains out?â
âDamn, I got blood on my shirt.â
âDonât move, youâre losing blood!â
âI wonât let you bleed out!â
âYou have blood on your face.â
âI swear to god, if you get blood on meâŚâ
âWhatâs your blood type?â
âWhy in the hell would you need to know my blood type?â
WOUNDS
âThat cut is nasty.â
âYou have a massive gash in your arm/leg!â
âDonât touch it!â
âDonât move, youâll only make it worse!â
âIâll get some bandages.â
âYouâre going to need stitches.â
âThat looks infectedâŚâ
âDid you get bit by something?â
âThereâs no exit wound, the bullet is still in you.â
âThereâs an exit wound, the bullet went through you.â
AFTERCARE
âHow are you feeling?â
âHow does it feel?â
âItâs still not healed, but itâs getting there.â
âLetâs go home.â
âI just want to go home.â
âLetâs get you into the bathtub.â
âWe need to change your bandages soon.â
âGet some sleep, okay?â
âYou need to eat something, youâve been through a lot today.â
âIâll check up on you in a bit.â
âYouâre going to be fine. I promise.â
donât they know âââ
               itâs the end of the world ?Â
tag dump 1/?